born in grief, raised in hate

Hair: Irresistible Longing

Forehead: Blessing/Friendship

Eyelid: Adoration

Ear: Temptation

The Bridge of Nose: Treasuring

Cheek: Dear/Kindness/Satisfaction

Lips: Love

Throat: Desire

Nape: Deep Attachment

Back: Confirmation

Chest: Possession

Arm: Affection/Adoration

Wrist: Desire/Lust

Back of Hand: Respect/Love

Palm of Hand: Begging/Entreaty

Fingertip: Praise/Admiration

Tummy: You-will-always-come-back-to-me

Waist: Binding

Thigh: Control

Leg: Obedience

Instep: Subordination

Tip of the Toe: Worship/Idolize

he had heard (well, eavesdropped) plenty of “horror” stories of women posing as helpless victims to earn themselves a one-way ticket into an ignorant man’s bed. a roofie or two later, the man would regain consciousness without his valuables, if he was lucky enough not to have encountered an assassin. women were less direct, but it wasn’t much of a challenging game to figure out what their ulterior motives were. in this particular case, jongin guessed his company needed a place to stay for the night and he looked like the only “attractive” (literally) option in a crowd of drunken barbarians.

for jongin, who had never truly understood the significance of family nor felt the loving glow of a home, sunyoung’s words already felt like an icy shard in his heart. “don’t compare me to you,” he snarled under his breath, his tone of voice so very much like hers in the way it thundered like a beast’s roar. “if i had somewhere i belonged, i sure as hell would protect it with my fucking life.” even jongin knew that he had been birthed and raised in unfavorable circumstances, although his hardships hadn’t twisted his good intentions and true heart. if sunyoung really was his long-lost sister--his actual sister--no sum of money could undermine her value to him as he believed certain loyalties ran deeper than blood. yet, if sunyoung truly thought the way she did, he wasn’t sure he wanted a sibling--not her, anyway.

“so you show up now to tell me you’d kill me if i didn’t believe you?” he scoffed again. “some sister you are.” he almost accused her of being the reason her current family was deteriorating (with an attitude like that, it wasn’t surprising), but he decided not to hit that low below the belt. it wasn’t worth it.

jongin had always hated altercations because the majority of his life had been nothing but, until he discovered that it was easier running away than confronting his nightmares. he had disobeyed his mother, betrayed his father, and was on the brink of abandoning yet another family member. why couldn’t his relationships ever be normal? why did they always have to be so mentally taxing, emotionally draining, and twisted beyond conventional means? perhaps he was better off “living in his own trash,” isolated from people who could only make him feel lonelier. it was easier to turn sunyoung away despite the fact she could actually be a threat in the future. it was easier, and yet--

with half his attention pinned on dinner and the other half divided between junmyeon and the porn, jongin really couldn’t focus on idle conversation, or lack thereof. “i don’t think it really does, i was just kinda curious-- you’ve got it pretty easy, i’d say that’s natural,” he shrugged. “i mean, i’m always horny.” if junmyeon considered his glamour-less nature to be freakish, jongin couldn’t imagine where his would lie on that same spectrum. "seriously? you have a dick, hyung, it’s kind of normal for your brain to tell you to shove it in things, all the time,” he grinned in amusement.

jongin felt for a second, though, that sunyoung’s voice was far too familiar and the way she gazed at him provoking a sense of belonging and security he had never felt before. it was odd to feel so connected to a stranger within an hour of exchanging some semblance of a civil introduction, especially to one that had approached him with a bounty on his head. sister? perhaps that much was a stretch because he had never known what it felt like to have a picture-perfect family with a sibling to share half the burden and happiness with. but, jongin knew in his gut (and that had never failed him before) that losing sunyoung would be like abandoning any hope for a normal life where he wouldn’t be an outcast but “little bro” to someone he could learn to hold dear.

sister? it did have a nice ring to it.

he ruffled the back of his head and wore a tired, toothy grin when she spoke as if she was doing him a favor, keeping him alive and all. he might have ran from a couple conflicts in the past but hiding had never been very jongin-esque; if sunyoung wanted his head next time, he was going to be in plain sight. “that’s heartwarming, warning me you’ll pop a cap in my head and leaving your number to catch up,” he chuckled and tilted his head slightly. “can’t make up your mind, can you?” at this point, jongin even doubted sunyoung would have it in her to assassinate him for twenty grand, let alone ten, if she was positive they were blood-related. would she murder her own “little bro” for something so expendable like money?

“so, you expect me to believe you, and i don’t, you’ll put a fucking bullet through my brain?” the stoic expression on his face twisted into something angry and hurt. “i’ve lived my entire life thinking i was alone, and then you show up, shoving this crap down my throat and telling me i could have had this all along.” but things never were picture perfect; his alleged sister was now threatening his life because he refused to believe she was supposed to fucking be there this whole time. “where the hell were you?” he asked, words hushed and sharpened with a deeply rooted pain. “where the hell were you when i needed you?”

“oh, you won’t be regretting anything if you’re heading in the direction i think you’re heading,” he promised her with a sly smile. he knew how these bar encounters always ended up; it usually involved an attractive woman tangled in his limbs and an after-sex cigarette pinched between his lips. her flirtatious advances made the probability of that outcome far more likely, even if jongin wasn’t particularly in the mood to flatter his company. it certainly didn’t hurt to have arm and eye candy to put the cherry on top to his otherwise dull evening.