Being an Alien

This post is to encourage those people, INFPs in particular, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Infp’s have a weakness of falling into a pit of despair at least once in their life. How long they will stay there depends on the person.

It can get pretty dark and horrible. Anxiety and depression are common. As well doing stupid new things that we actually know are stupid.

Because INFPs are unhealthy, the Fi really comes out so they can get pretty focused on themselves. If they are super unhealthy they will try to turn off their emotions. This will lead to stupid decisions that are rationalized in the INFPs head.

If this sounds like you, dont worry. I promise you arent alone. I know what you feel like. I have survived the period where i was lost.

Find the people who will pull you out and not drag you deeper. Look to the people you pushed away while you were going down this path. Take some time to introvert. Focus on the root of what your problems are.

Its important for you to realise that this is not the end of your story and you have much more to see through.

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5 Habits to Boost Self Confidence

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Since its founding in 2007, Tumblr has always been a place for wide open, creative self-expression at the heart of community and culture. To borrow from our founder David Karp, we’re proud to have inspired a generation of artists, writers, creators, curators, and crusaders to redefine our culture and to help empower individuality.

Over the past several months, and inspired by our storied past, we’ve given serious thought to who we want to be to our community moving forward and have been hard at work laying the foundation for a better Tumblr. We’ve realized that in order to continue to fulfill our promise and place in culture, especially as it evolves, we must change. Some of that change began with fostering more constructive dialogue among our community members. Today, we’re taking another step by no longer allowing adult content, including explicit sexual content and nudity (with some exceptions).  

Let’s first be unequivocal about something that should not be confused with today’s policy change: posting anything that is harmful to minors, including child pornography, is abhorrent and has no place in our community. We’ve always had and always will have a zero tolerance policy for this type of content. To this end, we continuously invest in the enforcement of this policy, including industry-standard machine monitoring, a growing team of human moderators, and user tools that make it easy to report abuse. We also closely partner with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and the Internet Watch Foundation, two invaluable organizations at the forefront of protecting our children from abuse, and through these partnerships we report violations of this policy to law enforcement authorities. We can never prevent all bad actors from attempting to abuse our platform, but we make it our highest priority to keep the community as safe as possible.

So what is changing?

Posts that contain adult content will no longer be allowed on Tumblr, and we’ve updated our Community Guidelines to reflect this policy change. We recognize Tumblr is also a place to speak freely about topics like art, sex positivity, your relationships, your sexuality, and your personal journey. We want to make sure that we continue to foster this type of diversity of expression in the community, so our new policy strives to strike a balance.

Why are we doing this?

It is our continued, humble aspiration that Tumblr be a safe place for creative expression, self-discovery, and a deep sense of community. As Tumblr continues to grow and evolve, and our understanding of our impact on our world becomes clearer, we have a responsibility to consider that impact across different age groups, demographics, cultures, and mindsets. We spent considerable time weighing the pros and cons of expression in the community that includes adult content. In doing so, it became clear that without this content we have the opportunity to create a place where more people feel comfortable expressing themselves.

Bottom line: There are no shortage of sites on the internet that feature adult content. We will leave it to them and focus our efforts on creating the most welcoming environment possible for our community.

So what’s next?

Starting December 17, 2018, we will begin enforcing this new policy. Community members with content that is no longer permitted on Tumblr will get a heads up from us in advance and steps they can take to appeal or preserve their content outside the community if they so choose. All changes won’t happen overnight as something of this complexity takes time.

Another thing, filtering this type of content versus say, a political protest with nudity or the statue of David, is not simple at scale. We’re relying on automated tools to identify adult content and humans to help train and keep our systems in check. We know there will be mistakes, but we’ve done our best to create and enforce a policy that acknowledges the breadth of expression we see in the community.

Most importantly, we’re going to be as transparent as possible with you about the decisions we’re making and resources available to you, including more detailed information, product enhancements, and more content moderators to interface directly with the community and content.

Like you, we love Tumblr and what it’s come to mean for millions of people around the world. Our actions are out of love and hope for our community. We won’t always get this right, especially in the beginning, but we are determined to make your experience a positive one.

There are certainly many great things about being an INFP personality type. We’re highly creative individuals who inspire others. We have a rich inner world that allows us to escape the dryness of a life filled with routine and structure.

We show an amazing amount of compassion for others, despite being so different from the rest of the population. We’re deeply sensitive and caring, and the best part is that we usually don’t expect anything from anyone in return.

Yet, I feel there are a few challenges to being an INFP. Here are seven of them. INFPs, can you relate?

1. Never really being able to finish anything you start

We live in a world of endless possibilities, and we INFPs always want to explore something new. We are often good at starting something, but we are rarely able to finish as we expected — or worse, never at all.

If I were to write a list of things that I had started but left incomplete, I wonder if even that list would be completed. I have enrolled in tons of online courses over the years but I haven’t completed a single one. I barely finish any book I buy, and I don’t think I’ve ever watched a full season of any TV series.

I know our souls don’t know a thing about deadlines, but unfortunately, our bosses and professors do.

I was quite excited when I started out writing this article, but I feel really lucky to have completed it.

2. Not being assertive enough

When we’re alone, we often find ourselves playing a conversation with our best friend in our head, but when he or she shows up, we go quiet.

We have a rich inner world where we often speculate about ideal possibilities. But sometimes it acts more like a cage and prevents the words within us from finding their way out.

We are not assertive enough when it really matters, even if we were really excited and motivated going into the situation.

For example, I find it impossible to study the day before an exam even when I have not yet studied anything. I had not even started my physics project till the day before the submission deadline, but even on that day, I barely did anything. I am not much different from my peers, except that they do study the day before the exam, and they do complete the project before the deadline.

We usually procrastinate till the end, but even at the final moment, we make most of our decisions by either thinking, “Just let it go” or “Let’s see what happens.”

3. Over-planning or no planning at all

There are times when we check out every single book on a subject from the library, bookmark every single article available on the web, and watch every single video on YouTube. But we end up being confused and simply can’t figure out how to start planning our next travel adventure or writing our novel. Then we finally realize that this over-research was simply a way of procrastinating.

And there are times when we simply go with our gut feeling, with little or no planning at all. We simply move forward without caring about the details (thanks to our focus on the big picture), only to realize that we should have done a bit of research beforehand.

I wish I could be in the middle of this spectrum, but unfortunately, I often end up being on either extreme.

4. Offering compassion to people who don’t care about you

I don’t understand why I worry about inconveniencing the store clerk when he simply refuses to hear me. I don’t understand why I feel sorry for the professor who is correcting my not-so-perfect assignment who never seemed to care about my education.

I never understand why I feel guilty when I do not buy something from a salesperson (just because he used a few cute words), even though I know that it’s his job, and he just cares about his own profit.

5. Spending your energy constantly validating yourself instead of focusing on your goals

I don’t know how many I times I just keep telling myself that what I’m doing is okay, and I should not bother if someone does not like my idea. We INFPs sometimes move through a cycle of constant self-approval instead of working our way toward our goals.

For example, I want to start my own location-independent business rather than go to college. I know that in order to do that, I’ll need to develop some skills. I had this thought about four months ago, and a month later, I enrolled in college.

I have not taken any steps to start my business because I spend my time reassuring myself that I’m on the right track and I should just focus on the present. Today, I am exactly where I started. Had I focused on developing the relevant skills, I wouldn’t be enrolling for the next semester.

6. Worrying about helping others when the one who you should be helping is yourself

Even when we have no idea how we’ll pay our rent, we feel sorry for not giving money to a homeless person our own way home from being fired from our job.

I simply wish I could just let go when I come across moments when I find someone asking for help. But my highly sensitive soul simply doesn’t allow me to do so.

7. Having high standards but a low self-esteem

We think that we should be a Pulitzer Prize-winning author, but we do not want to enroll in a writing course because we feel we do not deserve that sort of luxury.

We think we should be able to code the next Facebook, but we are afraid of even trying to learn to code, because we feel we are not worth it.

We realize we need many things to achieve that “something,” but we feel unworthy of anything.

And that’s the only reason we feel like we’ve never achieved anything. Our high standards often backfire and lead us nowhere.

Despite all of theses problems, I love being an INFP. I just often find myself laughing at myself and wondering what on earth I am.

As an INTP, i want to share with all of you a couple of things i love about the INFPs i have met in my life (some of them still being parts of it)

They’ll try to understand you without care about how complex your thoughts and feelings are.

They can make you feel happy and loved.

They notice and like your passion when you talk about your ideas, things you learn, things you find fascinating. So, they listen to you with attention and try to contribute a little bit.

Have a great sense of humor.

B e s t m e m e s

The most interesting emotional and philosophic conversation (ephemeral)

They have interesting facts and points of view about art (painting, literature, etc) and can recommend you amazing books to read.

Open minded (in general)

They use logic mixed with more of their ideals and values; the worth they give it, is beautiful.

Educated people, know about general culture and geeks things (cine, music, t.v, comics, mangas, etc) So they’ll recommend you more geeks things.

Unconditional support.

Reciprocal teaching. You show them your nerd things, your ideas, theories and hypothesis and they do the same. The difference is the way this things are.

Maybe they will not remember all the things you told to them but they remember your happiness when you talked about it.

February 2018