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(warning: long post) Okay, a little while back I was an HVAC technician working for a company here in the limp wang of the country, Florida.

While schlepping myself around repairing, installing, duct taping and in general making sh*t happen in a all together too sweaty living I’ve met many different kinds of people. Some love it when you show up because they’re sweaty and miserable and they know you’ll make them as frosty as an ice queen by the time you blow out of there; and others just f*cking hate you because you happen to be the avatar of their cheapness come to visit them in their hour of defeat.

Now when installing an AC system, legally, you need to have it inspected by the County or City Building Dept. Usually these inspections are cursory at best and a real bear if you’ve drawn a pissed off inspector. Or if not pissed off, someone looking for a bribe(this is Florida, bribery is a part of life).

This day I drew a man looking for a bigger than normal bribe. Typically, it’s $50. This guy wanted $150. Sh*t, my take-home on the job was only $200 and I wasn’t about to split that with an over-zealous a**hole with a clipboard.

I refused to pay and he struck my inspection card with the big red pen. This meant that he found everything incorrectly installed, even if he didn’t look. The miserable f*ck. This meant I had to reapply for another inspection at $100(the first one’s free). So this a**hole had cost me time AND money. This meant vengeance!