WE ALL FLOAT DOWN HERE

i’ve waited for like 2 years for hbo’s the staircase only for them to not include that david rudolf powerpoint mental breakdown scene

Yes I Own That Book, No I Haven’t Read It: An Autobiography

I don’t get how ppl take quick power naps. When I nap I literally never wake up

You can probably tell which family member is coming upstairs by their step pattern but wouldn’t be able to pick out your own

If my own footsteps were coming down the hall towards me I reckon I would have bigger problems on my hands…

THE DEEP HAS ACCEPTED YOUR OFFERING OF PIZZA. YOU SHALL BE SPARED.

Do you want walking land eels, because that’s how you get walking land eels.

I’m obsessed with this.

when you’re a kid and you’re feeling weird and detached and you fall asleep in the late afternoon with school clothes still on and you wake up and its dark and dinner is almost done and time feels like a thick jelly 

Holy shit