Evan Walsh

moo

check it out. (i fold myself up into an origami crane. you unfold the crane and see the words “YOU JUST KILLED ME” written on the inside)

i like elephant seals IN THEORY cos they look so goofy but every time i watch any documentary about them all they do is fuck and fight extremely graphically and disgustingly to the death so i’m deeply afraid of them

I just googled “why do elephant seals fight” and got a video of one bashing himself in slow, rhythmic, dead-eyed crashes against a truck only slightly larger than itself while said owner just stood to the side, a defeated, perplexed look on his face

Pretty sure this is Homer the elephant seal from New Zealand. He’s not fighting that car he’s fucking it. It’s how he got famous, he became a menace to a town after fucking a bunch of cars. He also fucked a restaurant’s power box and caused a blackout. Absolute madman.

Ah, wonderful! Now I’m even more terrified.

mom making fun of me bc she heard me talking to my cat. i was asking him if he had permission to be baby and asking for his permit and now i’m being bullied  

this little man does NOT have a baby license 

thank you for come to brazil

first corn i see tonight

I think about this tiktok every day.