anarchist.

You would be he best stockroom worker there’s ever been, mate. But shut the fuck up, you’re going to end up at the top of the fashion and acting industry, always with your pink hair. You’ll be as famous as Wintour, I just know it. I think it matters very much and you can’t just look after other people and not yourself. Like, I’m sure the guy is a good friend of yours, but I also think if he really cared about either of you, he would let it happen. You didn’t get with her when they were together, did you? Then, you didn’t get in the middle of them.

Or the worst. I’d definitely just pile up all the stock and have absurdly long naps on shift, let’s be real. Luckily for all the Urban Outfitters stores of the world, being as big as Wintour in the fashion scene is the goal, so I won’t be handing my resume in to any of them. As always, you seem to know what you’re talking about, bud. He’s kinda given the green light now so she can have another shot at being happy, so I’ve taken it. We’re about to grab some sushi tonight, see how things go, and you know I’ll be giving you the full run-down when I’m back later...or tomorrow.

I did, actually. Even before I had my child and I have no regrets about it. The second one actually wasn’t too bad. I’d recommend it if you’re ever bored and want to watch it. Me? Nice? Never.

I mean, I would. But since it’s getting dangerously close to December the one and only thing I’m allowed to watch is Die Hard from here on out. It’s like, a personal rule. That and the Lord Of The Rings, because that’s just a year-round-exception. I know you got that whole bad bitch persona you put out to the world, but you can be nice, too. I’ll keep your secret. 

charles: i feel the same way. i'm not the kind of guy that gets a thrill off hurting people. hahahaha! it is ironic. doesn't mean we're bad people, though.

charles: perfect! i'm glad we're on the same page. 😂

charles: we're still buddies, evan. i promise

evan: if we were both bad guys, we wouldn't be in this mess, let's not let this be a learning curve 😂

Eli: The girl from Riverdale? Damn, dude. Remember when we went undercover with GQ and you called me shady for saying that I'd never watched Riverdale? Maybe we need to binge it now.

Eli: You can just fill me in in person. Hmm, what sort of plan? Is my boy going on a date?

Eli: There is quite literally nothing going on in my love life. Unless you know something that I don't.

Ev: The irony isn't lost on me, I literally had that realization maybe the second time I was lying in bed with her? You said you were tryna start 'teen drama show beef' and I went the opposite way and fraternized with the 'enemy'.

Ev: Yeah, man. Trying to do the whole wining and dining thing, with zero experience. Both my other girlfriends were literally introduced to me at parties.

For sure. Your life’s work? What an honor. Like…on a date?! I’ll be there. What time? Now I’ve got to go shopping for a new outfit this weekend!

You’re kinda adorable. Yeah, like on a date. I’m taking a shot in the dark here and thinking that’s the next step after sleeping with someone, almost pulling back, then getting the green light. Seems only logical, don’t you think? Hope you bought something that’ll completely distract me from my food. I’ll see you tonight. 

Eli: You know I'm always down for a road trip.

Eli: Who was it?

Eli: Flying too close to the sun? Why? What went down?

Ev: [ IMAGE ATTACHED ] https://tinyurl.com/4wwjs4m5

Ev: It's a long-ass story, bro. But I have a plan to mend it, so hopefully soon I'll be saying "lol nvm".

Mhm. My dream. We can only hope. I would die if she asked me to star in a short film. You could end my career right then and there. I don’t know what caused it, but I’m glad he did it. Where do we go from here?

Between us both, we have to have some mutual friends with her, right? I’ll get my thinking cap on and make it my lifes work to get you on a Tay Tay video. I guess...you could always try meeting me at Miku in Vancouver on Monday to find out?

It’s ironic you say that as we just watched The Incredibles the other night and I like to think she loved it. She truly is Jack Jack in real life and she is pretty chaotic on a daily basis. I love puns so I am appreciating this moment for the rest of my life. That was a pretty good one, if I do say so myself.

I’m kinda disgusted in myself that I got excited knowing a second one was coming out...and then never went to see it. Have you seen both? I need to know what I’m missing out on, here. You’re literally just being nice, I see through you, Turner. 

charles: dude. what i was trying to tell you earlier is that i'll always love cami. she's been my muse since... forever.

charles: i want her to be happy with a good man. you're the good man, evan. please make her happy. if you hurt her, i'll kill you :)

evan: well, you know i would never intentionally hurt anyone. it's just ironic that in trying to not hurt anyone, i've done the exact opposite and hurt her already. and you, too. it's like, the worlds stickiest situation.

Eli: Of course I want to join. Then you can fill me in on everything that's been going on with you.

Eli: Mhm. I'd actually /love/ to hear them. Just don't make me jealous.

Ev: Lit, I'm planning on heading there today once I check out - we can get a rental and drive down there? Road trip it.

Thanks, Ev. We looked like a forbidden romance… Who would ever imagine a Hufflepuff with a Slytherin? Speaking of… did you talk to Charles? It seems he’s had a change of heart.

A true WattPad fantasy, there’ll be themed Taylor Swift songs about us soon. She does that sorta stuff, right? Give it a year before we get a mini-movie about two star-crossed lovers and she asks us to star. I’m calling it now. I...did somewhat, yeah. I told him the same thing I told you, but I don’t think that’s what caused him to wave the white flag - I think that was because of you. 

if this barista turns out to be the love of my life, you’re my maid of honor, mock, you know that right? not just a pretty face indeed, you’re the smartest person i know and i know a lot of people, trust me. i have a lot to tell actually! don’t tell anyone but that zión person is going around the studio and telling others that evan mock stinks. you know, the usual, just been out and about. ready to take a vacation somewhere remote at this point. what have you been up to, superstar?

I wouldn’t accept anything less. You know your bachelorette party about to be popping with me in charge of it. Might bring Savannah and Emily on board just for those perfecting touches or you might end up having a warehouse rave with us all in co-ordinating reflective outfits, but...sounds pretty sick to me, right? I’ll even throw in personalised ‘team Z’ sneakers for pampering my ego like that. No way?! And to think I always thought you appreciated my musk - that’s the sign of a hard working man, right there. Just been here, there and everywhere - and that’s not a brag after you just said you needed a vacation - because it’s definitely not intentionally been one - but when work takes you to Milan, Paris and London it’s not exactly a hardship. Remote sounds nice, though. Anywhere in particular in mind?

If Willa did, I might need to run in the other direction. She’s chaotic without the powers, Lord only knows how she’d be with actual powers. Aren’t kids around to help out around the house and do the work for you? Or did my parents lie to me my whole life just to get me to do their jobs? When she’s not breaking my stuff and getting into everything, she’s a good little helper. Would recommend to anyone.

I’m gonna call her Jack Jack from now on, because she sounds like that baby from The Incredibles - even without the powers. We should’ve known the apple wouldn’t fall far from it’s chaotic tree mom. I think that’s a talk you need to have with Mr and Mrs Turner - as long as they don’t turner way from you when you go to bring it up. Okay, I’m sorry, that was really bad. 

That’s very true! I know, it’s why I had to do it. It was something different and I definitely stood out. Honestly, you’re not wrong. Deadpool is amazing, but very over cosplayed. Alright, well, I’ll give you mine now and maybe her’s after I ask. How’s that sound?

If I had one wish, it’d be that the Deadpool and the Harley Quinn cosplayers would just run off into the sunset together, never to return. Sounds like I’m winning - definitely not about to complain. Hand ‘em over, Robinson.