passing through time

still. after all of it. mostly, i want to be kind

Having mental health struggles is already exhausting, but having too much empathy on top of that just breaks you in quiet ways. You carry pain that isn’t even yours, overthink every word, and feel responsible for fixing things you didn’t even break. It’s like bleeding from your own wounds while trying to bandage everyone else’s. I don’t know if anyone else feels like this, but if you do… I see you.

I have nobody I can talk to. Nobody who actually gets it. Nobody who is self aware. Nobody who won’t judge me or betray what I say. It’s one of the most crushing parts of this. It’s not just being alone. It’s trying to talk and it landing flat. Feeling worse after. Starting to think there’s no point in reaching out at all.

“You want me to absolve you of your guilt. You want me to say it was all fine and I’m not hurt anymore. But I can’t, and I won’t. You hurt me, and you don’t want to change. You just want to make yourself feel better about it.”