THE POSSIBILITY OF PAIN AND SEIZURE.

I see a lot of readings of deltarune that analyze how the work deals with gender but there is an element of racial coding (most likely unintentional but still very much there! especially if you have grown surrounded by this sort of stuff) and I'm so insane about the intersection of race and gender when it comes to deltarune and how the fandom has reacted to it

BEFORE WE START THE ESSAY DISCLAIMER:

This essay is not about people's race headcanons, you can draw these girls as whatever race you want, this is just my perspective and some of my media analysis knowledge being put to the test, if you disagree with me, that's fine, and have a good day.

Sooooo, noelle right?

The blonde deer girl from a well off family with a parent in a position of power

Not only that, but also we all agree that Noelle is a play on the trope of the damsel in distress, right? Berdly literally calls her one.

Now, what do you think when you think of damsel in distress?

Personally I think of Ann Darrow from the original King Kong, you know, that white petit blonde lady that king kong carries around? Even if you never watched that film you know her, with the film having been referenced across all media for over 90 years now

Now Noelle is not a direct reference to Ann, but she and Ann are pulling from the same character archetype, one that has unfortunately been steeped in racist ideals for a long while now, not just misogynistic!

The damsel is a woman, because women were often robbed of their agency, but specifically a white woman, a blonde woman, because the white woman was often seen as the perfect victim, a perfect innocent. In film, where the viewer was historically presumed a white male (this is what the concept of the male gaze refers to) the white damsel is assumed to inspire righteous anger at the white woman (who is treated like the white mans property) being threatened.

Its misogynistic yes, but racist as well. By having Noelle embody this archetype, toby is calling back to that racist history whether he intends to or not

Its then so interesting to me that Noelle's character arc, both in the normal route and in the snowgrave route, is about coming to understand that she, despite her and others assumptions about her, is not as weak and frail as they all assume and in fact holds much more power than she first thought

In the normal route this power is used for good, when she finally stands up to queen and in the snowgrave route, that power is used for ill, when killing a large number of the dark world's inhabitants (which, due to being objects personified puts them in a lower position of power than the light world's inhabitants(this is outright stated with ralsei saying that the dark exists to serve the light)) and Berdly.

It then can be argued that this characterization of Noelle dispels both the misogynistic AND the racist roots of the damsel in distress trope. Because despite how historically media presented white women as perfect victims they weren't, for one they like all human beings have agency, and two they had by virtue o their race more power than large swatches of people, power used for good and ill.

Likewise, regardless of how much the people around her tries to undermine it, Noelle still has agency, she still makes choices both for good and for ill.

(I really hope it doesn't sound like I'm victim blaming Noelle for the weird route, she's not at fault for being manipulated by a being beyond her comprehension, I'm just saying, as a person who has harmed others under the influence of an abusive relationship, understanding that you can always make choices is the first step to escape that cycle, even if they're small choices its a good first step of reclaiming your agency)

Do I think this was intended? Like I said probably not, but just like you can do queer readings of media where the creator never intended such a reading so can I do a reading of race as presented in deltarune despite it being not intended

And it frustrates me a little bit how many people call noelle deltarune's quintessential girl without thinking about the racist roots of the western definition of a girl

Now on the surface susie's racial coding seems much less apparent, the bully archetype has not been racially coded the same way the damsel archetype has been, but... there are... *things* about her

The way monster kid has never seen her beat anyone up but still presumes violence from her

The way that rudin goes "whoa you tamed the beast, you even taught it how to talk!" when they see her hanging out with the rest of the party near the end of chapter 1

The way she has been ostracized by the community because of this perceived threat she suppousedly poses

The way she is assumed to be tougher and how she plays into it

How she plays into this persona by using her physical features like her teeth

How noelle falls in love with this tough persona

How insecure susie seems with her body, hiding her tail

The way her hair seems messy like she doesnt know how to take care of it

How she seems surprised at toriel having ginger bread monster cookie cutters

The way she likes kaiju movies and imagines what it would be like to be 'susiezilla' (hey remember the reference to king kong earlier in the essay?)

The way rudy jokingly threatens her if she hurts noelle

"like doctors even get me!"

Like if you're white this probably doesn't mean much to you, but if you're brown!... there is a chance this still doesn't mean much to you which is far tbh BUT IF YOURE LIKE ME YOULL COME BACK FROM A LONG PAINFUL DAY OF DELIVERING NEWSPAPERS THAT YOU WONT EVEN GET PAID FOR (long story) AND THEN BURST INTO TEARS BECAUSE OH GOD SHES JUST LIKE ME AS A KID

Just the way everyone expects the worst of her, like she can't do anything right, and they don't even seem to have any reason for it

I'm not saying susie has never done harm she has, she definitely has with kris, but people don't treat her like this because of that (considering people seemingly werent aware of her bullying them), they simply do so because of their PERCEPTION of her

So much of deltarune is just this, people judging others for what they perceive them as rather than actually getting to know them

But it feels oddly.. racially motivated (metaphorically speaking) towards susie because of how much of that is based on appearances? and how regular social awkwardness like that incident with her hitting the ball too hard is seen as her being aggressive

Being treated like you're more aggressive or moody, being treated like you're dangerous, being treated like you're uniquely more tough is the brown kid experience (and the trans girl experience which is why I have seen a few trans girl susie posts and fics around)

Speaking of trans girls, what do trans girls and brown girls have in common?

Being denied what the people in power deem womanhood

With trans girls this is because of their assigned gender

But with brown girls its because girlhood and womanhood in the west are concepts based on the white notions of those gender expressions, and therefore by virtue of race brown and black women can never reach it

(Of course, they're still expected conform to it and therefore punished when they cant)

That's what makes susie being (metaphorically) brown and (literally) butch so interesting to me

Because what does taking on a masculine presentation mean for you when you grew up being told you're not really a girl by virtue of your race?

How much is this you and how much is it peoples expectations of you?

Do your choices really matter?

(Of course you can still be brown and butch, I'm brown and a trans man, but that tension of nature vs nurture remains especially when you're young and you still don't have confidence in your identity)

Anyway, think for a second, why is noelle seen as uniquely more fragile while susie is seen as uniquely more dangerous? despite being both kids of the same age? is it because these things are true? NO! ITS BECAUSE OF HOW THEY ARE PERCEIVED

And if enough people perceive you a certain way you’ll begin to believe it, and you’ll begin to play into it.

Which is, if you ever been a brown girl who grew up seeing how white girls be treated differently, strikes very close to home

So, then, its interesting to me that while susie has learnt that she doesn't need to wield this persona that has been projected upon her to protect herself from everyone and everything, and that while she has let people in, she... hasn't fully let go of this persona yet

no, instead of using this persona to push people away she instead is using it to protect her friends, instead of being the violent tormentor she is the dark knight of the party

Except, I don't think it's gonna stay that way

Now I wont say that susie isnt strong, she is wonderful and she is so so strong, and she's going to fight tooth and nail to protect her friends, but she's not uniquely stronger than her friends, and despite what so many fanfics on ao3 might tell you she is not uniquely equipped to be her friends' protector

Again this plays into the idea that brown girls are somehow stronger and more capable than their white peers, when in reality they just grew up with more weight on their shoulders due to various factors

I think that like how noelle's character arc was about understanding that she wields far more power than she thinks, susie will have to come to understand that she's not as tough as she thinks

not in a way that would strip her of her agency, this is not about a loss of power, no, this is about her understanding that she can be vulnerable and that she is jus a kid like all of her friends and that she sometimes needs help, because despite her arc in chapter 1, I don't think she fully understands that yet

(Like seriously her reaction to being healed by ralsei is immediately wondering how she can do it herself like seriously girl you don't need to be a one man army)

Its the only way for suselle to win, for them to come to see each other as equals, not damsel and knight.

(Which they probably will, noelle crushing on susie's persona isnt necessarily a bad thing because a lot of crushes *start out* like that, but it seems like noelle is putting the effort to get to know the person susie actually is, as symbolized by noelle finding out about susie's tail.

I just feel this is important to reiterate because the way the fandom treats the ship is a bit one sided, portraying susie supporting and getting to know noelle but not so much the other way round? Granted i might be generalizing but thats how i have seen things play out in my corner of the internet)

And on a final note, i know im writing this essay from the perspective of being brown, but there are, most likely, going to be people who are also brown and disagree with me, that's okay and to be expected, we're not a monolith