When Heaven and Earth are hand in hand

I am using him as my model for a process guide since people kept asking me 'how'. I made a hair tutorial many years ago and I don't really plan to do it again, because after this part I draw every single strand of hair individually and who the fuck wants to sit through me explaining what colours to put where, how, and why?

but yes v: always three base tones

like i literally could stop here and just maybe add a darker shadow for depth and a peak highlight

If it fits, I sits

Wouldn't that depend on the sort of 'letting go' that was done? Since any permanence wasn't a real concern, after all (and even again, provided he had his way)! Because yes, those little situations were the more likely result of it all. As for work? Well. He minded Konzen's work a bit more than half the time. Not when he'd been trying to drag the blond's attention onto himself originally; he had been very persistent not to allow his attempts to go so ignored. Even if he hadn't intended for all of this.

That was also a description he would like.

A soft, pleasant noise settled in his throat as he turned more into the kiss and new pressure, yes, that had been plenty clear. Konzen... Habit battled desire here – cycling to start or take it further; Konzen dealt with broken, scattered kisses often enough, regardless how sincere they were or the amount of emotion he always put into them. The kisses weren't one of the things he complained too much about really, unless they could get caught together in such a manner, so it wasn't as though he may have thought they were viewed negatively...

He remembered once being struck in the middle so hard he'd spat up blood. That's what this felt like, all that pain from her words. "Almost..." Hakkai repeated, breathlessly. So she'd failed. But she...could it be that he'd just not noticed? That her vital signs had just been so faint that after he'd been...that. That he hadn't noticed?

What good would it have done him even then? He hadn't been able to get to her, but all the same. He should have tried. Tried harder, laid dying with her if nothing else.

Coward.

It'd be a lie to say that to get through those stormy nights he'd sometimes built up the selfish fantasy that somehow she could be returned to him, that they could just go on after some time like none of it had ever happened.

Then he would remember everything he'd done between then and there and why should he deserve it? Deserve her? Why should be deserve the love of someone after all those lives he'd taken? A new name, a new life, travelling with the Sanzo, it wasn't enough. Nothing would wash away the blood of those sins.

He believed once that he had began to see it all so differently, that he'd started to let go. Live for himself. Wait for him a little longer. So why now? Why when he needed to take another step forward was he falling so rapidly backward instead? He needed to go to her – she was so close, it would be so easy. Needed to take her within his arms, tell her everything would get better to wash away the pain he could clearly see. But he'd failed her already. He wasn't worthy of even speaking to her.

Kanan suddenly being on her feet startled him out of his stupor and he'd almost jarred forward, and he'd reached limply for her back as she darted for the bathroom but he couldn't make his feet move from the spot they were cemented and could only watch, wide-eyed and with his mouth open, as his sister vanished from sight. It took a moment for him to slowly ease out of that stiffened pose.

Valid enough, but he wasn't literally a monkey! And he wouldn't have been comparing Konzen to a bird by saying as much, only that boredom could be really harmful!

Konzen clawing increasingly higher almost drew him up onto the ledge with him, a half-motion displaying that urge quite well. He resisted by forcing his focus to remain surely on not snagging silk as he worked clasps with the sides of his fingers, lower and lower as they came open. These were easier to manipulate than the collar since fabric had give to it and there was space to press in.

It may not have been the purpose, he knew that, but it once was that comparison that had brought him a small amusement.

This time when the corners of his lips tugged he didn't fight it. Oh yes, it would take more, yet it was always an enjoyable battle. Although perhaps it were a good thing he was looking for something more...involuntary?

As for suspicions, Goku wondered if that hadn’t been just to get him out of the room. With the mixture of things he felt from the two not his blond, however, he was more than willing to take the opportunity in either case, regardless of intent. He’d be pretty useless here; he handled these sort of things incredibly poorly when it involved himself simply out of just not knowing how. Secondly…it was likely better left to those two. ...Right?

He sank where he stood, golden eyes still fixed on Genjyo, fighting with the other part of himself that, well, really didn’t want to leave Hakkai. A short battle. Even during the times he would complain or fight, orders from the Sanzo often won over everything else. Goku, with his head down, hurried past Hakkai and back out the door to go bother the ladies downstairs to fill the Sanzo’s request.

Hakkai barely reacted to the smaller man making his way quickly around him, his eyes only having moved far enough to show that he had noticed him, however delayed it may have been. ‘If only’, he’d thought once. But it was impossible, wasn’t it? And this – some sort of trickery? His attention turned from Kanan to Genjyo as if he'd know better than him, reeling when she finally spoke; there was no mistake. The lack of colour in his skin was possibly the greater indicator of that understanding than the empty expression that lingered on his face.

In any other situation he may have looked at the Sanzo as if he'd had six heads; he had no idea what he said? If by what he'd been told moments ago had been like the last time, his mentality divided, then...it could make sense. They'd tried to block not only his sense of self but his knowledge, all of the accomplishments and power that had come with it, and tried to shape him to fit the level understanding he'd been allowed to maintain. There were bits and pieces he had began retaining during his time sealed, mostly information in place of voice or image, so the more he thought about it... Not to mention, that light was the same as the last time. He'd tell himself that again and again. It had to be the same. That had to be why he hadn't understood him.

With those thoughts also came the turning over of the name and title a few times in his head, eventually the sound forcing itself to be the sole focus and Goku mouthed it once. "Sanzo, then." The feel of it was familiar and solid, and it sounded correct while his voice carried it.

Perhaps there was hope in this, poor a tactic it may be. He scooted in a little bit closer in whatever distance was left after having been pulled to him and lifted a hand of his own to rest so lightly over the paler, more elegant one at his neck. "Would you tell me the names of the others as well?" 

Tell him that. Go on. Tell the monkey. Or not; with all the hope he had placed on the idea of having a new friend he would have been far more excited than probably needed. 'Married in another life' was...close enough, really. Kind of.

"Ah, don’t be like that, I said!" Goku chirped, butting back in as Genjyo pressed; he hadn’t exactly been aware as to why he may be doing it. "If she doesn’t wanna’ give it she doesn’t have to. These are yours, aren’t they? Here." He tossed a small paper box to the blond, aim mainly for the table in case he wouldn’t bother to catch even when he usually did. For all the chiding it’d been meant as there still remained a cheerful lilt to his voice, perhaps amused as much as Kanan had been at the Sanzo’s grumpiness.

But, in a way, he’d been neglectful to their guest because of the distraction. He turned on her again to smile brightly, welcome her to set her things down or get comfortable, when instead he found himself a new distraction. Maybe this is why he keeps screwing things up. “Yanno', you’ve got such pretty eyes.” The already broad grin grew; maybe the lighting in here or placement of? He’d not noticed so much earlier. “They kinda remind me of Hakkai’s…”

A curious look crossed over his face and he went silent, right eye pulling into a squint. That wasn’t the first thing, and it definitely hadn’t been the second or third. He tilted his head in that wonder, but it was meant to be short-lived.

On with familiar things – those footsteps so close to the room.

Goku perked in an almost animalistic manner and quickly tore his attention from Kanan to the doorway, brows high. Did he know he was being spoken about? He was going to shout something about timing, just to be that person, when Hakkai opened his mouth before him, a soft tease, "Goku, if you wanted to go back you could have let me know."

"Wasn't it you who was suddenly gone?!" the smaller brunet argued, bristled, and loud enough to be heard through the door and over the 'click' as Hakkai turned the handle to let himself in.

"Was it?" He hadn't opened the door all the way in case there may be someone near; Goku had sounded pretty close, and slipped around it upon seeing that wasn't the case.

Did anyone want a preview of what I'm doing instead of getting dressed for work? Totally not flirty shit instead of the kisses I said I had wanted to draw, yesterday.

Or develop odd habits. Birds plucked themselves, didn't they?

Konzen's breath holding was met with an immediately retaliation – he knew he wouldn't keep holding his breath, that wasn't the issue, it was that the purpose was likely to keep from making noise, and he abandoned his spot briefly to nip almost sharply higher up. The hand at his neck slipped to start fiddling with tiny clasps in careful touches and he returned to the previous task meanwhile, perhaps a bit closer to his collar, hard and attentive, intent to pull blood to surface without breaking skin. Provided that it didn't interfere he was content to let Konzen move or hold him however he wished and shifted easily when pulled.

There came little reaction to the biting, there rarely ever was unless it was sudden and sharp, seeming to do nothing beyond allow it to happen. The God's teeth weren't really designed to function in the manner his did and while the first time he'd bitten down on him anywhere had him inwardly amused there was no way to pretend he didn't enjoy it, even in such mild displays. Mainly what it'd meant for him to be bit in such a way.

He may as well give in early on his decision to not provide Konzen with other forms of attention just yet.

It wasn't only the recycling of a soul. He didn't share it with someone else. This wasn't coincidence.

At most he would agree to refer to Konzen and Genjyo separately (and not just the name; he'd call him by his name regardless if he knew of his past or not because it was his current). For Goku it would be accepting that he didn't know who he was, that he didn't know about them, which was fine. He didn't need to remember; he knew what the scarring meant even if the blond didn't this current life.

But he had patience and time now that he knew he hadn't lost him forever. That the magic had indeed worked.

He hadn't realised continuing, though it'd come with prompt, would also hurt the other man. He just...he needed to explain; the blood thirst had come on so suddenly and in the state he'd been in. How everything settled passed the Gates only to vanish completely, differently.

When he did realise it was after he'd started to calm down and darker eyes couldn't hold his, flinching in a manner felt across the whole of his body. With a hand his head also lowered, curling within his palm instead the cloth which covered his own chest. "That isn't what I..."

Legitimate mental issues weren't a part of this conversation; he didn't have any!

Even if he tilted his head at the other's hand to watch as he aimed past him, a half-grin on his face and a brow lifted in that amusement. He'd been too focused on the way he gripped it, so much stronger than what he'd once been even as a God, to realise that he wouldn't have time to tell him that he didn't have to do anything about the leftovers. He'd take care of it.

Although it may not have been the familiar theatrical display Goku tended to put on, he did still jump this time when the gun was fired so close to him even with being so sure he wouldn't end up the target where there was room for mistake on either side. It was a simple dip at one knee, enough to pivot on his other foot to turn halfway from the blond and fix him with an agitated stare while he held a hand over the ear the gun had been nearest.

Goku wouldn't accept the bare minimum unless the once-God ever ceased desiring him, even if neither (when the blond could acknowledge it, whether inwardly or once everything caught back up to him) saw it as a possibility. He'd never fall out of love with him but their bond would break and he would let him be; it would hurt too much otherwise. There had been a time when he'd thought it wouldn't carry through, that their attempt at visible evidence and creating more of a link would only last a lifetime...and maybe he'd been afraid that they'd just gotten lucky with it the last life.

He'd really rather just keep him this time if he had a say in it since it was more likely he'd continue returning as human. At least longer if nothing else; their time together had been far too brief before this. There would always be that part of him which doubted he could endure a human's lifespan, to watch him grow and slowly need to let go while the other part hoped it'd be easier. He hadn't the time to consider it with the Sanzo.

Was it only belief when it was revealed as truth? Nudge Ty and ask him if in the scenario he'd pop up as a cicada next life how he felt about riding around on his shoulder.

This was pretty well taking everything Buddhist belief was supposed to be and just running with the concept.

And that was okay.

i fukcing swear i thought i had posted these, or moved them to my art blog

i guess not 

whatever take theM ALL I OWE HAPPY EVERYONE HAPPY SHIT ANYWAYS AFTER PULLING THAT but i'm also not sorry

Should he pretend to be startled? For some reason he thought he should have at least jumped back for the Sanzo, even if it felt attached to a different sort of situation. Instead, since he hadn't moved other than to turn down his eyes in bit of a cross to look upon the weapon briefly. His own rested on the ground near the tree he'd previously decided to take a break at in all its weight, about the size of a typical scroll. He didn't care.

It was a curious look he fixed the blond with, lifted brow probably getting the question of 'haven't we gone over this already' across more clearly than asking directly. It was awfully loud between the fight and gunshots though; there was no point in asking why, or if he'd startled Genjyo sliding up beside him like that.

Full images may later be posted on my art blog after I tidy them up more and add a few details, especially around Sanzo's waist. I tried to keep the poses similar sldfg

Semi-related headcanon: After his mind has settled he doesn't sleep with the circlet for comfort.

Canon: Genjyo's waistline is 22"

Headcanon: Goku likes to lay in that gap when resting (additionally, if Konzen had the same curves, this originated there).