You've Been Fooled

I WORKED SO HARD ON THIS AND I'M SO HAPPY WITH HOW IT TURNED OUT YAYYYY

The new magic stops working after three days and every spell uses proprietary runes.

It's called "Extending Protections to More US-Based Teens" and it goes into effect on August 13, 2025.

Google states that on that date, they'll begin rolling out "an age estimation model to determine if a US-based user is under the age of 18." No way AI can fuck that up, right?

This will occur "regardless of the birthdate you entered when creating your account." So, a 33-year-old like myself, despite putting my accurate birthdate, will still be subjected to this AI model and cannot opt out. Great.

And then they'll use the model to market shit to teenagers, because that's always gone well--wait, I'm sorry, they'll use it to "extend age-appropriate product experiences and protections to more teens (like enabling digital wellbeing tools and only showing non-personalized ads)." Right.

Google claims they've used this model elsewhere and it's worked well. (I'm assuming they're referring to the age verification roll out in response to the UK’s Online Safety Act.)

The model in question uses "a variety of signals" like "YouTube activity and longevity of the account." Well that's not vague at all.

When ZDNet reached out, "a YouTube representative stressed that the age-estimation model 'does not collect any new information not already associated with the account'"--which is true... unless your account is anonymous. To revert an account wrongfully flagged as underage, you have to upload a government issued ID, selfie, or credit card. Which defeats the purpose of an anonymous account.

Like the op, I tried to voice my displeasure at the further encroachment of artificial intelligence onto internet platforms. And like op, my reply "failed to post."

What I want to know is what about the above reply or mine

violates community policy? Or does Google just have AI content filters set up to ping key phrases? This is particularly grating when community policy specifically prohibits spam comments and shit like this

makes it through but comments that disagree with policy decisions are automatically flagged as inappropriate.

Regardless, this is fucking bunk, on three levels.

Firstly, what a child consumes on the internet is not the responsibility of the internet--or its users. It is the responsibility of the parent of that child.

Parental controls exist not just on televisions, but on phones and computers as well. Not only is it available via the hardware we're using to access the platform, it's also already available on the fucking platform.

Secondly, with this AI age verification rollout, Google is telling its consumers that they get to decide what we consume. That we as consumers are not in control of our experience and that we clearly do not know what is in our own best interests.

This is a violation of the concept of consumer sovereignty.

Thirdly, this model is more or less the implementation of Google's own privatized version of KOSA. Which, as we've discussed ad nauseam here on Tumblr and on the internet at-large, is largely the first step toward internet censorship.

I don't think I need to remind anyone that censorship is bad. For lots of reasons.

And look, I know we're all tired. There are Things Happening and they just keep fucking happening. I know it's a lot.

But you and me? We're the boss in this situation. No company should ever feel comfortable enough to dictate what its consumers can and cannot access. Companies work for us. Without consumers, companies cease to exist. So we have a lot more power than it feels like we do in this situation.

For better or worse, Google and YouTube are part of the ecosystem of information on the internet. And access to information is important. The freedom to access information is a right that we must protect at all costs, regardless of the age of the person accessing that information.

So take a deep breath. And keep yelling at them about this.

You can:

Spam their social media.

Call their customer service line (1-650-253-0000).

File a complaint with the Better Business Bureau.

(Politely) Yell at your local news media--if local news covers it, there's a chance that national news might.

Sign this petition (or another like it).

And if you're sick of Google's bullshit, you can also just... stop. Stop using their services. And let them know that's why you're leaving.

There are alternatives to Google services:

Proton has a VPN, email service, and also has a drive, similar to Google's, as well as a docs feature similar to Google docs.

Ellipsus is an alternative to Google docs.

Obsidian is another.

There's also Dropbox Paper.

LibreOffice is an alternative to the Google suite/Microsoft Office suite and storage is local to your device rather than the cloud.

DuckDuckGo is a great alternative to Google search, with an easy opt-out for AI features.

Firefox is a good alternative browser for Chrome.

Twitch, Vimeo and DailyMotion, are viable alternatives for YouTube, depending on what you use it for.

There is, unfortunately, no perfect solution. Google has a monopoly on many of the services it offers, including video-sharing.

But that's another great reason to contact your reps! If you want to keep using YouTube and other Google products, or you don't want other companies to follow Google's lead, go yell at your representatives about it. They have the power to demand action on a state and federal level to protect their constituents.

Call and demand they protect their constituents from predatory business practices (which demanding an ID or credit card, when they have a history of data breaches, most certainly is). Tell your reps that it's against your freedom as a consumer for Google to decide what is and is not appropriate for its consumers to consume, and nowhere in the Constitution does it say that Google is arbiter of our access to information. And let them know that their action or lack thereof will directly impact your voting decisions during the next election.

The only way we can get companies like Google to stop doing stupid shit like this is to get loud about it and to stop using their services.

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For the curious, here are the links I used in my attempted reply:

This one is from 2021, when they were sued for allegedly selling user data to third parties: https://www.tampabay.com/news/2021/05/07/google-selling-users-personal-data-despite-promise-federal-court-lawsuit-claims/

sugishita kyotaro, absolutely fearless, until--

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