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Kate waves as you exit the elevator and slowly walk to the bullpen. Gibbs walks quickly around you and disappears soon after. You make your way over to Kate and to your dad’s desk. 

“Good to see you Y/n.”

You smile shyly at her and sit down, glancing over at Ari’s face on the screen, smile falling quickly. He still is handsome in his quit for medical school, but your stomach turns as you think of how he held your father’s team hostage only twenty-four hours after being with you. The guilt is incredibly overpowering. 

Your phone vibrates in your pocket and you see Sarah’s name flash across the screen, begging for a girl’s night. You chew your lip and look around for your dad. Maybe if she were to come to his house? There’s no chance he would allow you to go anywhere else. Texting that you’ll ask, you slide the phone back into your pocket and watch as your dad makes Kate follow him, off to another case you’re sure. Maybe you’ll go find Abby or Ducky.

“You check in every hour until eleven. I will have an escort pick you up at eleven hundred hours tomorrow morning. If you are even five minutes late I will have them break down Sarah’s door. Do you understand?”

You nod, trying to hide the excitement as your dad hands you your GPS phone. After a heart to heart with Abby, she somehow magically pulled strings with Gibbs and got him to agree to one sleepover inside Sarah’s house with surveillance at unknown times and check ins. You can’t complain.

“Thanks Dad.”

You hug him quickly and then barrel out of the bullpen as quickly as possible. You haven't got to see Sarah in weeks, with finals coming up and your father being down your neck. The elevator dings for the lobby and you wave at the guard as you pass through. He gives you a smile and waves back as you exit the building. D.C. is busy as per usual and you wait at one of the crosswalks. You can’t wait to just gorge yourself on pizza, drink lots of wine, and gossip with Sarah. You don’t appreciate something until it’s truly stripped away from you.

Something sharp sticks into your back just as the crosswalk flashes for everyone to walk and someone grabs your arm and leads you across the street. A quick glance to the right and a middle eastern man frowns down at you. Your stomach ices over.

“He’s expecting you.”

Your dragged to the left and toward a small foreign car. He opens the back door where another man is waiting for you, gun already aimed at you.

“Toss away from your tracker phone.”

“No.”

The man beside you snarls and quickly pushes you against the car and wrangles it from your pocket, tossing it onto the ground and stomping it into a million pieces. You swallow around the fire in your neck and duck as he shoves you into the rear seat. You look back and see him sheath a knife to his side.

“Sorry about this.”

The man beside you flings out his arm and hits your temple, completely knocking you into unconsciousness.

⬹⬹⬹⬹⬹

Humming is what first brings you to consciousness. Then the crack of your eyes into the setting sun and the pounding of your head. Your mouth is dry and you feel like you’ve been drug through sand. 

“I see you’re awake.”

The familiar voice makes your blood turn cold. You push yourself up on the made bed, ignoring the headache and look toward the voice. He stands beside the window, looking out toward what might be a red barn? He looks just like he did at the club and even on the video footage your father had of him.

He turns to face you and the frown on your face makes the crease between your eyebrows hurt.

“No thanks to you.”

“I do apologize for my men’s tactics. They’ve been dealt with accordingly.”

“Just like how you dealt with Gerald in autopsy.”

He tilts his head and gives you an award-winning smile. You regret everything about that night, especially knowing that this monster has seen you at your most vulnerable.

“I know you’ve been staying with your father Y/n. This is one of the easiest ways to get Gibbs to find me so I can kill him.”

“You would use me to get to him after all this time?”

“You’re the reason I found out how to get into autopsy. I just needed to figure out a means to an end. Imagine my luck that I find the only daughter of the man that shot my brother in the same club as me. What even better luck that she sleeps so soundly she didn’t hear me rifling through her papers and messages from her father, including all directions on how to get to NCIS.”

Your face pales and you have to look away from Ari. You’re the reason he was able to sneak into NCIS so easily. He tuts and pushes off the wall toward you. You move just as fast, slinging yourself off the other end of the bed and running to the bedroom door. You try to yank it open, but it seems to be locked…from the outside. 

You turn around, leaning against the door hard and watch as Ari advances on you. He tilts his head as he stops a few feet in front of you, just observing.

“I meant everything I did that night Y/n.”

He raises a hand and you close your eyes, turning away from him. Instead of the sting of a smack, you feel his fingers gently run through a piece of your hair and put it behind your ear.

“Let me show you how much you mean to me.”

“No…”

He quickly grabs you around the waist and throws you over his shoulder, walking over the bed in just a few short steps. 

“Put me down Ari.”

“With pleasure.”

He tosses you down on the bed. As soon as you hit the mattress you turn over and try to crawl away. He tuts at you and grabs your ankles, dragging you back to him. He lays over your body and lays his head so he whispers directly into your ear.

“I know you enjoyed me Y/n. You could come with me you know. Once this is all over?”

“After you kill my father you mean?”

You try to wiggle out of his grip, but he presses into you harder. As he does so you gasp as he grinds himself into you. Against your will, your body responds and you shiver at the feel of him.

“You like that don’t you sweet girl?”

“It’s a bodily response.”

“Naturally,” he nips your earlobe and sits up, straddling your hips as he lets his hands wander down your back, massaging as he goes.

“You have no idea what these curves do to me.”

Fabric rips and you feel your shirt relax and then Ari unlatches your bra, leaning down to kiss between your shoulder blades. 

“Kick off your shoes Y/n.”

You freeze and tilt your head to look at him through the corner of your eye.

“No.”

“Very well then.”

Ari wrangles your arms up, even as you begin to struggle again, and with a click they are handcuffed to one of the bed posts. YOu huff in frustration and pull at them with all your weight.

“There, there Y/n.”

Ari extracts himself from you and begins to gently take the rest of your clothing off. All while he speaks to you in another language that even in the position you’re in, makes you want to curl your toes.

Once you’re fully naked, he lifts your hips and places a pillow underneath them, pushing you back down.

“I don’t think I can be gentle tonight, my dove.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything else from a terrorist.”

He tuts and gently probs your entrance with his length. Without a warning, he fully sheathes himself and the moan that leaves our throat is almost animalistic. His head falls between your shoulder blades and he starts thrusting automatically.

“I think I’ll keep you.”

**************

The club music vibrates the ground as you and Sarah stand outside waiting on the bouncers to look at your ID. Ever since nine eleven, security has increased tenfold, even at clubs in D.C. Or so your Dad told you.

Your feet already ache from the heels you chose and the wind almost makes the bright pink dress fly up as you wait. Two more people enter and only one couple stands in your way. You vibrate in excitement, stomach burning from the pregamed Fireball you shot beforehand.

“I really needed this.”

You get ready to respond, but stop as a bike races by and squeals to a stop right in front of the blockade. The driver throws out the kickstand and easily slides off the bike. His yellow helmet comes off and he cracks his neck as he walks up to the bouncer and automatically gets motioned in. You bite your lip and let your eyes wander down to his swaying hips as he disappears through the doors.

“I think I really needed this too.”

Your hips sway in rhythm to the music and your grind back against Sarah, giggling as the vodka redbull in your hand drips down your arm as someone knocks into you. 

“I’m going to go get another drink.”

Sarah nods, but by the nauseated look on her face you think it very well could be the end of your night. You sidle over the bar and lean against it as the bartender waits on another. Your drunken haze has effectively worn off and now a slight buzz is all that is left. 

“Vodka redbull again angel?”

You turn your head to look over your right shoulder and grin as you see the biker leaning against the bar beside you.

“I think I better stick with water this time.”

He nods and waves down the bartender. Only seconds later does water slide down to you and glass of bourbon to him. He takes a sip and you turn your body so you face him. 

“Your friend seems to have left you for the night.”

You glance around and then look down at your phone to see Sarah had got an Uber and went back to her sister’s apartment. The plan was to go back to yours, but she was too drunk for that.

“It appears so.”

“Perhaps I could escort you home?”

His accent sends a trill through your body and you look around. You’ve never been one of those girls to go home with a guy. But, his caramel toned skin and chocolate eyes make you melt a little at the knees.

“Only if you know how to show a girl a good time.”

He grins and takes your hand, guiding you through the clashing bodies and back out to the now empty street. He hands you the red helmet and slides onto the parked bike.

“That’s the only way…”

“Y/n.”

He repeats your name with a purr and you shiver. 

“Ari, now put your address in here and let’s get out of here.”

You do as he directs and will yourself not to think of your dad at a time like this. He would kill you for breaking at least a dozen of his rules. But just for tonight, you refuse to acknowledge them.

*********************

Your back slams down on your bed and you gasp as Ari grins down at you. Since locking your apartment door, it’s been nothing but teeth clashing and tongues fighting for dominance. That is until he used his weight against you and threw you onto your bed.

He places a hand beside your head and gently leans down, kissing you gently. 

“Beautiful.”

You blush and let him shimmy you out of the pink dress, revealing the thong Sarah convinced you to wear. He raises an eyebrow, a scary grin crossing his face and then he lands sharply on his knees. His finger plays with your slit and then curls around the string of the thong to move it out of his way. He leans his face forward and licks a long stripe up to eventually suckle on your clit.

You moan, throw your head back, and bring your own hands up to play with your breasts. He continues to work you over for what seems like ages, even as you orgasm twice. Only after a third does he lean back and grin as your eyes meet.

“Good enough treatment for you angel?”

You giggle and motion for him to come closer. He follows your instructions and stands, shedding his own clothes in the process. He has a few scars along his abdomen, but you stop looking as you watch him pump himself in his hand as he watches you. 

You scoot back on the bed, throwing your thong somewhere in the room and take a deep breath for courage as you spread your legs wide for him. He grins at the invitation and soon follows you on knees until he is between your thighs.

“Tell me if it becomes too much.”

You nod and he slowly begins to sheath himself, matching your groan as he enters you. Only when he is completely inside does he stop and let you both catch your breath. You’ve never felt so full in your life, or so wanted. He gently kisses your forehead and wipes hair away from your face.

With an encouraging nod, he begins a slow pace and then eventually works himself up to brutal thrusts. With your head thrown back and fingers clenching the sheets, you see stars and pray to whatever god that this night never ends.

Unfortunately, it does. The next morning, Ari is nowhere to be found.

*************************

A few weeks later you find yourself in NCIS headquarters. The front desk hands you a visitor badge and you work your lip as you wait on the elevator. Your dad really doesn’t like to be surprised at work, but when his face went over the news screen, NCIS using all media to try and locate the terrorist, your heart dropped.

You’d fucked up. Big time. 

The door dings and you slowly step out of the elevator and walk slowly into the bull pen. The quietness is eerie and you look around for Gibb’s gray hair. Your neck swivels and you stop at the first desk. A petite woman is leaning down and reading reports as you stop in front of you. You open your mouth, but jump as a whistle sounds beside you.

“Well good morning Tony.”

You look over at the sound and see a man leaning against a desk opposite from the woman’s. You clear your throat and cross your arms to hold your elbows. 

“Long way from Georgetown don’t you think?”

“I’m looking for my dad…”

Tony’s face pales and the woman behind you chuckles. 

“Tony’s worst nightmare.”

  She comes around her desk and holds out a hand.

“Ignore him, he’s a pig. My name is Kate. Now, who are we looking for? Perhaps one of the special agents in…”

“Y/n?”

You stand up straighter and look up at the stairs leading to the second floor. Gibbs walks down slowly and you hear intakes of gasps as he comes to stand in front of you.

“What are you doing here?”

Your lip begins to wobble and his stern face melts into one of concern.

“I messed up Daddy.”

An arm curls around your waist and he directs you to his office chair, sitting you down gently and then sitting himself down on his desk. You look around and feel your face pale as Ari’s grinning face smiles back at you. You quickly look down at your hands and let the tears fall freely.

“Tell me what’s going on Y/n…”

You take a deep breath and look up at your father, preparing yourself for the absolute war that is to come. You point a finger to the computer and when your father follows the line of direction he quickly stands and leans down to look you in the face. 

“His name…his name is Ari.”

He rolls his eyes, a small tilt of his lips as he squeezes your hips and then lets you go as you walk toward the doors. You open them and follow the soft chatter to the kitchen. As you both round the corner, Cassian grins at you both and Nesta leans up from taking something out of the oven.

“Y/n! You got Az to come…”

She flushes at the small insinuation and you both giggle.

“That’s the idea.”

You walk further into the kitchen to help her, with whatever she is definitely going to burn as Azriel takes a seat beside Cassian at the bar, both bat boys watching over you.

“What are we attempting?”

“I was trying to make cookies. The chocolate chip ones turned out great, but I keep burning the sugar cookies.”

“We can fix that,” you roll the sleeves of your cream sweater up and Nesta grins, handing you a bowl of mixture.

“Let me get the wine!”

Hours and lots of mishaps later, you giggle as you and Nesta lead the boys upstairs. The boys drank whiskey as you both took the kitchen over and watched heatedly as you and Nesta began to dance with each other.

Nesta leads you all to a large bedroom with an even larger bed in the middle of the open room. She turns and arches a beautiful eyebrow at you.

“So what are the rules? They can make their own, but whatever happens tonight I don’t want it to affect our friendship.”

You think not for a moment.

“I think it would be nice to start with us and then switch like we talked about. I just don’t want anyone touching his wings.”

“I don’t want Cass to come in you or likewise.”

You nod in agreement, face flushing at the provocativeness of the situation.

Nesta must take note of your embarrassment and soon traces a fingernail down the side of your face, causing you to shiver. 

The room aura automatically changes and you become very aware that the two behind you are watching intently from chairs in front of the fireplace. 

“Why don’t we get comfortable?”

Heat blasts through you and the alcohol courses through you like liquid courage. You shake your head and slowly pull your sweater over your head. 

Nesta follows soon after and you can hear the whoosh of escaped air come from behind you. You smirk, knowing what you’re doing to the two warriors and keep undressing with Nesta until you both are bare.

You take a moment to admire her, unsure if this is the last time you two will ever experiment like this. 

It’s not like you didn’t know she was beautiful. That much was obvious. However, you didn’t realize how devastatingly beautiful she’d be naked. Not a blemish on her. Very different from your calloused hands and burnt arms from the bakery.

As if she knows, she gently takes your hand and places it on her hip.

“Don’t be nervous. It’s just us friends here…”

She cautiously leans forward, watching your face as she gently pecks your lips. You jolt, even though it was expected and blush ferociously. The males behind you groan in sync and Nesta grins devilishly. 

“Let’s give them a show.”

She suddenly grasps a handful of your hair and crashes her lips against yours. 

Heat overwhelms you and you find yourself pulling her hips closer to your own, desperate for any kind of friction. 

A sudden nip at your throat as she pulls back and you gasp, allowing her to infiltrate the wet orifice. 

You imagined it would be different with a woman, but where Azriel is hard, overwhelming muscle, Nesta is delicately soft and toned. A true feminine warrior. Nesta is ferocious, both of your hands exploring one another’s bodies, and only when you two are pulled apart do you stop. 

Cassian pulls you close against his naked chest and leans down, a shiver wracking your body as he whispers in your ear.

“Look at them.”

Your eyes trail over to the bed where Azriel stalks Nesta as she falls back onto the comforter, almost looking hesitant. That look soon disappears as she sees his arousal.

Cassian’s hard body is warm against your back and you can feel his own arousal through his underwear, the only barrier between you two. His head remains beside yours and his hands go between stroking your sides and tweaking your nipples as you watch Azriel climb onto the bed.  

“Do you like watching your mate finger Nesta while I play you? Sharing is caring after all.”

His voice is husky in your ear and you lean into his chest as his long fingers glide over your slit in rhythm to Azriel’s foreplay.

Nesta throws her head back into the pillows and moans beautifully as he adds another finger.

“Hold your legs open.”

Nesta obeys and you feel your own thighs clench as you see her core fully on display. Azriel flashes a smirk over his shoulder at the small noise you make and then turns his attention back to her. Curse your mating bond, he knows exactly what you want to see.

Just as Azriel directs Nesta to climb on top of him as he lays down, Cassian thrusts his finger inside you, thumb circling your clit expertly. Your legs almost give out, but Cassian chuckles and holds you up with his other meaty forearm.

His lips nibble at your ear lobe and you moan as Nesta sinks onto Azriel’s cock.

“Watch how good my mate is at riding his cock Y/n. Tell me, how badly do you want mine?”

“Cass please…”

Azriel growls from across the room, but your attention remains on Cassian. The way your head is tilted you can just barely see his smug features.

“Why don’t we go give them some of our attention beautiful.”

Cassian picks you up swiftly, extracting his fingers and licking them quickly. Nesta hisses as she watches your approach, rhythm never stopping as she rides Azriel, hands grabbing his chest.

Cassian plops you down on the bed and you turn your head to watch as he quickly sheds his underwear, stroking his thick cock and tilting his head mischievously as he does so. He’s much thicker as Azriel has more length. My how both you and Nesta skimped on the details.

“Kiss them.”

You lean up quickly and pull Nesta’s mouth into yours. It’s all teeth and tongue, but the boys seem to enjoy it.

“Now him, but keep your ass in the air beautiful.”

You pull away, both of you panting and crawl up the bed to lean over Azriel, allowing your ass to be on full display. Azriel’s eyes are entirely black and he smirks as you lower your mouth to his, letting your tongue explore his mouth once more.

Your hand moves to rub his chest with Nesta, but a harsh slap to your ass makes you pull away quickly, yelping in the process.

Both Nesta and Azriel whine in approval.

“I didn’t say you could touch them.”

You pull your body up so you're on your hands and knees and throw a look back at Cassian, who swallows thickly.

“Then do something about it.”

Azriel huffs from beside you and without a warning, Cassian grips your hips and thrusts into you in one go. A loud moan falls frown your mouth and you collapse onto Azriel’s outstretched hand, shivering at the inundation of pleasure.

“Say that again, I dare you.”

His thrusts are vicious, and you turn your head to watch Nesta time her own thrusts with Cassian’s. Azriel’s other hand plays with her clit and she plays with her own nipples as she throws her head back in pleasure.

A smack to your rear brings you back to your own demise and you look back at Cassian. His eyes are wild and he snarls as you give him a wicked smirk, quickly pulling you up against his chest by your shoulders and wrapping one hand around your throat, absolutely railing into you.

His rhythm keeps you on the brink of pain, but you don’t think you’ve ever been so turned on. 

“That’s right Y/n, take what I give you and watch as Nesta makes your man come.”

Nesta lets out a shrill scream and then quickly falls off of Azriel, her hands taking over. Azriel in turn throws his head back and after a few pumps from Nesta spills all over his stomach. 

Your stomach clenches and you close your eyes, feeling your own release coming much quicker than theirs thanks to Cassian’s brutal pace. 

“Me too darling…”

He bites your neck and makes tight circles with his other hand around your clit, sending you quickly over the edge. Your entire body tightens and you almost black out from the ecstasy you feel. Cassian growls as you tighten around him and quickly pulls out of you, turning you around and pushing you down onto the bed.

He jerks himself quickly over top of you and then ropes of come land in your opened mouth and across your chest as he hisses his completion. 

You swallow what you can and let him fall beside you, wrapping an arm around your waist. You shiver uncontrollably and glance at the others. 

Nesta is closest to you as Azriel holds her against his chest, both facing you two and watching you with identical impressed expressions. 

A few moments later, Azriel hands Cassian a washcloth and he sits up, gently cleaning himself and you off. Once finished, both men stand and switch sides after kissing both Nesta and yourself gently.

As soon as Azriel crawls in behind you, you relax into his body like a puzzle. A perfect fit.

“You did so well Little Shadow.” You purr at the affirmation and watch as Cassian seems to do the same. Nesta smiles at him, but soon interlocks her legs with your own, inevitably pulling you and Azriel closer.

Nesta rubs her nose against yours and you give each other a sleepy smile.

“Better than expected?”

“Absolutely.”

The gardens overlook the Rainbow from a distance and coupled with the night sky, it seems almost otherworldly Though I guess technically everything is compared to where the Archeron sisters used to live. 

Azriel finds you quickly as he and Cassian arrive from Windhaven. You feel him before you see him.

It wasn’t easy getting used to the bond, but the main frenzy was fun enough. You watch as his shoulders loosen just slightly and a few shadows escape him and circle around you.

You giggle as they nuzzle your cheek and then shyly smile up at Azriel as he meets you and leans down to give you a small kiss. More public affection than you ever thought possible coming from the shadowsinger.

“Congratulations.”

You’ve grown used to his small vocabulary in public. It matches your own style just as well. In the privacy of your home is where conversations flow and it suits you just fine that he saves that side of him for you. You only.

“Thank you.”

You let him wrap an arm around your waist and you watch together as people play with the puzzles and observe all of your hard work. In the distance you can see Elain and a timid Lucien looking over the flowers from Day Court. You knew she’d like them.

You slightly wish she wouldn’t have shown up.

As soon as the thought passes, your heart clenches and you regret it. Elain has been nothing but supportive of your bond to Azriel.

“Y/n…”

Azrie kisses your head and you look up at him guiltily.

“I can sense your frustration, what is it?”

“You will think me a fool.”

He only stares at you and you sigh before glancing back over in her general direction.

“I still find myself getting jealous of her. That you both sought after each other at one point or another.”

He’s quiet for a moment before a low chuckle shocks you and you turn in his arms to look at him. He wraps his wings around you for some privacy and leans down so his nose meets yours gently.

“My heart belongs to you Y/n. No past relationship or desire will ever change that. My own shadows threaten to torture me at your unhappiness.”

He pulls a smile from you quickly and you kiss him slowly.

“I love you Shadowsinger.”

His hazel eyes soften and you feel the reciprocation tingle down your bond, stronger than anything ever before.

You can feel his gaze on you, wherever he is, but refuse to even look in that direction. Eventually the intensity leaves , meaning he must have given up. 

The day flies by and as the sun sets as you walk yourself back to the bakery, feet aching and head pounding. You stop as you turn the corner and see Azriel and Nesta waiting for you. 

The bite of anger lashes through you and you stop closer to them, still trying to actively ignore them. Azriel steps in your path and finally you look up into his face. The sting of betrayal hits even harder as all you see is slight confusion. You turn to Nesta and you catch a glimpse of hurt that she quickly masks.

“Y/n…”

“It’s been a long day, if you don’t mind letting me go…”

You try to take a step around Azriel, but a wing shoots out to stop you. If you weren’t afraid of getting killed, you would punch it. You know how sensitive they are, but you are also aware wars have been started over less.

“Y/n please talk to me.”

You turn slowly then, anger fully on Nesta and she observes you assertively. You take note of the way her feet spread apart into a fighting stance and the slight movement of Azriel to Truth Teller. 

“Talk to you? I have nothing to say to either of you anymore.”

You turn to Nesta first.

“You let them. You let them make a bet about me. You let them joke like I was nothing more than a pawn in some stupid game KNOWING how it feels to be the black sheep.”

Her face falls and her gaze flicks to Azriel quickly. You turn to him finally, lip wobbling to your dismay.

“You made me for an idiot. Was I a bet? A fucking bet?”

Never in a million years would you have expected to see the pain in Azriel’s eyes that you do.

“Yes.”

The finality crushes your heart and you quickly rub your chest, tears falling. A sharp pang and twist later you watch as Azriel’s face pales and he takes a step back, clutching his own chest, nostrils flaring.

“You…”

“Guess you finally figured it out, didn't you Shadowsinger.”

“Mate.”

“Not anymore.”

You shove past him, tears cascading down your face and climb the stairs as quickly as possible. Nesta yells after you, but you shut her out with a final thud of the door. 

A week passes and you’ve never felt more alone. Your days are spent in the Artisan quarter or brief moments with Rivi in the bakery. Most evenings are still at Rita’s. She has finally taken a few days off and when she is there she takes the Inner Circle table for you after sensing the tension. 

Nesta has stopped trying to catch your attention and has even stopped coming to outings at night. You rarely have seen Azriel, but you feel him constantly. He follows you in the dark and even a few of his shadows still wrap around you at night. You caught a glimpse of him a few nights ago leaning against your balcony and you slammed the curtains closed with a finality. 

You miss them. You don’t want to, but the heart wants what it wants. Your entire chest feels as if it has been ripped out and now just a hollow, raw feeling is left. It’s a terrible feeling that leaves you miserable.

“Well that was an eventful night.” You jump as Rita jerks you from your thoughts and you smile at her.

“A bit calmer than usual though.”

She hums and helps you stack chairs. 

“What’s been troubling you lass? You and Nesta get in a fight? I haven’t seen you this dull since your mother passed.”

“Of a sorts.”

She stops and places her hands on her hips, waiting patiently.

“The commander placed a bet with the shadowsinger that he could not get me to warm up to him and Nesta went along with it. What they didn’t plan on was that he is my mate.”

Rita gasps and you look down at the cleanly swept floor.

“Oh lass,” she tilts your chin up so you look at her round face. 

She smiles and tucks a stray hair behind your ear.

“When the time is right, they’ll apologize. The Cauldron has a funny way of handling things. Now you need to head home.”

You sigh, extracting yourself from her grip and walking over to grab your coat. Could you really forgive him? Nesta you likely would with time. But him? 

You walk from the bar and down the familiar streets lost in thought. So much that you don’t realize someone is following you until they clear their throat.

You whirl around and squeak as Feyre smiles softly at you.

“Hi…Feyre I wasn’t expecting you.”

“I didn’t mean to frighten you. Azriel told me what happened.Well…I forced it out of him after Cassian slipped up. I wanted to apologize on their behalf.”

You sigh and fall in line with her as you two walk around the quarter.

“I am a fool.”

She snorts and looks firmly at you.

“Azriel is a fool. He’s never been one for words, but is always driven by his actions. I suspect he suspected who you were but was blinded by the friendly competition Cassian put forth. Don’t think he values you any less for it.”

You stay silent, only your shoes scraping the cobblestones.

“Has anyone ever told you of my time before I found my mate?”

You look over at her and shake your head. She motions for you to sit on an upcoming bench and takes a deep breath. 

“I was in love with the High Lord of the Spring Court. After Aramantha, he kept me in a gilded cage of sorts. That’s when I began to fall out of love with him. Rhys knew he was my mate, but never came forth about it. Not even when I left Tamlin and came to live in the Night Court. He kept it hidden from me and when I found out I secluded myself in a cabin for days, maybe even weeks. But when he finally came to apologize, there was nothing on this continent that could keep me from him.”

Your heart shutters and you play with your hands in your lap.

“What of the other High Lord?”

“I forgave him.”

“After everything he put you through?”

“Especially because of that. He loved me and he protected me as best as he could, or so he thought at the time. Even those who are centuries old still make mistakes.”

You both stand and she finishes walking you to your apartment.

“I’m hoping that you will consider hearing them out, arrogant as they may be.”

You hum and return the hug she captures you in.

“I’m so glad you’ve come into our lives.”

Her face warms and she disappears before your eyes as you say your goodbyes. She has given you a lot to think about.

You still think about it through your bath and even as you slowly open your curtains and open your balcony doors, letting a cool breeze in. You quickly climb under the blankets and watch the curtains blow in the breeze, sleep slowly weighing heavy on your eyelids and finally taking you. Maybe tomorrow. 

*****************************************

He doesn’t make his appearance until two nights later. You had a rare night off from Rita’s and decided to go to bed early. A tickling sensation on your cheek is what wakes you up first. Then the pull in your chest. Your eyes slowly come into focus and you see him standing on your balcony, a bouquet of purple flowers in his hand. 

Shadows swirl around your room and as your feet hit the floor, they seem to guide you to him excitedly. 

The door is open, but you know he’s waiting for permission. Things are different now. He stares at you intensely and you rub your arms as you stand just inside the balcony doors.

“You came.”

“You let us back in.”

A shadow glides over your arm and seems to warm at your stare.

You watch as Azriel takes you in. Hair mussed with sleep, sleeping shorts lopsided and a too big shirt. What he must think.

He shyly stretches out his hand and gives you the flowers.

“They are purple astrids from Day Court.”

You take them gingerly and smell the familiar scent. It used to smell like home, but now that scent smells scarily similar to the male in front of you.

“Would you like to come in?”

He nods and you step aside as he carefully brushed past you. He stands in the middle of your bedroom, illuminated by the full moon and street lights. You take a moment to observe him. He is devastatingly beautiful. His eyes flick to yours and you take a deep breath, walking past him, and crawling back into bed. You cross your legs and pat the spot beside you.

He gingerly sits on the edge of the bed facing you.

“I’m sorry.”

Your heart clenches and throat closes as tears well in your eyes as you will them away. You can be stronger than this.

“Would you have apologized if I wasn’t your mate?”

You watch as goosebumps rise on his arms as you speak the words out loud.

“It changed after the night in the alley. Well before I could tell Cassian the bet was off. Initially he just thought there was no way possible we would get along well enough to even go on a date.I took you to Day Court and when I saw the way Helion looked at you I knew it was more than just a bet. You’d become this mystery in my life that I had to solve, this constant that I didn't want to let go of. When you chose to stay here I felt as if you had chosen me. The bet was the furthest thought from my mind. Regrettably, I should have told them then but I forgot with all the time I was spending or watching over you.”

You know this is a lot for him. Emotionally and verbally so you scoot close enough that your knees touch and nod at him. He slowly lets a hand graze your face and you lean into the contact.

“Do you forgive me?”

“Yes.”

Like Feyre said, it’s an easy response. You couldn’t stay mad at him if you tried. 

He smiles one of the biggest smiles you’ve seen yet and pecks your lips quickly.

“Do you accept our bond then?”

You quickly open the part of your heart that you’ve been hiding for two nights. A string seems to burn between you two and he places his forehead against yours.

“Mine.”

You smile and let him lay you down on the bed s his eyes darken.

“Always.” The shedding of clothes is quick. Gentle kisses, soft touches, that is until you decide to gently bite his lower lip. A growl sounds through the room and you smile shyly at him as he leans back on his heels, very, very naked. 

You both look over one another and you feel your cheeks heat as he growls again.

“Get on your hands and knees, little shadow.”

You jolt and slowly extract your legs from around him and carefully flip over, face flaming even hotter at the new angle. Azriel places a gentle kiss to the small of your back and then lets his hands glide up your spine.

“Absolutely beautiful. There won’t be a spot of skin on you that I haven’t tasted once I’m done with you mate.” 

You shiver as one hand drops and begins to run up the inside of your thigh, stopping when he feels the wetness seeping.

“Who is this for?”

“Only you.”

He growls again and finally notches the head of his cock to catch at your entrance. Your breath halts and you drop your hands down with your head resting on your arms. 

Ever so slowly he pushes into you, chuckling at the tortured moan he pulls from you. 

“Poor little shadow missed my cock so much she can’t even speak…”

You snarl at the attempt to get a rise out of you and push back, making him sink fully into you. This time, he groans and lets his forehead rest on your shoulder as he lets you adjust once more.

A few moments later you grow tired of him and begin to wiggle your hips. Until his grip tightens and he begins to thrust into you quickly.

“Is this what you want? For me to fuck you?”

You whimper, unable to make any other intelligible noise. Who knew the shadowsinger talked so much in bed?

At a brutal pace, he pushes you deeper into the bed, frame bouncing off the stone wall. Good thing you don’t have neighbors. They would definitely hate you tonight.

“Tell me what you need, baby.”

“M..more Az.”

He rolls you two over onto your sides, pulling your left leg over his own, never stopping as he does so. One arm wraps around your waist and the other slithers between your legs, working your clit at an agonizingly slow pace.

Your legs clench and you almost feel him in your stomach at this angle. He must sense the change as he bites your neck and then leans his head back to whisper in your ear.

“Come on your mate’s cock.”

You do just that, toes curling and back arching as you scream his name one last time. His hips shutter and two more thrusts later you feel him spill inside you with a loud groan. 

Like last time, your hearts pound and breathing synchronizes but you easily lean back into his embrace as he nuzzles your neck.

“Let me clean you up.”

He gently pulls out and you sigh as you roll over onto your back, watching as he disappears momentarily into the bathroom. 

He smiles at you as he comes back out, not caring at his nakedness. He gently wipes you down as your legs try to jump away from him each time he glides over you. He shushes you and then finally lays back down beside you, pulling you into his chest.

“I’m never going to hurt you again Y/n.”

You hum and kiss his chest as your eyes droop. You’ve never felt such love as you do now.

“I know Az. Stay with me?”

“Always, little shadow.”

The shadows hand the muffin to Cassian and he grins, giving Rivi a wad of change.

Azriel stares at you and a blush paints your cheeks. He smirks at the reaction and your heart skips a beat. As soon as he steps into the room it's like the entire dissolves away until it is just you two.

Or it would if Cassian wasn’t around.

“Y/n!”

He throws a heavy arm over your shoulder and you flinch at the contact. Azriel takes note and then surveys the rest of your body language. You throw him a glare and shrug out of Cassian’s grip all in one go.

“What can I get you two? This is Rivi by the way. She will be helping me from here on out.”

Cassian greets her with introductions, but you still feel Azriel’s gaze burning into your back.

“We actually were looking for you darling. Nesta wanted you to tag along to girls night tonight. She knows you're not working at Rita’s tonight so she wanted to take you out on the town. Now before you can answer, just know that I am not allowed to take no for an answer.”

“But…”

“She also is coming with an outfit for you.”

You deflate, the only argument you had going down the drain. Cassian grins as he sees that he won and pumps a hand in the air.

“I’ll let her know.”

He takes another bite of the muffin and turns to leave. Your eyes stray to Azriel’s and he’s watching you intently.

“Are you quite finished?”

He tilts his head and almost smirks.

“Behave tonight.”

You growl at his back as he leaves your shop. You turn back to the counter, angrily starting to sweep and hear Rivi giggle.

“Wow, you guys were meant for each other.”

“We are NOT together.”

She hums and then continues to check out a new customer as you grumble to yourself the rest of the morning.

Nesta helps you get ready late that evening with a rare smile on her face. 

“Emerie and Gwyn were too nervous to join us, but Mor and Feyre will be there. While I don’t always get along with my sister, she can let loose sometimes. Plus Mor told her she needed a break from Nyx for a bit.”

“Your nephew?”

“The best.”

She motions for you to stand and as you do you know the dress is way too exposing. She just claps her hands together and motions for you to turn.

“You look great. Perhaps we can set you up tonight.”

“That’s okay,” you definitely say too quickly.

She lifts a delicate eyebrow, but leaves it alone as she goes to change herself. She’s the only other person besides your mother who has been in your apartment now. The outfit she chose is beautiful. A crop top that exposes your stomach, even a few of your stretch marks to your disbelief and a long skirt that has two slits to each hip on each side of your legs. A beautiful navy material that shines in the moonlight. Peak night court fashion.

She comes out soon afterwards in similar fashion, but grey and with less slits.

“Why can’t I have that skirt!”

“Because you’re not mated and need to have fun for once.”

You roll your eyes and let her put charcoal on you two and then lead you from your house to the first of many clubs.

The bass pounds loud against the concrete and you lean against the bar watching Feyre and Mor dance drunkenly. Nests nurses a drink beside you, watching them do the same. You waver slightly and smile as Nesta motions to the dance floor. 

“Come on, one last time.”

You swirl around the dance floor for what seems like hours. Long enough for the music to fade and all of you to lean against the buildings as Feyre and Nesta wait on their mates. The clubs are closing and you close your eyes, breathing in the crisp air. 

Mor vomits in the alley beside you and Nesta snorts.

“Ladies…”

Cassian lands gently and Nesta automatically raises her arms to cling around his neck. Even in your drunken state a twinge of jealousy runs through you. You wave at her, but before you can lead yourself back to your house you feel him.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

You turn, stumbling against the wall, but still having enough energy to scowl at his shadowed face.

“Home.”

He watches you amused and you huff at his expression. Before either of you can say anything he scoops you up into his arms and starts walking down the street. A quick glance over his shoulder and wing shows that the others are long gone.

“Can’t you just leave me alone? You’re just teasing me at this point.”

“If I was teasing you I wouldn’t have let you come on my fingers.”

Your face flushes and you look away at the swirling buildings.

“I can take care of myself, shadowsinger."

He hums and begins climbing the well worn stairs to your apartment.

“I know, but if you don’t have to then you should let others. Nesta considers you a friend now. She’s going to fight for you regardless. If that means I drag you from your bakery every day then so be it.”

Your door opens and he easily takes you to your bedroom, gently laying you down on your bed and taking your shoes off. Even in your drunken state you see his hands shake. He stands back up and pulls the covers over your chilled body. Before you can think, your hand grasps his wrist and he stops, looking down at you.

“Don’t leave me in the dark…”

“You haven’t been alone since I first saw you little shadow. Rest, I’ll be here when you wake.”

Your eyes flutter shut allowing you to drift into unconsciousness, but not before you feel the soft kiss on your forehead.

A gentle stroke down your cheek wakes you first. Then the smell of eggs hits you. You open your eyes and sit up quickly…the world tilts and vomit burns the back of your throat. With a mad dash to the bathroom, you lean over the toilet and hurl your guts out.

You feel a breeze behind you and then HIM. Your hair is moved away from your face and you swat backwards at him feebly. 

“Go away.”

He hums and stays in that position until nothing else can come up. A shiver runs down your back and you know the shadows are stroking it. You rest your cheek on the porcelain and you feel him shift to flush the water. He gently scoops under your arms and lifts you into his own. You don’t have the energy to fight him. 

He takes you to the claw foot tub and gently lets you sit on the edge. He leans around you and you watch, stunned, as he runs the tub full of hot water and different oils. Once done he turns to you and you blush.

“I’ll go get your food.”

You nod and once you know he’s for sure gone, stand stiffly and slowly shed off the clothes Nesta let you borrow.

You sink into the water and let out a small moan as your head throbs. You should have known better than to try to keep pace with Nesta, a once upon a time alcoholic. Your eyes pop open as you smell eggs. Azriel stands stiffly by the bathroom sink, hazel eyes darkening at your own. 

The bubbles cover you entirely, but you still feel self conscious as he gently walks over, setting a board across the tub and then the plate on top of that. He squats beside you, eyes never leaving your face, and leans his chin on top of his crossed hands on the lip of the tub.

“Eat.”

Your lip curls at the command, but your stomach betrays you and growls loudly. His lips twitch and you slowly let yourself eat the food he offered. As soon as the eggs hit your taste buds, your eyes close and a small moan escapes your lips. Not only are you ravenous, but this is the closest to your mother’s cooking you’ve eaten since her death. 

You open your eyes again and blink away the tears, staring at the plate.

“Thank you,” you whisper.

You know he knows exactly what you mean. He hums beside you and watches as you slowly finish your plate. Only standing once you put your fork down. 

When he leaves, you quickly finish your bath, wrap yourself in a towel, and make yourself to your bedroom to dress yourself. The headache is wearing away and you dress yourself in a loose fitting t-shirt and sweatpants, knowing you won’t leave your apartment today. 

You let yourself out of your room and stop as you see Azriel’s towering figure in your small kitchen washing dishes. Something warms in your chest and you rub your sternum. A shadow twirls around your bare feet and he turns almost automatically when it does. 

You stare at one another until you take a deep breath.

“Thank you. You can let Nesta know I’m fine now.”

He doesn't say anything but slowly stalks toward you. You stay frozen in your spot even as you have to tilt your head back to look at him. 

“I didn’t stay for Nesta.”

“Then why…”

He silences you as his lips gently claim yours. You know better than this. You should push him away, punch him in the chest, fight any of this. Instead, you tangle your fingers in his hair as he lifts you and puts you on the counter, encasing you in his arms fully. When he finally breaks away, you both are gasping, lips swollen, pupils blown wide.

“Because I got a taste and you’re like a poison I’ve never experienced. Even if just for a short time, I have to know it intimately.”

He peppers kisses down the side of your neck and a small squeak spills from your throat.

“Please…”

He pulls back and looks directly into your soul, or so it seems.

“Tell me what you want, little shadow.”

You know better than to get involved with the shadowsinger, any of the Inner Circle for that matter, but this man has your gut clenching and thighs pressing together devilishly. 

“All of you Azriel.”

His lips tilt and easily lifts you, legs wrapping around his waist and takes you back to your bedroom, laying you down more gently than you thought possible. He stares at you and brushes a strand of hair from the side of your face and behind an ear.

“Let me take care of you little shadow.”

You nod and he slowly begins to lift your shirt. You sit up momentarily to help him and then lay back down at his gentle push. You definitely don’t regret the lack of undergarments this morning.

Azriel crawls up the bed between your legs and slowly starts to kiss down your chest as he hovers over you, shadows gliding over the exposed skin behind him. You hum deep in your chest and he watches you as his hands come to the waist band of your pants. 

You nod and he continues. Once you are fully naked, you quickly close your thighs and look away from him, cheeks heating.

“Don’t…” His hand wraps around your knee and he turns your chin so you face him once more.

Once you’re watching him, he slowly leans back and sheds his shirt and pants, leaving him in underwear that does little to hide his erection. 

You’d heard the rumors about Illyrians and their wingspan, but this just proves it.

He slowly pushes your knees apart and you look away as he lays down on his stomach, wings tight against his back.

“Look at me.”

The demand makes you look down and your breath leaves you. You can barely see his hazel eyes above your mound and as soon as you make eye contact he licks a stripe up your lips. An ungodly moan erupts from you and you feel his upper body shutter as you do so.

He wraps his lips around your clit and sucks gently as a single finger circles your entrance and then slowly sinks in. Your hands curl in the bedspread and your eyes close against your will, back arching at the pleasure.

He continues at a languid pace, adding another finger as you whine. 

“Az…”

He growls at his nickname and you feel an orgasm creeping up. Legs shaking, head clouding you try to warn him, but as he speeds up with his thrusting fingers you know he is aware. With a silent scream, the burn fades and leaves you in a white ecstasy. 

He leans back on his haunches and smirks as he licks his fingers. You watch, almost feeling drunk again.

He then begins to pull down his underwear. You gasp as he slowly reveals his cock. You know you’re not necessarily the most experienced in this area, but the one fae male you were with can’t even compare. Not only does Azriel have a length of at least eight inches, but is thick all the way around. 

He pumps himself a few times and looks down at you as he slides himself through your slick.

“Be sure to mark me how you want, little shadow, because once I take you you will have no one else.”

You bite your lip and he slowly begins to sink himself inside you. Your legs spread and your nails sink into his forearms as his head falls against your shoulder. He’s trying to be gentle, which is appreciated as you stretch around him. The burning is mild, but you’ve never felt so full.

“Oh little shadow,” he whispers as he nibbles on the shell of your ear.

You tilt your hips up, taking him fully and you both groan in unison.

“How do you want me?”

His hips are already pistoning in long, deep thrusts, but you know that’s not what you both need.

“Harder Az.”

He growls, wrapping a wad of your hair in his hands and pulling your face roughly to his as he begins a brutal pace. Your moans are taken from you with each brutal thrust and he grins against your swollen lips.

His shadows slide down your body and even tweak your nipples at one point, making your toes curl. 

Before long, the burn intensifies and you grip his shoulders.

“I’m going…”

“Let go baby.”

You tighten around him and he drops his head as you come, a few final trusts and he follows, spilling in you.

The room is silent except for your rampant breathing and galloping heartbeats. Finally, Azriel leans back and slowly extracts himself, making you whimper at the loss of contact. He sits for a moment, watching himself leak from you and then flicks his eyes back to your face.

What now? Will he leave and go back to Elain or Gywn? Will he expect you to be a booty call from here on out while he’s with someone else?

“Stop thinking so hard.”

He rises slowly and takes your discarded towel from this morning, wiping himself off and then gently cleaning between your legs. He then takes your sheet and crawls beside you, adjusting his wings so when you lay on his chest, one covers you in a blanket.

“Rest y/n…I’m not finished with you yet.”

Another wave of heat goes straight to your groin and you know you’re going to be in bed all day today. 

*****************************************

The next few days seem suspiciously normal. Azriel didn’t leave until early the next morning. He kept you in bed most of the day, only letting you leave to bathe or eat. He also let it be known that while he was aware you didn’t necessarily want a relationship, there would be no one else for either of you. You wanted to argue, really you did, but the look of absolute dominance had you halting and nodding all in the same go. You could sleep together without making it complicated right? Even at the thought your gut twisted and heart sank. You’ve really set yourself up for disaster. 

Patrons sit at the window bar stools and you smile as their low chatter fills your bakery. It’s almost like it was when your mother was still here. The bell above the door rings and you look up to see Feyre and Nesta entering. The chatter gets louder as everyone is excited to see Feyre. Nesta makes a beeline to you as Feyre stops to talk to some of them.

“Morning.”

You smile at her and hand her a chocolate croissant, one of her known favorites. No words are exchanged, but she gives you a small smile and bites into the pastry, groaning as the flavor hits her mouth.

“Delicious as always y/n.”

“I wish you could’ve tasted my mother’s. She made mine look like rabbit droppings.”

You’ve been thinking a lot about her recently and wondering why Azriel’s eggs almost had her magic. It tasted like home. You rub your chest when a sudden ache jolts you and smile as Feyre walks up. 

“Morning y/n. We wanted to come and tell you all the preparations are ready and the blueprints look wonderful. A contractor will be in contact with you possibly tomorrow and you may start whenever you wish.”

“Actually I was here to invite you back to the library before you got busy. She just chose to tag along.”

Feyre shrugs her shoulders with a small smile and you can’t help the chuckle that escapes you. You know the past between the two sisters, but you are also aware that Nesta would do anything for her and Elain. Even more so now for Nyx. For a fleeting moment, you wonder what it would be like to have a family, sisters…just not being alone. Again, wishful thinking though.

“Thank you both. Rivi takes over for me at two so I can come to the library sometime then. Thank you again for the opportunity Feyre. Please let me know if either of you are not pleased with something and I…”

She waves you off before you can say anything else.

“Nonsense. Enjoy it. All of your designs we’ve loved. I may enjoy painting, but I don’t have an architectural bone in my body. Thank you for your service.”

They stay for a few moments and then Feyre seems to convince Nesta to visit another shop near your bakery before heading back to the Riverhouse. With a grimace, Nesta looks away from you and follows her sister. You smile and clean the counter.

Hours later, you’ve changed into a basic blue dress and walk down from your apartment. As you round the corner you stop as you see Cassian waiting. As he sees you he waves cheerily.

“Ready?”

You try not to let the disappointment show. Against your better judgement you were looking forward to another Illyrian awaiting you. You nod and let him wrap a gentle hand around your waist and you bury your head in his chest. He lifts off quickly and your stomach drops at the sudden motion.

“Sorry I’m not the usual talk, dark, and scary chauffeur.”

“No worries. Saves me the trouble of grousing with him, or talking to a stone wall on the way there.”

Cassian chuckles and dips around a few buildings as he begins climbing. 

“Interesting since I can smell his scent all over you.”

You sigh and make sure to keep your face averted as flush rises on your cheeks. 

“It would be hard not to since Nesta made him escort me back to my apartment after girls night.”

He hums, but lets the conversation fade. Soon after he gently lands on the training area of the House of Wind. You’ve never seen it before, but you’re impressed with the extensiveness of it.

“Have you thought about it?”

You look around and already know your answer.

“Nothing against you guys, but this really isn’t for me. With the new project starting I don't think I could split my time anyways. Plus I’d just be one more person for you guys to have to wrangle or come and get.”

He opens his mouth, but someone clears their throat just in time. You turn and see Nesta leaning against the wall. 

“Stop pestering my friends, you overgrown bat.”

You snort, that being the first time you’ve ever heard her say that and step out of his grip to join her. She throws a backward wave to Cassian and begins to lead you into the mountain. You wave shyly at Cassian who rolls his eyes and cracks his neck soon after, going over to the punching dummies. 

Nesta must have missed your company as she talks more while you're together than you’ve ever heard her before. Clotho waved at you upon entry, but you both took up a place against a small alcove on the fourth floor, your previous books still waiting on you and Nesta. 

Over the next few hours you both shared a charcuterie board, spiced wine, and have shelved and unshelved more books than imaginable. Even now, you walk up a level in search of a book on healing foods. As if the library knows, which it likely does, it seems to direct you to a small section that requires you to get a stool. Your hand wraps around a large tome and dust falls in your face as you drag it down, coughing slightly.

There isn’t a title, but you flip until you see an index and then flip to the page on Prythian Healing Food.

Without a doubt, most healers will say the most potent form of healing comes through love or cooking. Healing cooks are few and far between. One born every five thousand years, they do not need any training. Whatever they bake, cook, or decorate will heal a wound, worry, or ache within an hour of digestion. 

Many compare the feeling to finding a mate. That leads us to cooking with love. Most similarly, a mate will offer food to the other to accept the mating bond. If not achieved yet, the food eaten will resemble the feeling of healing food. It can sometimes be confusing as to which is presented as mating bonds are so rare. 

You slam the tome closes, heart pounding. How absolutely ridiculous. Though as soon as you think about the word mate, your heart pounds and your chest aches. Is that what that pull is?

Mouth dry and hands shaking, you make your way back down a floor and try to find Nesta in the maze of shelves. You hear a shuffle of paper and follow the noise, certain you’ll find Nesta at the end. You open your mouth, but quickly halt as you hear a male chuckle.

“Well Nesta I believe we owe Azriel that favor. It seems he was able to get under y/n’s skin just enough she invited him to her bed.”

Your stomach drops and you quickly throw a hand over your mouth, stopping the gasp that wants to fall.

“Az?”

He doesn’t respond, but Cassian chuckles.

“Keep your secrets, shadowsinger, but I smelt you all over her this evening. I’ll pay up this once. How do you do it?”

A rustle of a change purse and Nesta sighs in the background.

“I can’t believe you two really betted on y/n. She’s a strong, independent woman and can choose for herself who she brings to her bed…”

“But we both know her and Azriel butted heads. He just wanted to prove us wrong.”

“Perhaps…” The words sting and you quickly turn and make your way as far away from them as possible. You knew better and yet here you are getting ready to cry over your own rash decisions. Your mother knew best to keep you sheltered. You should have listened.

You quickly bypass a worried Clotho and use the old entrance back to the city. Shame on you for ever thinking you’d be anything other than a baker in this city.

“Sorry sir, only things off the menu.”

He smirks and leans forward, running a crooked finger down a strand of brown hair that has fallen out of your ponytail.

“Shame, I…”

He stops, eyes going round and quickly wrenching his hand back, as if burned. His face paleing, he apologizes quickly and scoots off his stool disappearing into the crowd. You glance behind you and almost miss the shadow ducking behind your own shoulder. Glancing over, the spymaster isn’t even looking at you. He’s too invested in the conversation he’s having with the short one. A wave of anger washes over you and you quickly start another order, trying to distract yourself. 

Rita comes back almost five minutes later and immediately stops in front of you.

“What’s the matter?”

“Some male was hitting on me. I had it handled, but apparently a shadow scared him off. I guess from the shadowsinger. I don’t know who he thinks he is.”

Her smirk cuts you off and her eyes flick over to their table.

“Azriel often protects those that he claims.”

You grit your teeth and see that he’s quietly nursing one of the drinks that was brought over to them. Cassian and Morrigan are on the dance floor, Nesta and Feyre are chatting, and Rhys sits beside Azriel watching Feyre. Amren is nowhere to be seen. 

“I’m not a possession.”

You toss a rag on the bar and furiously clean a spot. Rita chuckles and slowly places a hand over yours. 

“Perhaps a break?”

You let loose a small sigh and nod. A break sounds good. You untie your apron and toss it on the rack beside the door. Before you can leave through the door though, you hear someone shout your name. Slowly turning, Cassian is waving on the dance floor. A few patrons turn to look at you and you flush a dark crimson at all the attention. You debate sneaking away, but Cassian quickly approaches you, Morrigan on his heels, face breaking into a large smile.

“Y/n! You need to come meet everyone. Rita won’t mind a few extra minutes. Wait, it's just now your break. Perfect!”

He grabs your arm with more gentleness than you even thought possible from the large male. He drags you across the dance floor, Morrigan giggling behind you. As you approach you can’t help but grimace as all their attention turns to you. Nesta’s face of horror likely matches yours. 

“What are you doing,” she hisses as she springs from the seats and takes your arm from him.

“So she can meet everyone.”

“Here?”

She looks back at you and grimaces.

“Sorry y/n.”

Cassian and Morrigan slide into the booth, the rest making room for Nesta and you. She slides in next, likely knowing you’d prefer an easy escape route. You gingerly sit on the edge of the seat, ignoring the shadowsinger’s gaze directly across from you. 

“Everyone this is Nesta’s new friend, y/n. She’s the baker here in the city.”

You cringe and lift your eyes slowly. Azriel watches you intently, but you just as quickly move off of his face and go around the circle, acutely aware of the dirty clothing you’re wearing to meet the High lord and lady.

Rhysand leans forward and smiles.

“The bakery near the artist quarter? Your mother must have been Aurora then?”

“Yes High Lord…”

“Rhys please. She was such a joy to this city. I was sorry to hear of her passing, though Azriel tells me she’s been gone a few months now.”

You shoot a scathing look at Azriel as he takes a sip of his drink, never taking his eyes from you. Nesta, possibly aware of the rising tension, clears her throat and begins introducing everyone.

“My sister Feyre, Mor, and of course you know Cassian and Az.”

You nod in acknowledgement and look at the clock on the wall. Another twenty more minutes to endure. 

The conversation flows around the table and you find your own lips lifting lightly at one of the more ridiculous stories Mor tells on Cassian. Just as you realize your time is almost up a small tendril of shadow gently brushes your wrist and you look up, meeting Azriel’s gaze.

“Did he touch you anywhere else?”

The table quietens some, but the blood pumping in your ears rises and you feel a snarl leave your body.

“That was none of your concern. Anything about my life is none of your concern. Spy somewhere else.”

You hear Cassian snort, but ignore it. You stand quickly, but Azriel follows suit making your head tilt to look him in the face. No emotion is over his face, but his shadows billow around him.

“It is when you dwell in Velaris.”

“No it’s not. I’ve been here fifty-six years and no one acknowledged my existence then and a dead mother should not change that now. I don’t need your sympathy or whatever perverted white knight act you’ve got in your head. I just want to be left alone to make ends meet. Don’t follow me home shadowsinger or you’ll regret it.”

“Is that a threat spitfire?”

His voice darkens and you slowly feel the anger leave your body. This isn’t just an Illyrian, this is the shadowsinger. He tortures for a living. You go into yourself and you see a flash of regret in his eyes.

“Enjoy your evening.”

You can’t meet any of their gazes and quickly return to the bar to help Rita the rest of the night, keeping your head low in embarrassment.

****************************************

The bouquet of flowers mock you every day as the bakery bustles the rest of the week. Every morning a fresh set is laid on the shop doorway. Every morning you trade out the old ones for the new. If they were any other flower you’d throw them away. That’s what you tell yourself anyways. 

You smile as you bag a loaf of bread for a particularly older patron and let your eyes glide over the opening door as the bell rings. You freeze as Cassian and Azriel walk in. Cassian takes a deep breath and sighs heavily, causing most of the attention to turn to them. Azriel, on the other hand, stares intensely at the flowers resting beside the cash register. You definitely should’ve thrown them out. 

They both have to tighten their wings in on themselves as they walk by tables and Cassian grins as he leans against the counter in front of you.

“Good to see you again y/n.”

You raise an eyebrow and look between the two.

“It’s been less than a week.”

A small smile curls Azriel’s lips and you look away quickly. 

“Yet you still haven’t come back to the house. Nesta tells me you’re lacking in cardio.”

You roll your eyes, spreading your feet, and crossing your arms all in one go.

“Nesta’s concern is unwarranted. I’m quite fine with the way I am.”

Cassian frowns, getting ready to say something else, but Azriel clears his throat. 

“We would like to offer training with some of the priestesses. Any morning works. You can come or not. The choice is yours.” 

“I’ll think about it.”

You turn away from them to help the next patron, still feeling Azriel’s gaze burning into you.

The rest of the week flies by and Nesta meets you Sunday evening with a small wave as you clean up the bakery. She previously sent a message asking to meet up with some of her friends for dinner by the river. 

“Who will be there again?”

You tuck a stray piece of hair behind your ear and rub your forefinger anxiously.

“The only new people will be Gywn who is a priestess and Elain, my sister.”

You nod and wipe the flour from your face, trying to look presentable. You’ve heard rumors that the shadowsinger was interested in her sister Elain, the gentle gardener. You can’t seem to figure how that would work, but none of your business you suppose. 

Nesta waits for you outside the shop as you lock up and you two walk quietly down toward the restaurant.

“Do you know Sevenda?”

“My mother knew her well. They bonded over their healing food. I still often trade with her. Spices for me and pastries for her. She has a wicked sweet tooth.”

Nesta chuckles and you look at the sky as you walk. The sun is just starting to set and the orange and reds of the sky remind you of the Day Court architecture you saw in the library books.

“Feyre would paint it.”

“As most do here in Velaris…I don’t mean to speak ill of artists…”

Nesta waves you off as anxiety claws at your gut. You and your mouth.

“It must’ve been hard growing up here surrounded by the same thing for decades.”

She really shouldn’t take pity on you, you’ve all heard her story.

“Others have it much worse than I. At least I was born into the Court of Dreamers and not Nightmares.”

“Mor turned out well enough.”

You laugh and suddenly the blonde appears outside of the restaurant, taking a seat closer to the street.

“What did I do?”

Introductions are made quickly and you slowly sit, willing yourself into a comfortable silence as Feyre and Mor lead the conversation. Gwyn talks excitedly to Nesta about something new Merrill found out from her research

“How did you meet Nesta?”

You jump as Elain speaks from your right side. She smiles sweetly at you and you can’t help but return a small, shy smile.

“We actually bumped into one another while we were both out shopping. She said something snippety to me and I told her to shove it. We had lunch after that.”

Elain’s laugh is almost whimsical and you see why everyone loves her. Not a mean bone in her body. You chat on and off with her through the night, even after all of you have drunk slightly too much spiced wine. 

You all push back from the table and break off in separate ways hours later. Nesta waves at you as you see Cassian glide down to her and the others walk back in their various directions. Azriel lands with Cassian and you don’t miss the way he watches Elain return to the Riverhouse. Or the way Gywn watches him as she walks back toward the Library. Seems like a true love triangle. Best to stay out of that.

You walk by yourself one last loop through the quarter and stop close to the concert hall as music hits your ears. So many people would be lucky enough to live in a place like this. So why do you dream of more? A shadow falls over you as you think and you quickly whirl around. 

He’s made himself known to not scare you, but you frown as a shadow twirls around one of your ankles.

“Stop following me.”

“Nesta insisted.”

You roll your eyes and turn away, walking toward your home. He follows behind silently.

“Don’t you have better things to do?”

“Yes.”

You stop and turn on him quickly, anger blazing as you see a small smirk on his stoney face.

“Then go do them. We both know you’d rather be with some of the other females from tonight.”

His expression falls and his jaw tenses and but you turn away before you can regret the response, trying to hide the slight fear you have of him and his moods.

“You’re the only female I want to be with right now.”

He follows you as you stop at your shop, turning to lean against the locked door.

“I’m not what you think I am. Actually I can’t fathom why you're here other than Nesta’s wishes. Gwyn obviously has a thing for you. I will not be involved in a love triangle or some other shit. I just want to do my own thing and…”

“Let me take you somewhere tomorrow.”

You stop and frown up at him.

“Did you not just hear what I said?”

He shrugs and the shadows swirl around him, almost whispering to your ears.

“You want to travel. Let me take you somewhere. Then you don’t have to speak to me ever again.”

“Why…why would you do that? We literally just met this century. Also how do you know I want to travel?”

He stands tall for a moment, long enough you begin to not expect a response.

“Because I know how it feels to be locked up. No one else has to know if that’s what you desire. I am, in fact, quite well at sneaking around.”

Your eyes fall to his scarred hands, but he doesn’t make a move to hide them this time. You look back up at him, meeting his gaze and tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Okay.”

**************************************

The early morning mist swirls around you as you walk skiddishly to the Rainbow. You didn’t sleep well last night, contemplating on how to turn down the shadowsinger. You’ve never traveled outside of Velaris, why start now? Just as soon as you had almost made up your mind a shadow seemed to disconnect itself from the others and gently stroked your cheek. It was then you decided one trip couldn’t hurt. 

Seeing him standing at the railing watching the water though almost has you changing directions. He must sense your approach as he looks over his shoulder and watches you stumble to a halt.

“You came.”

“I’ve always been too curious for my own good.”

You stand beside each other silently, looking at each other cautiously. He eventually holds out an arm and you know wherever he’s taking you is too far to fly. You’ll be winnowing. You stare at his black covered arm and then slowly wrap your hand around the leather. A roar of wind envelopes you and your stomach flips as you’re instantly transported.

It stops almost as soon as it starts. Bright light makes you squint and you slowly take in your surroundings. A tan cobbled path leads you around a well manicured lawn. Resting upon the lawn, that technically turns into a knoll, is one of the most magnificent parthenon’s you’ve ever seen.

Your chest shutters as the breath escapes you. Surrounding the large structure are two more architectural advances you’ve never seen before.

“How did…”

But the words stop as you turn to look at Azriel. The sun is just cresting over the plateaus and his shadows are slowly disappearing in the brightness. Even amongst his uncomfortableness, he stares at you, arms crossed. 

“How did you know?”

But of course he knows.

“It’s my job too.”

“Your job is to keep the Night Court safe, not stalk the baker.”

“My job is to know everyone in the city intimately. Your mother kept you well hidden until her untimely death, as my occupation kept me busy during the war. Now I’m making up for lost time.”

You want to argue, truly, but as the sun heats he begins to look increasingly more uncomfortable. Just as your heart aches a little, a voice clears behind you. You turn and see one of the most beautiful males; sun kissed skin, a white and gold toga wrapped around his muscular body, and gold sandals to match. He gives you a knowing smirk and you drop your gaze quickly.

“When Rhysand asked if visitors could arrive I must say this was not what I was expecting.”

He gently walks forward and grasps your hand, bringing it to his mouth and kissing it lightly.

“Welcome to Day Court. My name is Helion.”

You ask and bow quickly, wrenching your hand from his.

“Thank you for the invite, High Lord.”

He chuckles and motions for you to stand.

“I see Azriel’s broodiness and lack of manners has yet to rub off on you. Come I will show you our master architect.”

You carefully take his outstretched arm as he leads you closer to the parthenon. You glance back, seeing Azriel following, expression furious as he stares at your locked arms.

Much to your distaste, the day seems to fly by. The master architect, Baen, is very kind and allows you to follow him the entire day and never seems aggravated by your constant questions and observations. 

“I truly feel you missed your calling y/n.”

You sit on a pulley swing beside him as you both work on plastering the clay on one of the smaller structures.

“It is very similar to frosting a cake. Besides, my home is in the Night Court, where my mother rests eternally now.”

“You don’t think she would’ve wanted you to live more?”

You hum and finish your section, quicker than him even.

“It’s not worth my time to wonder. She’s gone and I remain in charge of her bakery now.”

You glance down at Azriel and he nods and begins to pulley you down to the ground. In the shade, he seems more comfortable and his shadows swirl around his feet, lower than usual. 

You slide from the swing and give him a small smile.

“It’s almost time to leave isn’t it?”

He looks at you for a moment and then tilts his chin to look directly in your eyes.

“That is up to you. Rhys made it clear that if you wanted to switch courts he would make it happen. Helion is a very…generous ruler. He has no problem accepting you.”

Once more, the shadowsinger takes your breath away. You would have never dreamed of ever having this option. 

“I can’t just…”

He tilts his head and a shadow gently grazes your cheek as a tear falls.

“Think about what you want y/n. You’d be well cared for, doing what you love…”

“But Nesta…”

“Could come visit.”

“Rita…”

“Easily could hire more help.”

“My shop…”

“Rhys could find someone else. This is about you.”

“Are you trying to run me out of my home?”

A small smirk tilts the right side of his face.

“I’m giving you the option that Rhys gave me. What makes your heart happy?”

You stare at him, his hazel eyes burning into yours and you know what your decision is. 

**************************************

You gently knock on the high lord’s study and a rumbled come in sounds from the other side. You open the door shyly and step into the two-story study. A magnificent blue rug adorns the floor and Rhysand and Feyre smile at you as you bow quickly.

“Thank you for seeing me.”

You are very aware of your lackluster clothing and your flour dusted shoes.

“Azriel tells me you had a wonderful time in the Day Court.”

“Yes High Lord…”

“Rhys and Feyre please.”

You nod, already knowing there’s no way in hell you’ll call them that.

“Do you need our help moving,” Feyre asks softly.

“Actually…I would like to stay.”

Both of their eyebrows raise and they look at one another. Feyre turns back to you with a small smile that makes you fidget.

“But…”

You take a deep breath and steel yourself.

“I would like to redo the artisan quarter that perished after the attack and include architectural advances on the buildings that I learned from Day Court. I could refinance my bakery and…”

Rhys holds up a hand and you go silent, already preparing for the refusal. 

“It is done. We will supply everything.”

“But…”

Feyre stands and slowly places her hands on your shoulders, smiling down at you.

“You are doing us, this city, a favor. The least we can do is provide the supplies and workers. Make a list for us and we will send someone to retrieve it so you can start as soon as you are ready.”

A few more words and agreement are spoken and you walk numbly out of the Riverhouse and back toward your own home. You can feel his presence above you from the tight pull in your chest, but you don’t have the energy to acknowledge him tonight. Not after the high amount of anxiety you had and the long trip from yesterday. Now it’s time to rest and prepare.

Rita’s is busy the next few nights so it leaves you very little time to stress over your next endeavor. Rita was ecstatic for you once telling her the news. Even now, she seems to be in better spirits than before and swings around the bar to go help the inner circle once more. You actively avoid them as Nesta is not with them tonight.

“You should take off early, maybe hang around for a drink.”

You jump as a male speaks from your left side and you give him a small smile.

“Rita would throttle me.”

He chuckles and sips on a glass of wine, very odd for the club atmosphere tonight.

“Haven’t seen you around before.”

His golden hair is a clear indication he likely is not from here and his sea foam eyes just back that theory up more.

“Summer court, just traveling.”

You nod and let him tell you a few stories of his home court, capturing a few chuckles as he does so. You still tend the bar, but end up going back over to his section for the idle chatter.

“So which one is yours.”

He looks around the bar, expectantly.

“What do you mean?”

“Which male here is yours? I know I wouldn’t let you out of my sight if you were mine.”

You scoff and clean a glass.

“None.”

His grin is almost feral and you pause at his expression.

“Let me take you back to my hotel then.”

You look him up and down, heart pounding. He’s handsome, charming, and even not from this court. What could it harm?

“Sure. I get off at two. Meet me by the side door.”

He grins, throws back the rest of his wine and rises from his seat.

“It’s a date.”

You should’ve known it was too good to be true. You stand at the side door for an hour being given up and walking yourself home, eyes burning with frustrated tears that you refuse to let fall. How could you be so stupid? Thinking a man of his caliber would be interested in you. 

You round a corner and knock into someone. You jump and look up into Azriel’s face, mostly hidden by the shadows. He looks over your face and frowns.

“He doesn’t deserve you.”

Anger roils through you and your hand flies out, slapping him across the face. You stand just as stunned, hand pounding as Azriel’s head turns back to you, eyes glowing in the dark.

“How dare you interfere.”

“How dare I?”

He advances and you quickly back up until your back is against one of the brick walls, eyes closing and turning your face away from him. You feel his body heat advance and then a rough, calloused hand takes your jaw and wills you to look him in the face. Centimeters are between you two.

“How dare you flirt with every male that you find remotely attractive. How dare you stay in this city and not expect me to keep you safe. How dare you for being so ignorantly clueless that you have no idea half the population of Rita’s pines for you. If I didn't follow you home every night, at least three others would.”

“Then it would be my choice.”

He growls and grabs a fistful of your hair, tilting your face to mirror his lowered one. 

“Say that again.”

The shadows swirl around you both, creating a cloak against the rest of the world. His eyes sear into yours and you know you’ve lost this round, whatever it is. You finally drop your eyes in submission and he growls again, crushing his lips to yours.

You would expect him to be quiet, gentle, but he is everything but. His strong, lean body curls around yours and he quickly lifts you up, wrapping your legs around his waist.

 Teeth clash, tongues meet and groans erupt from you both. You’ve only been kissed once and this is nothing in comparison. This is lust.

You two finally break apart and he keeps his hold on your jaw as he scents you, trailing his nose down your neck and back up.

“I can smell your arousal. Let them all know you’re mine.”

You want to balk at the statement, but then one his large hand is under your shirt, playing with your waistband and you can’t think of anything else.

All you can do is nod.

Your leggings are slowly infiltrated and Azriel runs a long finger up and down your slit, growling at the wetness he finds.

“You can hate me all you want, but even your body knows what it needs.”

He sinks a finger inside your core and you mewl in pleasure, praying the shadows keep you quiet even in the abandoned alleyway. When another one joins you throw your neck back and whine as he nips at your collarbones.

“That’s right baby, let go for me.”

A burning starts in your toes and just when you think you’re going to combust with his rhythm a wave of ecstasy flows through you and your body goes limp. After a few moments reality comes back and you watch dazed as Azriel extracts his fingers, balancing you on a meaty thigh and slowly licks them clean.

It’s diabolical.