She glanced down at the blood seeping through the cloth and tried to stay calm. This couldn’t be real. It couldn’t be happening. Charlie had just gotten her back, and they had finally worked out a way to love each other again. Everything was the way it was supposed to be, and this was not the way it was supposed to be.

“Yeah, you are.” She agreed, nodding quickly as she looked into Ember’s beautiful brown eyes. “You’re totally okay.” When Ember tried to sit up, Charlie grabbed her shoulders, holding her back down on her lap. “Hey, hey. Don’t move. Stay right here and don’t leave me.” The phase was meant to keep Ember down on her lap, but the wording stuck Charlie as so much more. Leave. Go away from me. Die. Fear spiked in her chest, and she looked down at her girlfriend’s pale face. “Oh god, Em. Please don’t leave me.”

A man with a phone pressed to his ear rushed into the shop, yelling that help was on its way. Her eyebrows shot up, and she smiled through messy tears. “They are coming Em, just keep looking at me, baby.” He leaned down, pressing her lips against Ember’s for a long second. When Ember called her Charlotte and told her she loved her, Charlie bit her lip, shaking her head back and forth. She couldn’t hear this, she could let Ember say goodbye, but at the same time, if something happened and Ember didn’t make, Charlie needed her to know that she felt the same way.

“No. Stop. You do not get to say goodbye.” She leaned down and kissed her again. “I am so in love with you, and I will be tomorrow and next week and in twenty years. You are going to be okay.” The shop filled with red flashing lights and the sounds of shouting and Charlie sighed in relief. “They are here.  You’re going to be okay, baby. It’s all going to be okay.” Charlie sobbed as she looked back down at Ember and met with closed eyes and a pale face.

“Please hurry!” She shouted, holding onto Ember until the paramedics finally moved her out of the way. She noticed the syringe in one of their hands and froze, terrified of what pain meds might mean to Ember’s recovery. “She’s eight months sober! I don’t… I don’t know what she would want.” The realization that she wasn’t able to communicate Ember’s needs hit her hard and Charlie stumbled back into the counter. “I don’t know what she wants.”

Everything around her was a blur. Ember knew pain, but nothing like this. She knew what helplessness felt like, and she hated it, yet this was so much worse. Being shot wasn’t something she ever thought would be a thing. It seemed like something that she would see on the news or in movies, but it was one of those things where the reality of it ever happening was so slim that she never worried. And now it had.

She was fading fast, going in and out as they waited for the ambulance. There wasn’t much she could do or say. It seemed like any possible words she could say had just disappeared, and her body hurt too much to move. All she could do was try to breathe, and even that felt like a chore. 

When the ambulance arrived, she was out of it. She was barely registering the commotion until she heard the word sober come from her girlfriend. She swallowed hard, despite the dryness she felt in her mouth. “It’s.. it’s okay,” she managed to get out. Was it okay? She didn’t know. It probably wasn’t a good idea. She didn’t know if having her pain managed like that was going to spark a real slip in her sobriety or if she’d be able to avoid going down that dark path. Time would tell.

She faded back out after that. The paramedics tended to her before loading her up on the stretcher and loading her into the back of the ambulance. 

The thing about it was, Charlie had never felt this amount of love before. It was everything Charlie had ever wanted from Ember and each day seemed a little better than the previous one. The last eight months had been filled with laughter and fun and earth-shattering sex that reached into her heart healed her in every possible way. Charlie was in love and it was deep and real and she wasn’t about to let Ember slip away ever again.

When Ember asked her to hang out at the bakery for the day, Charlie did not hesitate to say yes. She loved spending time with Ember and watching her work her magic. Charlie hid out in the kitchen for most of the morning, snatching bites of cookies whenever she had the chance. But it was the taste of cookie crumbs on Ember’s lips that really drove her wild and she made sure to as many kisses as she did samples. The rest of the day she had set up at one of the tables in the shop to get some work done. It was easy to work with the hustle and bustle people coming in and out of the bakery. Ember was debuting her new cookie and Charlie got a kick out of hearing people order the Charlie’s Chocolate Chip Swirl over and over again.

When it was finally time to close up, Charlie packed her stuff and walked to the back to stick it in Ember’s office. They had already planned on stopping to grab a pizza on the way back to Ember’s place and Charlie was pretty positive that her girlfriend was going to be rewarded with a night full of sex for the success of Charlie’s Chocolate Chip Swirl cookies. Charlie was practically radiating with love and everything around them seemed almost too good to be true.

Charlie should have known nothing is ever meant to stay perfect for long.

The sound of glass breaking in the front of the shop startled her and she turned toward the door, hitting her shin on the office chair. “Ow, shit.” She leaned down, rubbing at the sore spot for a moment before standing up and walking out to cross through the kitchen. “Em? You okay? Please tell me you didn’t break another cake stand…”

She turned into the front of the shop and froze, just in time to see a man swing his arm around and point a gun at her. Seconds turned into hours. It was almost as time had completely stopped. She stood, frozen in place as she watched the end of the gun light up twice just as her girlfriend stepped in front of her. The sound of the bullets hitting their target seemed to switched time back on and she stepped forward to grab Ember as she stagged backward. “No. No, no, no, no, no…” All of the color drained from her face as she started to realize exactly what had happened. She helped Ember as she started to sink down to the ground, cradling her body in her arms as she shook her head back and forth over and over again.

“Em, baby…please, what do I do?” She asked, more to herself than to the girl whose blood was soaking into her jeans. Her phone was in her laptop bag and when she patted Ember’s pockets she couldn’t find hers either. She reached up and grabbed a nearby cloth, pressing it into the woman’s abdomen tightly, terrified to leave her to go grab a phone. “It’s going to be okay Ember. I am right here.” Her voice shook as her sobs started to come in small waves. “Baby, please just keep your eyes open.” She could hear the sounds of footsteps on the sidewalk and she tore her gaze away from Ember to yell for help. “PLEASE! HELP US, CALL 911!” She held tight to her girlfriend, looking down into her eyes as she continued to scream for help and pray that someone was listening.

As the seconds passed, everything got progressively more real, yet at the same time, Charlie’s voice just made her adrenaline spike. She was certain that was the only reason she hadn’t passed out yet. Her heart was pounding, she could hear it in her ears as she stayed there cradled in her girlfriend’s arms. She had always thought people were crazy when they’d say they would take a bullet for someone they love, but she did just that.

“I.. I’m o-okay,” she stuttered out, though her voice was more of an airy whisper than anything else. Ember was always the type to try and hold herself together, even now as the pain started to become more and more unbearable. There were bullets floating around inside of her, she was bleeding, and yet she was trying to keep as calm as she could manage.

“I.. W-where’s.. I’ll call,” she said, trying to sit up more in Charlie’s arms before letting out a cry of pain. She didn’t want Charlie to let go. So when the other girl called out for help, she swallowed hard. She didn’t know if anyone would want to come in to a shop with a busted window and a bleeding woman on the ground. But as she started fading in and out, someone came darting in with their phone already up to their ear. 

“Charlotte,” she began, trying to keep her eyes open. “I l-love you..”

She had dubbed today as bring your girlfriend to work day, although it wasn’t unusual to have Charlie hanging around there with her when she had a light day of work and could make it down there. She loved when Charlie was there, it always made her day go by much faster. Since they had gotten back together, the bakery had been flourishing more than it ever had before. There was no such thing as a slow day there.

The shop was closed for the night, and Ember had sent Charlie into the back to make sure everything was tidied up. She began counting what was in the register, and felt content. Next thing she knew, one of her front windows was shattered and someone was in her store, crunching the broken glass under their shoes. She could see the way the man was looking at her. She knew that face. He moved closer to her and she wasn’t sure what to do. She didn’t want to give him the money, but she didn’t know what he was going to do. He had a hand in his pocket, and that was concerning.

She could hear footsteps from the back room that she knew were Charlie’s and her breath caught in her throat. If she came out and startled him, it could be bad. But then her girlfriend was there and he pulled out a gun. Everything from that point on became a blur. She could hear two shots ring out as she stepped in front of Charlie. The man took the money in the register and bolted out of there.

Ember didn’t feel anything initially. She looked down and the the blood all over her, seeping in from two holes in her abdomen. She was numb. Her hand instinctively went down to her new injuries, and pressed against them for a moment. When she pulled her hand away, she stared at the bright red liquid that coated it. She looked around her bakery, taking in the shattered window, the empty cash register, and the dark puddle beginning to form underneath her. She didn’t know what to think. It was all so surreal, she couldn’t even begin to fathom why it had to come to this. “Ch-Charlie..,” she whispered, starting to become very aware of her pain now. “I- I think I need a few band-aids.”

She cried out loudly at the feeling of teeth at her neck and fingers filling her. Her breath came in fast gasps as she whimpered, lost in the feeling of Ember filling her. She groped at her own breasts, pulling on her nipples as she focused on the way Ember expertly fucked her. “Don’t stop, please baby. Please don’t stop.” She begged as she squirmed against the other girl.

Ember let out a small moan when she saw the way Charlie was pulling on her own nipples. She grew wetter at the sight, which she didn’t know was possible. “I won’t,” she replied, picking up the pace with her fingers. She fucked her girlfriend harder, faster, and deeper, making sure to use her thumb to continue rubbing at her clit like she had done before.

She gasped and moaned loudly when Ember started rubbing her clit, her own hand falling away from Ember to grab at the couch. She knew she was already soaked and an urgent, needy feeling was spreading through her quickly. Panting, she bucked her hips up to press against Ember’s hand, desperate to get closer, to get more. “Please fuck me Em.” She whined again, needing her girlfriend’s fingers inside her almost as much as she needed air.

Ember nodded. She kissed Ember’s jaw, and down along her neck. She bit down on the skin at the same time that she entered her girlfriend with three fingers, sliding them in and out of her slowly, but deeply, curling them in an upward motion on every thrust into her. “You’re so wet for me, baby,” she whispered against her skin.

She gasped loudly, and it didn’t take long for her to dip her fingers in to tease Ember’s clit. She felt overwhelmed with sensations, and she focused on the press of Ember’s lips down her neck and the glorious wet heat that started to coat her fingers. She licked her lips and moaned when Ember’s palm brushed over her nipple, and she used her free hand to tease the other one. “Em, baby…” she whined, flicking her finger across her girlfriend clit so slowly, “baby, please.”

Ember moaned the minute Charlie began to tease her clit. She needed the other girl more than she had initially thought, but hearing the way Charlie gasped and whined, it only made Ember hungry for her, wanting to please her. She moved her own hand down between Charlie’s legs, touching her girlfriend’s clit. She rubbed tight little circles against it and smirked. “Please what?”

They had slept together quite a few times since getting back together but each time still felt like the first to Charlie. Each time seemed like a chance to relearn her girlfriend’s body and find new ways to make her moan. Charlie toed at her socks and pushed her jeans down her legs a little as she stumbled to the couch. It took a moment, but she was finally able to get her pants off, and her panties followed behind them within seconds.  Reaching behind Ember’s body, she unhooked the woman’s bra and pushed it off her shoulders before undoing her own. Once there were no obstacles between them, Charlie pulled Ember to her and kissed her, sighing at the feeling of skin on skin. “You’ve got me, baby; I’m not letting you go.” Charlie moaned, pulling Ember down with her as she fell back onto the couch.

Ember took a minutes to looked over her girlfriend. Charlie was so beautiful. Ember feel lucky that Charlie was hers, she was lucky that they had been able to make a comeback, even if it did Ember a long time to find her way back to the other girl. Once on top of Charlie, Ember continued to kiss her, before moving her lips down to her neck. She palmed at one of her breasts, taking in the feeling of her skin pressed against hers. Ember used her other hand to take Charlie’s guiding it between her legs so her girlfriend could feel how wet she already was.

Charlie watched as her girlfriend pulled away and stripped off her shirt. She snorted back a laugh at the other woman’s enthusiasm and reached back out to put her hands on her body. When Ember grabbed her hand and shot her that perfect smirk, Charlie’s mouth suddenly went dry and other places got quite wet. Her gaze swept over Ember’s top half and when the other girl mentioned riding her tongue, Charlie blushed deeply. Every ounce of love she had just been feeling turned to white-hot lust and she grabbed the back of Ember’s neck and pulled her into a searing kiss.

Slowly, she backed out of the kitchen, pulling Ember with her without disconnecting their mouths. She let her hands roam over Ember’s tight stomach and up to her breasts before finally pulling away for a much-needed breath. “I don’t think I can make it to the bedroom…” she glanced over to the couch and blinked hard, it was going to have to do. She pulled her shirt off and reached over to undo Ember’s pants, pushing them down her hips as she pulled the other woman towards the couch and into another kiss.

Ember was almost a little surprised by how quickly Charlie pulled her into the kiss. She figured her words would get Charlie going a little, but the minute she kissed her, the need she felt was more than she knew how to express. Ember stepped out of her pants once Charlie had pushed them down. “Couch is good,” she muttered. She tugged her panties off as well by the time they had made it to the couch. She didn’t want to waste any time. Ember kept her lips on Charlie’s, unbuttoning her pants as well. She let out a soft moan, standing there pressed against her girlfriend in nothing but a bra at this point. “God, I need you so bad,” she whispered against her lips.

The warmth Charlie was already feeling just continued to spread as she listened to her girlfriend talk. How was it that after everything they had been through, all of their ups and downs, things ended up perfectly for them? Charlie was beyond sure of the fact that she was going to spend the rest of her life with this woman. Hell, if they could make it through everything I had so far, nothing could get in their way now.

She leaned into Ember, grinning against her neck as she tried to contain the sheer amount of happiness she was feeling. “Charlie’s Chocolate Chip Swirls? I have my own cookie?!” Giggling, she leaned in, her tongue sliding across Ember’s bottom lip before opening her mouth to deepen the kiss. She slid her hand under the front of Ember’s shirt, loving the way her skin felt under her fingertips. “You are so amazing, I can’t believe how much I love you.” She whispered when she finally pulled away for a breath. “You do know that you’re going to get laid tonight, right?”

Ember was overjoyed by how happy Charlie was by all of this. “You have your own cookie. Your own gay, chocolate-y, wonderful cookie.” She moaned softly into the kiss, and again when Charlie’s fingers brushed over her skin like that. When the other woman pulled away, Ember stepped aside, tugging off her shirt and tossing it aside.

 She smirked a little at Charlie, taking her by the hand. “No, I’m not,” she said. “I’m going to get laid now because we have to be up bright and early tomorrow so doing it later tonight isn’t gonna work for me,” she said. “You can fuck me now.” She brushed some of her hair out of her face. “So tell me. Where would you rather have me riding your tongue? Pick a spot.”

Ember couldn’t have been more wrong. There were a million reasons why she loved the other woman and zero words she could say to explain it to Ember. She loved how easy it was between them, she loved the way Ember smiled before she said her name, she loved the soft feel of Ember’s thumb stroking the back of her hand whenever they held hands. She loved Ember’s brain, she loved Ember’s eyes, she loved the little dip of her abs. Looking up at her girlfriend, Charlie wanted to put all of those reasons into words, but the way Ember looked when she laughed softly made the breath catch in Charlie’s throat and all she could do was lean in and kiss her. Their kiss was hot and slow and Charlie knew that if Ember was the only girl she ever kissed again, she would be completely content. When she finally pulled back, Charlie reached around and squeezed Ember’s butt playfully. “That’s not true, I also love you for your cute ass.”

She watched Ember grab a cookie and eyed it carefully. “You can have one, the rest are all mine.” Charlie leaned back against the counter and pulled Ember into her arms, holding her close to her body. “Of course I will go to the bakery with you tomorrow.” She cocked her head to the side and looked at her girlfriend carefully wondering what this was really about. “Everything okay Em?” She asked, nervousness creeping into her voice. “No more secrets, right? You’d talk to me if something was wrong?”

Ember squealed softly. “Of course. How could I forget about how much you love my ass?” she asked, winking at Charlie with a small smirk. Ember held onto her cookie and nodded. “Fine, fine. All for you, babe,” she said to her. She stayed close to her girlfriend and smiled. “I’m really glad to hear that,” she said. Ember could notice the nerves growing into Charlie’s voice. She shook her head.

“Everything is fine,” she told her. “I’m just.. I.. I named the cookies after you. I wanted to make something new, and I wanted it to be special. And there’s nothing more special to me than you. Charlie’s Chocolate Chip Swirl cookies. I thought it’d be nice if the inspiration was there.” She sighed. “Not to mention, it would mean a whole day together

She wrapped her arms around Ember’s waist and giggled into her neck. Sometimes Charlie felt a little overwhelmed with the amount of love she felt for Ember. After everything they had been through, their relationship was better than ever and she cherished every moment she got to spend with her girl. She lifted her head and kissed Ember below the ear, her hand trailing down the woman’s arm to interlock their fingers. “Of course I want to find a place together. I want a home that is as much yours as it is mine and I want to come home to you every day. Especially if there are cookies!”

She turned to the counter and grabbed a cookie, turning it around to see the pretty rainbow sprinkles. Taking a good sized bit, Charlie moaned and chew slowly. The cookie was like gay chocolate heaven and she quickly finished it off in a few bites.

“Oh my god, Em. They are so good. Are these all mine?” She asked, pointing at the tray enthusiastically.

She licked her lips, keeping her own arms tight around her girlfriend. She loved Charlie with everything she had in her. It was scary but she wasn’t going to run, not again. She let out a soft gasp when she was kissed below her ear. Ember ran her thumb over Charlie’s hand gently. “I want that too,” she said quietly. “I want us to get back to that.” She chuckled. “You just love me for my cookies,” she teased, shaking her head.

Ember watched closely while Charlie picked up a cookie ad took a bite. She hoped that she’d like them. When she did, she felt relief wash over her entire body.

“Well, I’d like one or two, but yes,” she said, picking one up for herself. “I need you to come into the shop with me,” she told her. “These cookies make their debut tomorrow and I just.. You need to be there.”

Laughing softly against Ember’s mouth, Charlie pulled away from the kiss and rolled her eyes. “Oh yeah, that’s me. Mean ol’ Charlie." She rubbed at her keys in her hand and made a quick decision. It didn’t matter how new they were or how many years they had been together before. All that mattered now was that she loved Ember and she wanted to be around the other woman as much as possible. She pulled her own house key off her keychain and reached for Ember’s hand, pressing it into her girlfriend’s palm. "I just want you around, like as much as possible. So take this and feel free to use it whenever you want.” She leaned into Ember and stared at her for a moment, knowing that she was ready for whenever was next for them. “And maybe we can start looking for a place to call ours soon.”

She giggled as she was dragged into the kitchen, swooning a little at the sight of the cookies cooling on the counter. She pressed herself into Ember’s side and kissed her cheek. Ember’s baking was her favorite food group and she couldn’t get enough of the other woman’s sweet treats. “Oh my god, babe, they are so gay! I love them! Are they ready? Can I have one?”

“So, so mean.” Ember wondered when they were going to get to a point again where they could live together. She didn’t want to rush anything. She wanted it to happen naturally, the way it was meant to be, and she didn’t know when that would be. But the minute Charlie pressed the key into her palm, her face lit up. “You have no idea how much this means to me,” she whispered softly. “Really? Y-you.. You want to find a place together?”

Ember blushed a little when she kissed her on the cheek. “They are very, very gay,” she agreed with a laugh. “Of course. Try one and let me know what you think,” she said. She wanted the perfect moment to let Charlie know that she had named the cookies after her. She wanted something special, and she thought these cute little gay cookies were perfect. 

Charlie had spent the better part of the day stuck in design meetings with her newest client. The small restaurant was opening in the next couple of months and they needed to get their website up and start getting their name out there. She loved listening to her client’s ideas and being able to create something that people had only ever envisioned before. She had left with ideas and a list of must-haves and spent the rest of the afternoon working at one of her favorite coffee shops.

She grinned when she pulled up next to Ember’s car in the driveway, excitement at seeing her girlfriend surging through her.  The last four months had been amazing and every moment she spent with Ember reaffirmed her feelings for the other woman. No relationship was perfect and they had hit bumps here and there, but Charlie knew that there was no one she wanted more than her girl.

Slipping the key into the lock, Charlie pushed open the door and grinned at the sweet smell of cookies. There was something pretty amazing about coming home to the scent of freshly baked cookies and knowing your love was there waiting for you. When Ember walked into the living room, drying her hands on her apron, Charlie could have sworn her heart sighed at the sight.

“You are dumb.” She joked, walking forward to greet Ember with a kiss. “I love it that you are here, I think you should be here all the time.” She had been trying to work up the courage to bring up the subject of moving back in together, but every time her opportunity arose she chickened out, afraid that the other woman would say no.

Reaching out, Charlie squeezed Ember’s arm as she looked over her shoulder into the kitchen. “What is that amazing smell?”

Ember stared at Charlie, pretending to look offended. “I am not dumb,” she told her, shaking her head. “You’re so mean to me,” she added, chuckling. She kissed get girlfriend back softly. 

The brunette had been happier those last few months than she had been for the entirety of their time apart from each other. It really was so eye opening as to how much she valued having and needed Charlie in her life. Things finally felt good and normal again, and it was exciting.

“Really?” She liked that Charlie enjoyed her being there so much. “I should?” she asked curiously. She bit her lower lip for a moment. “What are you getting at?” 

Ember grinned, taking Charlie by the hand. “C’mon, I have something for you to try. They’re new, for the bakery,” she explained, leading her towards the tray of rainbow-y, chocolate-y chocolate chips cookies.

An hour an a half later, the kitchen was a disaster, but the smell of freshly baked cookies filled the air. Chocolate cookie batter had been swirled with plain chocolate chip cookie batter that had been coloured into a rainbow. They were chocolate and rainbow chocolate chip cookies and they were special. They were new, and she needed Charlie to see them. She heard the front door open, and she came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on her apron.

“Hey, you’re finally back! I let myself in, sorry. I probably shouldn’t have just come in like this but I hoped you wouldn’t mind too much.”

She reached out and grabbed her wine glass, using the drink to buy herself a few moments to think. Was it too fast? If Charlie was honest with herself, the only time life felt like it was moving at the right speed was when she was with Ember. None of this felt fast or dangerous, it just felt right. The wine felt warm and rich on her tongue and it reminded her of kissing Ember goodnight after a long day. After working all day and coming home to make dinner together. After some tv time and showers and paying bills or doing laundry. After everything life put in their way, they would climb into bed together and every night she would lean over and kiss Ember goodnight. The more she thought about it, the more she wanted to get back to that feeling of comfort and home.

Putting the glass back down on the table, Charlie reached over and took Ember’s hand, squeezing it softly. “You are not a routine Ems. We may have settled into a pattern in our daily lives, but nothing about being with you was ever routine. I loved our life together and I am more than happy to be here with you doing the things we used to do. I love you Ember and there is nowhere I would rather be than eating pizza with you on a Friday night.”

Ember was more than nervous to hear Charlie’s answer. She didn’t want the other woman to feel like this was too much. She finally felt like things were falling perfectly into place, and that was something she didn’t realize she needed until it began happening. She was terrified that she wouldn’t want this.. that she wouldn’t want things to go back to the way they used to be. She couldn’t blame her though if this wasn’t good for her.

As Charlie began to speak, Ember let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. She squeezed her hand back. “I love you too,” she told her quietly. “And there’s no place I’d rather be either. This.. this is where I’m meant to be.”

She moved around the table, setting down their glasses before working to open the wine. Everything felt easy and clear, the way things had always felt in day to day life with Ember. Charlie had not been looking for a relationship when she first met Ember, but the other woman made her laugh and it didn’t take long for Charlie to become addicted to being around her. There was something so easy about sharing a space with Ember and Charlie could feel herself slipping back into the same patterns they had worked out in the two years they had lived together.

She sat down in her chair, the same seat she ad claimed hundreds of time before. As she reached across the table to pour the wine, she wondered if slipping into old, comfortable routines would become the norm for them now.

“So… pizza, wine, making out on the couch… this is turning into a regular old Friday night for us…”

When she set the plates down, her stomach grumbled loudly. The familiarity of all of this made Ember smile. She watched as Charlie poured the wine, and she immediately reached for her glass once it was filled, and brought it to her lips. She took a long drink of it before setting it back down, reaching to pull a few slices of pizza onto her plate. 

“Yeah, it is.. Is that a bad thing?” Ember asked. “I don’t know how you feel about it, us getting back into routine so easily..” She let out a sigh. “If this is too much too fast and you don’t want us falling into routine again, just say the word, okay?”