#fightme

Two Roswells, One Michael & Maria — And the Version We Never Got

Being wildly unpopular might actually be my favorite sport at this point.

Every time I write something like this, I fully expect at least three people to be ready to fight me in the tags. But here’s the thing: I don’t write to be attacked. I write because I genuinely love open, honest, civil conversations. I like contrasting opinions. I just prefer them without digital pitchforks.

So.

Today’s Ship Scream is about Michael and Maria.

Both versions.

Yes. We’re doing this.

The Two Roswells

I watched both:

Roswell (1999–2002)

Roswell, New Mexico (2019–2022)

And yes, I liked both. They’re similar, but they feel very different — and you can feel the twenty-year gap between them.

Both are inspired by the Roswell High novels by Melinda Metz, though neither adaptation is fully faithful. I never read the books (they weren’t published in Italy), so my attachment is entirely television-based.

And in both shows, my ship was the same:

Michael Guerin and Maria DeLuca.

Roswell (1999): The Heat Wave That Started It All

Let’s start with the original.

Teenage Michael and Maria were pure enemies-to-lovers chaos.

The turning point? “Heat Wave” (1x09). The hormonal spike. The uncontrollable attraction. The kisses that didn’t stop. Maria hiding hickeys under a sleeveless turtleneck like it was peak Y2K drama.

That was iconic.

What I loved about them in the original Roswell was the tension. The friction. They were opposites. They clashed constantly. But the chemistry? Explosive.

Seasons 1 and 2 built them beautifully. Especially Season 2, which I still think is the show’s peak (Alex’s death, Tess’s arc — that was the emotional core).

But Season 3?

That’s where things fell apart.

The show struggled with post-high school storytelling. The energy shifted. Some character choices didn’t land (Isabel’s marriage to Jessie still confuses me). And Michael and Maria suffered from that instability.

They were living together. Stable. Settled.

But suddenly it felt like Michael was complacent while Maria wanted more — music, growth, independence.

And instead of deepening their maturity, the show kind of fumbled it.

By the finale, they reunite — but it feels rushed. Like boxes being checked to give everyone a happy ending.

So in the original:

I loved how they started.

I loved their teenage intensity.

I didn’t love how their adult arc was handled.

Roswell, New Mexico: The Mature Version… With Complications

Now we move to the reboot.

And here’s where I might lose some of you.

First: Michael being bisexual was not my issue.

Let me be very clear about that.

My discomfort wasn’t about sexuality. It was about narrative balance.

In Roswell, New Mexico, Michael’s relationship with Alex is deeply developed. Their high school history is emotional, layered, painful. I actually liked it. A lot.

Michael hiding his healed hand because Alex still sees him as injured? That’s beautiful storytelling.

But here’s the structural issue: Alex’s death in the original Roswell was foundational. It reshaped the group. It reshaped Isobel. It altered dynamics permanently.

In Roswell, Alex’s death fractures everything.

In Roswell, New Mexico, that role is replaced with Rosa (Liz’s sister). And while Rosa is interesting, she never quite carries the same emotional gravitational weight.

The ripple effects are different.

And that changes everything.

The Michael/Maria/Alex Triangle

Now we get to the part that really didn’t work for me.

The threesome scene.

I’m sorry. I know. I know.

But narratively? It felt like Michael trying to stand in two emotional worlds at once.

If he wants Alex — choose Alex.

If he wants Maria — choose Maria.

But that “foot in both worlds” energy diluted the emotional clarity.

And it weakened what could’ve been a powerful adult Michael/Maria arc.

Because here’s the thing:

I actually loved Michael Vlamis and Heather Hemmens as Michael and Maria.

They feel mature. Grounded. Adult. Their dynamic in Season 1 especially had that familiar enemies-to-lovers spark, but with lived-in weight.

And that’s where my frustration lives.

My Unpopular Take

If I could fuse both versions, I would.

I’d take:

The mature writing and adult depth of Roswell, New Mexico.

The slow-burn emotional commitment of Seasons 1–2 of the original Roswell.

Because what worked best in the original was this: Michael and Maria were the counterpoint to Max and Liz.

Max/Liz were destiny. Soulmate energy. Almost mythic.

Michael/Maria were friction. Fire. Constant collision.

They weren’t poetic. They were volatile.

But in that volatility, there was real love.

And I wanted that same trajectory in the reboot.

Instead, in both versions, I loved how it started… and struggled with how it ended.

So yes.

My perfect Michael and Maria doesn’t exist.

It’s a mash-up.

Original Roswell’s emotional arc. Roswell, New Mexico’s adult depth. A bisexual Michael with a meaningful past — but a decisive emotional present.

That, to me, would’ve been perfect.

So now I’m asking you:

Which Michael and Maria did you prefer? The chaotic Y2K version? The mature reboot version? Or are you Team Michael/Alex?

And please — let’s argue like adults.

Day 28 Fav AU - Fae

fight me

For centuries, men were men, women were women, and nobody had a damn identity crisis about it.

Now? Every other kid on TikTok is suddenly “non-binary.”

We went from “I’m a person” to “I’m an ethereal genderless spirit creature” in record time.

Why?

Because most of these people aren’t actually non-binary.

They’re just bored.

“Non-Binary” Is A Trend, Not A Reality

Let’s look at the numbers, because math doesn’t give a fuck about feelings.

In 2014, less than 0.5% of people in the U.S. identified as non-binary or genderfluid.

By 2021, that number skyrocketed to 5%—a 900% increase in less than a decade.

Among Gen Z? Over 25% claim to be “somewhere on the gender spectrum.”

Let me ask you something:

Did human biology change overnight?

Did evolution pull a U-turn in the last decade?

Or—and hear me out—is it more likely that being non-binary just became trendy?

Because if we’re suddenly seeing millions of people “discover” a gender identity crisis that literally never existed before, we need to ask:

👉 Is this real? 👉 Or is this just people desperate for attention?

The Non-Binary “Awakening” Is Just Tumblr 2.0

Back in the 2010s, this exact same pattern happened with:

“Pansexuality” (which, let’s be real, is just bisexual with extra steps)

“Otherkin” (people who insisted they were animals in human bodies)

“Demisexuality” (congratulations, you need an emotional connection to have sex—you’re just a normal person)

What happened?

It died off. Because it wasn’t real.

But gender? That’s the new hot trend.

And why wouldn’t it be?

You get instant validation online.

You get a special identity without having to achieve anything.

You get to be oppressed without having to actually experience hardship.

Who needs a personality when you can just claim a new gender every week and demand applause for it?

99% Of “Non-Binary” People Still Magically Align With Their Birth Sex

Let’s talk about how convenient this trend is.

Non-binary “men”—still act and dress like men.

Non-binary “women”—still act and dress like women.

You ever notice that?

They’ll scream at you that they’re not male or female, but 99% of them still look and behave like their birth sex.

They don’t transition. They don’t take hormones. They don’t change their physical presentation.

They just throw on a they/them pronoun in their bio and expect the world to rearrange itself around their new, fragile identity.

Because the truth is?

👉 They don’t actually believe they’re non-binary. 👉 They just like the attention that comes with it.

And in a world where being a regular man or woman is “boring,” what better way to stand out than making up an identity out of thin air?

Science Still Says There Are Two Genders—Cry About It

I know this upsets Twitter users with septum piercings, but:

👉 Every scientific study, every biological textbook, and every credible geneticist confirms that there are two sexes: male and female.

👉 99.98% of humans are born with either XY or XX chromosomes. (The other 0.02% are actual intersex individuals—a biological disorder, not a third gender.)

👉 No amount of “gender feelings” will change that.

So when someone says, “I’m neither male nor female, I’m non-binary,” what they really mean is:

🚨 “I am experiencing an existential crisis but instead of therapy, I decided to change my pronouns.”

And instead of saying “Damn, maybe I need a hobby,” they demand that the entire planet cater to their new self-diagnosed identity.

“But Gender Isn’t Biological, It’s A Social Construct!”

Wrong.

Languages across every culture—from Chinese to Arabic to Latin—have gender built into them.

Every civilization since the dawn of time has recognized two genders.

Animals, insects, and even goddamn plants operate on a male/female reproductive system.

But suddenly, in 2020, we discovered that all of history was wrong and Twitter activists are the new experts.

Sure.

The Harsh Truth: You’re Not Non-Binary—You’re Just Bored, Lonely, Or Looking For Clout

The explosion of non-binary identity isn’t a biological shift or a cultural enlightenment.

It’s a boredom epidemic.

People used to find meaning through:

✔ Building a career ✔ Raising a family ✔ Creating art ✔ Developing a real personality

Now?

People log onto TikTok, see a blue-haired activist getting 500,000 likes for saying “I just discovered I’m genderfluid,” and suddenly…

💡 “I’m non-binary too!”

Not because it’s real. Not because they ever struggled with gender before. But because it’s trendy, it gets attention, and it gives them something to put in their bio.

And the second this trend dies?

They’ll quietly drop it and pretend it never happened—just like they did with their Tumblr self-diagnosed mental illnesses.

Final Thought: Reality Always Wins

You can scream your gender feelings into the void. You can write 37 pronouns in your bio. You can throw a tantrum when someone says “sir” or “ma’am” in public.

But at the end of the day?

👉 Reality doesn’t care.

There are men and women. That’s it. That’s all there ever was. That’s all there ever will be.

And deep down? You know it.

Now go touch some grass.