it’s new year’s eve at some random kid from iroquois high school’s house, and a party is blaring. andre and cal arrived an hour or two ago, and cal is already drunk and somewhat stoned. andre has had only a couple drinks and a few hits of cal’s joint. he feels a bit woozy, but he’s not too far gone.
everyone is staring at the tv as the countdown to midnight starts. cal has an arm around andre and another around rachel. the two brunettes don’t really like each other, but they’ll get along enough to hang out with cal at parties. it’s not like andre goes to as many as rachel does.
when the countdown reaches midnight, andre doesn’t know what he expects. he doesn’t expect a kiss from cal, but maybe he’ll get a hug, maybe cal will let go of rachel and pull him into an embrace.
that isn’t what happens, though.
cal retracts his arm from around andre and yanks rachel closer to him. their lips meet, and their eyes close. the kiss lasts a little too long to mean nothing. andre just stares until it’s over. he glances at the ground when cal looks back at him.
again, he didn’t know what he expected…but it definitely wasn’t that. cal kissing rachel? the girl andre hates? the girl andre knows is a bad influence on the younger boy? that was a bit too much for him, but he can’t show it.
he takes a big swig of the drink in his hand, finishing it off and scrunching his nose as it burns all the way down his throat. he feels a little too sober now despite being a little tipsy moments before.
cal smiles at him, and andre forces a smile, showing the tiniest bit of teeth. it looks more like a grimace than a grin. cal’s too drunk to notice. rachel drags him off to somewhere they can be alone, and cal follows willingly.
andre is left alone in the middle of the room. he’s the only person not cheering, kissing, or dancing. he feels particularly lonely in this moment. he wants to leave now, but he knows he’s cal’s ride home. he can’t just leave the blond boy, no matter how badly he wants to.
he wants cal to feel as bad as he does, but at the same time he doesn’t. he doesn’t want cal to have to wait for a ride, to have to stand out in the cold. he doesn’t want cal’s mom to pick him up, for him to get grounded during their last week before school starts. he doesn’t want cal to suffer. still, he wishes cal knew how much he hurts.
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