He cleared his throat anxiously, something that happened more whenever they were hanging out. Zay didnāt mind what she did in the slightest, but it was still a bit uncomfortable for him to discuss sex so openlyā ala, the craft store. He had missed most of the standardĀ ālocker roomā discussions that happened in high school, as well as sex education, and even though heād had sex beforeā¦Zay felt that he was in a constant battle of catch-up. What was he catching up to, he wasnāt sure, but it had to have been something.Ā āUh, if I was a subscriber I think Iād be happy just to see your ass at all,ā he shrugged with a light blush creeping over his cheekbones,Ā āI donāt know if that helps at all, but I do think you should go for it.āĀ
Zay hung back and held the basket as Nel scanned the colors. He wasnāt an artist by any means, but the fact that there were over one hundred shades of blue made his head hurt. Whatever happened to just light blue and dark blue? His eyes shot down at the toes of his shoesā they were getting pretty worn out. Heād have to start owning two pairs of shoes at a time.Ā āWhy not? Youāve been there before and, you know, thereās some really pretty landscaping in the back that we could use to change the scenery,ā he suggested. She would look so pretty lying nude in the grass, especially since flowers were starting to bloom.Ā āAlli and Sanem leave me alone most of the time, and Joey is usually out and about. I donāt think theyād even realize I had a girl over,ā Zay tookĀ a step next to Nel, grabbing some orange to toss in the basket.Ā
āYouāre rightā I didnāt tell anybody that youā¦weā¦,ā he glanced back at the wall of color before settling to look into her eyes. A sheepish smile crossed his face as he continued to speak.Ā āItās not my business to tell, yāknow? They know that Iāve been hanging out with you, andā¦,ā they know that Iāve completely flipped my lid about you.
āAlli, uh,, she actually found a picture on my laptop from when we started, uhā¦working together,ā he admitted,Ā āIā I mustāve forgotten to X out of it before getting food a-and she suggested you actuallyā¦come over for dinner, or something sometimeā¦,ā he felt like an ass. He shouldāve been on his laptop in his own room instead of the dining room, but of course he needed to be closer to the refrigerator.Ā āShe thinks youāre pretty and, I guess, she wants to just meet you or something,ā he babbled.Ā
It was a bit hard to get used to, if she was being honest. Someone being nice for once. There wasnāt anything malice or not genuine about Zay-- if there was, she knew that it would have been the softest, most pure insult she had ever heard. It would be a back handed compliment, except with no ill-will.Ā āI appreciate your approval, Z,ā Nel bit at her lip, eyes taunting their way back to him. Be careful, she thought. This can get you in serious trouble.Ā
There wasnāt much to hide when all of your dignity was spread over the internet. That was by choice, and she wasnāt ashamed about it. Not unless someone tried to undermine her success or work ethic. Nel was one of the most hard working that she knew, sheād fully commit that trait to herself. It wasnāt hard to see that she would help anyone with any shift at the bar or diner, and she was doing OnlyFans as her main contribution of money. At the same time, she didnāt want to flaunt her body to everyone she met. That wasnāt how she worked, nor was it the impression that she wanted other people to see. Just because she was a sex worker didnāt mean she was looking for attention.Ā āYeah, I guess we can try that,ā Nel would feel better knowing that there wasnāt anyone else there to see her. Maybe she wouldnāt have to be fully nude. There was just something about being with Zay that made her feel that she had to work at a higher standard than most-- maybe she wanted to be better because of him. It wasnāt a feeling casual to her.Ā
āI didnāt mean it like that,ā She quickly iterated, not wanting Zay to feel that he had to be a certain way around her. Talk about her in a certain way. All he had to do was advocate for her... as a friend.Ā āRight, I appreciate that. I-I mean, you donāt have to lie to them if they say anything...,ā A bit of a trail off sent her eyes back to the man again, wondering if he would mention it if it was brought up. She wondered if he would be ashamed.Ā āI donāt-- well, I donāt want you to feel like... uncomfortable with all this. You know?āĀ
A slow nod elicited from Nelās neck, her eyes troubling down to the floor. Without him having to even tell anyone, someone knew. This person in Zayās life most likely questioning why a woman would interfere with someone so innocent-- her worst nightmare would be to have someone think she was taking advantage of the boy. In reality, she was. Having a friend was one of the most comforting feelings in the world-- all of her secrets? She knew theyād be locked and sealed under Zayās discretion.Ā āDinner...,ā A few more nods engaged.Ā āI-I mean, uh,ā She put a few paint brushes in the basket, her eyes not involved in the task at hand anymore. They were more racking her head again the fact that sheād have to explain to someone in Zayās friendship proximity that she wasnāt illegally hiring him for sex work.Ā āSo she believed you when you said we were friends, huh?ā A slight laugh left her lips.Ā āI donāt know if most people would believe you if you said you were real life friends with the girl sitting in front of a camera with her legs open.ā