E.Sweet

the first ever pride flag (1978) versus the TMP movie poster (1979)

Sabine: I'm all ears.

Later

Obi Wan: I DON'T WANNA!

Obi Wan just sighs.

Rex: (dying of laughter)

He immediately goes to Yoda for advice because he has no idea what he’s supposed to do right now.

Yoda: Authorized to officiate weddings I am, hmm? Help the Commander with this, I can.

Leia is upset she was evacuated “for her safety” and didn’t get to shoot Vader either.

She and Cody bond over the privation.

There are many Mandos, clones, and one (1) Quinlan Vos that are eagerly trying to support Cody and Leia’s dreams by supplying a variety of weapons and custom made targets featuring Sith portraits.

Obi-Wan: It is not my empire.

Cody, living his best life: Our empire, cyare, of course.

Obi-Wan: It’s a republic.

He finally gets an actual election set up but then everyone just votes for him as Emperor anyway. There wasn’t even an emperor option.

Supposing Darth Sidious/Emperor Palpatine is still alive at this point, he makes some grand statement saying how there can only be one Emperor.

Some very fearless acolytes keep a little scoreboard in the torture break room that has a time since Vader was last overheard saying “Kenobi.”

Palpatine: I should have left you to burn on Mustafar.

It doesn't help that APPEARENTLY Kenobi has CHILDREN. Baby Kenobis.

Baby Kenobis.

Palpatine doesn’t get nightmares. He doesn’t. But maybe he has one or twelve dreams-that-are-definitely-not-visions-nope-nuh-uh that are… Look, he’s a Sith Lord. The Sith Lord. He doesn’t get “scared” and “apprehensive,” he strikes fear into the hearts of everyone who dares to oppose him. But, just maybe, there’s one (1) thing that causes him… mild concern…….. And the thought of Kenobi having spawned, thereby giving his apprentice even more reasons to utter that name and more people to obsess over….

But they also adopted some cute little children too! Luke loves being a big brother.

Was the Senator having an affair with the Sith dude? Did she and Skywalker die tragically at the hands of their former lover? Is Kenobi the ex? Is there some kind of tragic twins separated at birth situation going on here (except most people think it’s like, Anakin Skywalker and Darth Vader. Or Darth Vader and Obi-Wan)?

There are some very out there ideas, but the general consensus actually ends up being almost close to the truth, if the truth were being reflected through a bunch of fun house mirrors.

"It's a 'good twin, evil twin' situation. The Sith, old Palpy, probably wanted them to grow up evil which is why he had Vader."

"Are you implying Emperor Kenobi is the evil twin?"

"Well not anymore, the Jedi raised it out of him."

General consensus is, Padme had an affair with Vader, but an unwilling one. She thought it would keep her love, Skywalker, safe from the war. But it didn't work and Vader killed them both. Obi Wan is raising his nephew since he and Vader are brothers by blood and he and Anakin were brothers by choice.

Obi-Wan walks in on them scheming hanging out, sighs, and walks back out.

Ahsoka: Oooooh! Godhood! He's going to HATE that! Rex! Logistics on raising Obi Wan to godhood!

"in the age of no body shaming, there is still one thing you're allowed to body shame apparently, and that is men with small dicks. Greta Thunberg was arguing on Twitter with a guy called Andrew Tate, who is on house arrest in Romania, for sex trafficking. Do you know what she said? 'you have small dick energy'. She could have said 'Andrew, you're on house arrest, in Romania, for sex trafficking' but apparently on the list of crimes that rates below having a small dick."

That's not how hurtful language works. If you're against using these as insults and put-downs, you are against them. You do not have the moral superiority if you're willing to use these ideas or words against someone just because you don't agree with them.

bly deserves a pretty dress

commander cody also deserves a pretty dress

It doesn't matter if the Jedi made mistakes or were flawed. It truly truly doesn't, it's SO beyond the point of this narrative it's not even funny.

The POINT of the death of the Jedi is that you can do everything right and still lose. And even more so, you can be the most moral, compassionate, selfless person in the galaxy and it won't matter if everyone around you has decided to be selfless and greedy.

The point of the death of the Jedi is that they seem like this group that should be nearly impossible to take down, they're full of powerful people who can do powerful things, they've got laser swords and magic powers and can jump really far and run really fast, and they use all of this to do nothing but HELP PEOPLE all the time, and in the end they all die because no one around them wanted to do the same. Fascism is a group effort, it's not the work of one dude or even two. Yes, Palpatine comes in and abuses the system to do bad things, but his entire plan relies on THOUSANDS of people choosing to do bad things with him. Anakin, yes, but also the corporate alliance and Dooku and Jango and Grievous and Maul and the Geonosians and the Kaminoans and Tarkin and so so so many Senators (enough that a Delegation of 2000 feels like their efforts are likely a shot in the dark). The Jedi are doing EVERYTHING RIGHT, they're heroes who give their lives to save others, but they're surrounded by people who wouldn't do the same, and that's what kills them.

THAT'S the point. The Jedi being flawed completely bypasses that point entirely. Focusing on "mistakes" the Jedi might have made, or flaws they might have, means that you're now completely ignoring the entire message about how fighting BACK against fascism and evil is ALSO a group effort. The Jedi cannot do it alone, and if enough people are not standing up to darkness with them, IT IS GUARANTEED TO WIN. Even the most powerful, most selfless people in the world can't stand up against a galaxy full of people prepared to submit to their own fears.

He is played obviously camp and dramatic, for a start, and there is the aforementioned "hate your hair/not likely/yikes yikes yikes/let me guess you have a great personality" summary dismissal of all his potential brides. Then he spends dinner asking Yzma about Kronk ("so he seems nice? He's what, in his late twenties?") and otherwise being slightly obsessed with him.

Then there is the whole Adventure of Doom with Pacha, him being ever huffy about the Kiss of Life, and then the restaurant gag where Kuzco takes to playing Pacha's fake wife and dressing up in ladies' clothing with great gusto (reinforced by the waitress' "bless you for coming out in public" remark when Pacha says they're on their honeymoon). Then when he is finally de-llamafied, we don't see him paired off with the obligatory girl from the lineup earlier, as might otherwise be expected in a Disney movie. Instead he is still single, but goes to found family it up with Pacha, Chica, Kronk, etc, which dare we remark is a very queer trope.

In short, I have no idea how a Disney movie with no white people (all the characters are Indigenous/people of color), a gay king, cross-dressing jokes, and the most offbeat plot of all time actually ever got made (can you imagine the Family Friendly Mouse doing that today? Let us also talk about Kronk because he is a brilliant deconstruction of both toxic masculinity and the musclebound henchman stereotype.) Other than that this was the Chaos Hour of animated movies in the late 90s/early 2000s, and yes.

Please, read this article if you have some time. This story is wild, and involves directors being pitted against each other Bake-Off style and a shockingly intimate documentary created by the wife of Sting who, himself was heartbroken by the decimation of the songs he wrote for the film including cutting a fantastic Yzma villain song sung by Eartha Kitt that is SO DAMN GOOD but would not ever have fit the more nailed-down Yzma we would eventually come to know and love. It’s so catchy though, I’m doubling up on calls to action but please listen now: