For Never and Ever.

One of the funnier parts of reading older Ultramarines books is that the blueberries frequently curse in their dad's name. At the time they were written it wouldn't have been notable, but as a present-day reader I giggle every time. You just know that some poor bastard yelled "Guilliman's balls!" without thinking and then tried really really hard not to look at Actual Guilliman fighting right beside him

Update: I am reading Knights of Macragge, which takes place after Guilliman’s return, and the Ultramarines are still casually swearing in his name. Brilliant. I choose to believe this means that every time something Goes Wrong in his vicinity, Guilliman must endure his sons shamelessly yelling, “Guilliman’s balls!” and just kinda puts up with it.

Learning that the Dark Angels, at least, swear by their dad's balls, puts new wind in my sails over this. I am taking that as confirmation that all space marines swear by daddy's genitalia thank you and good night

Vulkans Left Nut confirmed as a salamander swear

EVERYTHING GOT BETTER

@angronius

Due to an ask that @ask-ciaphas-cain received, I’ve decided it’s very important we examine the top and bottom dynamic within the general ranks of the Adeptus Astartes Now, who are the biggest bottoms within the Space Marines, you ask? The answer is, clearly, Biker Marines and their variants, who are inexplicably drawn to riding powerful, thrumming devices at high speeds whilst screaming loudly. Sadly, many of them are in denial, and will say that’s it’s not gay, it’s just bros riding it rough with other bros, but the truth of their condition speaks louder than both words and the mighty humming of their beloved toys At the other end of the spectrum, one would be forgiven for thinking that Chapter Masters and Terminators are natural tops due to their armour sizing and general presentation. This is, obviously, untrue, as Page 16, Paragraph 3 of the Imperial Top Index clearly highlights that any top who needs to loudly display that they are a top is, indeed, no top at all Chaplains are incredibly competent tops, obviously, who cater to the BDSM-inclined bottoms among the Chapters. They must be given full credit for walking the line between Forgive me, Father, I have sinned and Punish me, Daddy, I’ve been naughty with a level of finesse that can only be regarded as professional Who, though, are the most powerful, the most skilled and the most effective of tops? Look no further than the chapter Apothecaries. Dressed without the need for grandeur, quietly competent at their roles, and possessing incredible levels of anatomical and medical knowledge, the Apothecaries are the unsung top heroes of the Astartes who attend to the needs of all chapter bottoms with equal amounts of duty and dedication. The sheer might of an Apothecary’s topping prowess can best be surmised via a quote from Battle Brother Lyons of the Dark Angels chapter; “I don’t know what Apothecary Hamon did, but he only used two fingers and some medical grade lubricant and I went blind for four hours.”