You ever get that feeling where you just want to disappear from your current life? Move some place new, some place far where you don’t know people. Move away from the people you know and you every day life. That feeling where you feel so uneasy living in this presence, that you just want to leave all of it behind and go find yourself? Yeah, that’s it, go find yourself. I feel so lost after all that’s happened. I feel like I’ve lost the very person I’ve worked so hard to be, so hard to find. I feel so distant from my own self that I struggle in the tasks that appear before me. How is it possible to do something when you don’t even feel like you’re your own self? I’m lost & i don’t know how to change that because I feel a sense of obligation & personal will to stay exactly where I am.

All I know is I have him. He's with me & that should be enough to keep these doubts and insecurities away.

I just want to be happy & feel safe and loved without questions or doubts. & i want that with you. I’m tired of people interfering & letting people interfere with what and who makes me happy. I just want to live life without feeling scared I’ll get hurt again. & I want you to make me feel less scared because you won’t hurt me again. & I know you’re trying, because I’m trying too. I’m working on my end of things while you’re working on yours, but I just want to reach the end result already. I just want to be happy & feel safe and loved by you.