it’s not that hard is it?

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@ending-story
it’s not that hard is it?

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Why I Can’t Stand iDubbbzTV
Before you say anything, at least hear me out for the first few sentences. I’m not asking you to even care, so if you’re a fan of his you should probably click away now. I’m not some mindless troll hating on a popular youtuber just because I found one little thing they said kind of offensive. I don’t find him that offensive, he’s just kind of... sad.
Here’s what I mean: when I look at iDubbbbz I see in him a reflection of our entire generation. He’s like a horrible representation of every reason why my mom tells me I should spend less time on my laptop. At the end of the day, iDubbbz is just a twenty-something sitting in front of a camera and bitching about inconsequential shit that’ll be meaningless in a few short years or even months. He has no legacy, and he makes no contributions. He’s barely even memorable.
When he gets older – when he turns thirty and goes from being the quirky, “offensive,” little boy attacking other quirky, “offensive” little boys over the internet to a weird creep living alone, making a mess and bullying college dropouts, who will stand by him? When your precious little Ian stops appealing to you and you move on, will you leave him to keep spouting his tiny little voice into the uncaring abyss of the internet? Cause god knows that potential, NORMAL future employers are gonna pick a guy whose resume doesn’t include that he once painted himself entirely orange for a couple million youtube views.
I don’t dislike his content. In fact, I even find him a little bit funny at times, but in the end he just makes me kind of depressed. Feel free to respond to me about why I’m wrong and how you still wanting to fuck him when he turns 50 is an excuse to pretend he’s still going to be relevant.
maybe you MILLENIALS would be able to afford a house if you stopped spending your money at your local diner’s jukebox buying twenty one (21) plays of what’s new pussycat with one (1) play of it’s not unusual in the middle
even with those four numbers there are countless possible combinations good luck with figuring out which one is the right one you punk
*straightens calculator*
It’s pretty likely that it’s a four digit number, and as there are four digits chosen there, that means that there cannot be any repetition. This mean that there are:
n!/(n-4)! possible orders. As ‘n’ is 4 (number of digits available). 4!/0! which becomes 4x3x2x1/1 which simplifies to 24. That means that there are 24 possible combinations of codes. This would take you about two or three minutes to input all possible codes.
Unless an alarm goes off if you don’t get it right in 3 tries
*straightens calculator again*
Kick the fucking door in
well ‘technically’ the code is most likley 1970. statistically, a majority of people, when told to choose a 4 digit code will choose their birth year. and this key pad is obviously a few years old to put it nicely, thats most likley it.
some sherlock holmes shit just went down over here
No, no, no. Don’t base your deductions of psychology. Let’s talk chemistry. When you first press a button, there’s more of the natural oils on your skin, and therefore it wears down the numbers on the keys faster. Obviously 0 is the first one, then. Try 0791 first.
Sherlock out.
it got better
and this is why the sherlock fandom could either rule the world or end it….
Close, but not quite, I think. People will almost always choose a number they can remember. What’s memorable about 0791? Try 0719 - a birthday, 19th of July. That is more likely.
Those deductions are great and all, but unnecessary.
The light is green.
The door is already open.
And that’s why we have a John Watson.
This is “top 10 favorite posts” level.
Omg, it’s actually on my dash! This post is like a fossil!
guys google it it’s real
it's not even a meme this time!

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prompt 858
Kurt Vonnegut’s Advice on Short Stories
1. Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.
2. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.
3. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.
4. Every sentence must do one of two things—reveal character or advance the action.
5. Start as close to the end as possible.
6. Be a sadist. No matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them—in order that the reader may see what they are made of.
7. Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.
8. Give your readers as much information as possible as soon as possible. To heck with suspense. Readers should have such complete understanding of what is going on, where and why, that they could finish the story themselves, should cockroaches eat the last few pages.
The greatest American short story writer of my generation was Flannery O’Connor (1925-1964). She broke practically every one of my rules but the first. Great writers tend to do that.
–Kurt Vonnegut, preface to Bagombo Snuff Box
Contemplations On The Line At Trader Joe's
6:00 PM Sunday
This line is so long - it reminds me of that line in that Starbucks that one time. Is that cereal? My mom never lets me buy cereal. God, the things I would do for yogurt O-s…
6:02 PM Sunday
This lady in front of me should move. Why is there so much juice in her cart? I’m going to count them. 1… 2… 3… Who the hell enjoys pomegranate juice? Is there a juice charity? There’s no way someone shopping at Trader Joe’s could have enough friends to drink that much juice.
6:02:30 PM Sunday
Shit! I didn’t mean to hit her, I was distracted! No, don’t turn around! What kind of look is that? No, I’m not here by myself my mom’s getting salmon. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry.
6:05 PM Sunday
Yeah, this is still the line, what does it look like you idiot! No, we’re just doing the conga in the middle of Trader Joe’s at 6 PM on Sunday evening! WHY IS EVERYONE ASKING ME IF THIS IS STILL THE LINE?!
6:07 PM Sunday
Time for a line break! Line one or line 2? I bet 2.. it’s a better number really - even and all that stuff. 2, 2, 2. Better cross my fingers..
6:07:25 PM Sunday
Really? Line 1? What kind of mind games is this lady playing?
6:09 PM Sunday
Mom’s back. Should I ask her if we can get sunflower seeds? I mean they have a lot of salt but they’re so good, and dad likes them too… I guess I don’t have time to weight pros and cons of sunflower seeds. I’ll just ask… YES! Woo! I love sunflower seeds!
6:12 PM Sunday
Time for the second line break - green grapes, yellow cheese or red pepper? I should start a tally of how many times I get each of these. I feel like I’m always getting red pepper - I don’t mind it but I think yellow cheese would be nice. Plus, yellow cheese has the trail mix in its line divider. Okay, let’s hope for yellow cheese.
6:12:10 PM Sunday
Why do they name their lines after food anyways? It’s stupid.
6:12:45 PM Sunday
Ugh, green grapes. I don’t even like grapes. Seeds are gross.
6:14 PM Sunday
Okay we’re next… which cashier are we going to get? There are so many! What’s that last one… 30! 30 cashiers! Whole Foods only has like 12 and half of them are out - this place most cost a FORTUNE to run… I mean, 30 cashiers!
6:15 PM
Cashier 27.
A Review of the Grand Army Passport Office (In the Style of The New Yorker)
What is it exactly about the Grand Army Passport Office that draws in almost everyone in New York City? Perhaps it’s because it’s literally the only option for hundreds of people – but I think it’s something more. Tucked away in the corner of a large library, the office has a special quality about it. It’s like some sort of sadness has been massaged into each plastic chair, leaving the place quiet and somber. The refusal of other offices around the city to retain the traditional style of passport processing – no appointments, no computer, just one person working, and a general lack of efficiency – means that Grand Army is one of the few places you can visit to get a taste of how passports used to be processed back before computers and all the other gadgets that consume our lives.
Let it be noted that adults aren’t required to visit in person, so each family visiting is dragging along at least one unhappy child with them. Adventurous visitors may wish to sample a slice of pie from four-and-twenty blackbirds, a pie shop located within the library, because of course a good slice of key lime may tide over the 2 to 3 hour wait until admittance to the office. Lines often exceed it’s capacity, and the wait to get in can be up to 200 minutes.
Option range from 15-155 dollars

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Daisy word portrait.
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Great Gatsby Word Portrait
#when you say something in a group chat and nobody replies