IntoxicateHumans👽

“Find someone that pulls you in when you push them away. Find someone that cares for you when you don’t care to live. Find someone that chases you when you run faraway. Find someone that loves you when you have no more love to give.”

“Find comfort in knowing that you are simply a version of yourself that doesn’t exist anymore in the lives of the people you’ve burned bridges with. You’ve grown. You’ve changed. And that wouldn’t be possible without their absence.”

This year I learned to be selfish. Selfish with my time, my heart, my feelings, my mind and most importantly myself. I spent entirely too much time feeling sorry for the things I couldn’t change, wishing for things I didn’t have, and begging for people who did not deserve me. It has taken me two decades to realize I am a prize worth winning, I am a caviar dinner not a gas station hot dog. This year I’ve lost people I thought I couldn’t live without and given myself everything I needed. Next year, I hope I can learn to love myself.

who do you look for when someone says love, because i look for you, a black curly haired playful boy, who feels frowning makes him look much better than when he laughs endlessly at my stupid jokes.  who do you think of when someone says love, because i think of you, a smart, loving individual, who finds solace in a pizza and football games than glasses of alcohol and loud music that is currently trending. what do you want when someone describes love, because i want you, with your strong arms around me, cuddling infront of the fireplace every christmas, instead of different boys on different festivals

As you get older, you can energetically feel the difference between people who love you and those who care at their own convenience.

I wish people could just say how they feel like ‘Hey I really don’t like when you do that to me’ or ‘Hey I’m in love with you’ or ‘Hi I really miss you and I think about you all the time’ without sounding desperate. Why can’t everyone be painfully honest and just save people the trouble.