The Queen of Nothing

Simon "The Butcher" Iron Lung

Look at those eyes. Peak babygirl. Don't you want to see him go through trauma? Don't you want to BITE???

And let's not forget:

the harness

look at those bazongas. These alone deserve to win. This should honestly be my last and only point but consider this:

Mark is aware of Bloodymary.

How fucking funny is it gonna be if, during the final round, much like Toby Fox during the great Sans vs Reigen finale, Mark acknowledges the race. Sure it'd probably be subtlely, bUT IMAGINE IT

Anyway, the next night we watched a thing about some pig man who is supposed to live in Vermont. People said it had claws and a pig nose but walked upright like a man. Now, I happen to know that sideshows used to shave bears and present them as pig men. So every piece of evidence they gave of this monster sounds to me like a bear with mange.

So now the running joke in our house is that everything is bears. Aliens? Bears. Loch Ness monster? Bear. Every cryptozoological mystery is just a very crafty bear.