Exposition Has To Go Somewhere

jessica rabbit is a salazzle and bandit is a salandit.

jessica: dana, come here. dana: ...but you don’t like me. jessica: i’ve also had to explain this a hundred times and don’t want to deal with it again. dana: of course.  throw me your crap.  i got it. paul: .... dana: so what is it she doesn’t want to explain? paul: why those two - diane and bedelia - look alike. dana: ah. dana: -turns to jessica, whispers- are you sure it’s okay to have this conversation with him? jessica: of course.  it’s not like he’s going to be-- dana: -ignores, turns back to paul- so, basically, they come from the same idea. paul: she said that. dana: right.  basically bandit took a bunch of her ideas from bedelia and crafted them into a uniquely separate character - that’s diane. paul: so they look the same because they’re the same person. dana: well, not really.  bedelia is much more standoffish.  diane’s better at people skills. jessica: there are better examples. dana: yeah, take jess here.  see that redhead over there with diane? paul: yes. dana: okay, that’s the other jess.  used to be part of the girl sitting next to you. paul: ...are there other versions of me? jessica: they aren’t versions, they’re-- dana: i don’t think so.  not like that.  but all of us have bits and pieces that are like others. dana: -squints- you know, if you had someone a lot like you, it’d be thanatos. paul: who? jessica: he isn’t on here. dana: he’s not...going to be on here. paul: but he’s like me. dana: not quite.  besides, i think bandit’s trying to rehabilitate you. paul: but not thanatos. dana: he’s a long story.  i don’t even know all of it, do you, jess? jessica: no.  i doubt any of us here do.  you’d be the closest. dana: or one of the other oc’s.  but i don’t think we’ve had any true contact with him.  not out here. paul: what is he? jessica: you’re smart.  you should be able to figure that out by his name. paul: thanatos? jessica: yes. dana: or you could always ask bandit. paul: .... dana: not very helpful, are we? paul: no.

paul: -shifts in seat- and the blondes? jessica: which ones? paul: the one with the glasses and the one who looks just like her. jessica: the one with the glasses is dee.  she’d probably prefer you to call her diane or dr. daniel, but we all universally call her dee. paul: -nods once- jessica: the one who looks like her is bedelia.  she doesn’t talk much. paul: they look familiar. jessica: might look like someone you know.  from your canon. paul: canon? jessica: your story. paul: ...are they sisters? jessica: no.  they’re from the same idea. paul: .... jessica: she didn’t teach you anything, did she. paul: no.

paul: so.  who is that? jessica: which one? paul: the brunette. jessica: the one with the purple eyes or the one with the face? paul: ...both. jessica: purple eyes is meg.  she’s immortal.  ish. paul: -makes mental note- jessica: the face is isabel maru. paul: what happened to her? jessica: she plays with poison gas.  tested some of it on herself to make sure it hurt. paul: .... jessica: no, you can’t kill them. paul: i wasn’t planning on killing anyone. jessica: oh.  well.

jessica: -sits down next to paul- paul: -eyes her uncomfortably- jessica: i hear you hate everyone, too. paul: i...don’t.  hate everybody. jessica: good.  that makes things easier.

bandit: so, now that you’re awake and talking, you can meet everybody! paul: -sits in circle silently, watches- bandit: you should meet people. paul: -_- chara: -sidles up-  so i hear you like to kill people-- bandit: NOT YOU.

bandit: paul why do you like this song.  you don’t like cats. paul: i don’t like this song. bandit: but you always wake up when you hear it. paul: because it’s so loud. bandit: .... paul: -shifts uncomfortably- bandit: YOU’RE FINALLY TALKING TO ME! bandit: -hugs- paul: .... bandit: you look uncomfortable. paul: i feel uncomfortable. bandit: oh.  sorry.

okay - question: if bandit has an umbreon, and jessica has a scizor, what other pokemon should the other characters get?

jessica: oh, yes, and one more question. bandit: jess, i need to do stuff today. jessica: what’s your house? bandit: . . . . jessica: that bad? bandit: if i were sorted as an adult, i’d like to think i’m hufflepuff, but that is incorrect.  half of the time pottermore puts me in slytherin, but i’ve got no ambition.  most honestly, i would be in ravenclaw. jessica: you-- bandit: don’t.  say it.