falchion wielded

a mix of human and vampire dialogue. change pronouncs as you see fit!

❝I can’t turn into a bat, now stop asking.❞

❝What happened to all of the O positive bags in the fridge?❞

❝I’m actually a vegetarian vampire.❞

❝Vampires have hard-ons longer.❞

❝I’m ____ years old.❞

❝Did you really think holy water was going to work on me?❞

❝Did you try to stake me in my sleep?❞

❝You have no idea how many lives I’ve lived.❞

❝Your blood tastes so good.❞

❝I actually sleep in a bed, not a coffin.❞

❝I can’t live another century without you.❞

❝You’re the first human I’ve loved in hundreds of years.❞

❝If there’s anyone I want to stake me it’s you.❞

❝You call that a stake?❞

❝I thought that if I turned you we could be together forever.❞

❝You really don’t know anything about vampires, do you?❞     

❝I’m a vampire. Duh.❞

❝Vampire hunters have been after me for years.❞ 

❝I’ll rip out your heart and drink it look a juice box.❞   

❝I’m not going to turn you.❞

❝I want you to turn me.❞

❝Are you saying that my blood is gross?❞

❝He screamed at me that he was a creature of the night and tried to drink my blood.❞

❝My vampire boyfriend is going to kick your ass!❞

❝I’m going to drag your ass out into the sun!❞

❝Bite me. I want you to do it.❞

❝I can’t believe the person I fell in love with is a vampire.❞

❝You could have killed me!❞

❝What special powers do you have?❞

❝Please don’t eat me.❞

❝Do you really think you’ll live forever?❞     

❝I’ve been hunting your kind for years.❞

❝You healed that fast?❞

❝You turned me against my will!❞

❝Did you think turning me would make me love you forever?❞    

❝I’m so hungry right now.❞

❝I’m so hungry I could eat a horse…or you.❞

❝I like biting that special place right between the thighs.❞

❝I just want to bite you all over.❞

❝How badly does biting someone hurt?❞        

❝Can’t we feed on each other?❞