ooc: Formal Resignation
Apparently this couldn't wait any longer, and I will need to properly apologize ahead of time. Profusely. And I will also apologize for not trimming this. All My Robots was founded with a lot of love, it originally was not going to be a serious rp community. We had fun, and eventually it got bigger. More organized. I was happy to see a lot of robots running about, pleased by the plots and interpersonal interactions. I wrote the rules and assisted the mod team in really tying it all together, things really became solidified, and the rest is history. We have an innate sense of oneness, even after one leaves the group. We usually treat each other damn well, and we do our best to keep our communication open. I have failed to do this for the past few months. It is not my place to excuse my actions, but it IS my place to reaffirm that I do indeed love the group and want nothing but the best for it. In the beginning I didn't think I would stay a month, but I did. I didn't think I would break my one-on-one bindings and attempt to get in well with a group, I did. And I didn't think I would continue to keep trying here, even when my real-life on-goings would deter me from doing so; on top of actions and words thrown at me, claiming I never tried-- I did. And I will still care. I have suffered from crippling depression for a very long time. Only recently have I sought treatment to rectify this. It's been helping me a great deal, but the world won't wait. I don't expect it to. My hiatus has been a long one and I feel alien trying to reincorporate my characters, and it hurts when I can't. Then it becomes an issue, I end up questioned harshly for it, and it likely looks really terrible from a third party perspective overall. THIS IS NOT ANYONES FAULT, I don't do this because I dislike anyone, I don't do this because I hate rping with anyone, and I don't do this because I hate the rp. I am literally just at a loss for what to do with myself and my characters. To get to the bottom line and not further draw any issues out, I am hereby resigning my position as Moderator and putting the rest of my characters up for adoption. (Or, as the remainder of the mod team sees fit, they may nuke them entirely, or they may screen them. I trust them in their decisions.) I have no right to stay further and keep holding out hope that I will find the desire to play, especially when life has been rather demanding of me. I will not be disappearing completely, and I would be happy to relay my text-based personal if you drop a message. I will still draw robots, I will still be friends with everyone here. I still love you guys. You've all been truly wonderful. I am glad to have been a part of seeing this place come to fruition. I hope whomever takes my characters place brings you as much joy as I had tried to in the past, and they manage to keep themselves up-to-speed better than I could right now. Maybe one day when I get everything settled with myself, I will reapply as a normal member. To anyone angry or upset with me, please know I am sincerely sorry for anything I may have caused. I try to keep only the best of intentions, but I am only human. Please speak to me directly anytime, I don't want any bad blood. I don't think my heart could handle it, haha. Thank you all, again. Keep at it, stay strong, never stop loving your robots. ♥
