lol still a hoe

⟨ JACOB ELORDI. CIS MALE. HE/HIM. ⟩ though the mist might prevent some from seeing it, IKER BIZCAY is actually a descendent of A P H R O D I T E. it’s still a question of whether or not the TWENTY-THREE year old CLASSICAL LITERATURE MAJOR from GETARIA, SPAIN has taken after their godly parent completely, but the demigod is still known to be quite CULTURED & CYNICAL.

After breaking up with Mia, let's just say that Iker was not having a great time and he decided to take some time off and head back to Spain to think things through. This was supposed to be a two-week trip and to be honest most of the time there he spent it in his room feeling pity for himself and telling his father to fuck off. After a week or so, Aitor (Iker's dad) decided to have a talk with him which actually turned out fine and it was the first time they had a proper conversation in years. Iker told him everything that happened with Aylin, Mia, and Virginia. To his surprise, his father not only listened but offered him the support he always craved from him. Aitor thought it would be a good idea if he spoke with his mother, so Aphrodite cleared out her schedule and visited him. They talked for hours (the most they've ever spoken) but it didn't end up well. Iker blamed her for making him believe in this skewed idea of love and Aphrodite didn't take the blame, naturally. They ended on bad terms.

OOC note: Okay, so before I leave I promised Daisy that I would actually write the letters Iker never gave Aylin while they dated and after they broke up. So, here they are. If you’re not Daisy, do not perceive gdgdgdhg. 

*

    A RAPID MONTAGE PLAYS OUT in her head, quick cuts of all the ways this could end. countless storyboards rearrange themselves in her imagination, while mia — physical and real — remains frozen at the scene. “ you would have resented me eventually if i hadn’t, ” she says as facts pulled straight from her own experience, finally lifting her gaze to meet his. the desire to tell tales from where she stands dies in the hollow of her throat. the hours of grief and numbing desolation, the weeks mia spent back home, the cruelness of her mother — all stories she can’t bear to tell. especially not to iker. not when he looks to be in as much pain as she is. “ i’m sorry, ” she chokes on a sob, but stifles it quickly,  “ i should have at least given you the chance to try and understand. ”

    her last labor of love, mia decides sitting across from him, would be to make herself small at that moment, “ you’re not the villain, iker ” — just for a brief moment, so she can make enough room for her to leave — “ but if it helps, i can be that. ” she casts herself in the role of his choosing, plays martyr by taking the blame, but the truth in her words cushion the blow, and mia moves away from him with subtle defeat, “ i just can’t be here anymore. ” because pointing fingers would get them nowhere, and exhaustion far outweighs her pride. “ for what it’s worth, ” mia begins as she stands by the open doorway, too much her father’s daughter to withdraw without a final line, “ i love you immensely. ” there’s no score to sound the last act, and cue the supercut that rolls over the frame — eight years of friendship condensed to fill a second of silence. she looks at him, and in suspended disbelief, sees him still as that boy from camp with the cocky grin that reminds her of home, always clutching a book riddled with margin notes. her friend, above and despite all, until she turns and finally exits the scene.

❈

Silently, he curses his mother, damned the 'gift' she had given him of feeling too much because it had put Iker’s own happiness in peril, his own relationship on the chopping block. Yet, he knows that the only person he should be cursing is himself, regardless of what he might think right now of his mother, Aphrodite didn't put a gun to his head and made him sleep with Virginia. He can do anything but stare at his hands and while he tries to refute her argument, he knows that she's right. He would resent her. Hell, he did resent her. That's the thing with Iker, he gets wounded as easily as he falls in love. Naturally, a resentful person, he thinks of his father and he can't conceive the thought of ever feeling that way about Mia. He hates her apology. He full on hates when she says she’s sorry, if only she’d said those words with the same tone she used when she was on screen. The problem with her apology, however, was that she did not use that tone. There was no hint of fake or mock honesty. On the contrary, if he closed his eyes, he could hear the pain in her voice. All he can do is offer her is a defeated shrug.

You’re not the villain, Iker. Then why does it feel like he is? He thinks about how 'treachery and violence are spears pointed at both ends' and how 'they wound those who resort to them'. The quote makes a lot more sense now, by trying to find a temporary cure for his pain, he ended up killing what mattered the most to him. Ironic, really. When she stands up and heads to the door, he can feel his heart drop but he finds no strength to pick it up and go after her. "Mia," he starts and it's barely audible and he wishes it had been loud enough to stop her from saying the next sentence. I love you immensely. The lump in his throat too unbearable to ignore and with that he buries his face in his hands, allowing himself to break down as she walks out of his life. If there had been a time Iker believed they had to have been made for each other, their souls too similar to not be meant to intertwine, now all that seems like a blur. Just like that, she leaves and he can't bear the weight of the love he feels for her, crushing him since he no longer has a place to pour it. It's painful, but not as agonizing as that of losing his friend.

the babe aka @euiker​ ( lilly’s, a bakery in athens )

       “ When I said I got something for you, this isn’t what I meant, ” said Sebastian, casual as he gesticulates to the bundle in front of them. On the table, the hot drink he was enjoying earlier was now abandoned and sitting on the other small but unoccupied table. Was there an explanation for this? He’ll try. The problem was, he spaced out as soon as he started hearing — needs looking after, it would only be a couple of hours at most — there was more to it, he’s sure. The rest, well, what was presented before him was too distracting and pressing. Everything else was provided, he was told. There’s nothing to worry about! Oh, really? How are they sure about … this?! “ So, yeah. You’ve done this before, right? ” Sebastian followed, turning his head to look at Iker.

∞

❈

He returns from washing his hands and suddenly the sight before his eyes make him think that he opened a door to a different dimension, one in which he had a baby with Sebastian. He looks back where he came from as expecting there was a door to bring him to his reality. "What is happening?" he asks, still confused by the scene. "Seb," she starts as he approaches to take a better look at the baby. "When you said we were going to the shelter, I thought maybe to adopt a puppy or a cat, but not a baby. Who is this child?" He has so many questions and as he's about to ask some more the child starts crying which makes Iker take a step back. "Does it look like I have experience? Do something, please!"

“ i never said you had to prove anything , “ she sighs, “you’re the one who keeps trying to justify how you care equally about both of them, which newsflash, you’re doing a horrible job at.”  he’s in the right, considering how she keeps pushing the topic but it doesn’t stop her from continuing to try and twist his words. her relationship with both sisters as different as day and night with virginia having a clear bias against mia and happy to let anyone who would lend an ear, hear about how horrible the blonde was. “no,” she objects, shaking her head, “let me be very clear — i am not nor have i ever been obsessed with mia stoeger.” a fine lie coming from her, considering how mia had actually been a sort of role model for virginia up until finding out they were related. obsessed being a word that did actually fit, considering she once identified as mia’s biggest fan. something she vehemently refuses to look back on, focusing her energy on how much she dislikes her sister. “my dislike for her is pretty obvious because she’s the actual worse. “maybe if you weren’t so obsessed with her, you’d actually see it.”

“you know you can say it, right? we hooked up, it happened. it was a mistake but it happened. contrary to popular belief, you won’t actually combust if you do.” her tone is factual though there’s a glint of a smirk placed on her lips. despite the serious of the situation, she still manages to find a place to insert an immature remark. reckless actions proving to have serious consequences, something she doesn’t handle well. an expert at pushing problems under the rug or ignoring them until they’re slapping her in the face, never knowing how to handle things. “no, i completely agree. it shouldn’t have happened.” there was no excuse for what happened between them. it had been as impulsive as i was careless, virginia letting what felt good in that moment outweigh her better judgement. though, it didn’t mean she enjoyed learning more about him as a person any less. there was something about him that clicked, like he actually understood her. maybe in another life they could have been actual friends, clearly this one seemed out of the question.

❈

There's a lot of truth in her argument but that doesn't stop the stroke of anger that makes his face drop. "Yeah, well, you're not doing a better job as a sister." He regrets the words as soon as they come out for Virginia doesn't have to be on the receiving end of his unwarranted anger. A dejected, pained sigh escapes his throat as Virginia tries to make him believe that lie but right now, he can't focus on fixing whatever issue Virginia had with Mia, if anything, he doesn't know if there's a solution. What he knows is that he's still on time to fix his relationship with Mia and that's something he doesn't plan to put in danger. "Virginia, stop, please stop," he groans, the sound full of frustration by her illogical reasoning. He's in no place to invalidate Virginia's feelings towards Mia, but he can't help but think they are unjustified. Sure, his bias and love for her could have blinded him from seeing the version Virginia wants him to see him, but that's the thing, after eight years he has found ways to look beyond what she lets you see. In love or not, Iker's affection for Mia remains adamant despite the flaws that make Virginia think differently of her. "I don't expect you to understand, I'm just asking you a favor. Can I trust you?"

There's something about Virginia's smirk that pisses him off, but he doesn't want to make a scandal and bring more attention to the situation, so instead, he takes a deep breath and waves his hand dismissively, refusing to acknowledge their hookup. It happened, but somehow not saying it out loud made it less real."Well, I'm glad we're on the same page about that." It's a bit ironic that Virginia and he got to speak this way, all that time he spent at the Dionysus house and they never really spoke. Who knows, maybe if they hadn't hooked up they could have been friends because to his surprise Virginia seems like someone he could trust and befriend, at least the trust bit remains and he can only hope she keeps the secret. “Thank you,” he says after a pause, but he really is thankful that she hasn’t said anything.

where: glaukopis library  with: @euiker​

      “hey dick-for-brains, can you stop ogling the undergrads for a minute and help me figure this shit out?” she asks, at the computer behind the front desk. “someone locked me out of my goddamn account. and before you say it, i know, i know, you’re too pretty or whatever dumbass excuse you’re going to tell me, but think of this– i don’t care. help me. or perish. dealer’s choice.” 

⋆

It felt so lovely, even if the conversation hadn’t really gone too deep, to for once not be given some lecture on how gods damn lucky she was and how beautiful her house was. With smiling eyes and a laugh caught in her throat– a lingering weight on her chest is lifted and Amelia is allowed to nod in agreement. “It’s very inconvenient if you ask me. Lots of bugs and dirt and dripping water. I recommend the classic flowers in a vase and leave it at that” Hand gesturing, eyes glinting. “God forbid Demeter ever heard that though, she’s…” In thought, her tongue licks her bottom lip as her eyes drift elsewhere. ”She’s not annoying, that would be better”. With a shrug, eyes return to that handsome face of his and Amelia can’t help but feel like a just bathed and brushed cocker spaniel being told what a good girl they are. The imagery is funny in her head, but she stands true to it with a proud smile and a straightened stance. “Oh I’m pretty? Well that’s good to know.” Amelia says with a chuckle, swaying at his nudge.

She watches him think and a part of her can’t help but… find their situation comical. A child of the goddess of love and beauty herself –tall, smart and pretty too–, telling her, Amelia, she was pretty enough to fit in the Aphrodite house? She supposed she should be flattered (and she was, the girl wasn’t known for her modesty), but she also thought… maybe she should be not just flattered, but blushing like a wildfire and swooning at his feet. That would be a more acceptable reaction to the situation, would it not be? Yet here she was– gazing up at his face and finding a friend with a shared passion– someone to learn for rather than somebody to die for. So she listens with that titled gaze of hers and nods in understanding. It baffled her how advance his reading habits were at the tender age of eight. To have read and somewhat understood a novel like that– with a smidge of poetry too (that is if she’d remained true to her poet position)… it was no easy fit. “It makes perfect sense”, Amelia nods slowly with a smile coloring her lips. “It’s a defining book… and I’m shocked that you were reading it as an eight year old, God. My father always pushed books into my hands but even then I was probably reading The Secret Garden or Narnia”. shoulders rise in a soft giggle.

“That would be incorrect mister literature major. The Illiad is easily longer and I’m pretty there are longer ones.” Amelia points out (with a finger too). Had she had the wish to remain longer than the necessary four year in Eonia, she might’ve gone ahead and signed up with a poetry double major… her one true love and one she also doesn’t know much about but somehow finds it better that way. It’s preferable to let yourself be carried away in the words and not have the incessant need to stop and count the structure, circle the figures. “For somebody who doesn’t read poetry, it’s definitely odd that your favorite book is written by a poet, don’t you think?” Her brow rises with an arrant half-smile. She stands up nonetheless. “Alright, fine. I’ll take that challenge. Honestly my favorite poetry is not by Barret Browning… All of the ‘How do I love thee? Let me count the ways’ is a little cheesy for me, but Aurora Leigh is good to… let yourself be carried away I guess. The plot is strong and there are a lot of ideas planted in between so– you know, not just imageries and symbolisms… Shall we look for them then?”

❈

He tries to fight off the subtle smile that graces his features, and it feels like he's always doing this around Amelia. Not only she was a bookworm like he was, but she had no filter to express her disdain towards her siblings instead of falling into a hypocrite vicious cycle and turns out that's a trait that he finds charming. "I don't think I've ever been inside, but the way you describe it doesn't really make me eager to visit anytime soon." The comment about her mother has him biting the inside of his cheek to stop him from laughing and disturbing others but he still lets out a soft chuckle. "I've always heard that she's very sweet and overprotective, but I love hearing about Demeter's plant hoarding activities." For a second he thinks about following Amelia's lead and complain about his own mother, but while he had those thoughts he never voices them out for that would mean that Aphrodite was not the perfect mother he claimed she was. "Well, that's not everything you need to be one of us. You also must speak French, which well, you do and you have to be terribly charming. So, Amelia, do you think of yourself as charming?" 

Friendships like the one he assumes he has with Amelia didn't come often for him which is why he feels more coy around her (or as coy as one child of Aphrodite can be) but there's something liberating about his interactions with her. He doesn't worry about keeping the façade of Aphrodite's poster boy, in a way, he feels more like himself and that's nice for a change. "What can I say? I come from a family of literature snobs," he admits with a chuckle. "It doesn't mean I understood everything, though. I got the main plot but it took me years before being able to understand the gothic aspect and the metaphors. As an eight year old I just thought it was a story about two people who loved each other way too much, of course, now I realize it a lot more intense than that." Some kids got their ideas of love from Disney films, and not from gothic love stories written in the Victorian Era, ironically this could explain a lot about the way his relationships carried out. "The Secret Garden is a great book, and I think your father has great taste for making you read it. I have to confess, I've never read Narnia."

"Oh, we're getting technical now," he says teasingly as he gently pushes her finger aside, a laugh escaping him which earns him a severe glare from the main librarian. "It's very on brand of me to love the only novels written by poets, take a look at Sylvia Plath. I love the The Bell Jar, but I have to admit I've neglected to read her poems," he confesses with a shake of his head. Poetry had never been his favorite form of literature but he respects Amelia's taste and that's why he doesn't find the challenge a hard challenge. "So, you're not into cheesy literature, okay, I'll keep that in mind." He listens as she talks about Aurora Leigh and the way she describes it makes him want to start already, it's so fascinating to see someone feeling passionate about the same thing. "Sure, let's go. We can pick Aurora Leigh first since it's closer. Also, maybe we can get together to talk about them when we start reading them, if you want, of course."

♠️

the door is still open behind her when her phone indicates several new messages and with a deep sigh, she looks through her bag to find it. a foolish thought that maybe she would be able to have a quiet night for herself. looking at the phone, however, doesn’t reveal the drama club or study group issues she had anticipated but instead several messages from iker. 

Message from: IKER  hey, we need to talk. Message from: IKER can you come to my place? Message from: IKER please, i need to show you something

while she’s unsure she has the energy required to deal with anything relating to her ex, she still messages a quick “omw” back, before walking backwards and closing the door of dionysus house behind her once more. goodbye quiet night in. on her way to aphrodite house she mentally goes through all the possible things iker could want to show her. maybe he would make some plea about mia being back and those two probably picking up things back up where they had left them. whyever he would think she’d be interested in hearing anything about that. 

when she finally arrives and noor opens the door, aylin only hugs her and quickly explains that she’s there to see iker, before walking on to iker’s room. the door is already open and so she sees this as an invitation and steps in. “alright, i’m here. what is it?” crossing her arms in front of her chest in what is probably a subconcious defense measure, she looks at him expectedly. that is until she retrieves a sheet of paper and holds it out to her. “oh, thank you, that’s…” she starts, until she realizes what it is he is holding. she swears she can physically feel her heart dopping to her feet. 

“i… you read it?!” her voice is a whisper, filled with shock as she can do nothing but look at the piece of paper in his hand. the piece of paper she had poured her heart’s content into. something he never, never should have gotten to read. she can’t get herself to look at him or even take the paper. instead, she slowly backs up towards the door, her first instinct a quick escape. “this.. you were never supposed to read this,” she mumbles shakily. there was something she should be doing right now to salvage this situation. probably get control of herself and laugh it off, make up some lie about creative writing or this being from a long time ago. instead she can hardly utter a word and everything inside her is yelling at her to leave, just LEAVE. 

❈

The tension filling the air is suffocating, but disturbingly familiar. The lack of concrete closure between them made it seem as if their interactions were cursed to always be full of awkward silences and urge to escape, perhaps today's chat could clear the air for them. "I know," he replies quietly, lowering his gaze, unable to look at Aylin. The purpose of the letter was never for him to read it and that only made things worse.

An unsent letter carries a different meaning, it's written with more depth, that protective layer of self-consciousness vanishes and it's easier to pour one's heart on it. Reading the contents of that letter meant reading Aylin's feelings unfiltered, the intimacy that came with spilling those words out onto paper was not meant to be shared, especially not with him. "I'm sorry I read it." His apologetic tone making his chest ache for that apology conveys so much more and he's sure that no amount of admissions of guilt can erase what he did to her.

A silence befalls them as Iker tries to gather the thousand thoughts hammering in his head. Just like that asking her to come here seems like a huge error, why put her through this again? This is nothing but another guilt-ridden and selfish act, a sadistic way to get some peace of mind. "Why didn't you tell me you felt like this?" A stupid question, he knows why. The answer is probably the same as to why the box next to him contained many unsent letters. "I thought you were fine, over me." For someone who knows how to play the 'I don't care' game, he surely should have known better than believing Aylin's façade but perhaps that's just proof of her acting skills.

"We don't have to talk about it but maybe we should? Maybe try to get some closure." He says, hesitantly as he grabs the box. It's only fair to give her the chance to read his innermost feelings but maybe that's a box she doesn't want to open. "I wrote you some letters before I..." he trails off, caught up by surprise by the weight of the word that ensues. "Before I cheated on you. I also wrote you some after, but well, I never gave them to you. If you want to read them, they're all yours."

SOCIAL MEDIA

STARTER FOR: @euiker​​

LOCATION:iker’s room

“YOU REALLY NEED TO STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS,” ivan says, shaking his head as a long frustrated sigh escapes him. if he had known he had to come back to the civil war that was the dionysus house, he would have stayed back in russia eating questionable food but unfortunately, the lack of communication stop him from finding out all this mess. “it’s really hard being your best friend, you know?” if he hadn’t known iker for so long, he would have cut him out of his life long ago. while ivan was a son of dionysus, he only liked drama on stage or on the screen, but not in real life. “so, what are you going to do now? and don’t expect me to help, i’m switzerland in all this mess.”

❈

It didn't take Ivan long enough to bring up the topic and while it's not a laughing matter he can't help but chuckle at the way he says it, there's no harm in trying to find some humor in this shitty situation. "What? Are you jealous it's not you?" he replies, a weak attempt to divert the conversation into a lighter subject. "Yeah, well, you can cut me out of your life like everyone in your family." Iker purses his lips in thought before continuing, "I'm used to it by now." His smile fades, though it’s still present. It softens. "I wasn't planning to ask you for help, you or anyone." How could they even help? He wasn't even sure if it had a solution. "Anyway, do you wanna go out, or am I supposed to pay you for the unsolicited therapy?

LOCATION : temple

Il tempio non è uno dei suoi luoghi più frequentati, anzi, questa potrebbe essere la prima volta che viene qui. A mali estremi, estremi rimedi e in questo momento ha un disperato bisogno di una guida e chi potrebbe offrire una guida migliore di sua madre: la dea dell'amore? Non è sicuro di come funziona, sfortunatamente, questo tipo di situazione non è accompagnata da istruzioni. Si trova davanti alla sua statua, e questo momento sembra un po' come quel film della Disney. Si sente ridicolo per averlo fatto, ma per fortuna non c'è nessuno in giro, o almeno così crede. È troppo impegnato con la sua offerta che all'inizio non si accorge della presenza di Leo finché non vede la sua ombra e quasi gli viene un infarto. "Ti dispiace?" inizia con un'alzata di occhi. "Sono nel bel mezzo di qualcosa e la tua presenza mi disturba".

💤

     the nickname makes her bristle, and she turns around, ready to wail on the familiar voice, but she stops herself, fuming, as she stares up at him. “are you looking to die, bizcay?” she hisses up at him, and then gives him an once over. “you look like shit,” she states flatly. “for an aphrodite kid.” the annoying ability they have to look put together no matter what she thinks is lost upon some of these people. there’s a moment of silence as she mulls it over, then snatches the bottle out of his hand. “fuck it. why not?” she doesn’t have anything better to do. and she hates him. but that’s beside the point. “i took you to be more of a flask guy, but i guess this will work.” she unscrews it, sniffs the contents, then takes a swig, and braces. “is this expensive vodka in a plastic water bottle? what the fuck?”

LOCATION : game alley

The carnival buzzes with idle chatter, laughter, and the occasional screams that came from some of the attractions. It's loud enough to quiet the thoughts that had been flooding his head since his (second) break up with Mia, and even if he wasn't in a joyous mood to be part of the buoyant environment he has to admit that it's a good distraction and right now that's exactly what he needs, a distraction. In a place full of people he tries to find said distraction and that's when out of the corner of his eye he spots a blonde. It's a move he has well studied, the charming smile, soothing tone, and well, the looks given by Aphrodite herself. An infallible plan. "Hey, any luck yet?" he says, standing next to her before realizing the blonde is Clarisse. Immediately, his demeanor changes. He takes a step to the side, tucks hands into the pockets, and switches the smirk for a small smile. "Clarisse, hi. Uh, are you having fun?"