dokani

its kind of wild how you meet people and then like a month passes and they're your friends. literally how did that happen. i feel like ive known you forever but there was a time where you had to ask me my name

this follows me everywhere. i keep having tiktoks of people doing this popping up. i cannot escape.

THIS IS NOT ENOOOOOUGH

*takes off my leather jacket to reveal a second, secret leather jacket underneath*

you mean, skin?

What an absolutely terrifying addition to my post. Thank you.

whats the meaning of life? son, its those little tiny pumpkins. the ones that are mad small.  you know the ones i mean. 

Another fun thing I do with customers - specifically parents of very small children who don’t know they’re alive yet - is directly imply I think the coffee is for the baby, not the parent. and lemme tell you, like 70% of parents eat that shit up. They immediately go along with the bit and start discussing it with their newborn child, while the baby just stares at us like 😮