duckfoot's words (and pictures) of wisdom

the older i get the more i can understand why people back in the old fairytale days would just fuck off and be a hermit in the woods. just chilling out in the middle of nowhere and occasionally telling random heroes cryptic shit. living the fucking dream.

When you’re pretty enough to take over a fashion show. [video]

Jesus Christ, I don’t understand why people get weirdly judgemental over the smallest things you do. Like dude, cut your shit, I’m out here living my best life, I don’t need your judgy looks or commentary you bitter goblin.

Me, whenever the DuoLingo owl starts harassing me to do my practice

every fall teenage girls are like.. “oh , im gonna enter a place of business and order a product which is offered by that place of business because i like the flavor of it” and honestly? how dare they. that’s so annoying. why can’t they buy the beverage that i, a smart man, would prefer to drink

Probably because they’re generally indifferent to the flavor of it and rather use it for in group/out group signalling like the giant basic bitch wall-decorations-from-target early childhood education/nutrition hive mind they are.

dude shut the fuck up lol

ok i spend all day with teenagers and am paid to educate them and let me tell you most of my girls may love leggings (comfy) and iced coffees (yummy) but i have never, NEVER, seen thirty of them spend a solid month all playing the same boring goddamn video game or had to pry them off their tablets and phones the day some ugly-ass overpriced sneaker drops try and get a group of teenage boys to all stop making the same fucking meme reference all. goddamn. day. then, and ONLY then, can you talk to me about hive mind

Can you imagine being a middle or high school teacher when Pickle Rick dropped.

Y’all are wrong, it’s all about “what’s your Fortnite dance?” It transcends genders.

English teacher culture is when you have to teach your students something you never actually learned in school because no one bothered to teach advanced english students basic grammar and assumed they’d know it inherently so you look up the rules five minutes before class and then pretend that yes, you are definetily an expert who knows what they’re talking about, haha

Same about chemistry...

That feeling when people don’t even seem to understand the 20 percent of yourself that you actually show

you have to admit yankees-Red sox would be a lot more interesting than Red Sox-a’s lol

Yeah, it will be. So log as they both lose the Series.