♡

I had no idea people have become THIS risk averse.

got home drfunk left my phone at my friends place and got a lyft homee from a b eautiful man

The limitations of human capacity, life and experience are so humbling.

I think at the end of the day I love and trust myself. It’s just that I am bored, have misdirected energy, am not in the season of experimentation what I once cared about so I feel like there’s no closure and or skill development, but im also lonely and want love/comfort. Compulsion prevents exploration; accelerates my survival and functionality. But it hurts bc the soul needs something. Exploration heals the soul. Im blocked. There’s a lesson. It’s uncomfortable. Weird limbo. I don’t think properly.

Flash backs, reflections…… what is difference between criticism, growth, introspection, and action. A marriage between them all. Living outside of oneself. Involved with the world around you. Married into it all.

I’m locked in, she’s in a process of transforming, she’s emotional, heavy baggage, betrayal and let down. Reframing things where I don’t hurt myself. Gotta work ten times harder and my bandwidth is smaller but I’ll snap out of it and get to work. It’s a slower timeline. Exhaustion comes easy. Everything is a lot. I can’t focus. It’s a form of avoidance. I’ll sit with the shameeeee. I don’t want to. Avoiding saying what I really feel bc I did a lot of work to be in this current emotional space (much better than before)

Didn’t realize how sensual and horny comics can be. Batman and Catwoman interactions are so steamy I love the tension lmao

I’m dropping people like flies now. Thank GOD

I be living like I’m trying to prove something. Girl… stand up. Slowly lmao

You never think you’d get caught up in weird interpersonal conflict and micro moments of disrespect randomly but apparently here we are.

You know what ima go with the algorithms telling me about fixing my attachment styles in relation to my own religiosity. Like Zzz tea

I have to use my vibrator. That will heal me