no mourners, no funerals

@discoastrophysicist

Among my favorites are:

“I’m a thirsty bitch.”

“I enjoy a good bear.”

“You wanna hear some poetry?! Eh?! Fuckers??!?”

“There’s nothing wrong with Backstreet Boys. Backstreet’s back, alright?”

Describing a cheese: “It’s like a tangy lad.”

“If I was a woman, I’d be on [John Hurt]. I’d be on him like butter on hot toast. Just…quickly liquid.” (I think he meant John Hurt circa 1984, but who knows.)

“[Alexander Skarsgård] is a tall, handsome gentleman. He’s built like a beautiful tree. Just smooth. Like a smooth, beautiful tree.”

“I, for one, welcome the resurgence of the phrase ‘Missed me, missed me, now you gotta kiss me’ to diffuse heated exchanges on our roads.”

“I will use these powers, for evil.”

“A gentleman would never worship and tell.”

On what his drag name would be: “Little Ho Peep.”

On being told he has an old soul: “I mean, I’m tired all the time, if that’s what that means.”

“I’m over 3,000 years old, thank you for asking.”

“I won’t judge you. Unless it’s really, really bad.”

“I can look like a lollipop dropped in the back of a car seat, on a bad [hair] day. Like a hairy stop sign.”

“One of the few things that make life very worth living is loving somebody. Or being loved. Coffee, chocolate, and sex are also very, very enjoyable.”

“Draw me like one of your Irish poets.”

“Hey, I’m Hozier, and I’m feeling like the coral reef after all the tourists have left.”

“Suffer me now, planet earth.”

On his man bun: “It is the source of all my powers.”

“I didn’t know what a man bun was until people started asking me about my man bun.”

“My music is about sex. I think sex is wonderful. I think it’s a fantastic part about being alive.”

“Handjobs for all!”

“It’s okay to give somebody their first one. Never give them their last. [thinks about what he’s said] That’s not… No, that’s not funny… Jeeesus christ, what a runt… Don’t- don’t record this.”

“Christ, that awful feeling again!”

After being blindfolded and made to eat a mystery cheese: “What am I doing with my life…”

“…my parents specifically asked you to stop this.”

“I’m not good at assimilating good news.”

“You have shown your true colours and they appear to me now as a rainbow of brown. Just shitty, shit brown. But not golden brown… like flapjacks. Let me make that absolutely clear.”

On pre-show rituals: “We would only slaughter a goat if we could get our hands on one.”

“I’m so happy to receive this phallic symbol. I’m gonna do some—some just, terrible things with it.”

“Was I wearing ladies underwear underneath my suit for that? No one will ever know.”

“I’m gonna turn it up ‘cause it’s sessssy… ssssssensual.”

“I have taken many drugs, and my eyes are, full of watery worms.”

[crowd cheers wildly] “What did I do?? Tell me, I’ll do it again!”

“You may call me Buzz-Kill Byrne.”

“Can my coffin be a giant boombox?”

“I don’t have favorite songs, but I have least favorite songs. Does that make sense? Much like your parents—they don’t have favorite children, but they have least favorite children. [whispers] And it’s you.”

[responding to a come-on] “Please, this is a church.”

[attempting a compliment] “Do you have a portrait in the attic somewhere?”

“I too know what it’s like to wait for the arrival of some long promised treasure…” 

“I really like the idea of love as a violent act—not to the person that you love, but against the world. To say to somebody, ‘I love you; by extension, I hate all other things.’”

“Being born, making love, and dying are maybe the three most human things you do.”

“Looking forward to hearing more about how the universe ends.”

On the “celery” in his porridge: “It’s chopped apple, I’m not Satan.”

“Ah yes, I do have the handwriting of a drunken child, thank you.”

“Is hungoverwhelmed a word? Like when you’re poisoned in an airport or trying to pack.”

“Damn that should have said descendants, and I should be asleep.”

“Push thru long enough & you can transcend the physical hangover and go straight to the metaphysical. Some eternal part of me has the shakes.”

ITS TIME!

(Also s-gossamer’s got taken down?)

Cloaked in nature~

THE CROWS + 😊😁

+ Kaz “Would it kill him to smile every once in a while?” Brekker