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When the honeymoon stage ends what happens

You’re more honest with each other. Bodily functions are something to laugh about. Sweatpants and tee shirts are a regular thing. They know what you look like without all the makeup. Being “laid up and watching Netflix” is the only thing you’re looking forward to after work. You don’t go on fancy dates as often but you trade that for quality time. You find yourself being more vulnerable and you open up more. They become your best friend. You will able to talk about anything. You won’t be worried about impressing their parents, you’re just gonna love them anyway regardless of how their parents may feel. You will have inside jokes that no one else will get. Sex is not as often but, twice as passionate. Little fights will happen, but you’ll learn not to sweat the small stuff. You’ll learn what compromise really is about. You’ll dream about the future together. Grow together. Be on each other’s team. See their ugly crying face, and be the one to wipe the tears away & do something stupid to make them life. things are amazing after the honeymoon stage. However, it’s a time about giving up your walls and open up some doors you have locked a long time ago.

Nothing haunts you like unexpressed feelings.

I never understood the advice that you should be happy single before you seek out a relationship. If I had the potential to be *that* happy being single then what would be the point in romantic partnership?

I really think it’s a toned down (or even camouflaged) extension of the whole “if you seem too eager you lose” thing. 

I think if that’s what was meant that would have been what was said. But in any case, while I definitely think it’s ideal to be 100% content with yourself and your life and all of that prior to getting into a relationship…I don’t think that’s a requirement. 

For me, when I met my soon-to-be husband I didn’t even know I would ever date him never mind marry him as I was still dealing with issues from past relationships, mostly psychological. When we started dating, I had severe trust issues that were mitigated over time by his constancy and his patience.

when people say it’s important to be happy single before being in a relationship, it’s meant more in the sense of having good self esteem and healthy understandings of what a solid relationship looks like before getting into a relationship. i think that it’s easy for people who have not been in situations where they have struggled with self esteem or understanding what a healthy relationship looks like to think that skipping the stage of being happy with yourself before being in a relationship is no big deal. but for people who have been through trauma, hardship, and heart ache, sometimes you have to work to be ok and happy alone before being in a relationship.

Just speaking personally, I was generally happy when I was single but I wasn’t happy about being single. And that’s what I’m saying in this post. For me, I don’t feel that I’m meant to be single in any long term capacity and marriage and children, just like obtaining an education, is a solid part of what I want and envision for my life.

To be concise, what I meant is that nobody should feel like they should be happy about being single before they can pursue a relationship because some people are never going to be happy about being single because life partnership is on their heart.

1. you have made it to 20! what a whirlwind year it has been but if you can survive 2016 you can survive anything. 2. remember that love trumps hate any day, everyday. just keep spreading love and being the best person you can be. 3. last year was definitely not your year for romance, try it this year though. I have a feeling a lot of love is coming your way. 4. school is a priority, do not ever forget that. you are so fortunate to be able to even attend college so just try your hardest in each and every class. 5. DO NOT SKIP YOUR 8AM! you signed up for it, you now have your afternoons free to study as you please. it’s an important class and really an hour difference of sleep is not going to kill you. 6. go to bed early, you’ll thank yourself when that 8am roles around. 7. take care of your body. eat healthy but eat good. make sure you are hydrated and exercise on the days that you can. you know that you always feel so good after you exercise. 8. keep meeting new people and keep making friends. talk to people in your classes, make new friends and study buddies. 9. when you are not feeling good on the inside remember to just take time to unplug and go outside. 10. remember your worth. this can be applied to friendships, to relationships and even when you are with just with yourself. you are worth so much and you have purpose, you are just starting to figure out new parts of your journey, don’t be so hard on yourself. 11. you can change your mind. 12. don’t let people make you feel bad for not wanting to do what you used to do, for changing and growing. 13. do not be afraid to let this love inside. when people give it to you sometimes you make up excuses to not take it. don’t do this, embrace the love and keep giving yours as well. 14. last year was so hard there is no doubt. but baby he doesn’t think about you anymore and you were not worth anything to him. that was not love and there is no love there. he is in the past, he is not your future. just let it go. let him go. no more. 15. you make each day what you will. it’s up to you and you are writing your story, you get to decided the paths that you take and the people you get to take it with. mistakes happen along the way and you can recover. you are in charge. 16. just spread love. give it to yourself in abundance and give it to the people you meet and want to keep getting to know.  17. be who you want to be in 2017. there are so many possibilities and so many different outcomes and lots of things that we do and do not have control over. make sure that the things you can control that you do. make sure that you spread love and light. we all are going to need it.

me: im done catching feelings for people it’s such a waste im really done