Imagine this
- You wake up. You lay in bed with that special beautiful person by your side, and you hold them against you, skin tight. You are shirtless, flat and comfortable with your body. You couldn’t be a happier person than you are right now.
- You wake up and put a shirt on, only a shirt. You haven’t owned a binder for many years now. You no longer have to layer yourself. You feel free.
- You can now wear those clothes you really liked in the shop. You bought them; they fit and suit you perfectly. No more baggy, ugly clothes.
- You look in the mirror and see your sharp jaw line, facial hair and adam’s apple. Your eyebrows are thick and your hairline is masculine. You smile, because you finally love and feel comfortable with the way you look. You feel attractive.
- You are walking down the street and the warm breeze hits your chest from underneath your shirt. You can feel the wind, it gives you shivers.
- You can stand up straight, run, swim and hike. You are no longer in pain. You enjoy being able to use your body and exercise to its potential.
- You can sleep over at another person’s house, hug, dance and cuddle without worrying about your binder.
- You speak in front of your family, friends and peers; your voice is deep and mellow, you feel confident. You are no longer afraid to speak, nowadays people can’t shut you up!
- Your family sends you birthday cards: “Son!” / “Brother!” / “Uncle!” / “Father!” - They accept you for who you are.
- You look down and touch your chest. You no longer find your body unnatural or misplaced. It is now what it was always meant to be.
- You use the men’s toilets and locker room. You no longer feel scared or paranoid, it’s just a toilet/locker room. It’s natural.
- You look at your birth certificate, ID and passport, it has “M” next to sex.
- The elderly neighbour asks, “How are you, son?”
- The shop keeper asks, “Would you like a bag with that, sir?”
- Your peers all refer to you as “He” and “Him”
Keep holding on. Transition is a slow and painful process, but you will see these things happen to you. Maybe not now, but they will come, and that is why you need to stay strong and keep pushing forward. You deserve happiness and to love your body, and you will as long as you keep going. Soon, I promise.
