lemons and stuff

i love the fact that like… if you wanted to you could throw a chair… stool…. lamp… medium sized houseplant… even a lightweight table…. theres nothing physically stopping you from throwing furniture around, only social constructs and your own cowardice.

also i got a tiny rubber baby for 95¢

Who is going to tell men that repeating phrases from popular television shows and hating female celebrities isn’t a personality

Bazinga

Highly cursed yet perfect comment

abt me: glowing, eating peaches drinking wine in lingerie, not texting ur desperate ass back

Abt me: acne on my chin, eating an unflavored rice cake in the dress I wore yesterday , reading thru texts my ex sent me a year ago

make your own foot scrub

white boys be like “im gonna make you come so hard” and ur like, what to my senses

If depression was a musical

This is a bop

okay but this person’s comedic timing is insane