empathy pig

Laying there, stirring, in the deep trenches of an ocean of misery, it felt almost like an insult. How can you say that? How can you sit there and tell me that when everything I can see around me is the same pitch black as always? There's no light down here. And there never will be.

And I can't overstate how wrong I was. In the short 2 years since, I've found people i care about, joined communities I enjoy being a part of, and most importantly, I've just been... happier. In general.

I'm most certainly not anywhere near the surface of the water yet. The world looks like shit, and I'm still struggling in various parts of my life. But any number above 0 is still infinitely higher than before.

You might read this post and have the exact same kind of thoughts I did, a deep pessimism delivered with a sharp tongue. And who am I to gospel the light of hope to those who cannot see it?

I'm not saying that you need to have hope for your own future. I'm saying that you need to not give in. Don't let hopelessness use it's slimy tendrils to immobilize you, because you need to keep going. Keep your blood flowing, your heart beating, your lungs working, to keep surviving. I just want you to try and make it to tomorrow.

And every step you take, every hold you find on your way out of the nadir, I'll be there, by your side, trying my best to cheer you on. And one day, when the grass on the shore looks as green as ever, I'll be there to congratulate you for all that hard work you've done.

But giving in to their will is the last thing you should do. This doesn't mean you need to keep fighting at all times, doing that is unsustainable. As long as you live and breathe and walk and talk and love and exist, you are rebelling.

A soldier cannot win a war on their own. And a soldier can't win without rest as well. The longer you slog through the trenches the worse you'll be shellshocked. And while you travel back into the bunk beds, there will be people out there to fight the good fight. We support each other and take care of each other and hold each others backs as the bullets fly past, and as a community we never relent until the end.