howdy!

Since our anniversary, I mean. I don't even know what to think. I'm so used to seeing her, being together... And just two days ago was supposed to celebrate that.

It's sad, I know. I can't fight this crushing feeling inside of me, but... It's almost refreshing, y'know? Demons are solitary creatures. We aren't supposed to be together... At least, not in similar relationships as humans. I don't think we're capable of that.

I'm sitting here in my living room. I just watered my plants. I guess I'm still processing the fact that it's over... Is it? Really? It didn't feel like two years during the time. It felt like an eternity... Maybe that was what happened. I've been living for thousands of years, yet these past couple of years seemed to go by far slower than the rest of my life so far.

I don't seem to recall what I told her. I feel sorry that it's done. I think... I'm a bit embarrassed that it's come to this. Not for either of our sakes, but for the situation as a whole. We're demons, why do we feel such complex emotions over such simple things?

I've been rambling. I miss her... although for some reason not in a way I have before. I miss her company and her insight. Those are things I loved about her, yet there was so much more before... Before...

Uhm. I-- I don't think I've followed up with her about it. I've been talking a lot with @wit-send and it's helped a lot. I just... I want her to live her best life. I know that she has so much to live for... I remember when I was a younger demon, unaware of my potential and frustrated at the chance of never achieving it. But... I made sacrifices. And sometimes those sacrifices came back, in the best way. I don't know what will come from this, but I wish @byne-nary every ounce of luck and joy and strength I can bestow.