Distant Eqo's

You know that feeling when you’re throwing up? That uncontrollable release, where you want it to stop but you know you can’t, and you’re just gonna have to suffer through it? I wonder if that’s how clouds feel when they rain...

Cat: "So, uh, are you gonna feed me or... Cause I'm like STARVING over here." Me: "There's still food in your bowl." Cat: "Yeah, but I can SEE the bottom." Me: "You have food." Cat: "ANIMAL CRUELTY!"

Arachnophobia: The belief that spiders are out to get you, instead of, you know, being afraid of you because you're FUCKING HUGE.

Moon don’t care. Moon does what it wants.

Me walking in a large funeral procession: "This is the saddest parade I've ever seen..." *Cups hands around mouth* "BRING OUT THE FLOATS!"

I'm the kind of person who needs their windshield as clear as possible, so in the rain/snow I turn my wipers on to whatever speed setting they need to be on to keep visibility at a maximum. But then, Sometimes... I purposefully put them on a lower setting to let the water droplets build up on the windshield BECAUSE it bugs me. What the fuck is my problem?

I'm not the "lightbulb idea" kind of person. Bing! "I have an idea!" No. I have more like... idea lava. It just sort of splurbs out of my head in a hot, ideaish mess. None of it is particularly useful and it most likely destroyed a nearby village on its way to wherever it was going... But let me tell ya, Those little burning village huts melting into the ground, an old lady or something screaming inside, those babies burn a whole lot brighter than your little lightbulb.

I've always had a hard time telling the difference between *gurgle* "Oh, I need food." And *gurgle* "Ugh, don't talk about food.." Which is why I pull food out of the fridge and stare at it. It's either Stomach: "Put it in me." Or Stomach: "Get that away from me."

Yeah :D

Alternate theory: Jason: “Fuck! He found my second heart!”

Hey tumblr, I did a thing! Like pokemon? Like ridiculous hardcore gangsta beats? Like mixing things that may or may not need mixing? I give you: Just the Kip.