E.

I really don't know how to write about you, Miki. It's been painful and I'm still longing for you.

Maybe i’ll just write TO you.

It was the Easter Sunday, April 5, when I bled until I lost you. I still couldn't bear to write about happened. Although we were able to share the news to our neighbors, your titas and titos, already. Other than them, we couldn't tell our families how we lost you, especially they were unaware of the pregnancy.

But let me tell you a little story about what happened before our the dreadful day, Miki.

We found out about you in Japan. Then had my ultrasound a few weeks after. You had a strong heartbeat, 100bpm.

This was our only picture of you.

I was thrilled to do this again for the 2nd time that I told my boss and colleagues about you asap. I excitedly talked about you and when I’ll be having my maternity leave.

We also celebrated your dad’s 28th birthday.

Actually, we became completely complacent about activities during that 1st trimester. We even had your aunts and grandparents visit here. Yet, we kept your existence sacred for ourselves.

We also prayed and happily thanked the heavens for you.

And the day before we lost you, your dada bought mommy a sofabed as part of our preparation. Because this time, our home has stairs so I need to have a bed downstairs. Akalain mo ‘yun, anak? After 4 years of marriage, dada finally gave in in buying a sofa just for you. So, thank you 😉

But yeah, I got super exhausted that I bled. Thankfully, I didn’t need a D&C procedure, I was just prescribed pills to completely bleed everything out.

The whole process was a challenge. I cried for days until I had to learn how to deal with the grief. I was also reminded that your Ate Dara is still a baby and still needs undivided attention from mommy. So, the past few weeks gave me time to rest from work, to take care of her and myself.

I'll be concluding my maternity leave in a few days. And you're still in my mind and heart, Miki anak. You were supposed to be with us on November 21st, a little over a month before your Ate Dara's 2nd birthday.

I know there were lapses on our end. I could have taken better care of you and my health, but I think we were simply too confident that we would have more time with you. Still, I am sorry.

And thank you for choosing us to be your parents, even for only a little while. I hold on to the hope that someday, on the other side, I’ll finally get to hold you properly.

While my pregnancy with you was unplanned, we still prayed for you. Your name was prepared long ago:

If you were a Girl: : Mikhaila (Goddess-like) Serene (peaceful) If you were a boy: Mikhail (God-like) Chase (i’m trying)

You were just a faint line on that pregnancy test. Then a little life we saw once on an ultrasound screen. After that, only silence. But you were here. And you mattered. As our family is sealed in the eternities, I hope our Father in Heaven will let me take care of you someday.

In recent sayings, you will forever be our 'Multo'. We miss you, Miki. We love you very dearly. Please watch over us.

Sapporo part 2 – Surprises, Mishaps, Miki.

Asari gone wrong?

Soooo, as I said, Asari station is literally just a station. Nothing else but a good view..

.... and a vending machine hahaha. If you're looking for Adhara, she's asleep during all these, as usual. We tried to stay here for a long time but it was super cold that we had nose bleeds.

and my monthly period still hasn't arrived...... So, we went back to the hotel after eating and it went positive.... Surprise.

Moerenuma Park.

The next day, our last day, we had a planned professional photo shoot at Moerenuma Park, courtesy of EliaVisuals

We were over the top that we were about to become a family of four, and we get to celebrate it in Sapporo. Link to the online photo album is above.

Miki, we love you always.

Going home... or not?

After the photoshoot, we went to eat at Ichiran again before leaving for the airport.

When we got to Sapporo airport, we had to remove our winter clothes and repack again before checking in. Josh even saw this board and wrote something. Little did we know that it was the start of chaos.

Unfortunately, we arrived 2 mins late in the check-in counters and got left by the plane. I don't want to detail what happened, as my heart is getting heavy just trying to revisit the memory.

To summarize, we had to buy new tickets for the next trip back to Manila, which is not a direct flight. We had to do a connecting flight: Sapporo-Haneda-Manila. Josh became a superhero trying to make everything work while I try not to panic as a pregnant woman.

Our Japan trip ended with a Mishap, but we still enjoyed it overall. I'm glad we get to have this winter experience with Adhara.

I'm writing this on 27th May, a few weeks since the Oil Crisis happened bc of the war, so plane tickets are soooo expensive these days. Hopefully, we get to go back.

Sapporo. (pt 1)

I think every Asian girl who grew up knowing only two seasons, dry and rainy, has at some point dreamed of winter. Or autumn. Or simply watching the world change colours with the seasons. You know, something that once only seemed to exist in films.

And now, through a privileged circumstance and heaven’s help, we finally experienced snow for the first time.

En Route Tokyo.

Before going to Sapporo, we need to spend the night in Tokyo. After landing, we were welcomed by a breeze of 7°C! 🥶

Josh being the prideful man that he is, didn't wear any layers because there's no snow and we've already experienced the same temperature in Hongkong. Meanwhile, look at my little bear 🐻

En Route Sapporo.

We booked the first domestic trip to Sapporo at 6:35am. As experienced travelers, we usually go to the airport at 2 hours before. The hotel has a free shuttle to airport starting 5:30am but we chose to book a taxi.

Once we're there at 4am, the airport lights were off, as if we're closed. We we surprised since we also see a few passengers sleeping on the floors. Apparently, domestic airport opens at 5am and trips are REALLY on time. I mean, Japan right?

On the self check-in monitors, we really had to wait at 5am on the dot. As for the gates, they also opened at 5:30am on the dot. Oh, Japan. You amaze us every dang time.

On the flight, we were so sleepy that we didn't see Mt Fuji. It's a shame since we picked the good seats.

Anyway, Since it's the first week slash second-ish week of March, we're quite worried that snow has already melted. But Sapporo really said be patient because we were welcomed with a snowfall and -1°C!!

Sapporo.

Look how magical this is ❄️

Our Dara in her natural aircon habitat, really slept most of the trip. Sapporo is really Elsa's territory. But we're not complaining! We even had ice cream hehe

Sapporo Temple.

I know I wrote in my previous blog entries that Davao Temple is the most beautiful temple we've seen so far, but we thought wrong. Because Sapporo temple is.

Unfortunately, the temple was closed during our trip so we could only take pictures. We only stayed I think for an hour or less because we were really freezingggg. More reason to come back soon!

Asari - Snowy seaside ❄️🌊

We also had to go to the beautiful and quiet Asari station! It was beautiful as there's snow beside the sea. Though it was really a quiet place because it was just literally a station on the way to Otaru station, which we were supposed to go to.

Ah, yes. One of our unplanned and spontaneous trips. And it's quite hard to forget because of the reason why we came here.

During our first time applying for japan visa in 2025, it was pretty chill and inexpensive. We just booked an available slot online with VFS and did the normal processing in their Makati branch.

Why am I telling you about Japan visa when this entry is about Davao? Well..... this 2026, we have another Japan trip to Sapporo! And Winter season! Now, we got a single entry (SE) visa the first time to so we have to apply for a new one, hoping for a multiple entry (ME) this time.

Unfortunately, since we're visiting on a touristy season, it was HELL booking for an appointment slot. The embassy's recommendation was to book an appointment for 3 months ahead of your trip. The catch is, everyone's doing that. So, everyone's trying to get even the Premium slot which is like 4k+ per person compared to the 500-ish pesos regular slot. Out of desperation, I made the call to VFS and ask if there's a slot in their Davao branch... to which they said yes. Thankfully, Josh and I wanted to go to Davao before we even had Dara, so, that's that.

Enroute to Davao.

Running on little to no sleep, we're off to Davao. I sometimes hate red eye flights 😴🥱

Davao.

We don't really have any planned itinerary. We stayed there for 4 days, but Josh has to work because he also got a premium client a week before so he really needs to work during this trip.

We stayed in an airbnb which is a first time for us, because we usually just book hotels. But since we can't find a cheap decent hotel, we resorted to an airbnb. It went really well actually, it was cozy and homey. Even gave us a vision on how we want our apartment business to look like. Anyway....

4th Anniversary.

Have I mentioned we traveled on the day of our 4th wedding anniversary? Yes, it was February 10! So, this was the only day we had an itinerary.

Davao Philippines Temple

First order of business: temple.

It wasn't open yet, but the open house happened a few weeks after, so we can only take pictures outside. Then we met the head contractor (I forgot his name! huhu) and invited us to come inside the grounds 👀

It was bawal, but we went anyway since we were invited by the head contractor. We just can't take pictures, obviously. The temple was gorgeous!!! Everything looked exquisite and fancy. We thought this was the prettiest temple we've seen. They also have a meetinghouse behind it. Can't wait to be back once it's operating.

Anniversary Dinner.

We went to Capri's Restaurant after and had a little fancy fine dining for our anniversary. I love these kinds of dinners with my husband 💌

PS. If you ask what's the doneness of my hubs' steak, look at the first picture above 🤭

Museums, Parks, etc.

The next days went by a little in between of fast and slow. We just went to the nearest pasalubong centers, museums, parks, and malls. Most of the time, we're just ordering from Grab since Josh is working.

Waiting Game.

This Davao trip was one for the books, really. It was unplanned and fun. VFS appointment went smoothly as well. We went home the night of valentine's day. Here's a few pictures in Alabang temple just for a little commercial. Can also be called the Visa waiting game pictures hehe.

Japan Visa.

As you know, we're going to Sapporo, Japan on March 9 to 12. We submitted our visa application on Feb 12. It was a nervewrecking waiting game because as I said, the timeline of processing is quite long because of the season + we processed it outside Manila. So after 2 weeks, we finally received it!

And guess what?? Multiple entryyyyy! See you soon, Japan!

It's May 13 2026 and I've just finished writing about the memorable 2025 that we had.

Since we're nearing the end of this year's first half, a lot of things have already happened, both the good and the bad. And It's quite a challenge to write about it. Thus, the title of this blog.

Anyway, this year was welcomed with high hopes, as usual.

With a dedication to be more worthy to enter the temple, and to do it as a family.

As I write this, I'm hoping the impossible - Rewriting the year. You know, making little tweaks.

Nonetheless, I know things happen for a reason. Though not known yet, I know the Lord prepares us for even greater things. Just keep swimming, keep believing, and be more hoping.

Francisco-Sobrevilla Wedding

Adding this as my 2025 highlight because one of my closest cousins, Ate Yvette, is finally married!

Birthday Plate.

With my colleagues, I painted a birthday plate for my baby Dioney 💌

Quezon.

I think the last time we watched a movie was Barbenheimer 2023. I'm glad we had the chance to do a quick movie date again. This time, we watched Quezon!

Putting this in just because :)

Bicol.

One of the trips I kinda dreaded and somehow enjoyed. We traveled with the Brizuelas and welcomed Typhoon Uwan. This was my first typhoon experience in the province. It was dreadful because for the first night, we had a major blackout and there was no signal for a week! It was hell! You know why? Because this was a 2-week trip and I didn't take a work leave for this. Needless to say I was forced to file work leaves for a few days because there was no signal at all. We had to go to Legazpi, the nearby city, by renting a car and checking in a hotel hoping they both have signal and power, so Josh could work. Jokes on us, they only rely in generator. UGH. Imagine the expenses. We kinda enjoyed the roadtrips, though, haha.

hotels and roadtrips

We then went back and forth to Tabaco centro to have our gadgets charged, rely on our mobile data so we can work. Thankfully, a coworking space was available after the first week. Then before the end of our trip, power and signal came back so we kinda survived work. Never again, honestly.

The view, though.... magical 🌇

Villa Ballan!!

After 15 months, we finally have our own lot!! Remember the Adventure of the Lifetime post? That was about this lot purchase. We didn't know I was already pregnant with Dara when we started this journey, but here we are. Hopefully we get to build our home here soon.

Our Princess is finally ONE! 1️⃣

And the most awaited event, our princess finally turning one.

Adhara Dione, your birth came the most beautiful expansion of our love. So, we decided to celebrate in the very city where love can be felt all around.

Daddy and I are very lucky to have you.

1st & 3rd photo: us preparing her 'friends' wait for her to come out 2nd photo: having her blow her cake at exactly 12mn

There's so much more that could be highlighted, but I could go on and on and make more parts. We had the

Alabang Temple dedication

Dara getting her passport

seeing Ysa again

Sunday gatherings with neighbors (sushi night, bbq night, etc)

our mundane grocery and steak dates

the never ending Tondo visits

me coming back after my maternity leave

taking the MPM comprehensive exam

ofc, Dara's growth milestones

I wish I could make this online journal more detailed so it could be more memorable to look back on. But with the lack of time and energy, I'm still honestly grateful I get to document all this about my little family. It's been a rollercoaster, same with each year that has passed, and yet I couldn't celebrate life even more.

Thank you, 2025.

I've been contemplating as to how I'll start with my 2025 recap. It's already May 2026 and I'm only writing this now. I have soooo many back (B)logs! As a first time mom, it's been a struggle to do the things I used to do so conveniently. The demands of a growing baby and my body adjusting fully occupied me.

Anyway, let's try to do this now.

Adhara Dione's Blessing.

Both our families gathered to have our little princess receive her first blessing from dada. It was honestly heartfelt and beautiful.

Moving to the greater Manila.

After living in Taguig for 3 years, it was time to leave this humble abode. We've had so many memories here that it was quite hard to imagine we finally left. As of writing, we're now in Sta Rosa, Laguna for 1 year and a month.

First Travel - Singapore 🇸🇬

I attended an HR conference in SG so took a little advantage to make it a short family getaway. Dara's first international trip! She's not a fan of the water and its sound yet. She cries when we dip her feet haha

Last time we visited SG, it was in 2023 and it was just Josh and I. So imagine our happiness when we got a chance to come back as a family of three?!

2023 vs. 2025

Neighbors Trip!

I honestly don't remember where we went, but it was quite a roadtrip adventure - with a 1 year-old and a preggy woman on her kabuwanan. Haha. Unfortunately, still not a fan of the water. Oh, dara haha.

Beyond Coffee!!!

Yes! After bringing Josh here in Beyond Coffee last 2023, we finally get to come back with Dara!!

Second Travel - Japan 🇯🇵

After the tedious visa application process, we've finally set foot on the land of the Rising Sun! It 's our first for us three so it was memorable and very exhausting. The late summer weather isn't helping.

First stop: Tokyo!!!

Second stop: Osaka!!!

Third stop: Kyoto!!!

We have soooo many pictures and videos from this trip, but just head to my instagram hahaha. I'm not sure if I would make a separate Japan post. Oh well.

Josh's Institute and BYU Graduation!

After 6 years, my husband finally graduated from institute and BYU-Idaho for his bachelor's degree! Wohoo!

Photo taken: 16 February 2020.

“Wait until you live under the same roof." "Wait until you have your first baby, and everything will change." "Wait until you reach the 7-year itch."

Blah, blah, blah. Haha. We’ve been together since 2019, and I know it's not that long for some people. Although I agree that so many things have changed since then, let’s continue enjoying these moments. Because for me, I still get excited about spending holidays and occasions with you. I still get ecstatic about celebrating milestones with you. I still grin from ear to ear when asked about our story.

Ikaw at ikaw pa rin palagi, mahal ko. Thank you for making me the happiest wife and momma every day. I’m blessed and grateful to have you and Adhara. Family of 3 on our 3rd year sounds about right.

Happy 3rd wedding anniversary, Dada! 💛

10th January 2025

It’s 5:30pm. I haven’t had any meal since 5am. I’ve been waking up every 2-3 hrs to feed and soothe dara, trying to sleep when she sleeps. I only peed twice the whole time bc I was either asleep or holding it bc I’m carrying her.

5 days before Dara’s 1st month. I look at my side and I see her still asleep. I’m surprised I woke up first before her. time flies. the tiny chunky baby who popped out of my tummy has grown since then. she’s still tiny, but her newborn features is slowly fading away.

And here i am, munching on the 3-day old cucumber from the fridge, trying to absorb everything that has happened the past month. with a c section scar, sore sensitive boobs, and an aching back, i’m still glad dara chose me to be her mom. the amount of uncertainty i feel everytime I struggle to calm her down upsets me. but here she is, lying beside me beautifully and peacefully. as if she never wailed from struggling to poop a few hrs ago.

When they say you’ll never feel such unconditional love until you become a parent, i understand it now. the patience and sacrifices you’ll have to give just to see your child safe and happy? your world will revolve in doing just that.

So… this is what love feels like.

"Anything for my girls."

Joshy, my love, our daddy, I love you. We love you. I thank the heavens every day for allowing me to meet and marry a guy like you. I see you struggling every single day as your body begs for rest. I cannot and won't stop bragging about how you juggle school and multiple jobs because you deserve to be celebrated and acknowledged. Your efforts to work and study, while taking care of me as a struggling pregnant – buying & cooking food, doing groceries by yourself, staying up to wait for online shopping deliveries, building our princess' nursery, etc – will NEVER be overlooked. You are amazing.

Today (like any other day), you faced a hurdle at work. You hugged me and told me you were too exhausted to feel sadness. The only thing you asked me was a glass of milk and cookies because you haven't eaten dinner. My heart broke as I can't even do anything to ease your burdens. I, myself, have been sick for a week now. I cried as I looked at you trying to sleep. You noticed and hugged me. I kept on saying sorry for adding to your burdens as a sick pregnant woman. What you told me broke me even more: "Anything for my girls".

Baby, I love you so much. Thank you for being the strongest rock our family has ever had. You've been giving us so much para sa pangarap, para sa future ng prinsesa natin. Babawi ako/kami once I recover and especially once I give birth.

It was the 20th of August 2024 when we had our Congenital Anomaly Scan (CAS) and our first 3d baby scan. It was so glorious to see our little baby, though a little bit malnourished still as a 21-week and 4-day-old fetus, it was beautiful. We saw how our baby moved, yawned, smiled, and held his/her feet like a gymnast got us in awe. Thankfully, everything was normal at that stage. No complications (yay). As we left the clinic, we were told to come back in a month to do a rescan so the baby's face would be more distinct and developed + we got our little envelope with the gender in it! Ahhh so exciting to open it in Bangkok!

30 August 2024.

📍Bangkok, Thailand

During our baby moon in Thailand, we desperately looked for a cake shop that could bake us a gender reveal cake. Unfortunately, it doesn't look like it's a thing there. So we had to look for an alternative. Josh told me that in front of our hotel was a lemonade stand. They sell flavors like strawberry and blue lemonade, so we thought... why not? After all, we wanted it to be intimate, exciting, and special between us. Nothing grand.

After our dinner, Josh went there and had to do A LOT of Google translating for the seller to explain. Haha! Then she had the drink wrapped so we could do a taste test and guess. Here's what happened 😊👇🏻 (tumblr compressed the video quality 🥲)

Just what we wanted – a baby girl. We were (and still are) over the top! Needless to say, we did some baby clothes shopping the next day at Pratunam Market before we head back to Manila 😉

20 September 2024.

We went back to Hello Baby for our 3d rescan and our last week of 2nd-trimester ultrasound! She is still the same giggly and sleepy gymnast. Only this time, we finally saw how cute her chubby cheeks were (like mommy) and her pointed nose from Daddy! Compared to last time, you can really feel her big movements now. So grateful to see her healthy and makulit.

We are in love. See you soon, our little princess. 👸🏻

Hi, our love! As days and weeks go by, things are getting really REAL. I can feel your strong little kicks every now and then. To be excited is an understatement, my love. Feeling your movements makes all the painful days worth it.

Your dada is also excited! Although he can be very busy and distant at times, please know he loves you very very much. To be honest, he is not in great shape right now. The reality of him finally being a father is setting in, so he is really working extra hard this time which fatigues him. Earlier this morning at 6am in our room, your dada hugged my tummy and talked to you softly for a good 3-5 minutes. I couldn't hear anything except for the whispers of 'I love yous', but I hope you felt that great love, our little one. Your dada is working really hard for you. Fun fact: dada has already added to his shopping cart a remote control car that you can ride in, soon! 😁

Thank you for being such an angel. You've been reminding us to be stronger and better. We are excited to see you in 5 months. We'll be having our babymoon (one with your grandparents and one with just us three) next month. Kapit ka maiigi, okay? We'll be traveling to Thailand and Vietnam, so I hope you'll stay healthy inside my tummy.

I love you, our baby dragon. We love you so so much. We can't wait to see you at our next ultrasound in a few weeks. We'll be knowing your gender as well.

Stay healthy and strong, baby namin!

-Mommy

29 July 2024

I randomly scrolled through my camera roll and Instagram story archives and saw these pictures. Valentine's Day is Josh's favorite holiday/event while mine is Christmas, but that's for another post.

14 February 2020 – We became a couple in the 2nd half of 2019, so this was our first Valentine's Day. We were in a long-distance relationship during that time, so he did a surprise visit! As the picture says, he traveled 10 hours to see me after work. We stayed in the Makati area and had our dinner. We had our temple date the next day then he attended church service with us the following day before coming home. Thank goodness we finally had a date before the Covid lockdown started in March! yikes.

14 February 2021 – Still in an LDR. I wasn't really expecting anything because it's still covid season. Josh was still 10-13 hours away from me, but he still made sure we got to celebrate. It was a Sunday night and as I prepared to sleep, a McDonald's grab delivery arrived, and his sister video-called me using his account because he was singing Wonderful Tonight at an event. Hay, this guy.

14 February 2022 – 4 days after our wedding! Obviously we have been celebrating since then, so we didn't really do anything fancy. We just went to BGC, had a simple dinner, and walked through the night. I remember we were talking so much that time and feeling so grateful since this was the first (of many!) time we're celebrating Valentine's day physically together.

14 February 2023 – We went home to Bicol, his hometown, for the whole week. We planned to do ATV but because he still has work (a freelancer without paid leaves, i know bummer) so we just did 'Netflix and chill'. Why we didn't do anything fancy? Well, because it's 4 days after our wedding anniversary, which happens to be our 1st anniv that time. So, here's the fancy part on a different post 👉🏻 Click here

14 February 2024 – Ahh of course, the latest one. This Wedding Anniversary and Valentine's have been the fanciest date we had. Only because we were in Hongkong. The day started with us getting confused as we redeemed our Macau Ferry Ticket for the next day and literally lost, hungry, and tired during our trip to Nan Lian Garden (somewhere out of the city na). But before that adventure, Josh has been eyeing the blueberry cheesecake from maxim’s cakes for days already and finally bought one in honor of the special day! It was expensive and we were running out of hkd already, but it was worth it! We went to the train station's corner and ate it while standing.

We had a mandatory valentine’s Temple date by mid afternoon 🫶🏻 but had to rush going back to the hostel bc of his client meeting. I think we got out for dinner at around 10pm. Can you imagine how hungry I was?! It was ok because we had Samgyupsal hehe.

My fave part was the after dinner. You know those kdrama moments na hinahatid ng guy ‘yung girl sa bahay at night? Tapos nagkkwentuhan lang sila during the long walk home, tapos kapit na kapit si gurl sa braso ni guy kasi malamig? That was our situation, haha! I remember telling hubs i love those mundane moments.

As if nothing else mattered during that time and it was just the 2 of us.

17 July 2024

i’m at 16 weeks, going 17 in a few days.

tonight’s the first time Josh actually did a small talk with our baby.

Normally, he’ll just rub my baby, put elasticity oil on it, or kiss it. But no talking even if i ask him to. But tonight… he put his head on my upper tummy, rubbed the lower part, and said “hi baby, sorry if busy ako and i distanced myself from you. please know that i love you” then kissed it.