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I want someone to tell me what to wear in the morning. No, I want someone to tell me what to wear every morning. I want someone to tell me what to eat. What to like. What to hate. What to rage about. What to listen to. What band to like. What to buy tickets for. What to joke about. What not to joke about. I want someone to tell me what to believe in. Who to vote for and who to love and how to…tell them. I just think I want someone to tell me how to live my life, Father, because so far, I think I’ve been getting it wrong. And I know that’s why people want someone like you in their lives, because you just tell them how to do it. You just tell them what to do and what they’ll get out of the end of it, even though I don’t believe your bullshit and I know that scientifically nothing that I do makes any difference in the end, anyway, I’m still scared. Why am I still scared? So just tell me what to do. Just fucking tell me what to do, Father. — Fleabag, S02E04
Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible.
Carl Jung, “Memories, Dreams, Reflections”
I am constantly trying to communicate something incommunicable, to explain something inexplicable, to tell about something I only feel in my bones and which can only be experienced in those bones.
Franz Kafka, “Letters to Milena”
It’s so hard to speak and say things that cannot be said. It’s so silent.
—Clarice Lispector, Agua Viva
“There is something at the bottom of every new human thought, every thought of genius, or even every earnest thought that springs up in any brain, which can never be communicated to others, even if one were to write volumes about it and were explaining one’s idea for thirty-five years; there’s something left which cannot be induced to emerge from your brain, and remains with you forever; and with it you will die, without communicating to anyone perhaps the most important of your ideas.”― Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Idiot
—Margaret Atwood, “Journey to the interior”, from Selected Poems (1965-1975)
L. V., excerpts from that sunday

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to be loved by me is to be loved forever
And thus, for me, it is eternal misery
Letters to Felice, Franz Kafka, December 9th, 1912
from "Poems of Fernando Pessoa"
from Franz Kafka's "Letters to Felice"
I am writing this a month before your birthday. I am on my way home and I am currently listening to invisible string by taylor swift. I know, you don't listen to her unless I ask you to (or force you to hehe). Anyway, it made me think and realize that taylor swift was right— all along there was some invisible string tying you to me. Meeting you was't accidental; it was the result of various moments and decisions in my life that led me to you— I wasn't just existing in a world where there was you, I exist because I am meant to be with you, as you are meant to be with me. It took us years to meet, I had to go through heartbreaks, I had to meet a lot of people, all of which eventually led me to you. Looking back, it's funny to think that I was talking to you about a heartbreak, not knowing that one day, I won't even remember a single memory of that heartbreak. And that one day, I'd be with you, the love of my life.
My palangging, I know I've said this again and again but let me say it once more— it has always been you. My life has been more fun with you in it. I've always thought that I was meant to be alone, to navigate the world without truly knowing someone and without being known, then there was you. I aspire to be as kind and selfless as you. And I hope you know that you are a gift to everyone in your life. I am eternally grateful for having you in my life, and I can't wait to spend more time with you.
I love you always. Happiest birthday, palangging ko.
With so much love,
Your Emma

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— Mary Lambert, Shame Is an Ocean I Swim Across; "You Are with the Wrong Person" (via lunamonchtuna)
— Rachel Mennies, from The Naomi Letters "April 18, 2017" (via lunamonchtuna)
cycles of yearning
i guess i'll be alone and lonely forever. never heard nor seen. that must be my fate— all alone and lonely.
tired and lost.

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He Qifang, from a poem titled "I'd Like to Talk About All Kinds of Pure Things," featured in Modern Chinese Poetry: An Anthology
I had the impression that I was never quite as witty as they hoped; that from the page, they had gathered expectations I would never meet.
Abigail Dean, from The Death of Us