Always a delight to find out that a silly guy is also a horny slut

Kiana Khansmith
Keni
Monterey Bay Aquarium
noise dept.

if i look back, i am lost

Origami Around
trying on a metaphor

JVL
almost home
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Mike Driver

izzy's playlists!
Xuebing Du
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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Peter Solarz

Andulka
sheepfilms

#extradirty
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@fangirl-giri
Always a delight to find out that a silly guy is also a horny slut

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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imagining simon with a reader that's extremely awkward since it's their first serious relationship.
simon was practically yearning for your touch, ready to burst at the seams and teeter over while you hesitantly refrained. you two had been dating for at least eight months and had known each other for longer around this point, so he was well-adjusted and within his comfort zone with you; he trusts you. you’ve had flings here and there, all of which lasted more than a month if you were lucky— not your fault these assholes did a complete 180 once you officially put a title on things. for a long time, you convinced yourself that it was your fault since the only common factor in all of those relationships was you until simon was practically desperate to prove you wrong— although his poker face and lack of flowery words would ever allow him to do so.
every time simon would try to get closer to you at night? you didn’t know what to do. cheek kisses? you’d just press your lips into a tight-lipped smile, managing a small “thanks” and averted your gaze. if simon tried to hold your hand? it was almost like you’d find a way to wiggle out of it. it was almost like you weren’t used to affection— how could you of all people not be used to affection, he wondered.
he started to eventually get discouraged at one point. he wasn’t one for affection often, but you didn’t seem to want to get closer to him— why didn’t you want to get closer to him? he’d try to brush it off, but he wasn’t good with words and touch was all he had left.
it was abruptly brought up when you two were seated on the couch, his eyes mindlessly mapping out how your hair framed the side of your face, assuming it began to tickle you from the way you raised your hand and began to gently scratch the softness of your cheek. “why do you move away from me when i try to touch you?” he suddenly asked, his voice vibrating in his chest. he caught onto the way your jaw undulated at the question which only fueled his curiosity. were you aware you had been doing this to him? were you dangling your affection above his head? what a cruel game if you were, honestly. “um…” you began, a silence ensuing between you two. you didn’t know what to say— what could you say? your reasoning felt silly the more you thought about it— you didn’t want to push simon away of all people.
“i don’t know what to do or where to put my hands… and im afraid i’ll get clingy. its not that i dont like it… i do…. i just…” you mumbled, your eyes flickering between his and the tv.
…that was it?
you didn’t know where to put your hands and you thought you’d be clingy just after giving him a small hug? small kiss? he stifled a laugh which you caught onto, prompting a small pout to form on your plush lips. “why’re you laughing? i’m being serious!” you groaned, slightly frustrated at the feeling of simon not taking this seriously. simon took your frustration in stride, the roughness of his hands grazing across your cheeks as he gingerly cupped the sides of your face. “s’nothin— nothin a’ all…” he mumbled, secretly on cloud nine as he silenced you with a kiss, feeling you tense up to which he elicited a throaty chuckle. “it’s not— s’not funny!” you attempted to reprimand him which failed, seeing as how you were holding back your laugh at simon’s smile and at how ridiculous the situation was now that you thought about it.
“you’re right. i’m afraid you’ll be like a leech if you get used to me.” he mumbled against your lips. he was pleasantly surprised at the feeling of your hands returning the gesture and cupping his face, your thumbs grazing the stubble which pricked and prodded needles into the soft pads of your fingers. “shut up.” you mumbled back, pulling him down onto the couch with you as he landed on your chest. he tried to ignore the rapid beating of your heart and how it hammered in your chest, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t think it was cute.
if you weren’t used to affection, he’d have to change that.
5 times Draco used Legilimency on Hermione +1 time she used it on him
Summary: Hermione has ADHD/AuDHD and Draco finds the way her mind works compared to others so fascinating he can't stay out.
Rating: T (non-graphic torture, a couple suggestive lines) ♡ WC: ~5k
A/N: my first published Dramione! (Looks at longfics languishing in drafts) Hope you enjoy! No beta; if you see any plot holes wither in the story or from Canon compliancy no you don't. Also I realise the summary sounds a little weird but I'm simply projecting as I write this Hermione and would like to find my own Draco who will find the way my brain is wired interesting/pos and not interesting/neg.
1. Wednesday, 10 January, 1996 (5th Year)
Draco shifted in his chair, glaring up from his parchment as the loud sound of a page turning interrupted his previously quiet study session. He was mildly surprised to find that the perpetrator was none other than the studious swot herself, Hermione Granger. He’d thought she had more respect for the sanctity of a library and its quietude.
A hint of colour crawled up her cheeks as she caught his stare, but she didn’t look away.
something something... ghost being unable to cook to save his life so he chooses to frequent at a beat up broke down poor ass canteen with cheap meals where reader prepares and delivers the dishes.. so he offers her a job as a private chef in his own house and she agrees because he pays her money like he sleeps on it.... and then he actually invites the lads over for a sunday roast made by his missus.... oh, she doesn't like it when he calls her that? well it's too bad, he already got her evicted from her previous place and fired from the bar she was working in so she can do longer shifts.. he also might have fucked her raw once or twice while she was "working", what's the difference? he already has her saved as wife in the contacts soo....
i think im going to write this lol wish me luck
Therealshaunasshade

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perv ghost but he’s also a little freak stalker and the darling likes it doesn’t she
yes yes yes this is me i’m a little freak and I like big freaks like him <33
c/w: stalker!ghost, reader likes it though, somnophilia but not really bc the reader is awake, dub-con
Make the commitment that, not matter how lonely you get on your journey, you will not reinvite toxic people back into your life.
a girl is never simply grocery shopping btw. she is grocery shopping and running away from the horrors. she is grocery shopping and trying to find her childhood whimsy somewhere between the aisles. she is grocery shopping and feeling an amount of grief that is insurmountable. but she is never just grocery shopping
Being a young adult is so strange. You enter a coffee shop. The 20 year old girl waiting behind you cried all night because she just came to a new city for university and she feels so alone. That 27 year old guy over there works a job he is overqualified for, he lives with his parents and wants to move out but doesn't know what to do about it. That one 24 year old dude already has a car, a house, and a job waiting for him once he graduates thanks to his dad's connections. The 26 year old barista couldn't complete his higher education because he has to work and take care of his family. The 28 year old girl sitting next to you has no friends to go out with so she is texting her mother. That couple (both 25 years old) are married and the girl is pregnant. The 29 year old writing something on her laptop has realized that she chose the wrong major so she is trying to start all over. We are not alone in this, but we are actually so alone. Do you feel me
Don't leave this in the tags.
this fic (like strings of hearts beating entwined, this life is alight because it's with you by @/yourendlessblue on ao3) was one of the first ones I read and. Ugh. I think it's like the only one that I regularly think back on. it's a sickfic but it's so much more, I think it explores the guilt and fear associated with a loved one being sick very well (also dw it has a happy ending LMAO), and i've read it like 5 times I think. Every so often I go back and read it and every time I find more and more to appreciate. I drew one of my favorite scenes between Loid and Anya though basically the whole thing is gold, I'd draw it all if I could. I highly highly recommend this to anyone who hasn't read it yet, I feel like it's a staple read (also if anyone knows if the author has a tumblr pls lmk so I can properly tag them lol)
me when I can't decide between drawing angst or silly

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baby calls reader ‘mama’ the first time and reader is immediately like oh my god i’m so sorry simon i swear i didn’t teach her that i know im just the babysitter but simon is just like ‘no it’s fine darling don’t even worry about it’ because he’s been teaching baby to call reader ‘mama’ behind her back the whole time
finds out when johnny drops the baby off like there's mama and you're already trying to stammer out a response but he's not having it. "have a good day, mrs. riley," then looks at the the baby. "be good for yer mama, alrigh'?"
OI.
SIR. SIR COME BACK I HAVE A DATE SIR. CANT TAKE THE BABY WITH ME.
now you're being dragged to a surprisingly nice restaurant by simon because "if ya wanted to go out on a date, coulda jus' say so."
you'd be angry but the wine is $300 a bottle so you guessss you'll stay and enjoy it.
yeah it ends with him covering your mouth while he fucks you into the couch. "gotta keep it quiet unless ya tryna wake our baby."
single dad simon not knowing how to be a dad. not his thing. doesn't get it. hand him a gun and he can take it apart and put it back together in his sleep. but a diaper? formula? baby food??? knows next to nothing.
so you see him, miserable old man with sunken dark eyes, hunched shoulders and a screaming baby at his doorstep with groceries in his hand and decide to help. (besides, you're also suffering with a lack of proper sleep)
he's not a good dad but he's a protective one. he's at your throat in an instant, baby in arm almost behind his back, ready to sink his teeth into your jugular. you squeak out that you're a part time babysitter. you can help. you've got the most experience with babies her age.
you keep your eyes on him, tired eyes now sharp as flint. it's scary how quickly he'd moved. footsteps barely a whisper. his breath chills your skin.
threatens you with your life if so much as a hair on her head is hurt. he must be really tired if he's willing to accept help being this defensive.
you take the chunky babe and bounce her as he opens the door to his flat. you don't dislike kids but you're not their biggest fan either. babysitting is just a means to an end. easy money that goes toward your tuition.
simon, you come to learn, doesn't care. he thinks you're the missing parent. he doesn't ask you if you can help watch over the child. simply knocks on your door and hands her to you with the diaper bag. mutters that he'll be back and with food.
he helps himself to your couch when you tell him that the baby is asleep. takes off his shoes and is snoring in seconds. simon also doesn't help the rumors going around the building. "a terrible parent, you are. how could you abandon your baby and husband? he's been struggling for months!"
simon leaves you sputtering when he tells them to stop talking about his missus like that or he'll kill them in their sleep. burp the baby, pet, or she'll keep us up all night.
at least he pays well :/
(if you go out for a friends night, which he will drop you off so stop talking about uber, he's telling you to go say goodbye to our baby who happens to be asleep in her crib and if you're wearing a short little number he's gonna watch you bend over to kiss her fat little cheek before he takes you to the bathroom to eat it from the back and is sending you to his car with trembling legs and a slap to your arse. don't look so tasty next time idk)
wake up; reader getting fucked from below by neighbour!Simon who keeps your hands pinned behind your back while he bullies the thickness of his cock inside you, just a little too deep. All too happy to let you drool on his shoulder as he drives into you again and again, watching the reflection of your ass bouncing heavy and fast over his lap on the black screen of your television. Scarred and tattooed arms sinking into your sides, anchoring you to him, implacable, insatiable. He was only supposed to pick-up a package mistakenly delivered to your front door, too heavy for you to bring it over yourself. Only supposed to have 'a cuppa, if you have it, pet.' Only supposed to take a kiss, soft, fleeting. Only supposed to 'touch it, over yer clothes, promise.' Only supposed to rub against the outside, slotting his ruddy, leaking tip between the already soaked lips of your pussy. Only supposed to pull out, come against the curve of your ass.
But Ghost can be neighbourly, he can go above and beyond. If it's for you.
pervy neighbour! simon who'd refused to indulge in his attraction to you when you'd first met, telling himself you were too young and too innocent to engage with the likes of him.
pervy neighbour! simon who avoided being in your vacinity at all costs, simply to avoid the raging hard ons he'd get when he'd see you. he'd be scurrying away to his abode to nurse his angry cock, if he did stumble upon your form.
pervy neighbour! simon who knew you left your bedroom blinds open to rile him up, so he could see your naked form fully on show after a shower. he imagined your soft, supple skin under the hot palms of his hands.
pervy neighbour! simon who secretly took pictures of you from his window to wank off to ans showed them to his army buddies at the pub, having a whole new roll ready to flaunt each week.
pervy neighbour! simon who watched you get fucked by the guys from class and fucked his fist to the sight, swearing he could please you so much better.
pervy neighbour! simon who cums all over his thighs and carpet as he watches you hump your pillow, head thrown back in desperation.
pervy neighbour! simon who steals a pair of your panties when he catches you doing your laundry in the estate laundry room.
pervy neighbour! simon who sniffs and laps at the dried juices on the flimsy fabric, pupils blown out and mind buzzing with sheer euphoria.
pervy neighbour! simon who breaks into your flat while your at work one day and installs cameras, so now he can watch and hear you at all times.

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something something taking on the mannerisms of your loved ones
Smoke Gets in Your Eyes
“They said someday, you’ll find all who love are blind. When your heart’s on fire, you must realize smoke gets in your eyes”
Smoke Gets In Your Eyes by The Platters
Loid’s a little silly and hasn’t realized how much he loves his little found family. Smoke’s gotten in his eyes, I guess.