em’

It felt wrong to admit to, but you were almost glad that things were definitively over with him. To some extent, you’d just been searching for a reason to end things, aware that you were never really going to feel that passion for him. 

Not when your passion always seemed reserved for someone else. 

You wished you hadn’t had to deal with a load of vile name calling in the process, but you’d blocked his number and what was done, was done. 

“Shit, I’m sorry. He seemed like a mostly good guy,” Yuki said, dragging the varnish brush slowly over her own nails, half focused on the task and half on you. She was the type of girl who liked to make a lot of eye-contact when speaking, and subsequently orange paint was getting all over her skin.  

“Mmm. Want me to do your nails for you?” 

“Nah, you’ll smudge yours. I’ll manage.” She waved you off. “So you’re not speaking with him at all anymore?” 

“No way. We’re done, I really wasn’t sure how into him I was anyway.” 

“I get that. It didn’t look like the chemistry was really there.”

That made sense, considering that you spent the whole reunion speaking to Yuki and Shoko rather than paying Kashimo any attention. Oh, and there was also the fact that you couldn’t take your eyes off Sukuna half the time that you were at the damn gathering. 

Somehow, seeing Kashimo and Sukuna in the same place only made you more certain that you’d never really feel anything for the former. The way that Sukuna stirred your heart with a single look was unlike anything that anyone else had made you feel. Kashimo would certainly never manage it - even the nice version of him that you’d originally known. 

“Yeah, it is what it is.” You shrugged. “Plenty of fish in the sea, I’ll find someone else.” 

You were pretty certain that you wouldn’t have to look very hard to find someone else - in fact, there was one fish in particular that was simply begging to be reeled in, but you’d keep him on the hook for a little longer. No point in making things too easy for him. 

Lately, your reservations about Sukuna had been dwindling. Kashimo had been one of your main excuses, and now that was all out of the way. The other excuse had been Ryu’s ghost haunting you whenever you’d look at the pink-haired man, but with all the time you’d been spending with him lately, you found that the guilt bothered you less and less. 

It had been four years since Ryu’s death, and he’d cheated on you in life. Why should you have to punish yourself forever just because of an unfortunate coincidence? Sukuna had made a very good point that Ryu would’ve likely died whether you’d been faithful or not. 

So why were you denying yourself happiness? 

You’d planned to break up with Ryu back then anyway, had planned to choose Sukuna before all hell broke loose. Now that time had moved on and things were calmer, it felt foolish to let a dead man stand in the way of things. Being with Sukuna was your choice alone, and the way that he’d comforted you outside the reunion had eroded away the last few shreds of doubt that you’d been hanging onto.

Not that you could tell Yuki any of that, because she’d absolutely kill you. 

“Honestly though, I almost thought that Gojo was lying - figured Sukuna had paid him to make Kashimo look bad or something,” Yuki said, “y’know, because he’s a conniving little shit.”

To be honest, you’d initially had some of the same suspicions, but Gojo was far too specific for it all to be lies. Sukuna didn’t know Kashimo well enough to provide Gojo with information about gigs and such - it had to be legitimate. 

“Sukuna definitely had no idea - he seemed so shocked when he found me crying. Besides, Kashimo's reaction over text said it all.”

Yuki’s eyes narrowed, and you cursed yourself for that idle slip of the tongue. As far as she was concerned you’d had very little to do with Sukuna recently. You hadn’t even told her that the two of you worked together. 

“When he found you crying?” She echoed, looking thoroughly unimpressed. “Was that at the reunion? Tell me that you walked away and didn’t bother telling him anything.” 

Shrugging, you stared down at your shiny nails. “We just chatted for a bit, it's not a big deal.” You must not have sold that line as well as you were hoping, based on the way that Yuki was staring at you with utter disbelief. 

“If it's not a big deal, what’re you blushing for?” 

“I’m not.” You lied, feeling suddenly defensive. You weren’t sure if it was better to deny any claims of association with Sukuna, or if you should just turn around and tell Yuki that you were a grown woman who could do what she liked. 

Neither option was all that appealing. 

“You are. If all you did was chat, I’m sure you wouldn’t mind telling me what you were chatting about.” Yuki’s voice was cold, tinged with disappointment. There had been only a few times in your life where you’d been the subject of her ire, and you always hated it. It made you feel smaller than being disciplined by your actual parents. 

Chewing on your lip, you wondered what would placate her most effectively for the time being, without it coming back to bite you in the ass one day. You certainly weren’t going to mention the kiss, nor were you going to share just how much talk of a potential future relationship there had been. 

However, it probably didn’t serve you to omit the fact that Sukuna was working for your dad, and that your friendship had been steadily growing over the last few weeks. If you were to keep that information quiet, it was likely that it would come out down the line and then Yuki would be really mad at you for lying. 

Better to face a little bit of her anger now rather than a lot of it later. 

“He was just comforting me,” you said finally. “He ran into me when I was leaving the bathroom all teary-eyed, and I was frazzled so I told him about what had been happening. He listened and gave some words of reassurance while I calmed down, that’s all.” 

Yuki didn’t look convinced. “Let me guess - did he wrap an arm around you and tell you about how you deserve so much better? Did he tell you about how there are plenty of guys out there willing to give you everything you deserve? Oh, oh, did he tell you that he’d never treat you the way that Kashimo did?”

“No,” you lied easily. 

So what if he said and did all of those things? You had faith that he was being honest about it, and it wasn’t like he had negative intentions for you. He’d been waiting patiently for a chance with you for over four years - that was more dedication than either Ryu or Kashimo had shown. 

He wasn’t the villain that Yuki believed him to be. 

But there was no convincing her of that fact, so it just felt easier to lie. 

“He’s been working for my dad,” you added. “We’ve had a few opportunities to talk since I got back into town. We haven’t discussed the past at all and he’s been nothing but pleasant - I don’t think there’s any need for you to hate on him like you are, he’s just a guy.” 

Yuki was silent for a while, avoiding eye contact. It had you feeling antsy, because she was clearly thinking about what to make of your statement. A deep sigh wracked her body, and she took her time screwing on the lid of her nail polish before looking at you once more. 

“If there’s nothing untoward going on, why are you only now telling me that you’ve been working with him?” 

A valid point, but you tried not to appear flustered by her response. The best course of action here was to make it look like she was blowing things out of proportion and acting ridiculous - which she kind of was. Sukuna’s only crime was sleeping with you while you were in a relationship, and it wasn’t like he coerced you into it - far from it. 

You’d wanted him as much as he’d wanted you. 

“Because I knew you’d freak out like you are right now. You act like he’s the damn antichrist.”

Yuki scoffed. “He manipulated you into cheating on Ryu.” 

“He didn’t, and I’m sick of pretending that he did. I’m capable of making my own bad decisions and that night was one of them. I shouldn’t have cheated, but it wasn’t Sukuna’s fault. I’m the one that was in a relationship, not him.” 

The roll of her eyes told you that Yuki didn’t accept that excuse for even a second. “He waited until you were most vulnerable to prey on you, and I’m pretty sure that you’re smart enough to know it.” 

“No, he-” you started to argue, only to catch yourself. There was no point in squabbling over this - Yuki had made up her mind about Sukuna long ago, and no argument would serve to change her mind. The only thing that would have an impact is seeing Sukuna’s positive treatment of you with her own eyes.

And that was something that she’d potentially have to come to terms with one day. 

“Look, let's just not talk about this, okay? I came over to hang out with you, let's not waste time talking about boys.” 

It was frustrating, because you could really do with talking about the Sukuna situation with someone impartial. You were attracted to him, you’d always known that, but it would be nice to have someone objectively tell you if giving things a go was a good idea. You’d get no objectivity from Yuki, and that made discussing it a waste of time. 

Perhaps you could talk it through with Shoko instead. She’d shown vitriol for Sukuna when in Yuki’s presence, but she wasn’t the type to get amped up about anything really. It was likely that she’d be able to give you a more honest opinion on how you should proceed. 

“You’re right.” There was something in her tone that told you that she didn’t really want to cut the conversation short, only willing to concede for the sake of avoiding any damage to your friendship. It was clear that she was eager to bring you over to her side, unsatisfied at the idea of you defending him or spending time with him in any capacity. 

It was fine for her to feel that way. She just needed to understand that it was your decision to make. Not hers. 

“Before we move on though - please tell me you’re not considering getting with him.” 

Yuki’s expression was pleading, the worried furrow of her brow painfully evident. For the last four years she’d desperately tried to talk down the concept of Sukuna whenever he’d come up in conversation, along with running interference to ensure that the two of you never ran into one another whenever you were in town. 

You imagined that she was seeing four years of hard work unravel before her eyes, and was desperate to cling on to some semblance of it. 

It was likely that you were going to have to apologise to her for your actions in the coming weeks, if you went along with the desires that were currently building within you. But you could cross that bridge once you came to it. 

For now, what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her. 

“Me getting with Sukuna?” You asked, waving your hand flippantly. “Oh no, definitely not!” 

—

“Double cheeseburger, that’s mine. Here’s your chicken burger.” Sukuna was rummaging around in a paper bag that he’d picked up from Doug’s, distributing lunch out between the two of you. “Oh, they ran out of the strawberry flavouring so I got you a chocolate milkshake instead, hope that’s okay.” 

“Thanks.” Your fingers brushed his as you took the plastic cup from him, sending a pleasant shiver through your hand. You took a sip before placing the milkshake down on the world’s best dad coaster at your side, focusing your attention back on the ancient computer while Sukuna got started on his meal.

Your father was currently facing an audit, and that meant that you were working overtime to get his records in order. Subsequently, you couldn’t head out for lunch like you usually would, which had led to Sukuna bringing lunch to you instead. He seemed perfectly content sitting across from you in that little trailer, quietly watching you work while he enjoyed his break from manual labour. 

“Can I help?” He asked, after a period of silence, gesturing to the computer.

“Nah. This thing just happens to be the slowest machine in the universe, so organising everything is taking ages. It doesn’t help that my dad doesn’t bother putting anything into folders - there’s documents everywhere.” 

“Mmm. I saw Satoru’s desktop the other day and it was chaos. Icons all over the screen and some random popups and shit.” Sukuna said. 

“This one isn’t that bad. But I am gonna tell my dad to buy a new one - if I’m going to work with the damn thing everyday, I need it to run faster than this.” 

A chime of a text sounded from your bag, and you glanced over at it but didn’t bother to check. It was most likely just Yuki messaging with a plan for the weekend - one of Choso’s siblings was getting married and she wanted you and Shoko to go dress shopping with her in the city. You were considering faking a cold, still on shaky ground with her after your conversation the other day. 

So instead of reading her text and lamenting about it further, you turned your attention to your food, unwrapping the chicken burger and taking a big bite. You had to admit, it was nice to have Sukuna bringing you lunch - you probably wouldn’t have eaten all day otherwise, too focussed on the task at hand. 

“Heard from Kashimo again?” Sukuna asked, nodding his head in the direction of your bag. 

You were almost surprised that he was asking - you’d figured that the second your ex was out of the picture, Sukuna would wipe the name from his mind. After all, you imagined that he saw Kashimo as nothing more than an obstacle that had now been thoroughly removed. 

“No, nothing. Wasn’t expecting to though.” You said with a shrug. 

“No? You didn’t think he’d come crawling back to beg?”

You scoffed in disbelief. “I told you what he said over text, right?” 

Sukuna hummed. “The abridged version, I guess.” 

Your retelling of the story to Sukuna had been a little fragmented, since you’d been so enraged. The evening after the reunion, he’d called you to check that you were okay after your tearful day, only to get a full rant about the texts that Kashimo had sent you after the party. You probably didn’t explain it well, but you were sure he got the gist. 

Either way, you hadn’t really talked about it since then. You had no interest in bringing it up, and you assumed that he saw it as something of a touchy subject. 

“You can read the texts if you want.” You rummaged in your bag, pulling out your pink flip phone, ignoring the message from Yuki and opening up the texts from Kashimo, before handing it over to Sukuna. 

“Cute.” He mused, inspecting the Hello Kitty charm hanging off the side of your cell before turning his attention to the messages. 

“I mean- I can’t believe that I ever thought he was a nice guy. It was all just some dumb act. I really need to thank Gojo for giving me a heads up, because who knows how long it would’ve taken me to see this side of him otherwise. Imagine if I’d moved in with the guy only to find out that he was acting like this behind my back.” 

Sukuna hummed, carefully reading through the messages, his brows furrowed in displeasure. “He called you a whore? When he was the one sleeping with other people?”

“Yeah.” You rolled your eyes. “Called me a lot of other shit too. Guess he didn’t like being rejected.”

“What a jerk. Want me to kill him for you?” 

You stared up at Sukuna, unimpressed by his amused expression.

“Don’t even joke about that.” 

“Sorry, poor taste.” His grin didn’t drop, but you let it go easily. 

You knew that he’d never really been broken up over Ryu’s death - he’d never actually liked the guy. Making morbid jokes didn’t register in his mind in the same way that they did in yours, and the thought of Ryu’s death probably only came up for him when you’d bring it up. 

Besides, it had been four years. When were you going to get less sensitive about it? 

“Seriously though, I could track this guy down and give him a beating - if that’s what you wanted?” Sukuna’s expression was painfully earnest, not unlike a dog waiting for their owner to give them a command. 

Shaking your head, you offered him a soft smile. “He’s really not worth all that. Besides, I don’t want you beating anyone up.”

He shrugged. “Your choice. I would do it though.” 

“Noted.” 

You definitely believed him. Even though you’d never been witness to it, you heard all the rumors about fights he’d been in when you were back in school. He’d even punched Ryu once, before the two of you had started dating - not that Ryu had ever been interested in discussing it, apparently humiliated by his loss. 

Before Sukuna could make further promises of violence towards anyone who caused you strife, the door creaked open and your dad walked in. He was holding a paper cup from the nearby coffee van, but seemed to stop in his tracks at the sight of Sukuna and the food laid out on the table between you. 

“I was coming in to bring you a coffee but it looks like someone beat me to it!” 

To be fair, while Sukuna had bought you lunch, he hadn’t brought you a coffee, and you could really do with the caffeine. “I’d still like it! Thanks dad.” You smiled at him as he walked over, gratefully taking the warm cup from him and putting it down beside your half-drunk milkshake. 

He straightened up, hesitating for a second as he glanced between you and Sukuna. It was obvious that he’d expected to find you alone in the trailer, certainly not having lunch with his most rough-around-the-edges employee. You tried your best to ignore his unease, going back to eating your meal and pretending that your dad wasn’t fidgeting in your periphery. 

You couldn’t decide if his awkwardness was due to a dislike of Sukuna, or if he simply had something that he wanted to tell you in private.

“Are you done with that foundation, kid?” He asked, as Sukuna finished the final bite of his burger.

“‘Course.” 

“Good, good.” 

From what you could tell, Sukuna was an excellent worker, easily one of the most productive employees that your father had. It was likely a result of age - at twenty-two Sukuna was in the prime of his life where physical strength was concerned. The majority of your dad’s men were over twice that age. 

The silence stretched out for a few seconds as your father continued to awkwardly linger. “Everything okay?” You asked, eager for him to spit out whatever was sitting on the tip of his tongue. 

“Yeah, I’d really just dropped by to keep you company, but I guess I didn’t need to…” 

Your brow furrowed at the slight distaste in his tone. You weren’t sure if this was one of those typical overprotective father quirks - you’d never really seen him around guys that you liked before this interaction. He’d never met Ryu, because you’d kept the relationship a secret, and when Kashimo came to visit, he’d seemed largely unbothered. 

Probably because he’d seen how unbothered you were about the man. 

But there was something about his demeanour which felt threatened, or perhaps irritated, by the fact that someone else was here taking up your time. Perhaps it was about that person specifically being Sukuna - you didn’t really know anything about the nature of their working relationship. 

“I should probably get back to work anyway!” Sukuna chirped with a smile, breaking through the awkwardness. 

He tossed the burger packaging into the trash can at the side of the desk and stood up, stretching his arms above his head. He looked a little out of place in the tiny trailer - far too big for the space when drawn up to his full height. 

“We’re still on for tomorrow, right?” Sukuna asked as he drifted in the direction of the door. “For Misery at the drive-in?”

“Yeah, of course.” The way that he smiled back at you made your heart flutter desperately. He’d invited you over the phone a few days ago, and although he hadn’t said it outright, there was no doubt in your mind that he viewed it as a date. 

You’d almost turned him down, almost reminded him of your chat at the reunion in which you’d made it clear that any conversation about the two of you would take place exclusively on your terms. 

But the issue with that was the fact that you did want to go with him. 

You were sick of delaying, sick of having dream after dream of Sukuna’s hands on you, sick of your heart practically jumping out of your chest whenever he’d come by to grab you for lunch. You liked him, you’d always liked him. Knowing that was true, what was the point in wasting more time on silly games? 

The best way to find out if things would work was to try. If you kissed him properly and all you could think of was Ryu’s dead body, then you knew that it would never be possible. But if you kissed him and the horrible, soul-crushing guilt remained absent? Then you could have everything that your soul had been yearning for.

“Perfect, I’ll pick you up at eight.” 

You gave him a nod as he stepped out of the trailer, the door creaking and slamming shut behind him. Turning your attention to your dad, you caught the way that his brow was furrowed ever so slightly, a mix of curiosity and disappointment present on his weathered face. 

“I didn’t realise you guys were so close,” he said, waving his hand in the direction of the door. You supposed that made sense - the last time he’d seen the two of you interact was when Sukuna had been in here with his injured hand, and you’d shown an overall reluctance to even talk to the man. 

You shrugged, before moving to clean up the table a little bit, anything to avoid eye contact. “We’re friends.” 

“You know him well?” 

“Well enough,” you answered. “He’s the only person here even remotely near my age, so he’s kinda the only choice for someone to talk to.” That was a partial lie - because while there really weren’t any other employees in your age bracket, you would still be hanging out with Sukuna even if that wasn't the case. 

“You aren’t dating him, are you?” 

Balking at the straightforwardness of that question, you were quick to shake your head. “No, we’re just friends. God, dad, I only just broke up with Kashimo, what do you think I’m like?” 

He put his hands up defensively, clearly a little embarrassed by your response. “Sorry, sorry. I just had to ask. It's just- with him bringing you lunch, and going to drive-ins, it kinda seemed that way.”

You’d long since learned how to play the guilt game with your parents - you’d used it to hide your relationship with Ryu and get your way in other areas of life for years, so instead of accepting his apology, you pushed your advantage. You didn’t want him asking about Sukuna again anytime soon. 

“Well it isn’t. It's been so hard for me moving back to town, living with my parents again like some kind of failure, all on top of my boyfriend cheating on me. Sukuna is one of the few people who’s actually been a good friend to me. Besides, I’m going to the drive-in with him and several other friends, you don’t need to be so suspicious.” 

“I hear you-” 

“Plus, I’m a grown-up! You don’t get to come in here and dictate anything to me that isn’t work related. I can’t believe that you still don’t trust me to make good decisions, it makes me so upset.” You were sure that the look on your face was sufficiently frustrated, because this exact act had been working on your dad for at least fifteen years at this point

“Sorry, honey,” he said, looking dejected. “I was just being nosey. There’s nothing wrong with being his friend - he’s a good worker. But I was just hoping you weren’t dating a guy like him - you deserve better than spending your life in some shitty little apartment with a guy who can barely make ends meet.”

His tone was soft, disarming. It was clear that he was trying to make amends for upsetting you, inadvertently making you more annoyed in the process, because there was no reason to be so prejudiced against Sukuna for his financial situation or for anything else. He’d always been kind to you, and in your mind that mattered more than having a nice house and a fancy corporate job. 

“I think it's wrong that you speak about your employees like that,” you said. “He can’t make ends meet because you pay him minimum wage.” 

“Look, it's not just the money.”

Of course he glazed over that part. 

“I just don’t want any daughter of mine marrying some guy with face tattoos. It's unsavory - gives off the wrong sort of impression.” 

You could kind of understand the sentiment, but Ryu didn’t have face tattoos and he cheated on you. Kashimo certainly didn’t have face tattoos and he also cheated on you. You were pretty sure that outward appearance did little to dictate a person’s quality.

But your dad was old-fashioned, so that was unlikely to move him, and therefore not an argument worth making - especially not when you were in the process of trying to convince him that you weren’t interested in dating Sukuna. 

So you just held your tongue and rolled your eyes, deciding that you were done having this conversation. Just like with Yuki, if something happened with Sukuna, you could cross that bridge when you came to it, but you wouldn’t be having the argument now. 

“Well then,” you said softly, giving your father a pointed smile, “aren’t you lucky I’m not dating him?” 

—

Sukuna came to pick you up for your date at 8pm. 

You were already waiting outside for him, not eager for him to encounter either of your parents. Even if you were certain that your dad felt sufficiently awkward to not cause any further strife, you didn’t want to take the risk. 

Especially considering that you’d lied and said others were coming - when they clearly weren’t. 

Sukuna had openly looked you up and down as you hopped into his truck, doing little to conceal the desire glimmering in his crimson eyes. You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t dressed up specially for him, meticulously planning your outfit to ensure that he took notice of the way it hugged your body. 

“You look pretty,” he purred. “Making me feel underdressed.” 

He was dressed pretty casually, wearing a grey Bullet for my Valentine hoodie and loose fitting black jeans. He looked incredibly good all the same, just as he always seemed to, no matter what he was wearing. Part of you pondered what it would be like to wear that hoodie, fantasising over the idea of him putting it on you if you got cold later in the night. 

It probably smelt great - just like he always did. 

You shrugged. “I just wanted to dress up for once.” The line was innocent, but the way you fluttered your lashes at him was not. He offered you a grin, shaking his head just a little before starting the car, driving you over to the drive-in on the edge of town. 

It was a nice little spot, albeit slowly dying now that so many people had flat screen TVs to rely on and an extensive collection of DVDs all in the comfort of their homes. Either way, you had great memories of swinging by as a kid, McDonalds Happy Meal clutched in your hands as you watched whatever family-friendly movie they were putting on that weekend. 

For some reason it was always your dad that used to take you - your mother would never go. You assumed that she used those precious two hours a week to get some alone time while your dad was watching you, considering that she did the majority of the child related labour. 

As you’d grown older, you’d started going along to the drive-in with friends, watching a number of classic teen movies like Grease and The Breakfast Club. The second that Yuki had gotten a car you’d all piled into it to come to the run-down place, enjoying that taste of freedom that you’d never had before, laughing at the sight of poor teens who were still tethered to their parents. 

You hadn’t been there since Ryu’s death. After that situation you hadn’t felt like doing anything in town, living in a total state of isolation until you went off to university, completely overwhelmed with the idea of how to deal with anything. 

Since you’d come back to town, you felt like you’d almost been reborn. You no longer lived in fear of doing things and going places, and could look at everything with a comfortably nostalgic view rather than one riddled with guilt and anxiety. Perhaps all you’d needed was time. 

To an extent, you wondered if some amount of your calmer mental state was due to Sukuna’s presence. So much of your fear and guilt had been centered around him, and perhaps your avoidance of the man had built those feelings up into a storm disproportionate to reality. 

Spending time with him could almost be seen as exposure therapy - a way of facing that fear and guilt you’d been running from and letting it all go. It was a practice in accepting your faults and choosing your own happiness. 

“So what’s this movie? Misery?” You asked as you parked up. There weren’t a massive amount of cars in the lot, maybe only a dozen others. It was likely that the drive-in wouldn’t keep running for many more years with the lack of patronage. 

“Yeah, based on the Stephen King book, y’know?” Sukuna’s voice was a little muffled as he reached behind him between your two seats, rummaging about in his bag for something. The action brought him in closer proximity to you, and your heart picked up slightly at the light scent of his cologne. “Here, brought you some M&Ms.”

You scrambled to catch the bag of candy as he tossed it over to you. “Oh. I haven’t read any Stephen King.” Somehow that felt like a crime to confess to considering how popular he was with so many people when you were in high school. You’d been assigned to read Salem’s Lot for one of your classes, but had ultimately just asked Shoko to give you a summary. 

Back then you’d been too invested in your fresh relationship with Ryu to focus on anything else, and that included reading. 

“Well, Misery is pretty good. I think you’ll enjoy it.” He leant back in his chair and popped an M&M in his mouth. “We should watch The Shining sometime, that one’s really good.” 

“No way. Too scary.” 

“Aw, if you get scared I can comfort you.” 

“Or we could just not watch the scary movie in the first place.” Horror movies had never really been your thing. You’d only agreed to watch Misery because Sukuna had explained that it was supposed to be more of a psychological thriller, but you knew that wasn’t the case with The Shining.

Sukuna hummed, gazing down at you with an amused glint in his eyes. “Don’t you think it's fun to be a little scared sometimes though? Gets the blood pumping.” 

While that statement might ring true for others, it certainly didn’t resonate with you. 

“I think I’ve had enough real fear to not want to be frightened by movies. I feel like you’re forgetting I saw my boyfriend with his guts all ripped out. I don’t need to watch shit like Scream when I literally had to live it.”

To some extent, the situation with Ryu had been more harrowing than the events in Scream, since they never caught the guy who did it to him. The police had concluded that it was some nasty drug related matter, since Ryu had cocaine on him, but you weren’t so sure. Some nights you wondered if the culprit was still living in your sleepy little town, going about their day like nothing ever happened. 

“Mmm. Point taken. What kind of movies do you like then?” He asked, keen to move the conversation away from Ryu. 

“Romance, I guess?” You weren’t really sure that you had a specific preference outside of disliking horror, but most of what you’d watched lately was romance. “I really like 10 things I hate about you.” 

“Haven’t seen it. You’ll have to show me sometime.” 

You giggled at the thought of Sukuna sitting down and watching a teen romance movie, but nodded anyway - mainly because you liked the idea of being huddled up next to him while watching Heath Ledger and Julia Stiles fall in love on screen. You wanted him to kiss you like the two of them kissed in that paintball field. 

“Sure, sometime.” 

The two of you fell quiet as the movie started, your attention dedicated to the screen in front of you. Sukuna was right to describe it as not really a horror, but he had neglected to point out how chilling a story it was. You felt all the fear of that poor man kept captive against his will by someone so insanely obsessed with him, your heart lurching anytime he failed to obey her ridiculous desires. 

During the scene where his legs were smashed by his captor, you found yourself covering your eyes, keen not to see the mess that she’d make of the poor man. Sukuna took that opportunity to wrap an arm around you, pulling you to his side and holding you there. His hand traced softly over the skin of your upper arm, comforting you. You stayed like that for the rest of the movie, enjoying the feeling of his warm body pressed against yours, his breath soft against the top of your head. 

You let out a breath of relief as the movie finally drew to a close, happy that the poor protagonist managed to escape the clutches of his captor, but deeply saddened by the way that the experience had messed with him mentally. In a way, you could relate - you understood what it felt like to have a traumatic experience colour your future. 

Sukuna didn’t let you go immediately, keeping you close as the credits rolled. Likewise, you made no effort to move away, even as cars started to vacate the lot. 

“What did you think?” He asked. 

“That lady was insane.” 

“I feel like she was just misguided,” Sukuna said with a laugh. “Sure, she needs therapy and stuff, but what she was doing was almost romantic.” 

You sat up then, staring at him in utter disbelief. The woman had held a celebrity author hostage in her house claiming to be his biggest fan, claiming to love him, only to smash up his legs and ensure that he could never be truly free of her. You weren’t quite sure where he was reading romance from that. 

“Wanna elaborate?” You asked, keen to see if Sukuna was just genuinely media illiterate. 

“Obviously not in a good way. I mean more that her drive felt almost romantic - to love someone so much to be driven to such insanity, it must’ve felt intense. I feel almost bad for her y’know? All she really wants is his attention but she can’t have it. It’s sad.” 

You scrunched up your nose. “I guess. But she isn’t entitled to him. She’s a psycho.” 

“Not arguing against that, baby.” 

The pet name didn’t go unnoticed, and you felt a blush crawling up your neck. Sukuna still hadn’t released you, drawing slow circles against your shoulder. It had your heart fluttering desperately, your stomach filled with butterflies. You tried not to focus on it too much, eager not to show just how much of an effect he was having on you. 

Mainly because you liked this game with him, to some extent. Even though you did want him, you were also enjoying having the upper hand, knowing that he was doing everything he could in his power to gain your affection. 

“So, if I hadn’t agreed to this date, would you have gone all Annie Wilkes on me? Kidnapped me and kept me strapped to a bed in your apartment?” You asked jokingly, staring up at him. 

“Nah,” he said with a laugh, “but if I did, I definitely would’ve treated you way better than she treated him. I wouldn’t be breaking your legs, I’d be treating you like a princess. I feel like that’s where she went wrong - she should’ve been softer on him and then he would’ve wanted to stay. It isn’t that hard.” 

You giggled. “I feel like you’re just describing a relationship - captivity aside, obviously. But I don’t think what you're saying would’ve worked for Annie, because he would’ve left and never come back. Which, you know, is good for him but not for her.” 

“I think she was just looking too short term.” Sukuna said with a sigh, giving you a soft squeeze. “She should’ve let him go and given him some time, kept in contact and stuff and maybe things would’ve blossomed. She was too hell bent on that instant gratification and it fucked everything up for her.” 

You hummed, and for a moment the two of you sat in silence, reflecting on the movie. You were certain that Sukuna wasn’t the type of guy to give into obsession like the woman in the movie. Likewise, you were certain that he wasn’t the type of guy who would ever hurt you or restrict your freedoms. 

But his final line felt like it related more directly to what had transpired between the two of you over the last few years. 

“Is that how you feel about us? About what happened four years ago?” 

He tilted his head in question, peering down at you. You couldn’t help the way that your stomach flipped under the scrutiny of those crimson irises, still a little nervous under his gaze, just like you’d always been. 

“What do you mean?” 

“That we were too fixated on instant gratification and it fucked everything up?” 

He barked out a laugh. “I wasn’t insinuating anything by it, but now that you mention it, yeah, I guess that applies to us.” Softly, he reached out to you, his fingers brushing along the length of your jaw. You bit down on your lip slightly, drawing in a breath. “Fortunately, nothing between us is as dire as broken legs or captivity, so I think we can recover.” 

You blinked as he leant in closer to you, lips slightly parted. His breath fanned over your face as he searched your eyes, clearly trying to get a read on you. Your mind was going haywire, your body freezing in place beneath his touch. 

“At least, if that’s what you want? I don’t wanna jump the gun and spend four more years on your avoidance list.” 

You snorted, eyelashes fluttering as you peered back at him. Your voice came out as a whisper, and barely audibly you said, “It is what I want.” 

He wasted no time after that admission, pulling you in close and crashing his lips into yours, stealing the breath from your lungs. His lips felt surprisingly soft, almost tender against yours. There was none of the roughness that you’d felt the first time the two of you had slept together, instead it was pure, unbridled passion. 

His tongue traced your lips carefully, requesting entry that you gave him easily. Your fingers found their way into the fabric of his hoodie, pulling him closer to you. The centre console between the two of you was an annoyance, creating a space that neither of you wanted. Sukuna was quick to resolve the issue, breaking the kiss for just a moment to drag you into his lap. 

His lips were back on yours immediately, like he was making up for lost time, desperate for you like a man in the desert searching for water. It wasn’t like you were much better, overwhelmed by the feeling of him pressed against you, dizzy with how hard he was kissing you. You hadn’t been kissed like that in a long time. 

Not since Sukuna had you in that bathroom all those years ago. 

It was a while before you parted for air, your forehead pressed against his, both of you breathing heavily. It was nice and warm in his lap, with one of his hands curled around your waist, the other caressing the skin of your thigh where your dress had ridden up a little. You could feel the evidence of his arousal through his jeans. 

Although, that evidence felt unnecessary, as the longing in his expression said it all. He was looking at you like you’d single-handedly placed all the stars in the night sky - like you were something truly worthy of his unwavering reverence. 

He was looking at you like he couldn’t quite believe how lucky he was. 

And it made your heart race, because despite your two relationships, despite all your forays into one night stands during your first year at university, no one had ever looked at you like Sukuna was now, with an affection so overwhelming that you weren’t quite sure what to make of it.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” he murmured, planting a few kisses on your face, his fingers rubbing circles into your skin. 

“I have some idea,” you said with a giggle, reflecting on the many nights that you’d spent fantasising about him over the past four years. 

“No,” he said sternly. “You really don’t.” The way that he looked at you told you that there was more desperation from his side than there was from yours, and you decided that you might as well take his word for it. Your mother had always said that it was ideal to find a man who was even more into you than you were into him. 

Your breath hitched as he slid his hand higher up your thigh, a pulse of desire going straight to your core at the idea of stripping off right here in his car. You could fuck in the front seat, let him fill you up as you sat so nicely on his lap. 

However, your last sexual experience with Sukuna had been in some impromptu awkward location, and you’d promised yourself that if you were ever going to do it again, you’d do things properly - in a place where you could take your time, free from any prying eyes. The front seat of his car certainly didn’t fit the bill - especially not with a few other cars still dotted about the lot. 

It was almost as if Sukuna read your mind. 

“So, do you want me to drop you home, or…” 

The statement hung heavy in the air and he grinned at you, intentionally trailing off and letting you fill in the gaps. He wanted you back at his apartment, wanted you to keep doing this with him and more. There was a reasonable part of you that thought you should turn him down - this was a first date, just a test, you should go on a few more before making any rash decisions. Not to mention, you’d barely broken up with Kashimo two weeks ago.

And yet, you found yourself completely unmoved by any logical argument that you presented to yourself. You wanted to go to Sukuna’s place, wanted him to touch you even more than he currently was.

It wasn’t like this was some first date with a guy you barely knew - you’d known him for seven or eight years now, knew him well enough to be sure that this was what you wanted. So why should you waste any time? 

You went on this date with him because you were ready to admit that you wanted him. Why bother with hesitation now? Besides, it wasn’t like the two of you hadn’t had sex before - now that you weren’t in a relationship, there was absolutely nothing stopping you from doing it again. 

Sometimes it’s best to throw caution to the wind. 

“Let’s go back to your place.” 

—

Sukuna lived on the east side of town in a relatively run-down area. It was the type of place that your parents had always warned you against visiting throughout your teenage years, mainly because it was known to be a hotbed for drug-related activity, and they didn’t want you caught up in such affairs. 

You felt safe enough with Sukuna at your side. He’d lived in the area his whole life, and was more than intimidating enough to scare off anyone who might have unsavory intent. You wished that your dad paid him better so that he could move to a nicer place somewhere else though - it wasn’t a good neighbourhood to be in. 

He pulled up outside his building, shutting off his truck and turning his attention to you. There was a desperately giddy look in his eyes, one that had you feeling more than a little flattered because you couldn’t quite comprehend the fact that he was so excited to be doing this.

Wasting no time, he led you inside, his hand tangled with yours, pulling you along up the stairs and into his home. It was a surprisingly neat little space, one that Sukuna had clearly taken good care of despite its sub-optimal location. You’d half feared that he’d have one of those average male living-space type apartments, with no furniture except a camping chair, a TV and a floor mattress. 

On the contrary, it was decorated nicely, with hints of his personality shining through in the furniture and other carefully selected decor. He released your hand for a moment to turn on some lamps, illuminating the room. A little side-tracked by your new environment, Sukuna hovered semi-impatiently as you thoroughly assessed the place. 

You felt like Sukuna was someone that you knew relatively well, but that didn’t decrease your interest in snooping - there was a lot to be learned about someone based on the way that they had their living space set up. The main thing that drew your attention was how many bookcases he had lining the walls, filled to the brim with a mix of books and DVDs. 

The fact that he was an avid reader didn’t really come as a surprise to you, since he always seemed knowledgeable whenever literature came up, but you were surprised by how many beautiful versions of books that he had, with so many of them clearly being collector’s editions. They must’ve been a priority to him, considering his fairly limited cashflow. 

Scanning the titles, it seemed like most of the books were horrors or thrillers, with a few sci-fi novels mixed in. That fit in with your general assessment of Sukuna’s likes - you couldn’t really imagine him reading some flowery romance or epic fantasy, he’d always seemed much more interested in the gritty stuff. 

“Nice collection.” 

“Thanks,” he responded, lip quirking upwards ever so slightly. If this were any other day or time, you were certain that he’d take his time talking you through the books that he owned, telling you all about them, no doubt recommending you some, just like he had when you’d been discussing Stephen King earlier that evening. 

Right now though, there was obviously something more pressing on his mind.

A slightly devious scheme that popped into your head was to play with him for a little while before giving him what he wanted - you figured that you could drag out the conversation about books or some other feature of his decor, really test his patience to the limit to see how long it would take him to snap. You doubted he wanted to wait long now that he was right on the precipice. 

But he was so impatient that he didn’t even give you a chance to put your plan into action, because one moment you were considering the best question to ask about Bram Stoker’s Dracula, and the next he was grabbing you and smashing his lips into yours once more. You gasped against him and he took that opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, picking up right where you’d left off in the car. 

Refusing to break the kiss, he walked you over to the couch, pulling you onto his lap as he sat down. The two of you made out for a little while, his hands roaming over your body, running tenderly along the skin of your thigh, beginning to play with the edge of the fabric, pushing it up your legs ever so slightly. 

It was then that you pulled away, a sly grin on your lips, still eager to tease him in some capacity. “Woah, straight to it with no conversation first?” You asked, with a cutesy tilt of your head. 

His face was a picture of disbelief and frustration, biting down on his lip softly as he stared up at you. The need in his crimson eyes was palpable, but he showed you restraint all the same. 

“What exactly would you like to talk about, baby?” He asked, in a clipped tone. 

He was painfully hard beneath you, and his fingers were digging into your thighs. You would’ve liked to have kept your act going a little longer, delay his gratification for at least ten minutes or so to really test his patience, but the desperation on his face was so cute that you couldn’t help but giggle at his question.

Besides, your own desire was bubbling in your gut, and you weren’t sure how much idle conversation you could hold without it turning into torture for you rather than him. 

“I’m just fucking with you,” you whispered with an airy laugh, leaning in to kiss him once more. He gave in for a second before pulling back, a devious glint in his eye. 

“Yeah? Think it’s funny to make me wait longer? Have your fun baby, I’ll put you in your place in due time.” You squealed with delight as he manhandled you down onto the couch, pinning you beneath his weight. His body felt warm on top of yours, skin tingling in his grip. It was the way you’d felt all those years ago, the first time he’d touched you. 

How could you have allowed your guilt to part you from this feeling for so long? 

Soft whines escaped your lips as he kissed down your neck, leaving a hot, wet trail of bites that he sucked so lovingly into your skin. You knew that he had a thing for leaving a mark - he’d done it all those years ago too, sucking a purple hickey onto your shoulder, claiming you as his own despite the fact that you’d belonged to another man. 

This time, there was no reason for you to stop him. There was no Ryu, no Kashimo, nothing to stand in the way of you letting Sukuna have exactly what he wanted. There was nothing standing in the way of you getting what you wanted. Because you did want it, you had for years. 

All of those nights picturing Sukuna on top of you like this weren’t some sort of mistake, they betrayed your deepest desires. Had Sukuna spent the last four years experiencing the same thing? Spending long nights imagining you beneath him, squirming in his grip? 

Perhaps he’d been imagining it for even longer than that. 

Either way, it felt foolish that you’d likely spent hundreds of nights in separate locations imagining being with the other. You and your foolish guilt towards a man who had shown you little to no respect. You should’ve never let Ryu come between you and Sukuna, should’ve never run after that terrifying night. 

If you’d simply had the courage to face Sukuna back then, maybe you wouldn’t have lost four years to your self-imposed suffering. 

A shiver ran through you at the feeling of Sukuna sliding the straps of your dress carefully down your arms. It wasn’t like he’d never seen you naked before, but you’d both been drunk that night in the bathroom. It felt different to be all exposed before him like this, completely sober, your nipples perky from all the attention he’d been giving you. 

Swallowing nervously, you watched him drag his gaze over your torso, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. “Aren’t you just an angel? Even prettier than I remembered.” The praise had your cheeks warm, your mind searching for the last time a compliment had been given to you so freely when having sex. 

It was probably the last time Sukuna had been with you. Ryu had never done anything to make you feel special, and Kashimo had largely kept quiet the handful of times you had been together. With Sukuna, the words seemed to come easily, like praising you was the most natural thing in the world for him. 

Throwing your head back, your fingers sunk into Sukuna’s biceps as he made his way down to your breasts, lips brushing against the sensitive skin until his mouth reached one of your nipples. His tongue was warm as it flicked against that hardened bud, teasing you for a few moments before wrapping his lips around it and sucking. 

The feeling went straight to your core, and you writhed beneath him in pleasure. One of his hands moved to your other breast, his thumb toying with the nipple, leaving you overwhelmed with the dual sensation. “Fuck, Sukuna-” 

“Feel good?” He asked, pulling back with a pop. He looked beautiful, looking up at you in the way that he was. You couldn’t understand why someone as handsome as him had been so deadset on your affection - four years was a long time to wait for anyone, and yet here he was, gazing up at you as if you were worth everything. 

“Really good.” 

He huffed, shimmying your dress further down your body, leaving a trail of kisses in its wake. “All your resistance, for what? Could've been making you feel good for years, dumbass.” 

You made an attempt to bite back, to point out that it hadn’t been quite that simple, because how were you meant to understand what the right path was after seeing your boyfriend murdered in cold blood? 

How could you have known that the man you’d been unfaithful with was the right person to seek comfort in after everything? 

It wasn’t like there was a handbook for that. 

Sukuna didn’t give you enough time to formulate that into words before his hands reached the top of your panties, sliding his fingers beneath them with little hesitation. You jolted ever so slightly at the sensation of his warmth against your sensitive skin, flushing at the way he grinned as his fingers discovered the slick between your thighs. 

“And here I thought I was the desperate one.” 

“Shut up,” you mumbled. It was clear that he paid you no mind, suddenly attentive, as if he’d just had an epiphany. 

“Do you always wear these?” He asked, his hand pulling back and moving to trail along the pink, lacy panties you were wearing. They were the nicest pair that you had, and they weren’t particularly comfortable. Generally, you wouldn’t wear that at all, apart from for something like this. 

Sukuna cottoned on too quickly for your liking, practically beaming down at you. 

“Don’t tell me, you’d planned for us to do this tonight? Here I was, thinking that you were playing things all innocent, that you were genuine when you told me that this was just a test-run of a date.” His fingers toyed with the fabric a little more, watching your reaction carefully. “I guess you were just teasing me, huh? You always knew you were gonna come back here.” 

You shrugged as nonchalantly as you could. “I wasn’t sure, I just figured it was better to be safe than sorry on the outfit front.” 

“Mmm, sure.” It was clear that he didn’t believe you for even a moment. “These are so cute, I almost don’t wanna take them off you.” 

His fingers had moved slowly to your clit, rubbing softly over the top of the fabric. You wished that he'd go back to what he was doing before, eager to remove the thin layer of fabric separating you. 

“Gonna have to take them off though,” he continued, “I want full access when you sit on my face.” Your heart stuttered for a second at his words, not quite sure that you’d heard him correctly. 

“What?” You asked, dumbly.

“I want you to sit on my face,” he repeated, easily, as if it were obvious. You blinked at him, a little taken aback by the request. That wasn’t something you’d done before - Ryu hadn’t been all that interested in giving oral sex if he could avoid it, and everything you’d done with Kashimo had sat firmly on the tame side of things. 

“That’s- I- I think I’d be too embarrassed,” you choked out, cheeks flushing red. It was one thing to have sex with him - you were even comfortable with him giving you oral, but to do it in a manner like that felt insanely vulnerable, especially to do with a man that you hadn’t slept with in four years. 

He didn’t seem deterred by your statement, his face still lit up with that giddy, elated expression which had barely faltered since you’d kissed in his truck. “You know, if you’re gonna be with me, we’re gonna do far more embarrassing things together than just that.” 

Heart fluttering at the implication, you let your mind wander to what those things might be. Sukuna had always been the type of person who gave off the impression that he knew what he was doing when it came to sex - his penchant for one night stands had been the reason you’d never believed that he’d really wanted you before you’d gotten together with Ryu.

You were pretty certain that he had an expansive list of favoured kinks, and the idea of him trying them out with you made you shiver. It wasn’t like you’d ever ventured far out of vanilla with past partners, but Sukuna seemed like he’d be unsatisfied with basic sex alone.

“Come on, baby. Wanna see you up close.” The lust in his tone had your thighs quivering, and despite the embarrassment of it all, you offered him a little nod. You wanted him to make you feel good, wanted to feel that tongue piercing of his pressed up against you. 

You watched him lay back on the sofa, discarding his shirt and gesturing you over to him. His body was still as well-sculpted as you remembered, with sharp black lines cascading down his clearly-defined abs. He was the type of guy that you’d expect to see in a magazine, not working on some dingy construction site. 

Trailing your eyes down his form, you couldn’t tear your gaze away from the pink happy trail rising from his jeans, following it down to the prominent bulge practically begging to be freed from his trousers. Tentatively, your hand reached for it, squeezing gently through the cloth, pulling a restrained moan from Sukuna’s mouth. 

His reaction gave you an unprecedented surge of confidence. 

“If I’m going to sit on your face, perhaps we can kill two birds with one stone.” Your smile was sultry as you addressed him, wetting your lips slowly and giving him yet another squeeze to ensure that he caught your meaning. You’d expected him to jump at the idea, thrilled at the thought of you taking him in your mouth while he ate you out. 

Instead, his hand darted out and gripped your wrist, pulling your hand away from his still covered cock. You tilted your head in question, eyes wide with surprise at just how tightly he was gripping you. “No. I won’t last. If I’m gonna cum I want to do it inside you.” 

Most guys would feel embarrassed to admit to such a thing, but evidently not Sukuna. He didn’t care that you were aware of just how intense his desire was for you, on the contrary, he wanted you to know. You had to admit that it was flattering, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to control himself if you started touching him. 

You weren’t used to being in a situation where a guy wanted to focus on your pleasure first, before even thinking about chasing his own. Although, going by the enthusiasm in Sukuna’s eyes as you slowly got yourself into position above him, it seemed like he was deriving great pleasure simply from serving you. 

His hands ran slowly along your thighs, caressing your skin and tugging you down to sit upon his face. You felt a little nervous, shivering at the sensation of his hot breath against your exposed pussy. You weren’t sure what to do with yourself, having never been in this position before, uncertain on what to do with your hands as Sukuna licked a broad stripe up your slick folds. 

“Oh!” You let out a little squeak, legs trembling. Your hands flew to his hair, finding solace in the pink strands, no doubt tugging on his scalp as he set to work lavishing you with attention. You’d been eaten out before, Sukuna had done it to you all those years ago, kneeling between your thighs while you leant up against the sink. But this felt different - more intimate and special than it had before. 

The mix of embarrassment at being so vulnerable and the intensity of Sukuna’s optimal position had you fidgeting desperately, your body jolting ever so slightly at every pass of his wide tongue, leaving no part of you untouched. One of his hands released its grip on your thigh to move to your clit, rubbing that sensitive bundle of nerves in tandem with his tongue’s careful ministrations. 

The way that he flicked his tongue so precisely told you that he knew exactly what he was doing, understood how to touch you to elicit the strongest reaction. More slick was dripping from you, lapped up enthusiastically by his mouth, and you found yourself whining desperately at the sensation of that round piercing skimming your folds, contrasting against the soft texture of his tongue. 

“So sweet.” He murmured against your pussy, the vibration sending a pleasurable jolt right up your spine. You could feel the pressure building in your gut as he continued to lap at you, giving you no respite, feasting like a man starved. How long had he been waiting for this? Did he look at pictures of you when he was alone at night and imagine you sitting on him like this? 

If it was possible, the thought turned you on more than you already were. 

You could feel yourself growing close, the fuzzy feeling in your stomach growing to near unbearable levels, your vision growing a little blurry as you chanced a look down at him. The sight took your breath away - his eyes were heavy-lidded, watching you unfold on top of him while his tongue continued its onslaught, a heavenly expression on his face. 

You found yourself choking out his name, a little overcome by the evidence of his desire. 

It had you coming unexpectedly, letting out a soft little moan as you released on his face, causing a surge of embarrassment and pleasure to meld together in one overwhelming ball of sensation. Ultimately, the pleasure won out, because unconsciously you found yourself grinding down against his face, moving your hips with a desperate vigor to chase more of what he was giving you. 

If it was suffocating to him, he did nothing to try and stop you. Instead, he seemed to revel in your active participation, the movement of his tongue never faltering, letting you ride out your orgasm to completion. You couldn’t quite believe how eager he was, memories of Ryu’s general disinterest with eating you out flashing through your mind. Sukuna didn’t have to be asked to provide you with pleasure - he wanted to provide it. 

When he finally released you, bruises left in his wake from his grip on your thighs, your head was spinning. A sheen of sweat had summoned itself on your forehead, your pussy tingling from the overstimulation. You couldn’t find it in yourself to move on your own, your legs acting like they were made of jelly. 

It didn’t matter, because Sukuna was more than happy to lift you, depositing you down onto his couch for a second. He shot you an impish grin as he stood up, undoing his belt and shedding his jeans. “Still with me, baby?” He asked, taking note of your dazed expression. 

You were pretty sure you nodded, but you were too preoccupied to give him a proper answer, all of your attention focused on his hands, which were slowly dragging his boxers down his muscular thighs. 

The first time you’d done this, you hadn’t really gotten a good look at him - between the alcohol and the fact that he had you positioned facing the mirror, you’d only had the chance to feel his size rather than witness it. Now that you were staring at him, you found yourself swallowing nervously at the sight, wondering just how you’d taken that before. 

“Aw, don’t look so worried, baby,” he purred. His hand was stroking the shaft idly, red eyes heavy-lidded as he fixed them on you. “I’ll let you have it nice and slow. Nothing but the best for my princess.” 

No words came to your mind, you found yourself staring at him dumbly, lips parted as he settled down on the couch beside you, his thighs spread. He was watching you with a smile, patting his leg invitingly, encouraging you over. 

“Come here.” 

On shaky legs, you shuffled yourself over, letting Sukuna’s hands grip your hips and help lift you back into his lap. A soft whine fell from your lips at the feeling of his cock pressing up against you. He let out a low laugh at the way that you instinctively ground yourself against him, your body needy even after everything he’d already given you. 

“Aren’t you just the sweetest thing?” He hummed, watching your movements carefully. “You really want it, huh?” Gripping his cock, he responded to your movements in kind, rubbing the tip up against your entrance, smearing the pre-cum through your folds. 

“A-ah, condom.” You just about managed to regain clarity of mind to remember that little detail. Even though you were on birth control pills, you were intelligent enough to know that it wasn’t wise to fuck anyone without one if they hadn’t been tested for STDs and the like. 

Even if it was Sukuna. 

The flicker of irritation in his eyes was gone as soon as it appeared, replaced by a more pleasant look of total innocence. “I don’t have one,” he said easily. “I can just get you the morning after pill if you’re worried.” 

You shook your head. “I take contraception, it's more about- umm…”

“I haven’t fucked anoyone since I was with you.” 

You blinked at him a few times, struggling to comprehend that statement and instantly wondering if he was lying to you. The claim seemed unlikely, considering how much he got around before he’d slept with you for the first time, but his expression was unexpectedly earnest. 

And he’d been nothing but honest with you up to now. 

“In four years?”

“You’re the only one I want.” He was chewing on his lip, waiting to see how you’d react - if you’d believe him. The two of you hadn’t used a condom last time, you’d been so frazzled by everything going on that it had completely slipped your mind - if he really hadn’t been with anyone since then, it didn’t matter if you used one now. 

“You’re not just saying that so you can still fuck me tonight, are you?” 

“Come on, baby. Can’t you see how devoted I am to you?” He started pressing soft kisses along your neck, peppering the bruises he’d already left on your skin. “After I’d had you for the first time, there was no way I was ever gonna touch another woman again.” 

You weren’t sure what to make of that, once again caught off guard by how strong his affection for you was. You hadn’t assumed that he’d put his sex life on hold in the hopes that you’d one day come back, but now all of his neediness made sense. Not being touched for four years must’ve been tough for a guy like him. 

Who were you to keep him waiting any longer? 

Sliding your hand down between the two of you, your fingers found his cock, feeling it twitch in your grip. He relaxed a little, clearly relieved that you were proceeding, eagerly watching you line up the tip with your pussy. His hands came to settle on your hips once more, gently guiding you as you eased yourself down onto his cock. 

Containing a whimper, your nails dug hard into his shoulders. He felt bigger than you remembered, your body no longer assisted by the effects of alcohol to numb the pain like the first time you’d done this. “That’s it, good girl,” he murmured, bringing one hand up to your hair in a gentle caress. 

Leaning forward, he kissed you some more, his lips moving along your neck, up to your chin and finally capturing your lips, distracting you from the intensity of the stretch as he bottomed out within you. 

The two of you stayed like that for a few moments, losing yourself in the feeling of his lips on yours, the soft feeling of his chest pressed tight against your breasts. The pain slowly began to give way to pleasure, turning into a delightful feeling of closeness with the man you’d been more desperate for than you liked to admit. 

You were the one to move your hips first, lifting yourself experimentally, finding joy in the way that his cock dragged against your walls, before dropping yourself down once more with a soft whine against his lips. He took that as a sign of your comfort, repositioning his hands on your hips 

Considering the position, you’d assumed that you’d be doing most of the work. You’d thought that Sukuna had chosen it intentionally, eager to make you please him after all the pleasure he’d gifted you with his tongue. But instead of sitting back and watching you ride him, he made it clear that he was still very much in control of the situation. 

His grip on you was firm, taking care of moving you up and down his shaft like you weighed nothing to him. All you had to do was hang onto his shoulders. Pulling away from his lips, overwhelmed by the new, intense feeling of him thrusting into you, you buried your face into the crook of his neck, whining each time he brought his hips up to meet yours. 

The feeling was heavenly, better than anything you’d experienced before. It felt like you were moulded just for this, made for him to fit inside you so snugly, like you were always meant to be together. 

“Fuck, been waiting so long for this-” The way that he groaned was insanely sexy, filling you with a sense of pride. Based on gossip that you’d heard before doing anything with Sukuna, girls he’d been with had claimed that he was quiet during sex, that he opted for positions where he wouldn’t be looking at their faces. 

And yet here he was, all vocal for you, gazing at you with round eyes. 

It was definitely an ego boost. 

“You’re so hot, I wanna have you like this all the time, shit- I’m not gonna last long.” 

A mewl of agreement escaped you. You were already so sensitive from him eating you out, your pussy squeezing needily around him with each stroke of his thick cock. You were pretty sure that you’d never cum this fast in your life, not without external stimulation at least. And yet, Sukuna’s cock felt good enough to get you there all on its own.

“Please, Sukuna-” you whined against his shoulder, sinking your teeth into his skin at one particularly deep thrust, keeping yourself from wailing out his name. You couldn’t think of anything but how good he felt buried inside you, desperate to do this over and over again. 

But Sukuna was reaching his limit, and your little love bite was what tipped him over the edge. 

Your name left his lips in a soft groan, his grip on your hips tightening as he filled you up. The last time you’d done this, you’d asked him to pull out, but no such thought had crossed your mind this time around. The sensation of warmth flooding inside you all while he kept up his rhythm was too much for you. 

“Cum for me, pretty girl,” he rasped against your ear. One of his hands shifted down from your hip and pressed softly against your clit, the feather light touch sending you right to your peak along with him. Your vision turned white as your orgasm washed over you, your thighs tensing against his, milking his cock for all it was worth. 

Riding out your high, you slowly came to still on top of him, gaping for breath against his shoulder. He recovered faster than you did - one of his hands was already steadily tracing your back, the other stroking your hair comfortingly. He was softening ever so slightly inside of you, but you weren’t eager to pull away just yet. 

The intimacy of being connected like you were just felt too pleasant. 

Sukuna seemed to feel the same, making no effort to rush any further movement, enjoying the sound of the two of you breathing softly, clinging tightly to the other. You’d never felt so safe in someone's arms after making love, had never wanted to stay tangled up like this. Sukuna was special - he always had been, you’d just been too scared to admit it. 

You’d wanted him to hold you four years ago, and unfortunate events had dictated otherwise. This time, you’d let nothing tear you apart. 

“Doing okay?” He asked, brushing hair out of your face and tilting your chin up to meet his gaze. 

“Mmm, just a little tired.” You felt downright exhausted, and even though you knew that you should probably go home to prevent any suspicion coming from your father’s direction, the last thing you wanted was to be parted from Sukuna’s comforting grip. 

“Let's get you to bed then.” 

He didn’t wait for your answer before standing up, keeping you wrapped around him as he walked over to what you assumed was the bedroom, pushing the door open and depositing you gently on the bed. It was only then that he pulled out of your warmth, dragging a soft whimper from you at the cold emptiness he left behind. 

You remembered zoning out for a while after that, while Sukuna went through the process of tenderly cleaning you up with a warm cloth before bundling you up beneath the duvet on his comfortable bed. He went to the bathroom for a while to get himself cleaned up before joining you, huddling his body up close against yours. 

“Are you gonna avoid me for another four years now?” He asked quietly, a teasing lilt to his voice. Even if it was a joke, you were almost certain that there was some level of fear hiding within him that had prompted him to ask the question. You didn’t know how he’d react if he woke up in the morning to find your side of the bed cold and empty. 

“No, not after that.” 

“Oh, so you would’ve done it if the sex was bad?” 

“Maybe.” You let out a giggle, gazing up at him with amusement. 

He rolled his eyes but there was no malice behind it, a lazy grin lighting up his tattooed face. “I guess I’ll have to make sure I always please you then.” 

“I guess so!” You chirped, as if Sukuna was capable of anything less than that. It was apparent that you were not seeing him at the top of his game right now with how needy he was for release, and you could only imagine the type of things he would do once you were having sex all the time. 

He huffed humorously against your ear, tightening his grip on you. He had one arm resting beneath your head while the other snaked firmly around your waist, pulling your face into his chest. It was hard to think about anything but him with the way that his scent was overpowering your nose. 

You could get used to being pressed up against him like that. 

Things just felt right with you there, snuggled up in his arms. His body felt so warm against yours, curled around you in a deeply protective grip, like he was ready to fend off the world to keep you there at his side. You were relatively certain that he’d have to do no such thing, but you liked the sentiment regardless. 

You’d been wrong in your judgement, in your decision to wallow in guilt after Ryu’s death. You hadn’t felt this happy in years, since long before you were ever even with Ryu. Sukuna was the person you were meant to be with, this was exactly where you’d been destined to be. 

Everything that had happened, it had all been for a reason. All the horrible things that you’d gone through had been the world’s way of helping you along to this moment, leading you into the arms of the person you were meant to be with. 

And as you drifted off in the arms of the man who had loved you for years, you felt like you’d found a place of peace, a place where you’d be safe from the horrors that you’d encountered throughout your life. 

You’d drifted off too quickly, too soundly, to see the glint of victory in Sukuna’s eyes, to feel the way that his nails dug so possessively into your delicate skin. For now, he had what he’d always wanted - his object of affection tangled up so intimately with him. 

All he needed to do was ensure that he kept you there. 

And he wouldn’t be taking any chances. 

next chapter

a/n: isn't he so fine!? I'm sure he'll be a totally normal boyfriend!! there's no way that he'd immediately start crossing boundries and acting insanely possessive haha!!

(we'll be going back to sukuna's pov for the next chapter where he will immediately start crossing boundries and acting possessive 😭)

hope you enjoyed the chapter and thank you for the support! comments and reblogs are appreciated as always! <3

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I'LL BE YOUR PLASTIC TOY

HEAVEN CANNOT WAIT FOREVER

TOO SOFT TO CHEW

EYES WITHOUT A FACE

NOT THAT I'M ANYWHERE

IF ONLY IT WAS WARMTH

TOO YOUNG TO GROW WINGS

TERMINAL PARADISE

GOD IS A CIRCLE

WORKING FOR THE KNIFE

POISON ROOT

LOOKING FOR THE NEW WORLD

TEGAMI

HALF RETURN

HUMMINGBIRD

CUPID'S CHOKEHOLD

FORCE OF NATURE

VACILLATOR

FLOWERS OF BLOOD

PULSE ROT

TEMPEST

AWAKENING

COVENANT

SAMSARA

Disclaimers:

♤ COMPLETED

♤ Available on AO3 but is currently three chapters behind.

♤ This is a mix of fluff, smut and angst, so minors/ageless blogs do not interact.

♤ Any comments hating on the reader in this story will be deleted and the user will be blocked. The story plays on the mean girl trope so you will see mean girl behaviour. Just know this is all intentional. If you are sensitive to a flawed female character, do not read. I know what some of you are like. I have played these games before.

♤ This is a college au separate from my EdenU au. Different Gojo and university setting altogether. Any semblance is coincidental.

♤ Every part of this is of my own work. No AI or external inspiration was used. Please do not repost this on Tumblr or on any other platform without credits. I do not give permission for this to be translated. And please do not feed my work into AI.