RADICAL OPTIMISM.

well, i'm sure you've seen me everywhere since i broke up with my fiance, thank god. but i got a new german shepherd puppy a few weeks ago and oh my, he is the cutest thing ever! he is such a good boy, and i'm taking him, and my other dog tank and hiding in my new home in the florida keys so people can stop asking me about my love life. i'm single, and ready to fucking mingle. @hazestarters

I did hear about it! That's such a shame, he lost a beautiful woman. His loss, to be honest. Congrats! Did you give a name to your puppy yet? They're so adorable. Yuck, I hate when people pester others about their love lives, like it genuinely none of your concern.

So I decided not to roam the streets of Coachella this year and am I allowed to say I’m highly regretting it? Turns out I’m back on my hermit shit wanting to live in the woods for ten thousand years. Besides, I don’t think I’d be able to handle the bombastic side eye from fans wondering where Reputation TV is. I love my Swifties, but I try not to fuck with them as much as possible. Anyone who knows me personally knows I already get enough of that from the three felines that own me. Anyway, I’m so sad that I missed screaming, ‘fuck the patriarchy!’ with Green Day, shaking my non-existent goodies with Ciara and Megan Thee Stallion (as if I could ever shake anything like they can), and getting brat with Charli XCX. And Lady Gaga? Ugh… don’t even get me started. Hi! I’m Taylor and did you go to Coachella these past couple weekends so I can live vicariously through you? If not, have you ever been? What were some of your favorite performances there? @hazestarters

I decided the same thing, but now I'm getting major FOMO vibes. I truly don't miss getting the sand up in my nostrils and eating the overpriced food, but other than that, the lineup this year was sooo fucking good and I'm insanely jealous. I wish I saw Meg's performance, and Lady Gaga... I'm just facepalming at myself. I've been vacationing in my home country, Albania. I honestly loved Blackpink's performance in 2022? If that was the year they were on main stage.