It’s a tremendous sorrow that ache in your soul. And there’s an empty void that can’t be filled. It’s like everything has stopped blooming. We stopped smiling, the skies stopped shining, it rains heavily in the heart and it’s just not the same anymore.
We can’t tell someone who has lost somebody to be strong. How can they be? When they’ve lost their precious ones. Cliche yet it hurts. I hate it either when someone told me to do so. It’s a sorrow that only the heart and the soul could feel it. The one’s who felt it, understands it. Having someone who loves you is Allah greatest gift. The ones who loves unconditionally. The one who knows all the scars and still loves for whom you are.
Even when our feeling are okay, at times whe tend to miss them. We look at children’s we remembered all those fond memories that we created when we are with them. We look at our parents, we wish they never grow old. We wish they would stay the same until we grew old. We look at our friends happy family, we wish our family are like that too. WE WISH.
The truth is, we keep on feeding our soul with the memories we created just to embrace another day. That’s the strength we got to live life.
Kita semua manusia. Rindu adalah fitrah. Dan rindu itu mampu membunuh jiwa. Terlalu tajam. Enough said.
The most hardest part about losing someone is that, we don’t get the chance to feel and touch them. Anymore. Yes, WE MAKE DU'A. But at times, when we miss them badly, when we wanted to hug them, they’re just not there. We regret things we wanted to do but didn’t do. We cried our hearts out.
Jiwa kita at times tetap akan memberontak. Questioning on why this why that. Soalan yang, kita dah ada jawapan tapi kita sendiri tak nak akui. We fear the answer. The pain is not the same for everyone. Yes, i know.
Penerimaan kita terhadap cuaca kehidupan adalah berbeza beza. Bergantung pada individu. Persekitaran. Tak boleh pukul rata. Setiap individu ada personaliti yang berbeza beza. Sebab tu penerimaan terhadap perspektif kehidupan setiap individu adalah berbeza beza. Ada orang lepas 3 tahun kehilangan, dia recover. Ada orang lepas 7 tahun kehilangan, dia masih belum mampu melepaskan sepenuhnya. Ada orang, sampai bila bila tak mampu melangkah maju. Ibarat, patah sebelah sayap.
Grieving or losing someone, is not something that we should not care. Because, it’s an unbeareble pain to the soul that is unseen with naked eyes. Some repress their feelings. Truth is, nothing heals. Time doesn’t heals anything. It just numb the feelings. We learn to adapt from their absence. And as time goes by, we get used to it.
That’s the hardest part with human soul. We’re complex. We, at times try to understand ourself, but end up not knowing what we really want.
(sabah,malaysia,april,2019)
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