Valjean: Literal cryptid, talks to no one, reads travelogues for fun, and writes a dying confession to his daughter that's actually a history of imitation jet manufacturing methods. The potentially greatest Tumblrista of all time, but unfortunately posts next to nothing.
Javert: Abhors reading and writing.
Fantine: Actually illiterate. :(
Marius: Polyglot professional writer, disqualified due to unbridled displays of heterosexuality.
Gavroche: Too young to use the website, per Tumblr ToS. [Fortunately, this sign cannot stop him because he probably cannot read. Unfortunately, that might prevent him from posting anything.]
Enjolras: Too busy doing actual organizing IRL to bother with Tumblr, and very careful with InfoSec online.
Grantaire: Help! Someone has released a reddit-bro on this website!
Clear Winners
Ăponine & Cosette: Lonely teenage girls with few or no avenues for socializing in real life? Tumblr was made for them.
Honorable Mention
Other Amis: Combeferre would reblog interesting posts and articles on every topic imaginable (often with corrections or adding needed citations). Prouvaire writes poetry and excited screeds about statistics, and will recommend all his favorite authors. Feuilly has friends all over the world and is loving it. Courfeyrac posts constantly during every (rare) lecture he attends, and otherwise is too busy socializing. Joly's blog is full of cat pictures and vague posts mooning about his crush. Bossuet's is all puns, peppy unbelievable stories about his weird misfortunes, and the odd intense legal discussion. Bahorel has tons of pictures of adventures all around the city; not one of them has recoverable meta-data or shows an identifiable individual.
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When contradicted, he raised his cane; he beat people as he had done in the great century.
:)))
He had a daughter over fifty years of age, and unmarried, whom he chastised severely with his tongue, when in a rage, and whom he would have liked to whip. She seemed to him to be eight years old. He boxed his servantsâ ears soundly, and said: âAh! carogne!â
 he had himself shaved every day by a barber who had been mad and who detested him, being jealous of M. Gillenormand on account of his wife, a pretty and coquettish barberess
BARBER GUY YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO DO THE FUNNIEST THING
Courfeyrac encapsulates so much about what I love of the second wave Romanticsâ that instinctive, immediate friendship for people who seem lost; the commitment to social justice and to actively changing their society; the wit and seeming frivolity that overlays a very serious and active sense of justice; the sense of a warm community of friends who support and help each other; the idea that enjoyment of the finer things in life are not incompatible with dedication to a good and necessary cause, but are, in fact, a necessary part of it; the gallows humor; the way art, literature, and philosophy are so much a part of life, theyâve become punning mattersâ and, above all, the punning.
Whenever someone tells you something is too short, always remember Les Mis Volume III: Marius; Book I: Paris Studied in its Atom; Chapter XII: The Future Latent in the People is literally one (1!) paragraph long :p
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If you have ever wanted to know more about the locations in Paris where Victor Hugo says that Valjean, Javert and the other characters walked, this will be for you. Using contemporary and modern maps, photographs, engravings and paintings, this book gives detailed written and illustrated histories for 35 locations connected with the novel, the musical and the life of Victor Hugo, including the sites of the Barricade, the Rue Plumet, the quay where Javert commits suicide, the Cafe Musain, the church where Marius and Cosette are married, the street where Valjean dies, the street where Hugo was nearly killed on the night of the barricades, the Pantheon where he is buried, the place on the river bank where Valjean and Marius emerge from the sewers, and many more. And if you visit Paris in person, the book includes information on travel to each location by Metro, bus and bicycle, together with two suggested walking tours on the Right and Left Banks.
All profits are donated to Acting For Others, which provides financial and emotional support to all those working in theatrical professions, through its network of 14 member charities. I will receive no financial benefit whatsoever.
It's available as a Kindle download for ÂŁ5.99/$7.99; as a paperback with colour illustrations for ÂŁ21.50/$28.98; and as a paperback with illustrations in black & white for ÂŁ12.50/$16.79.Â
If you like it, please leave a rating and review on Amazon: if I get more than 10 positive reviews and ratings, Amazon will do more to help me publicise it, which would hopefully mean more sales and more funds raised for Acting for Others.Â
These are the links to all three editions on Amazon:
Black & white edition:https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0H2WCQTHM
really endeared by this thing victor hugo does where we wont see jean valjean for a few chapters and then he'll be like. and here is a MAN who is EXCEPTIONALLY STRONG and KIND and QUIET and depending on whether or not its post m. sur m. has WHITE HAIR and NO ONE KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT HIM and ill say victor is this man jean valjean? and he'll say no...đ€ its just some other man who happens to have INCREDIBLE STRENGTH which is VERY CONVENIENT and allows him to do something no one else could. and then like three pages later he'll go suprise! it was jean valjean all along! and i'll pretend to be suprised. its like peekaboo for 186-s french men
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Thanks so much for all the nice comments on the Enjolras booklist! I'm going to be putting out all of the Les Amis booklists I've made over the next few weeks. (Or, trying, idk Grantaire might break the tumblr post character limit.) For now, here are all the allusions made by, about, or to Courfeyrac throughout Les Mis. The Courfeyrac book club!
Courfeyrac is one of the triumvirate at the heart of Les Amis and especially since heâs Mariusâs bestie / roommate, he gets some of the most dialogue out of all the barricade boys. However, he doesnât make that many literary allusions. Honestly, after Enjolrasâs monster of a booklist, this was a bit of a relief. Thanks, Courf, youâre a real one.
At one point, Courfeyrac tells Marius he should read less books and talk to more ladies, and he absolutely follows his own advice. He demonstrably prefers plays and other social activities to reading, but he does canonically have a bookshelf! Courfeyrac is literally the only member of Les Amis whose bookshelf is described on the page, even though Victor Hugo doesnât say the names of any books on it, smh. Weâll get into that later.Â
TLDR: Courfeyrac loves gossip! He doesnât seem to read for fun, he seeks out mostly political and biographical non-fiction. He loves to have juicy fun facts and witty critiques ready to go for when he's hanging out with his boys. When he does reference something that's fiction, itâs always a play. He'd rather go out on the town than sit at home reading a book. Love that for him.
Confessions by Jean-Jacques Rousseau (English)
âCourfeyrac took his arm. âTake note. This is Rue Platreire, now called Rue Jean-Jacques-Rousseau, on account of an unusual couple that lived here sixty years ago. They were Jean-Jacques and Therese. From time to time there were little ones born here. Therese brought them into the world, Jean-Jacques brought them to the foundling hospital.ââ (Les Mis 3.4.3)
Courfeyrac is one of the only members of Les Amis that doesnât get a signature literary reference during his introduction. The first allusion he makes is actually a few scenes later, when heâs out walking with Marius and Enjolras and he decides to share some juicy gossip about Jean-Jacques Rousseau (Enjolrasâs bias) with Marius, which pisses off Enjolras. Itâs extremely messy and extremely funny. I love this scene.
The record of Jean-Jacques Rousseau abandoning all five of his children actually comes from Rousseauâs own autobiography. Honestly, the whole autobiography reads a lot like a Youtube apology video, idk how else to describe it. I really love this essay (link) by Paul De Man called âExcusesâ that utterly rips into one particular passage in this autobiography as an example of how the whole thing is just full of performative guilt. For the record, itâs not even calling out the part about Rousseau abandoning his children, itâs laying into a totally different passage where Rousseau is confessing to a totally different problematic thing he did as a child. Itâs truly a Youtube apology video through and through, and Enjolras is absolutely in the comments defending him.
Fun fact, the book is also the real origin of the phrase âlet them eat cake.â Rousseau attributed the quote to some unspecified French princess but then, because Marie Antoinette was growing more and more unpopular at the time the book was published, it erroneously got credited to her. And now thatâs how we all remember it. Fascinating! All this to say, this is a great first example of the kind of trendy stuff and messy gossip that Courfeyrac loves. Heâs a social guy with a good sense of drama.
The French Charter of 1814 (English)
âThe 1814 Charter was coming under criticism. Combeferre was weakly defending it, Courfeyrac was energetically attacking it. On the table was an offending copy of the famous Touqet Charter. Courfeyrac had seized it and was waving it, accompanying his arguments with the rustling of this sheet of paper.â (Les Mis 3.4.4)ââNo granting to the people by royal favour. In all such grants there is an Article 14. Alongside the hand that gives is the claw that takes back.ââ (Les Mis 3.4.4)
The 1814 Charter was the basis for constitutional monarchy in France. Courfeyrac hates this thing, but heâs clearly read it so it makes the list! Thereâs not too much to say about it. Article 14 is specifically the part that gave the king executive power, and Courfeyrac calls it out in particular as evidence that the 1814 Charter is a bad deal for the people of France. This is incredibly prescient, because just a couple years later King Charles X would use Article 14 as his justification for suspending the liberty of the press and several other ordinances that resulted in the July Revolution of 1830. Then, at the end of his scathing review, Courfeyrac dramatically throws a copy into the fire for the vibes and everyone claps watches it burn.
The Age of Louis XIV by Voltaire (English)
ââA king is a parasite. Kings donât come free. Listen to this: the cost of kings. When Francois I died, Franceâs national debt was thirty thousand francs a year. By the time Louis XIV died, it was two thousand six hundred million at twenty-eight francs to the marc, which was equivalent in 1760, by Desmaretâs reckoning, to four thousand five hundred million, which today would be twelve thousand million.ââ (Les Mis 3.4.4)
During his rant about the French Charter of 1814, Courfeyrac also makes some very specific claims about the national debt accrued by Louis XIV during his reign and the building of Versailles. This is apparently based on the figures found in Voltaireâs biography of Louis XIV, chapter 30. I love that Courfeyrac read this entire novel just to have receipts on Louis XIV, literally.
Thereâs actually an interesting podcast I listened to recently that also talks about Versailles and the economic impact of Louis XIVâs reign (Behind the Bastards, link, link). For the record, I fully believe that Courfeyrac would love podcasts. In my modern au, Courfeyrac would absolutely be the type of friend whoâs always recommending you some new political podcast heâs found.
The French Civil Code of 1804 (English)
Penal Code of 1810 (English)
âWhile all this was going on [Marius] qualified as a lawyer. He was supposedly living in Courfeyracâs room, which was respectable and where a certain number of law books, propped up and augmented by a few odd volumes of novels, represented the library required by the regulations.â (Les Mis 3.5.1)
Courfeyrac's bookshelf! So first things first, Victor Hugo is pissing me off telling me that Courfeyrac has a bookshelf but not telling me which âodd volumes of novelsâ are on it. He can tell me every excruciating detail about the Parisian sewer system but he canât tell me what Courfeyracâs favorite books are?? Sigh, whatever, Iâll just imagine the books on his shelf are the rest of the books on this booklist, I guess. Anyway, letâs talk about those law books.
Weâre not told a lot of specifics about the âcertain number of law booksâ on Courfeyracâs shelf, but we can make a few educated guesses: 1, There are plural books. 2, There are not many of them. The books are propped up so they don't fill a shelf. 3, The books fulfilled the requirements to practice as a lawyer in Paris around the year 1831. And 4, Marius is not actually using these books to practice law. The books are just there to look aesthetically like a lawyer might read them while Marius is actually across town working his translation job that Courfeyrac also got him. Courfeyrac is such a good friend. So basically, for the several books in Courfeyracâs fake law library, Iâm looking for the absolute bare minimum: The Napoleonic Codes.
A bit of backstory. Before the French Revolution, the justice system in France was⊠bad. The law wasnât consistent or properly written down and the legal process could be pretty inhumane. The revolutionary government knew it desperately needed an overhaul so in 1791 they created Franceâs very first written criminal code (link). Under the new code, you could only be accused of a written law, your trial had to be timely, you had the right to a lawyer, and several things that were previously considered crimes were no longer criminal, like homosexuality. Fun fact, France was actually the first European country to decriminalize homosexuality, due in large part to the changes pushed through by one cool guy: Louis-Michel le Peletier. He also advocated for womenâs education and was one of the deciding votes to kill King Louis XVI, so of course heâs a villain you have to kill in Assassinâs Creed Unity. Donât even get me started on that game smh, it consistently has the worst takes. Justice for the girls, the gays, and Louis-Michel.
Anyway, when Napoleon came back to power a few years after the Revolution, he commissioned a civil code, which would become the first of five codes known as the Napoleonic Codes: the Civil Code of 1804, the Code of Civil Procedure of 1806, the Commercial Code of 1807, the Code of Criminal Procedure of 1808, and the Penal Code of 1810. Iâm not a law historian, but you can check out this webinar from the Library of Congress if you want more context (link).
So, uh, in conclusion⊠did Courfeyrac even read these books?? Who knows. But he does own them and they sit on a bookshelf in his apartment, so thatâs good enough for me.
âŠI couldnât find Audry de Puyraveauâs speech
âOver dessert [Marius] said to Courfeyrac. âHave you read the paper? What a fine speech Audry de Puyraveau gave!ââ (Les Mis 3.6.6)
This is a reference that Marius makes to Courfeyrac after he makes eye contact with Cossette in the garden and starts a two-day manic episode where he talks really fast, spends a bunch of money, eats a surprising amount of food, and impulsively hugs a lot of people. Okay letâs be real, thereâs no way that Victor Hugo, living in exile from France and with no internet, was accurately referencing one specific newspaper article about a speech that Audry de Puyraveau gave nearly 30 years prior in early July of 1831. I knew there was no way Iâd ever find this specific speech in some particular paper... But I searched anyway. I really wanted to see if Marius was embarrassing himself with a bad take again, but I guess Iâll never know because I couldnât find the speech. I honestly should have just cut this one from Courfeyracâs list altogether since I couldnât find it, itâs not really a book, and thereâs no real proof Courfeyrac even read it â Iâm just assuming he wouldnât leave his bro hanging since Marius brought it up. But I had spent too much time researching and the sunk cost kicked in, so here you go.
For context, Audry de Puyraveau was a major figure in the July Revolution of 1830 and one of the people who put Louis-Phillipe on the throne as part of the Paris Municipal Commission (which he served on as a Constitutional Republican). Puyraveau was re-elected to a public office a year later, in July of 1831, which is exactly the right time frame for this Les Mis quote so I thought for sure Iâd be able to find some kind of political speech relating to the elections⊠but no dice. I actually couldnât find a transcript of any speech from this manâs entire life anywhere. I found a fair number of articles (and some art) about him and his role in the July Revolution, which were actually really funny because everyone on the left thinks heâs way too conservative for pussying out of the July Revolution by putting a king in charge again. And everyone on the right thinks heâs way too liberal for helping to instigate the July Revolution and suggesting that there should be any sort of elective government. So you get these wildly conflicting accounts of this guy whoâs honestly just center left. Kind of a perfect guy for Marius to look up to. Like if a modern Marius was super obsessed with Joe Biden.
The best lead I found was in this book from 1844, The History of Ten Years 1830-1840, that says, on page 514, that Puyraveau is one of the people who gave a speech in opposition to hereditary peerage in 1831 (link). But the speech is from September, so it canât be the one Marius is talking about. I also found another book from 1850, The History of Secret Societies and of the Republican Party of France From 1830 to 1848, that calls the man thoroughly mediocre, which I think is hysterical considering how excited Marius is about him (link).
Anyway, in conclusion, I do not know if this speech was as fine as Marius said or if Courfeyrac liked it. Oh well.
LâAuberge des Adrets by Benjamin Antier, Saint-Amand and Paulyanthe (English, French)
Anyway, I have no idea what Courfeyrac thought of this play, Victor Hugo doesnât tell us. He invited Marius to brunch after this and seemed amused, so signs point to him having at least a decent time. Itâs also exactly the kind of new, daring, sort of scandalous thing that would usually appeal to Courfeyrac.
âAnyone entering the restaurant room would read the following line chalked on the door by Courfeyrac: âEnjoy if you can and eat if you dare.ââ (Les Mis 4.12.1)
...And that's it! Again, Iâm not an expert on French history or literature, so it's definitely possible there are references I missed. If you notice one, please let me know. In the meantime, thanks for reading!!
My endless gratitude goes to @pilferingapples !! Thank you so much for shedding light on the characterization of Bahorel and checking his line. đđł
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