Bicoastal Bunny Hop

-You need to deposit the money that you are making.

-Deposit enough money that you can cover your bills + 3X that. So if your bills are $2,000 deposit an additional $6,000 ($8,000 total) if you can per month. 

- Why? You need to establish an income and credit. Once you have a verified income you can apply for credit cards, and you can begin establishing your credit profile. This is what you need to buy a low interest vehicle and to own a home. Good Credit.

-Sign up for a DBA (Doing Business As) instead of a LLC. Make sure that when you sign up for your DBA you do it for something that you actually have skills in. Are you a good make-up artist? Do you write on the side? Make your DBA something like Central Writing Consulting…Transitions…something generic that is not your actual name. You don’t want to do Samantha Jones Consulting. 

-Do your taxes on a Schedule C (Sole Proprietorship) and claim every single dollar that you put into your bank account. Make sure that you have enough set aside to pay taxes when you do file. When you’re filing your taxes you can take off your travel and hotel costs, wardrobe, meals, gas, computer, cell phone bills, etc. 

-Get a safety deposit box at your bank and put your money in there. That way if you want to take time off you can go to the bank weekly or bi-weekly and get money from your safety deposit box and deposit so your income stream is not interrupted. Many businesses operate on cash. There’s no problem with being a cash business.

So recently I've come into the situation of successfully having both an SD and a vanilla without them knowing about each other. So I’m here to tell you how I’ve done it. 

1. Have a different number and app to keep your Vanilla, POTs and SD’s separate.

I have an iPhone so popular texting apps that I use are TextNow and Line2. You’re able to call, text and send pictures with each of them. I feel as though the quality is better with TextNow

2. Rename your SD/Vanilla as girls in your phone

If you trust your SD enough to have your real number, rename them in your phone as women. That way you can constantly text your SD or notifications come through and your Vanilla/SD won’t suspect a thing. 

3. Put your phone away and turn off your notification!

Each of your men deserves your time equally if you don’t want to get caught don’t give them a chance to look at your phone.  Turn off your notifications, NOT silent, OFF. As in, go into settings and disable all message notifications from coming through. Because even if you renamed your SD, we as human beings are often suspicious of who texted no matter who it is. What if either of your SD is handling your phone then *bing* a message comes through, you’re fucked. 

4. Constantly delete all messages from SD/Vanilla not only on your phone but ALL devices. 

My Vanilla uses my iPad to watch movies when he comes over so I make sure to not sync my iPhone messages to my iPad and delete all search history regarding anything sugar baby related. I also constantly delete conversations. 

5. Know each of their schedules. 

You’re going to find that this is the hardest and most stressful thing to accomplish when you have both in your life. 

For example, my Vanilla worked 7am-4 but he and I would go to lunch every day at 1145 so I would schedule my lunch dates around one. If I had to travel for a day, I would tell vanilla I had a client lunch (because I’m in sales) and would fly to Cali for a day trip. 

Overnight trips or stays can be a little more sketchy so I used to school, family, friends, and my medical stuff as excuses. 

My Vanilla goes to bed around 10 but my SD is a night owl like myself so I usually and secretly text my SD back while my Vanilla was sound asleep next to me. 

6. Make sure they’re in different social circles. 

This is REALLY important if they live in the same state. My vanilla was 38 and my SD was in his mid-40s. Luckily my SD was either out of state or lived 3 hours north of Phoenix. But If they were in the same metropolitan area, find out where. My vanilla never went father than East Valley while my SD’s usually resided in North Scottsdale so it made it easy. If they do reside in one city, pick different cities to hang out in, different restaurants and so forth. 

7. Ask your sugar sister or friends to take fake pictures and keep them if you need proof of excuses. 

@lilithsugarbabe totally knows I have asked for this a few times. ha. But if either of them wonders what you’re doing tonight, you have photo evidence for backup.

I’ll add if I can think of any more. 

Hope this helps,

1. Feeling as though you are reliving your childhood struggles.You find that you’re seeing issues you struggled with as a kid reappear in your adult life, and while on the surface this may seem like a matter of not having overcome them, it really means you are becoming conscious of why you think and feel, so you can change it.

2. Feeling “lost,” or directionless. Feeling lost is actually a sign you’re becoming more present in your life – you’re living less within the narratives and ideas that you premeditated, and more in the moment at hand. Until you’re used to this, it will feel as though you’re off track (you aren’t). 3. “Left brain” fogginess. When you’re utilizing the right hemisphere more often (you’re becoming more intuitive, you’re dealing with emotions, you’re creating) sometimes it can seem as though “left brain” functions leave you feeling fuzzy. Things like focusing, organizing, remembering small details suddenly become difficult.

4. Having random influxes of irrational anger or sadness that intensify until you can’t ignore them anymore. When emotions erupt it’s usually because they’re “coming up” to be recognized, and our job is to learn to stop grappling with them or resisting them, and to simply become fully conscious of them (after that, we control them, not the opposite way around). 5. Experiencing unpredictable and scattered sleeping patterns.You’ll need to sleep a lot more or a lot less, you’ll wake up in the middle of the night because you can’t stop thinking about something, you find yourself full of energy or completely exhausted, and with little in-between. 6. A life-changing event is taking place, or just has. You suddenly having to move, getting divorced, losing a job, having a car break down, etc.

7. Having an intense need to be alone. You’re suddenly disenchanted with the idea of spending every weekend out socializing, and other people’s problems are draining you more than they are intriguing you. This means you’re re-calibrating.

8. Intense, vivid dreaming that you almost always remember in detail. If dreams are how your subconscious mind communicates with you (or projects an image of your experience) then yours is definitely trying to say something. You’re having dreams at an intensity that you’ve never experienced before.

9. Downsizing your friend group; feeling more and more uncomfortable around negative people. The thing about negative people is that they rarely realize they are negative, and because you feel uncomfortable saying anything (and you’re even more uncomfortable keeping that in your life) you’re ghosting a bit on old friends.

10. Feeling like the dreams you had for your life are collapsing.What you do not realize at this moment is that it is making way for a reality better than you could have thought of, one that’s more aligned with who you are, not who you thought you would be.

11. Feeling as though your worst enemy are your thoughts.You’re beginning to realize that your thoughts do create your experience, and it’s often not until we’re pushed to our wit’s end that we even try to take control of them – and that’s when we realize that we were in control all along.

12. Feeling unsure of who you really are. Your past illusions about who you ‘should’ be are dissolving. You feel unsure because it is uncertain! You’re in the process of evolving, and we don’t become uncertain when we change for the worse (we become angry and closed off). In other words: if what you’re experiencing is insecurity or uncertainty, it’s usually going to lead to something better.

13. Recognizing how far you still have to go. When you realize this, it’s because you can also see where you’re headed, it means you finally know where and who you want to be.

14. “Knowing” things you don’t want to know. Such as what someone is really feeling, or that a relationship isn’t going to last, or that you won’t be at your job much longer. A lot of “irrational” anxiety comes from subconsciously sensing something, yet not taking it seriously because it isn’t logical.

15. Having a radically intense desire to speak up for yourself.Becoming angry with how much you’ve let yourself be walked on, or how much you’ve let other people’s voices get into your head is a sign that you’re finally ready to stop listening, and love yourself by respecting yourself first.

Normally I’d just send you a link to A-Pinch-Of-Sugar-Please’s blog, buuut since she’s a psychotic bitch, I’d be happy to help you out.

BEFORE MEETING:

Invent fake facts about yourself. Create an email address specifically for sugaring and only email them there. Get the Google Voice App and create a phone number to text/call men from distinct from your own. Use a fake name for the first few dates. List the next town over as your location on your profile and never tell them the actual college that you go to — especially if it’s small! If they ask what your parents do for a living, make it up or be vague. Once you’re super comfortable with them, you can tell them “Oh my name’s actually Katherine, not Katelynn” or even give them your real phone number if you want to as I often snapchat with NASA. But he’s the only one of my SDs who knows it as Google Voice works flawlessly and the others don’t really need it. 

On an opposite note, get as many details as possible about him from him or through background searching. If he tells you he’s the CEO of Apple, go to Apple’s website and confirm that. Also, invest in a Spokeo Account. Don’t be that annoying SB who begs girls to look men up for her. A lot of girls only buy the monthly plan which has a search quota so if these girls are kindly looking men up for you, that’s less POTs they can search for themselves. I think it’s like $49.95 per year and it’s well worth the money for the amount of information it gives you. You can reverse search his phone number, email, name, etc. to find out his address, income, family members — anything! I love to find their children’s names then look them up on Facebook to see how they live. Riding horses on vacation in Santorini as your cover photo? Okay, I’ll break bread with your dad tomorrow. Little Ashley’s making duck faces and wearing Abercrombie? Sorry, John, I’m actually no longer searching for an SD — best of luck!

Get as many photos as possible (5+) from a man you’re talking to so that you can reverse search them and find out company info, criminal history, or if he’s on any other sites to cross-check age, location, and other facts on the profile you first saw him on.

Before a first meet, Skype with him (for 5 to 30 minutes) to again make sure the photos he sent are of him and not some handsome model on JCrew’s website (guys on SD4M do this all the time — you’re not slick)! While you don’t want the skype date to replace the first date, it is a good way to keep and/or build up his interest and by revealing yourself in 3D and decreasing his chances of cancelling/flaking on you. New SDs in particular often get nervous by the whole process, especially if they’re married, so if he sees “Wow! She’s gorgeous/real/funny/witty/ and excited to see me Thursday!” he’ll be more at ease not only to go through with the meet, but to spend more chedda. Moreover, a Skype date can show you “Wow! He’s an asshole and begging me to slide the camera down to my boobs.” So you can know way before you spend hours on hair and make-up that the date will be a waste.

NON RED-FLAGS:

Need for discretion. If a man doesn’t tell you much about himself, his job, or his life, is using a GV number or a fake email, is going by a fake name, it does not matter at all. 9 times out of 10 I show up to POT dates knowing the results of their latest colonoscopy while they think I don’t even know their name. Focus on the steps above and let them think they’re slicker than you. Nigerian Prince never told me his real name. I knew it from 5 seconds after he emailed me, but I played along and feigned ignorance because I knew he was safe and rich and whatever other secrets he kept from me were irrelevant. After our first date, he revealed his real career, location, (still not his real name) etc. and I’d already known it all, but, like us, he was simply wary of giving too much info to the wrong person. My favorite is when a guy emails you from his real email using a fake name. “Inbox: New Email from Steve Jobs” “Hey it’s Mike!” lmfao Hey Mike! Whatever makes you comfortable enough to meet me for dinner and pay me. All this being said, sometimes a man’s “need for discretion” makes it fucking impossible to find out anything from him. In that case, I say “While I respect your need for discretion, it does not trump my need for safety and I would not feel comfortable meeting you for dinner without…(at least a skype date)(as many photos as I’ve sent you)(information about XYZ)(etc.).” If he refuses to accommodate, he’s blatantly disrespectful of your safety concerns and he’s not worth your time.

RED-FLAGS:

Asks for sexy photos. You really need to make sure your profile photos are serve their purpose and depict what you look like from head to toe. If you only include iPhoto face shots, that’s dandy but you need a full body shot of you in a cute outfit and I also always include a bikini shot. Nothing raunchy, just a fun day at the beach. If they’re asking for sexy photos and you already have full body shots on your profile, then kindly end it because they’re 12 year old horn dogs stuck in 45 year old bodies. But if your photos suck and they just want to confirm that you’re not Shrek, then you need to amp up your profile and oblige.

Asks your favorite position, kinkiest moment, sex history, what you’re into etc. There’s no space for immature, tacky, desperate rapid fire sex questions in the sugar bowl. At its core, sugaring is about companionship, chemistry, and fun times. If he needs a rap sheet of what you will and will not do in the bed room, then he should call up a pimp and ask for a very specific hooker. Even if you tell him this and he apologizes and stops, you still know that that’s his main incentive for joining this site so he’s probably looking for pay for play but has too much pride to admit to wanting a prostitute. If you’re fine with 4 hours a month with this man for however much you agree on, then boom! You just landed on easy money. But if you’re looking strictly for a sugar arrangement with outings, dinners, etc. then you need to move on. But be mindful that a lot of these men might be into BDSM, so if they ask specifically if you have interest in that then that’s not necessarily a red flag so much as them not wanting to waste either of your time. If you do say yes, however, and he presses you with sex questions, he’s equally guilty of the above offense.

Sleezy username/bad grammar. If “Hotsex69” messages you, you already know what he’s there for. He’s not a sugar daddy. He’s blatantly looking for pay for play.

Takes offense to your precautions. A lot of men will quickly realize that you both have iPhones and that your messages aren’t coming up blue. If he questions it, let him know straight up, “I’m using an app called Google Voice so that I don’t have to share my real phone number with strangers. Once I’m comfortable enough with you, I will give you my real number and you can reach me there.” 99% of guys completely get it and think “Damn, I wish I’d thought of that. She’s smart and safe and not full of shit! I can tell a lot of guys have wasted her time and I don’t want to be one, so I better step it up if I ever want the honor of using iMessage with this hottie!” The other 1% will cry like little bitches and be like “We’ve hit it off thus far! Don’t you trust me?!?” If he honestly thinks trust can be fostered after a few email messages, he’ll be equally pissy when you don’t have sex on the first date or when you reject his marriage proposal on the second date.

Insists on meeting for just drinks. 10:00pm drinks at the hotel bar so you can get drunk and then go upstairs? Um no. In a fun way, tell him you’d rather meet for dinner at this great restaurant you’re dying to try yada yada. I had this one guy come back at me with “How about we start with drinks and if we hit it off, then we can get dinner?” Lmfao why?! I literally see no incentive to that besides wanting to roofie me. If you’re that awkward and can’t be around a younger, more attractive woman without drinking then let’s drink at dinner. Have 10 glasses of wine with your food. I don’t care. But if I’m getting dolled up, I’m eating food. You are not skimping out on buying me dinner and you are not roofie-ing me and you are not getting me drunk so you can drag me back to your lair. I do too much damn cardio to drink my calories. Buy me dinner, you fuck.

MEETING:

Meet in a public place and STAY in a public place. Stroll in Central Park? Awesome! He wants to wander past the “DO NOT ENTER” sign and show you this ‘amazing view of the river’? Nope. Restaurants, coffee, theater — doesn’t matter as long as you’re surrounded by witnesses.

Have your own transportation to AND from a first meet. And from. And. From. AND FROM!!! Not “Oh I took a taxi here, but let me save $10 and go home with him — he was so funny and obviously legitimate!” Even if that’s true and he’s a sweetie and who he says he is, these men never need to know where you live. (Notice I did not say never should know. Doctor knows where I live and that’s fine. But he doesn’t need to.) If you ultimately decide you’re comfortable with having an SD over at your apartment, then that will come after several dates, not the first. Plus, the chase is half the fun for him. Don’t reveal all of yourself too quickly. For this same reason, never get into his car on the first date. Besides just safety reasons, you don’t want him to feel like (physically and mentally) that he has you 100%. Leave something to be desired.

Tell someone where you are and who you’re going with. If you’re close with a friend or relative who is non-judgmental, make sure they know where your date is and when you’ll be back. Otherwise, find a resource on here (I’ll gladly help you out)and text them (from your GV number) where you are going, when you get there, when you leave, and when you are home. Whenever I get in an SDs car for the first time, I always text my sugar friends his license number.

Some SBs insist on staying sober. I like to drink and I can handle it, so I do. But definitely don’t get drunk. It’s sloppy and unattractive but will also distract you from your goal of setting an allowance/arrangement in place and getting to know this man better. Plus, it will impair your judgment and prevent you from remembering the rest of these safety tips.

NON-RED FLAGS:

Doesn’t bring a gift or cash to the first date. Stop being so entitled. At this point, he owes you just as much as you owe him — nothing.

The car he drives. The $3000 allowance of a man who drives an Aston Martin is just as green as that of the man who drives a Jeep Grand Cherokee.

Offers you a ride there or back. He might genuinely want to save you the hassle of travelling. Most of these men are fathers and have that protective instinct. It’s 9pm, dark out, she’s waiting for a cab, this is nonsense, I’ll drive her. It’s not a redflag that he’s trying to be a gentleman, but either way, maintain your stance and politely decline.

Awkward behavior. Steve Jobs gave brilliant speeches, but outside of that, the dude was awkward as fuck. Nonetheless, he was richer than God. If a guy reaches to hold your hand on the first date and you don’t want him to, just say, “John, I’m having an absolute blast but I’m just not comfortable with that yet.” There’s no need to flip out and write a post saying OMG THIS GUY WAS SO CREEPY HE LIKE TRIED TO RAPE ME BLACKLIST!!!!! Doctor is the most awkward guy I’ve ever met in my entire life. Like him, many of these POTs were valedictorians of Harvard who went on to spend the next 8-12 years of their lives accumulating degrees in the dungeons of the Ivy Leagues. They lack sunlight and social skills. It’s okay. That doesn’t mean be wishy-washy when he tries to cop a feel. No. Be firm and put him in his place. If he makes you excessively uncomfortable, end the date and don’t pursue another. But if he stutters or can’t maintain eye contact or holds eye contact for too long or snorts or recites how beautiful you are or has a creepy smile, that doesn’t necessarily make him a potential serial killer.

RED FLAGS:

Talks about hotel time, private time, intimate time, ‘getting away’. There will be no sex on the first date. There will be no sex on the first date. There will be NO SEX on the first date. If he thinks dinner and a few hundred dollars gets you two “alone time” at the Ritz Carlton, then send him packing. Be blunt and embarrass that loser. Literally say, “John, I’ve had a blast getting to know you thus far but I have zero interest in trading sex for lobster and a gas money. I’m a lady who is looking for a gentleman with the means to provide for her and support her. If you’re only interested in sex in exchange for money, then you’re looking for an escort, not a sugar baby, and a second date would be a waste of both of our time.” Scare the shit out of him and make him realize just how crass and pathetic he’s being. You wear the pants. He’ll straighten up very quickly, or realize that you’re right and head down to the corner of main street instead.

Cringes at the bill or what you’re ordering. If he can’t afford lobster, desert, or how many drinks you’re getting, he can’t afford you. This is an absolute no brainer. Even if he says he can afford your $3000 monthly allowance, if it means he’s going without food, laundry, or anything else just to afford it for you now, there WILL come a later when he leaves you hanging. A real SD loves to treat you and doesn’t care if you buy the bar!

Switches stories. It’s one thing from initially stating he’s in finance to getting more specific about which sector or region he works in, but if yesterday he was CEO of Apple and today he’s a professor, he’s probably full of shit. Don’t be afraid to call him out on it. “I thought you said —-?” Learn the dynamics of body language and be able to discern when someone is lying or hiding key information from you. He could very well be the manager of the local K-Mart hoping to spend as many free dates with you as possible before you catch him in his lie.

Insists on anything. If he’s choosing your meal for you, forcing you to ride home with him, or backing you into a corner in any way, ditch him. If he’s that pushy on the first date, he’ll be even more pushy on the second or on the third because you let him win this time.

DATING:

Use a condom.

If you don’t use a condom, get tested regularly together and show each other the results.

RED FLAG 

Doesn’t meet allowance. If he owes you $500 per meet and misses a meet, he needs to bring it to the next meet, or else he’s breaking the terms of the arrangement. If it’s the end of the month and he shows up without allowance, he needs to send it to you/bring it to the next meet, or else he’s breaking the terms of the arrangement. Do not let him get comfortable and think of you as a friend or girlfriend. This is a SUGAR ARRANGEMENT. Do not let him treat you like something that you’re not and get sloppy with the reason why we’re here.

Wants to meet your family. Doctor still insists on introducing me to his sisters. Eck. Whatever. But he’s never meeting any of my family. I am not your girlfriend. This is not a relationship. We have no real future together. Read this haiku. It is the anthem of the bowl.

Insists on not using a condom, trying XYZ in bed that makes you uncomfortable. As always, don’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with and let them know. A real SD will put his desires aside for your safety and comcort. If he’s being pushy in bed or otherwise, he’s not there for your best interest.

NON-RED FLAG

Asks about your personal life. It’s not weird for a man to want to know what classes you’re taking or what’s new in your world. He’s not being creepy or nosy, he’s just curious about what makes you tick. He shouldn’t be prying into if you have a boyfriend or anything super specific, but don’t get weirded out if he asks a lot of things about you.

Asks for sexy pics or texts suggestively. After you’re intimate together, this really is fair game to ask. As always, you need not oblige, and if you do, play it safe and don’t include your face or use SnapChat. But just because he’s thinking of sex more doesn’t mean he’s still not invested in being a sugar daddy. If it makes you uncomfortable, say so. If he’s a true SD, he’ll respect your boundaries and get over it.

Is affectionate in public. Just because he likes to hold your hand and kiss you, doesn’t mean he’s thinking of you as a girlfriend and less of an SD and forgetting your arrangement. If PDA makes you uncomfortable and you need a bit more discretion, let him know. But just because he likes your soft skin doesn’t mean he’s going to propose and leave your arrangement in the dust. He might just like your soft skin.

Hates shopping. Not surprisingly, a lot of men hate shopping, especially for women or with women or in women’s stores. So just because he’s not buying you louboutins doesn’t mean he won’t give you the money to buy them yourself. 

IF YOU REMEMBER NOTHING ELSE, REMEMBER THIS:

Your token line is: “I’m not comfortable with that (yet).” Don’t be wishy-washy! If he wants to have sex and you lie and say “Oh uh I’m on my period” he’ll just ask again the next time. Instead, be honest and be firm saying you’re not comfortable with sex, riding in his car, his hand on your leg, meeting his mom, etc. etc. etc. Drop this line WHENEVER you need to say no. It sets the tone that you are the one who sets the boundaries of the relationship and that those boundaries will not be crossed. If a man ever persists against something you’ve blatantly stated makes you uncomfortable, then you know it’s time to end things.

We all know Marilyn Monroe, Angelina Jolie, and Halle Berry are some of the gems we have in movies now. But I’ve watched a lot of movies that helped me gain the sugar personas I had and I want to share some of those with you all.

Girlfriend experience

This is one of the more popular movies for sex workers and it is now a tv series. I personally liked it because I was ending a relationship while I was sugaring and I did feel some of the ways Christine felt.

Another thing I loved about this movie was the documentation and research this girl did on her clients. I use to have a notebook filled with all my POTs and SDs info, status, job info, likes and dislikes, turn ons, etc. My ex stole it a while ago but lucky for me I didn’t write down searchable info, even the names were in code.

I would recommend this as the first to watch before you binge watch sex work movies like I did.

Memoirs of a geisha

This is one of my personal favorites because I love the Asian culture when it comes to beauty. The grace, the discipline, and the routine of these woman is really what got me.

When I saw that one look method I was determined to get it to work for me. The Kama Sutra movie below also helped me achieve this. But nothing gets a man across the room faster than an enchanting look from a beautiful woman in their direction.

From this movie I was able to learn how to move more gracefully which is very attractive for men who like “exotic” women. So if you got hips sway them, if you have long legs be swift with your steps, and if your hand are flawless move them like a water bender on avatar (anime joke).

The Treacherous

This movie is very gory so if that’s not your thing don’t watch it. But it does show some intense training for courtesans (old world Asia times).

The seductiveness of these women turned me on so I knew the same methods would turn any man on too. My favorite seductive move is the removing of clothes shown in the beginning scenes where the man challenged the woman to a strip game.

Another scene that showed me a lot of gems was the actual training of the women and how they were to taught to please. I even got some old school hoe tips for my Vag in this movie.

Kama Sutra

Yes it is spelled right and yes it is about using Karma Sutra. If you want a movie example of how some Karma Sutra techniques work then look no further.

This movie showed me how equally important foreplay is for men as it is for us. It showed little snippets of how even feeding can be sensual for men. My favorite tip from the movie would have to be the eye movements of the women while they danced. Those eyes have gotten me compliments from many dance teachers because they could see sexiness in my eyes.

Just look at these eyes:

Etiquette of a mistress

In case you haven’t noticed by now I watch a lot of Asian movies. This one in particular is informative and funny so you’ll really enjoy watching it.

If you’re a sugar that deals with a lot of married men this movie is for you. It shows you how to be properly discrete with your time together and how to deal with the cons of a married man. The best part of this movie is it shows the perspective of a veteran and a newbie, so I know my vets will enjoy this if they or helping any newbies out there.

Wolf on wall street

This is of course on here because of the famous Naomi character that we love so much. Her sharp tongue is definitely needed when you are trying to pass through all the BS talk. But another thing to pay attention to is her physical presentation of herself. Her style with her looks was like devil in a red dress but with diamonds add.

Two can play that game

This one is mostly for my brown SBs who are close to their mid 20s.

In the 2000s this movie was like the black woman’s player guide. I’ve used many of these strategies to get men back on track to what I wanted. My little black dress is still in the closet waiting for the day my fiance acts up.

One thing from that movie I don’t do is flaunt another man because doing that in this world can severe ties real quick.

A lot of people focus on Shante in this movie but I also loved watching Conny too. Mainly because I love Gabrielle Union’s acting especially in Being Mary Jane.

Whoresglory

I didn’t learn much from this movie for my personal gain but I did learn a lot about sex work around the world. So if you’re just interested in a movie that shows you different kinds of sex workers watch this.

Breakfast at Tiffany

I love a good Audrey Hepburn movie because her white woman swag is just as awesome as Marilyn’s. She taught me how to be sweet and

youthful while also being mysterious and unavailable.

Being sweet and youthful is what kept my men feeling lucky to have me. But being mysterious and unavailable at times is what kept them on their toes and more willing do what was needed to “secure” me.

Show Girls

I’m starting to think I should’ve tried stripping because sexy dancing is one of my favorite things to do. Expressing with my body is like art to me but I was probably right not to strip, I would get addicted.

This movie however made me more glamorous and aggressive when it came to my sexy looks. I never got a chance to see real show girls in Vegas but I’m pretty sure I would be in awe by them. I’ve never been a glamorous person but after this movie I started adding a little shimmer and glitter to my style.

Chicago

Again with the dancing lol, I’m sorry ladies but these women, even with out the dancing were phenomenal. The He Made Me Do It song was an all time favorite for me.

But as far as lessons I started to see how competitive women could be when it comes to money and credibility/fame.

I learned on movies like this how to out smart them when it comes to whales.There have been many new girls who tried taking my main SD away from me but they couldn’t get to my relationship quality. Even when girls did get some dates from other SDs of mine they didn’t last long. So please remember ladies quality and good relationships always wins when it comes to real SDs.

Josephine Baker Biography

My girl next door persona has always got me the most money. So when I saw this biography I started mastering it. Her happy demeanor and tiny voice was so close to mine it wasn’t hard to practice.

What made me the happiest, was that even though she was sweet, innocent, and goofy she was also sensual. She knew how to express her sexuality without taking away from her innocence.

The end of the movie was sad and showed a lot of her flaws but she was still iconic.

Confessions of a Brazilian Call Girl

I can’t remember if this is based on a true story are not but it’s amazing. Especially with the online social platforms we have now, this movie has been very useful. This woman on here became a high class call girl based on online status alone.

She was also another person I looked to for glam sexuality and showed many women that even average women can dominate the sex world. There were bad parts like her cockiness and drug use but if she would’ve stayed in her grind she would’ve still been raking in millions. One thing this movie can show you (on the bad side) is that you should never try to “Keep up with the Jones” even in the sex world because it’s never greener on the other side.

Call Me: The Rise and fall of Hiede Fliess

If you don’t know Hiede Fliess, look her up now. She’s the greatest when it comes to call girls. The tactics she used to get where she was is amazing. She really knew how to keep connections with her clients and how to get other girls money.

I don’t know what she does now but I do respect the contributions she’s made to the sex work industry. If you’re in LA or Hollywood you should really watch this movie.

Some notable tv women I watch

Joseline Hernandez

She’s so unapologetic about who she is and will get money by any means necessary. Her and Cardi B are like alter egos I wish I had sometimes.

Cardi B

She is one of the realest woman I’ve seen on TV and she used what she had to get her fame. Now that she got it she is doing here to the max and I’m happy for her.

Nene Lakes

I can see myself being like Nene when I get older and wealthier. She is a star in many forms and doesn’t let these women or her man interfere with her money. She went from housewife to breadwinner even outside of the show.

Whitley Gilbert

I get all my bougie ways from Ms. Whitley lol. Really she was a good representation of a high class but down to earth black woman for me. She started out a little too much for me but after some seasons she grew on me. I’m always a sucker for tiny voiced women because mines is tiny too (Not as annoying as hers).

Tasha Patrick

Now I’m going to be honest I just started watching power but I love this women’s attitude. She’s sexy, ride or die, and also strategically vengeful. I might update this after I finish the show but for now that’s all I have to say.

Phaedra Parks

This woman beats me in being bougie and extra. I’ve never seen anyone who goes all out like she does. When I was in college I always wanted to be a like southern belle with curves so when this show came on I was tuned in. If you ever wanted to see an example of a curvy southern belle that can still get a little ghetto, Here she is.

This list is just a few of the many women I’ve watched to perfect my personas.

Now, when I switch my persona it’s not to completely change who I am but helps me adapt to different environments.

For example: If my SD likes to watch football games from his box then I’m not going to go into my prim and proper mode, I’m going to bring out girl next door me.

Depending on what your daddy likes you’re going to be put in different types of atmosphere and if you’re black than your going to need to adapt. The way to more opportunities is by building your credibility which is usually based on how much people like you. You re like an undercover celebrity lol.

Now if you don’t want to change that’s fine but that’s what’s work for me.

I change up like a Johnny Depp Movie role

Hope this all was helpful to you ladies.

Normally I’d just send you a link to A-Pinch-Of-Sugar-Please’s blog, buuut since she’s a psychotic bitch, I’d be happy to help you out.

BEFORE MEETING:

Invent fake facts about yourself. Create an email address specifically for sugaring and only email them there. Get the Google Voice App and create a phone number to text/call men from distinct from your own. Use a fake name for the first few dates. List the next town over as your location on your profile and never tell them the actual college that you go to — especially if it’s small! If they ask what your parents do for a living, make it up or be vague. Once you’re super comfortable with them, you can tell them “Oh my name’s actually Katherine, not Katelynn” or even give them your real phone number if you want to as I often snapchat with NASA. But he’s the only one of my SDs who knows it as Google Voice works flawlessly and the others don’t really need it. 

On an opposite note, get as many details as possible about him from him or through background searching. If he tells you he’s the CEO of Apple, go to Apple’s website and confirm that. Also, invest in a Spokeo Account. Don’t be that annoying SB who begs girls to look men up for her. A lot of girls only buy the monthly plan which has a search quota so if these girls are kindly looking men up for you, that’s less POTs they can search for themselves. I think it’s like $49.95 per year and it’s well worth the money for the amount of information it gives you. You can reverse search his phone number, email, name, etc. to find out his address, income, family members — anything! I love to find their children’s names then look them up on Facebook to see how they live. Riding horses on vacation in Santorini as your cover photo? Okay, I’ll break bread with your dad tomorrow. Little Ashley’s making duck faces and wearing Abercrombie? Sorry, John, I’m actually no longer searching for an SD — best of luck!

Get as many photos as possible (5+) from a man you’re talking to so that you can reverse search them and find out company info, criminal history, or if he’s on any other sites to cross-check age, location, and other facts on the profile you first saw him on.

Before a first meet, Skype with him (for 5 to 30 minutes) to again make sure the photos he sent are of him and not some handsome model on JCrew’s website (guys on SD4M do this all the time — you’re not slick)! While you don’t want the skype date to replace the first date, it is a good way to keep and/or build up his interest and by revealing yourself in 3D and decreasing his chances of cancelling/flaking on you. New SDs in particular often get nervous by the whole process, especially if they’re married, so if he sees “Wow! She’s gorgeous/real/funny/witty/ and excited to see me Thursday!” he’ll be more at ease not only to go through with the meet, but to spend more chedda. Moreover, a Skype date can show you “Wow! He’s an asshole and begging me to slide the camera down to my boobs.” So you can know way before you spend hours on hair and make-up that the date will be a waste.

NON RED-FLAGS:

Need for discretion. If a man doesn’t tell you much about himself, his job, or his life, is using a GV number or a fake email, is going by a fake name, it does not matter at all. 9 times out of 10 I show up to POT dates knowing the results of their latest colonoscopy while they think I don’t even know their name. Focus on the steps above and let them think they’re slicker than you. Nigerian Prince never told me his real name. I knew it from 5 seconds after he emailed me, but I played along and feigned ignorance because I knew he was safe and rich and whatever other secrets he kept from me were irrelevant. After our first date, he revealed his real career, location, (still not his real name) etc. and I’d already known it all, but, like us, he was simply wary of giving too much info to the wrong person. My favorite is when a guy emails you from his real email using a fake name. “Inbox: New Email from Steve Jobs” “Hey it’s Mike!” lmfao Hey Mike! Whatever makes you comfortable enough to meet me for dinner and pay me. All this being said, sometimes a man’s “need for discretion” makes it fucking impossible to find out anything from him. In that case, I say “While I respect your need for discretion, it does not trump my need for safety and I would not feel comfortable meeting you for dinner without…(at least a skype date)(as many photos as I’ve sent you)(information about XYZ)(etc.).” If he refuses to accommodate, he’s blatantly disrespectful of your safety concerns and he’s not worth your time.

RED-FLAGS:

Asks for sexy photos. You really need to make sure your profile photos are serve their purpose and depict what you look like from head to toe. If you only include iPhoto face shots, that’s dandy but you need a full body shot of you in a cute outfit and I also always include a bikini shot. Nothing raunchy, just a fun day at the beach. If they’re asking for sexy photos and you already have full body shots on your profile, then kindly end it because they’re 12 year old horn dogs stuck in 45 year old bodies. But if your photos suck and they just want to confirm that you’re not Shrek, then you need to amp up your profile and oblige.

Asks your favorite position, kinkiest moment, sex history, what you’re into etc. There’s no space for immature, tacky, desperate rapid fire sex questions in the sugar bowl. At its core, sugaring is about companionship, chemistry, and fun times. If he needs a rap sheet of what you will and will not do in the bed room, then he should call up a pimp and ask for a very specific hooker. Even if you tell him this and he apologizes and stops, you still know that that’s his main incentive for joining this site so he’s probably looking for pay for play but has too much pride to admit to wanting a prostitute. If you’re fine with 4 hours a month with this man for however much you agree on, then boom! You just landed on easy money. But if you’re looking strictly for a sugar arrangement with outings, dinners, etc. then you need to move on. But be mindful that a lot of these men might be into BDSM, so if they ask specifically if you have interest in that then that’s not necessarily a red flag so much as them not wanting to waste either of your time. If you do say yes, however, and he presses you with sex questions, he’s equally guilty of the above offense.

Sleezy username/bad grammar. If “Hotsex69” messages you, you already know what he’s there for. He’s not a sugar daddy. He’s blatantly looking for pay for play.

Takes offense to your precautions. A lot of men will quickly realize that you both have iPhones and that your messages aren’t coming up blue. If he questions it, let him know straight up, “I’m using an app called Google Voice so that I don’t have to share my real phone number with strangers. Once I’m comfortable enough with you, I will give you my real number and you can reach me there.” 99% of guys completely get it and think “Damn, I wish I’d thought of that. She’s smart and safe and not full of shit! I can tell a lot of guys have wasted her time and I don’t want to be one, so I better step it up if I ever want the honor of using iMessage with this hottie!” The other 1% will cry like little bitches and be like “We’ve hit it off thus far! Don’t you trust me?!?” If he honestly thinks trust can be fostered after a few email messages, he’ll be equally pissy when you don’t have sex on the first date or when you reject his marriage proposal on the second date.

Insists on meeting for just drinks. 10:00pm drinks at the hotel bar so you can get drunk and then go upstairs? Um no. In a fun way, tell him you’d rather meet for dinner at this great restaurant you’re dying to try yada yada. I had this one guy come back at me with “How about we start with drinks and if we hit it off, then we can get dinner?” Lmfao why?! I literally see no incentive to that besides wanting to roofie me. If you’re that awkward and can’t be around a younger, more attractive woman without drinking then let’s drink at dinner. Have 10 glasses of wine with your food. I don’t care. But if I’m getting dolled up, I’m eating food. You are not skimping out on buying me dinner and you are not roofie-ing me and you are not getting me drunk so you can drag me back to your lair. I do too much damn cardio to drink my calories. Buy me dinner, you fuck.

MEETING:

Meet in a public place and STAY in a public place. Stroll in Central Park? Awesome! He wants to wander past the “DO NOT ENTER” sign and show you this ‘amazing view of the river’? Nope. Restaurants, coffee, theater — doesn’t matter as long as you’re surrounded by witnesses.

Have your own transportation to AND from a first meet. And from. And. From. AND FROM!!! Not “Oh I took a taxi here, but let me save $10 and go home with him — he was so funny and obviously legitimate!” Even if that’s true and he’s a sweetie and who he says he is, these men never need to know where you live. (Notice I did not say never should know. Doctor knows where I live and that’s fine. But he doesn’t need to.) If you ultimately decide you’re comfortable with having an SD over at your apartment, then that will come after several dates, not the first. Plus, the chase is half the fun for him. Don’t reveal all of yourself too quickly. For this same reason, never get into his car on the first date. Besides just safety reasons, you don’t want him to feel like (physically and mentally) that he has you 100%. Leave something to be desired.

Tell someone where you are and who you’re going with. If you’re close with a friend or relative who is non-judgmental, make sure they know where your date is and when you’ll be back. Otherwise, find a resource on here (I’ll gladly help you out)and text them (from your GV number) where you are going, when you get there, when you leave, and when you are home. Whenever I get in an SDs car for the first time, I always text my sugar friends his license number.

Some SBs insist on staying sober. I like to drink and I can handle it, so I do. But definitely don’t get drunk. It’s sloppy and unattractive but will also distract you from your goal of setting an allowance/arrangement in place and getting to know this man better. Plus, it will impair your judgment and prevent you from remembering the rest of these safety tips.

NON-RED FLAGS:

Doesn’t bring a gift or cash to the first date. Stop being so entitled. At this point, he owes you just as much as you owe him — nothing.

The car he drives. The $3000 allowance of a man who drives an Aston Martin is just as green as that of the man who drives a Jeep Grand Cherokee.

Offers you a ride there or back. He might genuinely want to save you the hassle of travelling. Most of these men are fathers and have that protective instinct. It’s 9pm, dark out, she’s waiting for a cab, this is nonsense, I’ll drive her. It’s not a redflag that he’s trying to be a gentleman, but either way, maintain your stance and politely decline.

Awkward behavior. Steve Jobs gave brilliant speeches, but outside of that, the dude was awkward as fuck. Nonetheless, he was richer than God. If a guy reaches to hold your hand on the first date and you don’t want him to, just say, “John, I’m having an absolute blast but I’m just not comfortable with that yet.” There’s no need to flip out and write a post saying OMG THIS GUY WAS SO CREEPY HE LIKE TRIED TO RAPE ME BLACKLIST!!!!! Doctor is the most awkward guy I’ve ever met in my entire life. Like him, many of these POTs were valedictorians of Harvard who went on to spend the next 8-12 years of their lives accumulating degrees in the dungeons of the Ivy Leagues. They lack sunlight and social skills. It’s okay. That doesn’t mean be wishy-washy when he tries to cop a feel. No. Be firm and put him in his place. If he makes you excessively uncomfortable, end the date and don’t pursue another. But if he stutters or can’t maintain eye contact or holds eye contact for too long or snorts or recites how beautiful you are or has a creepy smile, that doesn’t necessarily make him a potential serial killer.

RED FLAGS:

Talks about hotel time, private time, intimate time, ‘getting away’. There will be no sex on the first date. There will be no sex on the first date. There will be NO SEX on the first date. If he thinks dinner and a few hundred dollars gets you two “alone time” at the Ritz Carlton, then send him packing. Be blunt and embarrass that loser. Literally say, “John, I’ve had a blast getting to know you thus far but I have zero interest in trading sex for lobster and a gas money. I’m a lady who is looking for a gentleman with the means to provide for her and support her. If you’re only interested in sex in exchange for money, then you’re looking for an escort, not a sugar baby, and a second date would be a waste of both of our time.” Scare the shit out of him and make him realize just how crass and pathetic he’s being. You wear the pants. He’ll straighten up very quickly, or realize that you’re right and head down to the corner of main street instead.

Cringes at the bill or what you’re ordering. If he can’t afford lobster, desert, or how many drinks you’re getting, he can’t afford you. This is an absolute no brainer. Even if he says he can afford your $3000 monthly allowance, if it means he’s going without food, laundry, or anything else just to afford it for you now, there WILL come a later when he leaves you hanging. A real SD loves to treat you and doesn’t care if you buy the bar!

Switches stories. It’s one thing from initially stating he’s in finance to getting more specific about which sector or region he works in, but if yesterday he was CEO of Apple and today he’s a professor, he’s probably full of shit. Don’t be afraid to call him out on it. “I thought you said —-?” Learn the dynamics of body language and be able to discern when someone is lying or hiding key information from you. He could very well be the manager of the local K-Mart hoping to spend as many free dates with you as possible before you catch him in his lie.

Insists on anything. If he’s choosing your meal for you, forcing you to ride home with him, or backing you into a corner in any way, ditch him. If he’s that pushy on the first date, he’ll be even more pushy on the second or on the third because you let him win this time.

DATING:

Use a condom.

If you don’t use a condom, get tested regularly together and show each other the results.

RED FLAG 

Doesn’t meet allowance. If he owes you $500 per meet and misses a meet, he needs to bring it to the next meet, or else he’s breaking the terms of the arrangement. If it’s the end of the month and he shows up without allowance, he needs to send it to you/bring it to the next meet, or else he’s breaking the terms of the arrangement. Do not let him get comfortable and think of you as a friend or girlfriend. This is a SUGAR ARRANGEMENT. Do not let him treat you like something that you’re not and get sloppy with the reason why we’re here.

Wants to meet your family. Doctor still insists on introducing me to his sisters. Eck. Whatever. But he’s never meeting any of my family. I am not your girlfriend. This is not a relationship. We have no real future together. Read this haiku. It is the anthem of the bowl.

Insists on not using a condom, trying XYZ in bed that makes you uncomfortable. As always, don’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with and let them know. A real SD will put his desires aside for your safety and comcort. If he’s being pushy in bed or otherwise, he’s not there for your best interest.

NON-RED FLAG

Asks about your personal life. It’s not weird for a man to want to know what classes you’re taking or what’s new in your world. He’s not being creepy or nosy, he’s just curious about what makes you tick. He shouldn’t be prying into if you have a boyfriend or anything super specific, but don’t get weirded out if he asks a lot of things about you.

Asks for sexy pics or texts suggestively. After you’re intimate together, this really is fair game to ask. As always, you need not oblige, and if you do, play it safe and don’t include your face or use SnapChat. But just because he’s thinking of sex more doesn’t mean he’s still not invested in being a sugar daddy. If it makes you uncomfortable, say so. If he’s a true SD, he’ll respect your boundaries and get over it.

Is affectionate in public. Just because he likes to hold your hand and kiss you, doesn’t mean he’s thinking of you as a girlfriend and less of an SD and forgetting your arrangement. If PDA makes you uncomfortable and you need a bit more discretion, let him know. But just because he likes your soft skin doesn’t mean he’s going to propose and leave your arrangement in the dust. He might just like your soft skin.

Hates shopping. Not surprisingly, a lot of men hate shopping, especially for women or with women or in women’s stores. So just because he’s not buying you louboutins doesn’t mean he won’t give you the money to buy them yourself. 

IF YOU REMEMBER NOTHING ELSE, REMEMBER THIS:

Your token line is: “I’m not comfortable with that (yet).” Don’t be wishy-washy! If he wants to have sex and you lie and say “Oh uh I’m on my period” he’ll just ask again the next time. Instead, be honest and be firm saying you’re not comfortable with sex, riding in his car, his hand on your leg, meeting his mom, etc. etc. etc. Drop this line WHENEVER you need to say no. It sets the tone that you are the one who sets the boundaries of the relationship and that those boundaries will not be crossed. If a man ever persists against something you’ve blatantly stated makes you uncomfortable, then you know it’s time to end things.

This is a guide for expected monthly allowance based in SD income. These are just estimates - depending on your location it can be higher or lower. I used a reference of NYC since it has among the highest taxes in the country. I also stopped at $250k since that is the top 0.01 for salary as well.

For income I used after tax earnings (source: paycheckcity) with one deduction for single and three deductions (wife, 2 children) for married. My graphs take into account the following:

1. Male - Single, no kids or Married with wife and 2 kids.

2. More accurate reflection of after-tax earnings

3. Minimum cost of living in NYC (transportation, food, medical, rent, etc.) [Source: MIT cost of living calculator]

4. 15% (single) and 30% (married) monthly salary deduction in the event he lives in a better area, drives luxury vehicle, sends his kids to private school, emergencies, etc.

None of these posts are mine and for all I know there’s 300 master lists filled with the same links. I also am no professional in this job field so if you have questions contact the people attached to their own links. But this what I’ve gathered up and feel free to add your own links/experiences.

Filer Method for POTs

Shopping With Your SD

What To If You’re Worried You Won’t Get Paid On Time

Uping Bedroom Game

How To Be a Successful SB

(not SB specific) Sales Techniques

Reasons To Become a Sugar Baby

Positive Reminders

Tips for POTs

Occupational Hazards

Basics For Being Around a POT/SD

Marketing

A Reminder For SB Newcomers

Taking Care of Yourself

10 Golden Rules

Apps to Use While Sugaring

7 Top Mistakes Made in Online Profiles

Banking Tips

10 Mistakes That Can Be Made

Apps Like Paypal That Don’t Require Your Actual Name

Advice From a Sugar Daddy

Natural Acne Care

Perks of Sugaring

Possible Long-term Goals

Financial Advice

Types of Sugar Daddies

Advice from a Sugar Baby

Short FAQ on Sugaring

New SB Tip

Get the Money First

Searching for a SD

Tips for Dealing With POTs

Cheap Self-Care

Sugar Baby Allowance

Communication with Sugar Daddies

Good Sites to Find POTs

Upper Class Culture ( 1 ) ( 2 )

Plans for SBs

Negotiation Tactic

Allowance Tips

6 Common Mistakes

Allowance and Bank Laws

Steps to Become a Sugar Baby

Tips for Your First Date with Your POT

Sugar Baby Reminder

Appropriate Responses to Give to SDs

Budgeting Tips

Money Making Tips

*** Warning: Only try this with the sugardaddies you actually like and feel some attachment too. And definitely trust ***

Please heed the warning or you will crash and burn if you attempt the following.

PREPARE YOUR MEETING PLACE: If you’re regularly meeting at a hotel room, get daddy to get you a prepaid card so that you can go ahead and rent the room ahead of your visit. This will save him the trouble of doing it and allow you a chance to control your interaction. A lot of escorts do this for that very same reason: control.  For him, the businessman or exec who’s dealing with all kinds of shit this takes some pressure off him. What you have to understand about a successful man is that he’s always under pressure. He’s getting beat to shit daily from work, life, and home and he’s probably middle-aged meaning half of daddy’s life is already gone. Daunting. You need to be the calming voice in his life. When he gets there, of course be in your best lingerie, smelling good, etc, with the sheets pulled back on the bed. Or, answer the door naked, in a pair of red bottoms, etc. Or, ask to keep one of his ties for a souvenir on a previous date and when your next visit at the room arrived, have it on and nothing else.

If you host your visits at your residence, then ask daddy what kind of snack he likes. Fruit? Have some strawberries or grapes waiting for him when he comes over. He likes wine, etc.,? Have a glass poured. You can enjoy glass too. Its ok. If you have a problem drinking with daddy, refer to my warning above. :)

RELAX HIM: Give daddy a massage. Not an hour, just 10 minutes to break him down. This is a good time to ask for shit. If he has dry skin, bring some oil in your purse. First rub his back, making sure you’re getting in between those shoulder blades, etc. Skip the legs, lower torso etc. Unnecessary. He’s tense from meetings and conference calls all day. Turn him over and rub him briefly on his chest before you work your way down to his love zone. Rub his dick and don’t forget the boys. When he’s nice hard, start fellatio (if you do fellatio).  If he doesn’t want a massage or doesn’t have time that’s cool. You need to put it out there anyway. 

Time taken: 7 - 10 minutes

LAY YOUR HEAD ON HIS CHEST: After sex, cuddle up next to him and lay your head on his chest. If he has little or no hair this will be easy. If he’s a hairy bastard you might find another place to lay your head but the goal is to cuddle him. Use the hair to your advantage and play with it as you lie there. Twist it in your fingers or some shit. Make him feel like he just pleased you in every way possible. He probably didn’t, but it’s all about the fantasy. This is easy to do if you like him. Refer to my warning above! Say something meaningful like, “That was good daddy.”  If you have psychological hang-ups about calling him daddy then say “That was good baby..”  or “Mmmm I needed that.” All too often chicks are just lying there side by side with him in her own world. You can remain in your own world just do it cuddling him. This is also a good habit to have when you get married. :) 

Time taken: Not applicable

CLEAN HIM UP: Grab a warm damp warm towel, and remove the condom. Wipe up his penis and go put the condom in the toilet. If no condom was used, you can still clean him up if his penis is about stick to his leg. If  he’s caught off your guard, or ask what you’re doing, tell him “I’m just taking care of you daddy…” I got this one from several Escorts I’ve seen over the years. Trust me. You want some brownie points? Try it a few times. You can even be cute about it and say, “Gosh, you had a lot in there.” Or my FAVORITE “….I see you’ve been saving up for me. You had a lot!” The latter is perfect for you babies seeing daddy once a week. When you’re done cleaning him up, lay back on him. This is also another good time to ask for shit. 

Time taken: 30 - 45 seconds

TASTE IT: Now I might lose a few of you here but it’s my duty to put it out there anyway.  While you cleaning him up, put a forefinger in your mouth and say, “Mmm you taste good.” He might pass the hell out. If you’re good at this he won’t know you don’t actually have some cum on your finger. Hopefully, some of you catch what I mean on the latter. :) Or, if you swallow anyway then nothing is wrong with a little protein on your finger and tasting it.

Time taken:  2 seconds

PUT HIS SHIRT ON: If you’re going to be in the hotel room awhile, try this one out. This will kill him. If he wears good smelling cologne capitalize on it. With the shirt on, pull the collar up to your nose and say, “Mmm I love your smell daddy…” You won’t be lying if he wears good cologne. Chances are you already noticed his cologne but you were too much of a bitch to say you smell good. This is the sexiest shit EVER though. Nothing cuter than your 110, 120, 150 lbs ass in his big ass shirt. One of my previous sugarbabies used to do this. Drove me crazy.

Oh and congratulations!!!! Now he’s going to be thinking about you the rest of the day. You’ve inadvertently left your perfume on his shirt. Now he’s gonna be smelling your pretty little ass the rest of the day. Just don’t leave any lipstick!

Take a selfie with the shirt on. Send it to him days later in between your visits.

Time taken: 10 seconds to put on his shirt. Time elapsed before he wants to take it back off and fuck again: 60 seconds. Likelihood of you getting that Celine purse: High.

HELP HIM GET DRESSED: This one is especially important for the busy executive, businessman or man that works in a professional setting and he’s on his lunch break, or on his way home to his vanilla life. No, don’t help him pull his trousers up. But you can help with the belt as you kiss him on the chest. I’m saying as he buttons his shirt, go help him. Help him button the ones on his sleeves as well. And most important help put his tie back on and straighten it and his collar afterwards. Then finish it with a kiss. If you don’t get a chance to do all that, then collect his shoes and socks and bring them to him. Don’t’ try and put those on - that’s just corny. You’ll love his reaction I promise.

Time taken: 30 – 45 seconds

CUDDLE HIM: Recently, I learned something about myself. I read somewhere that one of the reasons why I cheat is because I as a man want to be cuddled and held. I thought this was bullshit but it’s quite true.  I know this is contrary to all the SD advice you’ve been getting but take it from a long standing member of the sugar community its true. I’ll explain this one better by giving a real life example. Now when I would first come over, Nebraska and I would sit on her bed and talk and she’d find some way to wrap her legs around and hug me like I was her long lost boyfriend. I was going through some things and it felt good for somebody in this world to seemingly take an interest in my plight. Then, she’d just sit there and stare at me like I was a big piece of steak. Staring at my mouth. When I’d talk too long she’d start taking off my clothes. While she was getting me undressed, she was always say one of these 3 things:  “ I know you didn’t’ come here to do all that talking…” or “You just gonna talk?” or my favorite “Or we gonna fuck or not daddy?” One day, after sex I was sitting on the bed and she climbed on the bed, sat down behind me so that I was in between her legs. As I was talking so she kissed me gingerly on my back and also laid her head on my back as we talked.  This shit made me feel like a king. When Nebraska and I ended our arrangement she said, “Well I was actually genuinely interested in you…” This is why I mentioned only try these techniques when you have some type of genuine attraction to daddy. Its easier to do and you won’t be faking which will speak volumes.

Time taken: none. You were going to be doing all this talking anyway, just on one side of the bed or side by side as you sat on the bed. The difference here is you’re cuddling him while you do it.  

Now, I’m about to drop half of you right here.

LET HIM CUM TWICE: You’re laying there in his arms, listening to his bullshit. Reach down and play with his love while he’s talking. After a moment ask, “You got another round in you daddy?” Regardless of his answer, go down and start blowing him again. It should be cleaned if you followed my advice earlier – clean him up. Anyway, if he said no, he’ll appreciate your dedication and let you try and revive him before he stops you. If he says yes, then its self explanatory.  Relax though. Your middle-aged daddy most likely won’t have a second round in him anyway. This METHOD is extremely effective with the sugarbabies that only see their daddy once a week.  But, for other arrangements its works quite well too.  

A lot of chicks are jumping up, cleaning up and rushing out the door, saying how you have so much to do today. Nothing kills a relationship like feeling like you’re being used (even though you actually are!). But remember, you want him around awhile. This is definitely a powerful tool to make that happen. Sends a clear signal that you’re all about pleasing him. (I hope the latter doesn’t get me in trouble). Trust me. An extra several minutes is cheap time to spend if you knew you’d be getting another 4 - 6 months out of daddy.

Time taken: 5 – 7 minutes

FINISHING TOUCHES: Put the finishing touches on it. When you’ve helped him finish getting dressed, and you know he’s on his way back to work or back to business, when he heads out the door say something encouraging like, “Go get’em baby.“ Or if he told you about some crap going on at work, take the opp to regurgitate it. “Fuck Bob. He’s an asshole. You should have got the promotion.” blah blah. You get the point. The latter can be applied even as you both do a last kiss before you head out the door. Again, it’s all about the finishing touches.

Time taken: 2 seconds

I know some of you are saying, “I ain’t doing all that shit.” But remember you are selling a fantasy. You’re giving the most precious part of your body away. Only to have your average sugardaddy relationship end in 2 to 3 months? All because he’s had his fill of your kitty. I assure you incorporating these techniques into your visits with daddy will go a long way and add months onto your relationship. This will help keep him coming back for more and more. Another way to put it, why not hook daddy for several months or even a few years and milk him dry (no pun intended) with just a few extra things?

I put the time on the end of these sections to show how long these little techniques actually take. Like I always say just a little extra goes a LONG way. These simple yet EXTREMELY effective techniques WILL prolong your sugar relationship. So why not incorporate them into your experience? I GUARANTEE daddy will respond to this stuff. I know because I’ve had it all done to me before and it blew me away then and it blows me away now as I type!

Damn I’m horny now. And my visit with sugarbaby isn’t for a few days.

Found this on Thought Catalog by an anonymous author! 

1. Commit to an identity online and IRL.

Are you a southern belle? A hardworking small town girl eager to leave her roots behind? A collegiate with big time professional aspirations? The girl next door? A vixen who happens to prefer older men? A fun-loving young woman eager to travel and see the world? Zero in on how you want to portray yourself and curate your online profile accordingly, making sure to highlight your most desirable traits. The idea isn’t to play a role, but to be consistent and commit to an identity that’s a genuine expression of your true persona—to be the best version of your authentic self. For example, if you deem yourself a girl-next door, don’t show up to meet a prospective sugar daddy in five-inch heels and a dress with a plunging neckline. Wear something modest. You should always feel comfortable, but there’s value in committing to an identity badge as long as it mirrors who you actually are on some level. Believe me, they’ll be able to sniff out the phonies.

2. Do the work, and be patient.

The initial phase of sugar dating is a lot like regular dating in that you have to find someone you genuinely like and want to spend time with. But a sugar daddy also has to be someone who can meet your specific needs. That extra layer of criteria (connection + the ability to meet your needs) requires yet more time and energy than dating the “normal” way, but it’s usually worth it. Sift through profiles, communicate with as many potential candidates as possible, and assume you’ll have to go on a lot of first dates before you meet the right guy.

3. Be straightforward.

A lot of successful men choose sugar dating because they value efficiency and they don’t want to waste their time, so sugar babies should be straightforward about their needs and expectations. They should also feel free to ask as many questions as necessary to figure out whether a specific sugar daddy’s desired approach, intentions, and expectations match theirs. Early on, a sugar baby should address how often she’s available and/or willing to meet, and exactly what she expects in terms of gifts, shopping sprees, allowance, help with tuition, credit card payments, vacations, housing, mentorship, etc. She should also be honest about why she’s choosing the sugar baby lifestyle. Sugar daddies like to know exactly how they’re helping out so they can feel good about their contribution to a young woman’s life.

4. Outline a specific, mutually beneficial agreement.

If a sugar baby and sugar daddy click and their needs are aligned, the next step is to solidify the exact terms of the relationship. The more specific the agreement, the easier it will be for both parties to know exactly what their obligations are. Consider the following:

What time of day will you meet up, and for how many hours? Where exactly will you meet (hotel, sugar baby’s place, sugar daddy’s home)? What will a typical date entail (theater, lunch, travel, long walks, cocktail parties, movies)? Will you hang out alone, or will you be seen in public together? When will you receive payment/gifts/etc.? How long do you anticipate the relationship will last? What do each of you consider a dealbreaker (failure to make timely payments, a last minute cancellation, the discovery that you’re not exclusively dating each other, or a request deemed too greedy)?

5. Never get too comfortable.

Months into dating the “normal” way, you might start to get comfortable and put less effort into how you dress and/or behave, but a sugar baby can never slack off if she wants the relationship to last. Be your best-looking, most pleasant self at all times. The goal is to be a top-notch companion. That doesn’t mean you can’t express that you’ve had a bad day, but it does mean that you can’t meet your sugar daddy wearing your favorite sweats (unless that’s what your daddy wants, of course).

6. Stick to the agreement.

It’s a bad idea to cancel on a sugar daddy or to show up late or to change the terms of the existing arrangement. The point of establishing a concrete agreement is to avoid unwanted surprises. At the same time, rich older men tend to be extremely busy, so sugar babies should be prepared to be flexible about changes in their schedules. That might seem unfair, but it’s part of the unwritten code of sugar dating. Be accommodating—but only up to a certain extent. A sugar daddy should be wealthy enough to provide his sugar baby with her allowance or gifts or whatever’s agreed to in a timely fashion no matter what. If at any point payment/gift giving is stalled, consider it a red flag.

7. Be discrete.

Discretion is the key to dating older, wealthy, powerful man. Always play it safe and assume that a sugar daddy doesn’t want you posting photos of them to your social media newsfeeds or discussing the specific terms of your relationship with anyone else.

8. Maximize the relationship.

The advantages of dating a sugar daddy go beyond the initial terms of your arrangement. As you get to know him, figure out how you can use his expertise, influence, and industry contacts to help you get ahead, not just financially but through networking and relationship building. Think of your sugar daddy as a mentor, advisor, friend, and confidante—someone to learn from as well as a romantic partner.

9. Manage your expectations.

It’s natural to develop romantic feelings for a sugar daddy, but keep in mind that this relationship is transactional foremost and romantic second. You might very well fall in love with each other, but you’re better off remembering that this is primarily about satisfying immediate, mutual needs. Stay open-minded without getting too attached. To keep your emotions in check, keep a journal so you can monitor the evolution of the relationship from your perspective. Ask yourself: How do I feel about him and our relationship? Am I getting everything I need? What would I do if he dumped me?

10. Always have a Plan-B.

OKAY

 FIRST OF ALL I NEED TO CALM DOWN 

 If you don’t know how to be an SB then get the FUCK OUT of the tag- not for my sake, but for yours and the sake of your fucking followers!

 What is this shit I’m reading on some of your SB stories? Some of you have a bloody screw loose!

 Here’s an example of what an SB story should NOT look like:

 “Soooo…I met this guy on AM and he looked really nice. said he was looking for a financial arrangement. I said my minimum allowance was 4k a month for three meets he agreed- he said he would take me to a restaurant, take me shopping, give me the first part of my allowance and then we could have sex at his hotel. Then a couple of days before our meet he changes his tactic and said that he won’t give me my allowance until AFTER I sleep with him and I was like ookaay?? Like I wasn’t okay with it, but I’m a pro SB so I kept it cool. So we meet up and he was super aggressive and controlling- he said he wanted to keep my bag in his car for ‘safe-keeping’ and I was like, okayyy then wtf?? But I did cos them dolla bitches ;P Anyway we got dinner at the Red Lobster and he got me some things at Sephora…he said we should take his car so we did. Then I found out it wasn’t a hotel at all, it was his house?? And it wouldn’t tell me where we were?? But I was cool cos I’m an SB after all… So we did it, I come down the next morning and there’s only $70 on the counter? I mean ugh- SALT alert! Never again, hunnies! But POT date tonight planned so yah hopefully things are better.”

 -This piece is dedicated to the hundred fucking ridiculous stories I have thus seen today.

 If you see yourself at all in this piece and think: “Did she maybe read my story and…?”

 YES PROBABLY NOW PLEASE FOR GOD SAKES LISTEN I JUST WANT TO FUCKING HELP YOU

 - NEVER lower your standards. You see when the girl in the fake story, let’s call her Miss A. You know when Miss A backed down on her set conditions to accomodate what he wanted. A) That makes you look desperate. B) Now he knows he can back you down. C) Now she’s agreed to have sex with him before he gives her the allowance- why is this wrong? Well…

- NEVER have sex with him before he gives you the allowance. Read this back. What did I just say? “But he-” NOPE. “He promised-” NO. “But he’s a Leo and I’m a Scorpio and Leos never lie to Sc-” FUCKING LISTEN. DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH HIM BEFORE THE ALLOWANCE IF YOU DON’T FOLLOW THIS RULE THEN STOP BEING AN SB IT IS THAT SIMPLE.

- “But he bought me some gifts first!” So fucking what? He took you around the mall and got you some $50 hand soap, I don’t see the cold hard cash, do you?

- NEVER get in his car. Don’t go near his car. Don’t leave your stuff in it- jesus do you really need me to tell you this? Do you want to get raped/killed/kidnapped? Don’t. Fucking. Trust. Him. He’s a man you just met and you are a young girl, fucking don’t fling yourself arse first in dangerous situations!

- Also, what happened to Miss A? They ended up at his house. What’d you think I’m going to say about that? Consider it. What do you think I’m going to say? DON’T GO INTO A POT’S HOUSE. EVER. NEVER. I don’t care if your appendix is bursting and you need a place to lie down and you’re in a middle of the desert with a thunderstorm above you and his house is four yards away. Gather bush craft materials and stay fucking smart.

- So Miss A got fucked out of her money. Did she deserve it? You might think yes, but I don’t think any working girl should get fucked out of anything. This is sad truth and happens to a lot of girls. Unless the 90% of stories I’ve been reading on the tag are dummied up. “How do I avoid this?” If you read the above of this text, you already know how.

- Miss A rationalized her lack of action with ‘keeping cool about it’ or ‘being cool’. Is being cool more important than not being raped? Is it more important than gathering up the beer stained 1s off the counter after a night of terrible sex? If something isn’t right- MAKE A FUSS. If he starts behaving weirdly, raise your voice, start to cry, get people to NOTICE the situation because nothing scares a potential rapist/murderer/fuckboy off more than people scrutinizing the situation. And NOW he knows you’re not going to stand there like a mute dumbfuck while he goes about his fuckery.

- You see how Miss A jumped right back into her sugar game after this monumental series of mistakes? You see how she didn’t take a breather, reevaluate her game, even recognise the places where she went wrong? If Miss A and you could be SB twins, listen to me: You’ve been stupid but I love you and here’s what you have to do:

- Take out at least two weeks of serious thinking. Firstly, is this really for you? It’s okay if it isn’t by the way. Set limits, goals and STICK TO THEM. See my safety guidelines up there? Please for the love of anything you believe in: FOLLOW THEM.

- Background research. Research your POTs as much as possible. Look at the SB blacklist.

- When messaging, be classy, confident but FIRM. Let them know they can’t fuck with you and what you say goes.

- Get the money FIRST.

- No ‘private spaces’ on the first date. Some SBs might tell you different and that it’s a ‘personal choice’ but honestly if you’re already entangled in Miss A’s situation, just don’t.

- Is he acting creepy? BOLT. BOOK IT. LEG IT. IT NEVER ENDS WELL. “Well maybe he’s just a little awkward.” Yeah and maybe he’s got girl’s severed heads lined up in his basement. Is it WORTH IT?!

Look. I had to write this. I had to at least try to do something about the influx of young, sweet SBs who get stars in their eyes from all the designer bags and money shots from the older ladies on the tag.

 How did the experienced, successful SBs we know and love get there?

Heard some important information on Twitter today, and thought I’d post it here for anyone who may not have heard it. This is actually a thing, devised by a human rights organisation called Karma Nirvana.