Enchanted Faerie Dust

ROMAN SOLDIER: halt, strange person! where are you from?

you tore a thread from my dress and wrapped it round my finger

Hey you! Yes you! Are you an evil middle aged warlock in the midst of a kingdom crisis? Are your power hungry levels off the charts and there’s no way to keep it sated? Is regular old dark magic just not doing it for you? Do you ever wonder, am I just a teensy bit bisexual? If you answered yes to all these questions, fear not! We have got the solution for you! With the help of The Sexy Magic Mirror Elf™ the entire world will lay at your feet! Great! You may say, but how does it work? By communicating through the inter dimensional mirror plane, and ritual possession, the Sexy Magic Mirror Elf™ will tap into the darkest of ancient dark primal magic that no sane mage will touch so you can wield it! That’s right! Raw, untamed, primal energy! Coursing through your entire body! Destroying whatever soul you have left inside. The possibilities are endless! With this power you can become god, rule the world, turn your armies into berserker hellspawns, destroy your enemies, heck, even make your kids smarter! That’s right! You can use that power to make your dumb kids smarter! The Sexy Magic Mirror Elf™ not only bestows great power upon you, but also seductively manipulates you gives great advice! Who doesn’t want an ethereal elf stud, godlike being to whisper sweet, sweet nothings in your ear, I mean direct you on how to use that power unwisely, what move to make next, or listen to you rant about your dumb son without complaint. Intrigued? Call 1800SEXYMAGICMIRRORELF to get your Sexy Magic Mirror Elf™ now!

oh my gdO CAN YOU DRAW GODZILLA MOMMA CARRYING LIKE A HUNDRED LIZARD BABIES ON HER BACK FOR TAKE YOUR CHILD (lizard) TO WORK DAY