Irl Fantasy Dwarf

if I got carried away by the harpies I would accept my fate because I respect women

I do not remember liking this, but clearly past me has good taste

“I do declare, I have me here a parcel for ya.”

i was in a thrift shop the other day and they were playing the most unsettling variations of normal christmas music, culminating in this rendition of the 12 days of christmas except it was like 12 guys all singing over each other and going “no!” and interrupting the lyrics with random other phrases until they deadass just started singing 5 golden rings to toto’s africa. can anyone confirm that this is a real song and not that i stroked so hard i astral projected into a universe where everything is somehow worse than it is here

this is what my anxiety attacks sound like

Oh I needed this laugh this evening. Thank you so much.

Tumblr are you OK? It’s december and you’ve hardly even touched your “twelve days of Christmas by straight no chaser”