A GE2015 Primer
HI GUYS I WROTE YOU A PRIMER FOR THE 2015 GE (GOOSE EGG) Jedward Milliraybans - Liberace - A free Jedward for every citizen! Also something about Trident gum idk Davide Cameroon - Constipated - Something about the Scottish? Everyone must become scottish? Also kitchen tax for when people don't use their kettles often enough. Rick Kleg - Labrador Democracy - Like the noble labrador the labrador democrats will roll over the second they're challenged in anything political. Nigella Farrier - UCHIPS - They want more chips for everyone British with plans to functionally ban anyone foreign from eating chips ever again. Also, not a huge supporter of EU (Extended Undulation) Natalie "Burn-it" Bennett - That really minging shade of green that looks like puke, you know the one i'm talking about right, party - The only lady allowed to do politics in the UK since she wrestled the ghost of Thatcher for the right to run for PM (Professional Madonna). She wants to make ghost wrestling mandatory for male politicians as well! Nicola Bigfish - SNP (Socialist Noddy Party) - The SNP want to reboot children's cartoons with a Socialist message! Also something about an independent Skegness? Leanne "Woody Harrelson" Wood - Plaid Cymru (Jacket in Welsh) - They want to bulldoze all of Wales and replace it with a giant welsh poppy field! (My personal voting choice because flowers are nice) I hope this helps you choose who to vote for but remember Mr Brand only decided voting was good after registration closed so only remember to vote after voting is closed k?
