Dingo and Meow

Not my kid, not my husband. @iamkulap captured a real NY moment where a strange toddler demanded I hold her hand.

Remember that beautiful commune I talked about on #tspod? This is one of the members, Nikki Silva of the #kitchensisters who was randomly at @WNYC 's #werkitpodcasters lady podcasting power event. I tried to shove her into my body!

New hilarious #gayofthrones with @johnmilhiser as Bloody Mary and @gayofthrones with all he hair flips you could ever want. Might be my favorite this season! And no, I won't stop standing in front of the antlers.

Shot a Duggar video tonight with hilarious .@gregdavidjones. Wait for it.

This one might be my fav, @thriftstoreart

.@thriftstoreart is my new obsession
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"I so love handshaking! What about you? Hey when's break? Can we go to Chipotle for lunch? Woot woot office job! Movin' on up!"

LADIES! PLEASE SEE #MADMAX FURY ROAD! IT'S VAGINA OPERA!

Illuminati. Pants by @wndrgng #wndrgng

I love it when food evokes the thought of toes, the cleanest part of the body.

The greatest prank of the 80s was pulled off by Charlene, who trolled Duran Duran fans with her album that, from afar, is essentially the "Rio" cover zoomed in. Well played, Charlene, you tricky bitch!

Now, people are upset about this ad. They think it's demeaning to women, but I don't see it that way. It's demeaning to men. The men using Blowfish are so gross, when we drunk fuck them, we can't stand a moment past coming. These are the types of guys who fart in our faces when we're giving them blowjobs then fall asleep because they did too many car bombs. Which also explains his mucasy stool - and you know this because he shit his pants. You didn't care last night. He told you he used to be a J Crew model and you could sort of see it through the sun damage. But the minute you roll off the slime created by his sweat mixing with Axe Body Spray on his stomach, you see him for what he is-the kind of idiot who thinks anything could cure a hangover. Bye, dummy. #blowfish #cvs #walgreens

#bragging

New headshot. Please send all casting requests to my agent, Skywalker OG.

This is a painting my neighbor Paul found in an antique store. It's an original oil painting Spielberg had commissioned as gifts for people who worked on ET. Seeing this in his apartment is the most jealous I've ever been in my life.

Lettuce is like a pregnant woman standing outside of her car with a flat tire, waving for help. When you stop, all of a sudden bacon cheese and ranch dressing - a guy with face tats - holds a switchblade to your neck, telling you to "just relax an' nothing will happen." Lettuce is just the bait so bacon cheese ranch dressing can get sadistic on you. Salads are the Venus fly traps of lunches. Beware.

Really confused as to why the surfing world isn't more welcoming to women.

David Koresh doin' what he does best - rockin' out under those fluorescent lights, with his Vampiressa guitar, belting out a DK orig. Rock never looked so pale.