Just call me Digi

"Well I'm sorry you're a complete dumbass!"

"You were probably dropped on your head as a child, you fucking idiot!"

Jay had attempted to stop the arguing from Ryul and Woojin three separate times. They couldn't agree on some of the mixing for a song they were supposed to be working on, but every few minutes they would begin insulting and belittling one another. They couldn't get along when working on this one thing and it was driving Jay up the wall with every shout and interesting insult. He had almost given up on the project for the foreseeable future when you had texted, asking what he wanted for lunch.

The notification stopped him from beating his head onto the desk, your picture bringing a certain peace to the stressful environment he had placed himself in. He grabbed the phone and stepped out of the rather loud room and into the hall, pressing the 'call' symbol for your contact.

"Hi baby, you got a special request for lunch? I'm off the rest of the day." Your voice was light, a smile able to be heard through the phone and drawing a similar one on Jay's lips.

"No special requests this time, I have Woojin and Ryul with me and if they see you bring me food they'll basically jump me for it." He laughed sarcastically, leaning his head against the wall as another interesting insult was heard through the door. "I can make or buy enough for them too. Plus they'll probably think I'm just a delivery girl if I drop it off and leave fast."

A thump was heard against the wall, pulling an annoyed groan from Jay. You laughed at the sound, getting some ingredients from the fridge and pantry while listening to Jay lean back into the studio and scold the boys once more. You moved through the kitchen while listening to the chaos without issue, laughing at the boys fighting back with your husband. "Do you need me to come help keep them in line?"

"At this point, yes." He responded as he shut the studio door once more, quieting the insults and shouting once more. "I'm sick of these two and I can't get them to listen for anything."

"Let me make something for your lunch and I'll take care of it when I get there. Sound good?"

"That sounds perfect, thank you."

"Alright, I'll see you in an hour or so. Don't lose your mind too much in that time. I love you."

"I love you too babe, see you soon." You hung up as Jay stopped talking, signaling to him that he has to go back into the warzone the boys had set up. "How dare you critique my mixing capabilities?! You can't get above a D in any of your classes!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------*One Hour Later* ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The hour was exhausting, Jay yelling back on more than one thing the two continued to argue about. He was staring at the door when you opened it, carrying a rather large insulated bag for the room. "I brought lunch! I hope its good, the meat was more fatty than I was hoping."

Jay was on his feet before the door was fully open, grabbing the bag from you and pressing a kiss to your cheek. "Thank you baby, you really could've just brought take-out." The two boys were silent for the first time all day as they watched you and Jay embrace, their CEO lighting up completely as you step in the room with the three of them. "You know I would rather cook when I have the time. Also I want the pizza place down the road for dinner and I know you'll say yes if I make you food from scratch for lunch." Jay laughed in response, pulling the coffee table closer to the couch so they could eat while not working.

"Who are you?" Woojin pulled the question hanging in the air while watching you and Jay unload the bag and utensils as if you had done it a million times. Ryul promptly hit the back of Woojin's head, "Don't ask a lady that. How much brain damage did your parents give you?" You finally looked at the two with a hard gaze, mildly annoyed by the rather rude tone Woojin had and the minor violence Ryul displayed.

"One; do not take that tone with me and do not hit him." Your voice was reminiscent of their own mothers', forcing both to pause. "Two; who taught you to act like that in your workplace? Be more professional." They both nodded and bowed their heads, mumbling an apology to you. Jay beamed in pure delight at the boys finally listening.

"Guys, this is my wife, Y/N." The boys' heads snapped up, looking between the two of you in shock. "She made us lunch."

"You're married?!" Ryul was the one to break his silence first, "Since when?! Are you hiding it? How is this just under basically all media?!"

"Yes he's married," You said pushing gently on Jay's shoulder to make him sit and eat. "Don't yell, it's pointless if you want a reaction. And no, it's not a secret from the media, I just keep to myself and prefer to be home with the dog." You handed the boys their food before walking behind them and guiding them to chairs without explicitly telling them to sit and eat. Jay nodded along to your words as his mouth was already full. "He doesn't have a ring because we have dog tags with our anniversary and our names engraved instead."

Jay swallowed what was in his mouth, reaching for the water bottles you had brought as well. "Only got 'em after that chick stole your wedding band and threatened you." Woojin's eyes nearly popped out of his skull at the detail Jay casually mentioned as if it was a comment about the weather. "Yeah, luckily we had the rental when that happened. She tried following me after work that day."

"Why don't we have a restraining order on her again?" Your husband questioned as you sat next to him with your own serving, no longer paying attention to Ryul and Woojin for the moment. The aforementioned pair was watching you two talk as they took large bites of the homemade meal. "Because without it I get to work from home and she doesn't try to kill me for getting her fired." Jay made a sound of acknowledgement while trying to put some of his food into your portion, which was smaller due to you eating as you had been cooking.

"Okay so how did we never see the ring before that happened? Louis certainly should've seen it." Woojin's mind was coming up with a million questions to ask, but the food was too good to ask them all. "I never wear mine, it stays in a box with her engagement ring and the replacement band we got."

"So you just didn't have anything till the necklace?"

"No," Jay rolled up his sleeve to show delicate writing barely noticed prior to now. It was about a paragraph long with a date underneath it as well as your first initial. "I got Y/N's vows in her writing. No one questioned it cause they fit in with the rest of my tattoos." You carefully traced the words, smiling softly as you remembered the beautiful ceremony the two of you had designed.

Ryul watched you two interacted, answering Woojin's questions with little hesitation and confirming little details between each other. He watched how Jay leaned slightly against you, offering water or more food silently. How whenever you shifted, Jay would move with you seamlessly. Thinking back, Ryul connected the dots to the fact that his boss was in a relationship easily, but that was only clear now that you sat in front of him. The texts he would see Jay answer without hesitation, the calls that he never said anything about and vanished to take, the lock screen no one ever got a chance to pay attention to.

You finished your food and put the container back in the bag before curling against Jay as if it was second nature, everything was when it came to your husband.

"I still can't get over the fact that you're married and no one knows."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------- *Months later* ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Louis is already in the car, move faster before I leave all three of you!" You shouted through the Lngshot dorm, pissed off by their poor time management. "And that's not a threat, it's a promise!"

Ohyul and Louis had begged to meet you after Ryul and Woojin brought home food and stories from the day you showed up with lunch. From then on it became normal for you to appear on studio days and the occasional practice with food or small presents. Jay hadn't asked you to help with the boys since that day, you just took on the role without any of them realizing till you were taking Louis and Woojin to school and taking Ryul and Ohyul to the studio. You adapted into their lives without issue, making your work schedule fully at home in order to be available for the boys and Jay.

Louis was the only one that listened to you with little to no argument, the other three getting combative on occasion but letting it go when you gave a warning glare.

"We're coming! Sorry Y/N, I wasn't looking at the clock." Ohyul was practically shoving Woojin out the door as Ryul trails behind them, handing you a smoothie he made after Jay mentioned you had woken up late and didn't have time to eat before leaving the house. "Thank you for moving and thank you for the smoothie. Woojin, quit fighting and get down the stairs before I make you walk!" Your voice held gratitude for the two that were listening, shifting without issue to scold the youngest of the three boys in front of you as you all walked down the stairwell to your car.

"We had plenty of time! I didn't have to sprint through getting ready, plus it's just a studio day." Woojin's whining echoed through the lobby of the building, fixing the hoodie he had thrown on in the rush. "Yes it's a studio day but it's a new studio than you guys are used to and you're working with new producers Jay wanted input from. So, no you don't have plenty of time and I will not tolerate the back talk. Got it? Great now get in the goddamn car Jung Woojin." Ryul and Ohyul loaded into the car at hearing you lightly curse, both of them knowing your patience was thinning rapidly.

"No one asked for you to do this, Y/N. Quit nagging." Woojin mumbled as he climbed in following his friends, it did not escape your ears though. You shut the car door harshly, taking breaths to attempt to calm down while walking to the driver's seat.

The car ride was tense and silent, Ohyul not even attempting to turn on the stereo like usual. Your grip on the wheel was tight, frustration practically oozing from you as you pulled up to the building and parked to let the boys out of the car.

"Have a nice day. Call if you need anything." Your voice tight, words not holding the same warmth the boys were used to now. Woojin climbed out first, not saying anything in his own annoyance, Ryul and Louis following after saying good bye for the day. Ohyul stayed in the front seat, sympathy in his eyes. "Thank you for everything, I know Jay never asked for your help but it means a lot to us and him." He spoke in a gentle voice trying to easy the tension just a bit. "He didn't mean to be rude, I was pushing him to move all morning and I guess I pushed too far."

"It's fine, Ohyul. Go have a good day and I'll see if we can all go out to dinner later, okay?" The boy nodded, leaning over and hugging you softly as another thanks and apology is mumbled. He offers a smile as he exits the car, waiting for a small one to be returned from you. You take a deep breath once alone in the car, picking up the smoothie Ryul gave you from the cup holder and taking a drink. You take a moment to look at the building, "It's gonna be a good day. I refuse to let it not be." It's a quiet promise to yourself.

You put the car in drive, only to put it back in park as you see Jay walking to the car, a very disheveled looking Woojin in tow. You roll down your window, confused at whatever your husband was doing. He lightly pushed Woojin in front of himself, making sure he couldn't run away. "Apologize now." You knew that tone, it was the same tone Jay had used when speaking to your boss who had allowed your coworker to harass you.

"I'm sorry, Y/N." It was mumbled, Woojin's voice small as he bowed. "Louder. You don't get to disrespect my wife then mumble your way out of it."

"I'm very sorry, Y/N. I swear I'll never disrespect you again." He was much louder, maintaining the bow as he quieted once again. You sighed looking at your husband with an exasperated expression. "I forgive you," Woojin stood up straight, backing up as you get out of the car. "I wasn't mad, just frustrated. You're right, I wasn't asked to do everything I do for you guys, I do it because I care."

"I didn't realize how rude I've been and I'm really sorry. I'll be better, promise." He looked defeated, a child that had been scolded for his poor behavior and made to rectify the actions. You carefully wrapped him in a hug, smiling as he hugged back tightly. "It's alright, work hard today. Okay?" He nodded and ran back to the building after letting go of you. Your gaze turns to Jay, who looks much calmer than moments prior.

"Mr. Park, what fear did you put in him to make him come down and apologize like I was going to kill him?" You asked playfully, wrapping your arms around Jay's waist. "It was just a little fear, I reminded him I could be the one doing all the things you do for them. Also maybe told him that he would have to go to the gym with me and Ohyul again and every day for a week." Jay's arms wrapped around you easily, swaying the two of you slightly as he presses a few kisses to your head. You rest against him in silence for a few moments, more comfortable than you had been all morning.

"You sounded like a dad when you first walked down here, you know that right?"

"And you do realize you basically adopted the four of them right?" Jay stopped swaying and looked down at you with a knowing expression. "Yeah, I figured that out when Louis called me mom a few weeks ago. And he called you dad in the same sentence."

"When did that happen?"

Tour is always rough on Seungmo. He doesn't enjoy not being close to your for long amounts of time and 2 months was basically a nightmare for him. So rarely was he able to see you on a normal basis and being in a whole other country was practically hell for him.

This simple fact is how you ended up pinned against the wall by your front door at 1 am with your leg over Seungmo's shoulder as he feasted on you like he hadn't eaten in years.

"Missed you so fuckin' much." His voice muffled against your folds, his tongue lapping at your clit as his fingers massaged against your G-spot. Your moans were barely contained by the free hand you had, your other tightly wound tightly in his hair. "Seungmo~" Your legs shook as his fingers pressed harder, his other hand leaving finger prints along your thigh. His grip only tightened as you moaned his name once more, whining as if to beg for your rapidly approaching release.

Seungmo looked up at you, eyes shining with lust and adoration with every taste of your juices and movement of his fingers. Your walls spasmed as you whimpered, a knot tightly forming in your lower belly from pleasure. He knew exactly how to make you finish every time, and he always made sure you finished at least once before he even attempted to get to his own orgasm.

"Close, so close~" Your voice breathy as you lightly grind against his face. He moans softly against you, the vibration near enough to send you over the edge. The desperate whimper from the unintentional tease was all he needed to moan once more, lips closing around your clit and sucking lightly.

Your orgasm rips through your body like wildfire, legs shaking horrifically after the weeks of little to no relief without your boyfriend's touch. You forgo muffling your moans in order to pull Seungmo's hair with both hands. Your fingers gripping the soft locks in an attempt to ground yourself through the mind numbing pleasure. Seungmo stills his fingers and pulls them from your pussy, tongue already dancing over your labia to taste your release without a moment of hesitation.

Moments pass and you shakily take your leg off of his shoulder. You pull Seungmo up using the grip on his hair, crashing your lips against his once he's close enough. His hands find your hips lifting you to be able to wrap your legs around his waist. "Need you, need you so bad. Missed you so fucking much." Your words were whispered against his lips, your hands escaping his hair to shove his sweats down below his erection. "'m here baby," His voice grew low, lips finding your neck and leaving red marks in their wake as he trailed to the juncture of your neck and shoulder.

In the movement of his lips, he pressed the tip of his cock into you. The stretch and gentle marks drew a sharp inhale from your throat, your arms slung around his shoulders tightly. "Fuck~, feel you so good baby. You're so perfect." His words quiet against your skin, sinking into you slowly inch by inch, his mind finally finding peace in being as close as he can be to you once more. Your nails bit into his shoulders, reveling in the familiarity of your boyfriend's body after so long without him. Seungmo stilled as you took all of his cock, panting against the hickeys he left on your neck.

Tears gathered in your eyes as you held onto him as if he would fade away in an instant. The quiet of the apartment settled as you both stayed like that, neither of you wanting to ruin the moment. The tears spilled from your eyes as the scent of Seungmo's cologne invaded your nose. "I missed you so much, Mo." Your voice broke as you whispered to him, kissing his temple with the same softness he missed dearly. "Just wanted you here with me. Just wanted to be close to you."

"'m here. Fuck, I'm here my love." He spoke in a similar whisper, thumb tracing infinity signs on your hip. "I'll bring you with me next time. I can't be without you for that long again, Y/N." You clenched at hearing the desperation in your name being said. A groan pulled from his throat at the feeling, his hips rolling on instinct to follow the pleasure.

"Then fuck me till I can't imagine you leaving again."

It took so little for him to move his hands to your thighs, pulling back slightly and thrusting back into you without hesitation. "Anything you want, baby."

Seungmo's thrusts were fast, his hands tight on your thighs. He buried his face back against your neck to leave dark hickeys and bites to prove you were taken. You could barely breathe with each drag of his dick against your vaginal walls, your head spinning as your nails left scratches through his shirt. Tears streamed from your eyes, pleasure surrounding your psyche more than the relief of Seungmo finally being home had just 30 minutes before.

"M- more~" Words scrambled in your mind to try and verbalize what you needed in the moment. "Tell me what you want baby, gotta tell me what you want." Seungmo knew you couldn't say what you wanted, he knew you were far too drunk off his cock to think. "F- faster... Fuck, faster." You mustered the words through broken moans, your head falling against the wall behind you. Seungmo leaned in, kissing you with pure lust in his intentions.

His thrusts sped up, the rhythm becoming sloppy and uncoordinated as one of your hands finds your clit. You traced circles on the sensitive bud, moaning obscenely against Seungmo's kiss. It took so little for both of your orgasms to approach their zenith, the stimulation being almost too much. "Where d'ya want me?" He mumbled against your lips, knowing he wasn't going to last with the spasms from your walls.

"Inside." You gasped out the word, fingers speeding up on your clit as the whines excavated their way from your throat. "Cum inside me please." The thought crossed his mind for only a second before the orgasm crashed over him, your own following soon after. You whimpered at the warmth from Seungmo's release, limbs shaking as you clung to him without hesitation.

Jungwon - SMILING AND WAITING AT THE DOOR

You and your friends had watched Obsession a few days before Jungwon had a chance to see it. He was excited to come home and discuss the movie after him and Jay decided to see it together.

He forgot you would rather prank him than be nice after a horror movie that you recommended.

So there you stood; water on your shorts so it appeared that you had soiled yourself, oatmeal mixed to look like vomit smeared on your sweater and chin, our mascara smeared like tears as the same smile fake Nikki had adorned your features. The lights were off and you knew Jungwon was almost home, thus you stayed in your position.

When Jungwon opened the door to your shared apartment, the light from the hallway poured against your form and his eyes focused downward as he took his shoes off. "Baby? You home? That movie was insane. The cut from- AHHHH!" Mid-sentence, he looked up. His brain didn't quite register what he was seeing until he had already fallen backwards with the scream. You continued the tirade on Jungwon's psyche as you stepped forward with the same voice as Nikki. "Won! You're home! How was your day?"

"NO! Cut that shit out Y/N!" His breathing was heavy, hands shaking as you broke character, laughing like a mad woman at your boyfriend's panic. It took a few seconds for Jungwon to fully come to and stand back up.

He wasn't mad, just still shaken up from how easily you had scared him. "Don't do that again please."

Heeseung - RESTAURANT SCENE

Date night a week after seeing the movie was supposed to be normal. Heeseung thought the movie freaked you out enough to not have you prank him, so it was assumed dinner would be safe.

That was incorrect.

You had a sweater dress very similar to the sweater Nikki had worn during the dinner date scene, so you decided to wear it. Heeseung hadn't caught on to you behavior till about 20 minutes into dinner and he was asking questions he usually asked when date night looped around every week. "How is your dad doing? He seemed upset last time we called him."

Your lips drew to a tight smile, eyes hardening into almost dissociation. "No, no, no, no, no don't do that." Heeseung heard the first 'no' and his smile mirrored yours, fear evident in his eyes. His voice came out strained and matched your words. "No, no, no, no-" He cut himself off as he stood, sliding into the booth next to you and wrapping an arm around your waist.

"We were having such a nice date." You held character as Heeseung quickly kissed your temple and mumbled so only you could hear. "Baby, I love you so much but you are scaring me. What are you doing please stop. We're having such a nice time and I would never do anything to ruin it so please stop freaking me out, my love."

The desperation in his voice was enough to make you giggle, finally breaking character and turning your head to him. His fearful smile still there as you lean in and kiss his cheek softly. "Please don't do that again."

Jay - 'NOT ME' POLAROID

Going to the movie with Jungwon was the only way Jay was going to have time to see it before it eventually came out on streaming and by then it wasn't worth a date night in his mind. So he lugged himself to the movie theater with Jungwon and hoped you didn't decide to prank him that night.

He got lucky, you were already asleep when he got home. You had work early in the morning and he hated seeing you too tired for work. He double checked that the lunch he always packed for you was ready for when you left, before walking to the bedroom and pressing a kiss to your head before getting ready to sleep himself. Jay did not prepare himself for the possibility that your prank would come the next day while he was at practice.

Occasionally you would pack him a lunch for the day if you left for early meetings, today being one of those times. A small break in practice gave Jay a chance to eat, sitting in a small circle with the other members as he unpacks the lunch you made with care for him. Jungwon spotted the polaroid first, pausing as he points to the picture in the bottom of the bag. "What's that?"

Jay looked confused at where his friend was pointing, looking into the bottom of his lunch bag and pulling the pictures out. "Oh hell no." He dropped the pictures just as fast as he picked them up, mentally thanking the fact that he wasn't eating a sandwich. Jungwon picked up the photos, laughing. One photo was Jay sitting on the couch with 'YOU' written on the the bottom, the second was a picture of you staring at the camera creepily with 'NOT ME' written.

"I hate that she's on a different schedule than me," Jay mumbled as he texted you while eating. "I coulda just made my own lunch."

Jake - 'FLOWER POT'

You knew it would be easy to scare Jake after the movie. It disturbed him deeply and he claimed he would have nightmares for weeks afterwards. But with that, you still decided it was a fantastic idea to traumatize him further.

A few nights after you two had watched a movie, Jake was reading a book in bed as he waited for you to join him. He hadn't seen you grab the flower pot from the hallway and bring it to the bathroom. He didn't see you quietly practicing how Nikki had moved in the scene. He certainly didn't see you walk towards the bed, flower pot angled in your arms to cover your face in his perspective. "Love? It's getting late are you... What are you doing?" He finally looked up from the book, sight being met with the flower pot.

You didn't speak, feet moving almost independently from the rest of your body. Your movement was sudden an eerie, triggering Jake to shut his book and place it on the side table. "What's going on? Why do you have the flowers mum gave us when we moved in?" He smiled uneasily, his words causing you to move more erratically in his sight line so he can't even glimpse your face. "Okay, you're starting to scare me love. Let's just go to bed."

He reached for the pot and you jerked back as if something dragged you. The unnatural move caused him to jolt his hand back, eyes wide and full of panic. "Y/N what the fuck is going on?!" You moved the pot to show a creepy smile to your near cowering boyfriend, "Flowers for Sandy silly."

Your voice was saccharin, still moving in the same unnatural manner to get closer to Jake. Although the closer you got, the more he curled into himself and scooted away from you. "'Sandy'?! The fucking cat from the movie?! Why are you doing this?!"

You set the pot on the table next to his book, kneeling on the bed and taking his hands in your own. You would've kept going with the charade, till you felt Jake practically trembling under the slight touch you gave. You dropped the smile and kissed his hands like you always did when he was nervous. "I'm sorry baby, I didn't think that was gonna scare you as badly as it did." Your voice was no longer that light, vaguely terrifying sound, having returned it to your normal voice.

"No more horror movies." Jake pulled you against his chest once he realized you were done, "And if we do watch another one together I'm sleeping at the dorm."

Sunghoon - 'BACKWARDS WALK'

Sunghoon got dragged to watch the movie via you and his sister teaming up. He did not want to watch it, you and his sister did want him to watch it.

The movie did not scare him. It more-so made him want to vomit and kill his sister's boyfriend. The backwards walk scene was just about the only time he reacted with even a modicum of fear, so you and his sister decided to figure out how it can be done. This came to a head when you visited him at a late night practice, one he was alone during when you showed up.

"How the fuck am I supposed to get this? I'm so tired." The lights were low, Sunghoon sinking to the floor in front of the mirrors with his head in his hands. You walked closer to him, crouching in front of your frustrated boyfriend. "Can I give up? Be a stay at home husband? I feel like it would be easier."

"Hoon, if you're contemplating quitting the thing you love over some dance moves I think you need to sleep and eat a sandwich." He groaned as he looked at you, glaring playfully. You took that as your opportunity to quickly step backwards with your face contorted into a tortured expression. The sudden movement was enough to trigger the fear you wanted to try and see for the reaction.

Sunghoon scrambled to stand up and move away from you much like Bear had in the movie. "Holy shit!" The low lighting made your body become silhouetted in the 7 steps you took, it was eerie and caused his calm demeanor to fall in seconds. "What the fuck, Y/N?!" His heart was pounding, unsure if he should walk closer to you or stay where he was.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry baby. I'll stop, I won't hurt you." Your words and mimicking of Nikki's voice in the movie brought him out of his fear and into a relived sigh. He stood up straight, dropping his head back into his hands. "Okay, you're insane." You're laughter filled the room as you walked back to Sunghoon, wrapping your arms around his waist. "One; good job on the scare. Two; never do that again that was so much more terrifying that it was in the movie."

"I promise not to do it again if you get in the car so we can go home. Cause it's 1:30 in the morning and you look exhausted."

"Deal."

Sunoo - 'WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?'

Fresh out of the movie theater, you two sat in the car with Sunoo glancing over his shoulder at every little noise. It was too easy.

Sunoo hadn't let go of your hand the whole run time, or on the walk to the car, or this very moment. He kept a grip on you as if you would suddenly turn psychotic like fake Nikki had. Every few seconds he would glance at you to make sure you were still yourself, then back to the steering wheel as if it could erase the memory of what had happened on the big screen. He could hear you mumbling to yourself, tightening your hand in his before you snapped your head to Sunoo.

His eyes held your gaze, confused and anxiety filled with every second. "Honey? What's wrong?" His voice was quiet like always, a hint of terror in his words.

"Why don't you love me?!" You screamed the words with all your might, scaring Sunoo to his core. He screamed without reserve, yanking his hand back from yours as he pants and shakes from the sudden jump scare. "WHY?! Why would you do that?!" Your laughter fills the car, snorting slightly as you watch Sunoo freak out.

"Don't do that shit! You're so weird!"

"You picked me baby."

Ni-Ki - 'UNCANNY FACE IN THE CORNER'

Riki was also dragged to watch Obsession by you and his sisters teaming up. He wasn't scared by the way Nikki acted, just annoyed by Bear's existence and upset for how he treated Nikki. Riki attempted to prank you with a 'cat sandwich' after a few days of you two discussing the film. It only spurred your want to truly scare your boyfriend.

During his practices and long days in the studio, you spent time perfecting the uncanny valley makeup from the scene with Nikki crying in the corner. You called his sisters regularly, getting their feedback on the performance you intended to carry out against their brother. The hardest part would be escaping Riki's grip when he slept.

The night you finally decided to scare him, he had spent the day messing with you and teasing all day. All day, Riki had been pressing your nerves and trying to get in your head and you had had enough.

You hadn't drifted off by the time he was knocked out, arms tight around your body. You slowly began to pull out of his grip, moving slowly enough to not wake him. Every breath was fear inducing as you tried not to wake Riki as you wiggled out of bed. You knew the makeup wouldn't take long, you just had to be fast so Riki didn't wake up before you were in the corner. You stood in the corner after putting on the makeup, you waited and watched, knowing Riki would wake up from you not being in his grasp.

As Riki stirred, his hands moved around your side of the bed. "Y/N? Babe?" He sat up looking around the room and rubbing his eyes to try and find you. You stayed quiet, watching as Riki finds your form in the darkness. "Babe? What are you doing? Come back to bed." He didn't lay back, waking up more as he looks at your form. "Babe?"

You step out from the corner, mirroring the movements Nikki did. "I'm watching you sleep. You're cute when you sleep." Your words were fast and almost a whisper to mimic the way fake Nikki had spoke. "What the fuck? Just come back to bed babe." You stepped backwards into the corner faster than normal. "No, no," You used the flinch from Riki to continue. "I don't like my dreams." A horrible, exaggerated cry left your throat. The cry wakes Riki up fully, fear painted over his face as you emit sobs that match the initial cry. "I feel like you don't love me as much as I love you. Like the feeling's not mutual."

"Y/N what are you saying? You know I love you just come back to bed." Riki stood up from bed, walking towards you hesitantly. "WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!" Your scream made him fall back onto the floor, his mind finally registering your face appearing inhuman.

"What the fuck Y/N?!" His breathing was ragged, scrambling back away from you. "This isn't real, not real, not real. I'm having a nightmare, what the fuck, what the fuck." True panic was in Riki's voice as he shook on the floor, squeezing his eyes shut as an attempt to wake up from the nightmare. You broke character in seconds, wiping your face with the makeup wipe hidden in your hand as you kneel next to your now terrified boyfriend. You sit next to him leaning against him as you take the makeup off. "It's okay Riki, it's just some makeup and an act."

Her hand slammed the paper to the desk, a red 39 vaguely seen between her fingers. "How do I do it?"

"Do what?" Sunghoon didn't look up from his computer, not shocked by Chloe's reaction to the grade. "Get above an F on this paper." She near barked at her hybrid professor. Her stare as intense as she could make it as she stood in his office. Sunghoon sighed as he turned to the human standing before him.

"You already got a D minus on the last paper, that's above an F." The girl huffed in frustration, moving and pulling her folder for the creative literature and writing course. "I have re-written this paper four times, I do all of my work in this class to a minimum of a C plus, I have never struggled with any topics you have given me until this one. Please just tell me how to get a good grade on this stupid paper, professor." Sunghoon didn't seem fazed by Chloe's reaction, just watched her fumble for the other three versions of the paper. This was the one paper he allowed as many re-tries as his students were willing to do, so it wasn't the first time he's seen a student react like this.

This was the first time he wasn't able to get through to the student within the first three attempts. In Sunghoon's years of teaching college students, those that asked for help almost always had an example in their personal lives to relate the topic back to for reference.

But Chloe?

Chloe had no one to relate back to. Her parents were barely there, very few friends, no siblings— she was just alone. It's rather hard to create an essay or creative work on love when you're alone. "Chloe, you need-", Sunghoon paused, thinking about who the girl could possibly talk to in order to understand what he wanted written. She looked at him with desperation and hope, willing to think however needed in order to get a good grade. "Tomorrow after the physics lecture you have, I'll make sure you have an appointment with Professor Sim. I want you to interview him about this topic and write the essay you've been trying to write after that. Got it?"

"Yes! Oh my gosh, yes!" Chloe beamed, gathering up the papers and already thinking up all the questions she could appropriately ask her physics professor tomorrow. "Thank you so much professor! I won't let you down I swear." The girl practically tripped over her own feet on the way out of the office, mind moving faster than her own feet.

Sunghoon watched her leave, maintaining his stare at the door for a few minutes after before he grabbed his phone and began texting his friend. "I owe you for what I'm about to cause, Jake."

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Jake waited in his office after the lecture for Chloe. He knew what the topic was, just not how in depth she would go with her questions. "Professor Sim?" Chloe was practically vibrating with energy, nervous for the answers she will get.

The vampire looked up, smiling gently as he put his hand out to offer the seat across from his desk. "Come in Chloe, I was told you have a couple questions for me?"

"Yes," She seemed to buffer for a moment, having never been inside of Jake's office. No student had ever been inside. His office hours were just when he would still be in his classroom. The door to his office was covered in a cloth so you couldn't see inside while class was happening, he had never been seen leaving the room so everyone assumed he just never used it. "Yeah I- I need some help with Professor Park's assignment for the semester." Chloe's eyes drifted around the room, hand drawn pictures framed across the walls catching her attention with every movement of her sight. A poster of a band she hadn't heard of was closest to Jake's desk, his glasses on the corner in front of a picture facing the man. The chair across from him was near new, clearly barely used from lack of foot traffic in the room. Lego sets lined the top of the book case under his window, the shelves filled beyond capacity with books dating back over 100 years - part of his personal collection.

"Sorry for the mess," Jake's smile turned sheepish, hands adjusting the stacks of papers in front of him in a feeble attempt to tidy them. "I don't usually have anyone in here. But, what were your questions? I'm happy to help best I can."

Chloe refocused herself from staring around the room so delicately decorated for a man that never seeming to be inside of it. "Oh, yeah. Uh," She fumbled for a second with her notebook, flipping to the page she wrote the questions on and the corresponding page she saved for his answers. "Question one; Love is seen as an abstract unknown thing but we know it as a chemical reaction caused by oxytocin and dopamine along with a myriad of hormones, what is the vampire equivalent of this reaction?" Chloe looked up expectantly, only to see Jake's eyebrows furrowed together and his expression one of confusion.

"Chloe, love isn't just a chemical composition and mystery of biology." The girl paused, her questions becoming null and void with one sentence. "Try again, it might help." His voice was soft, eyes suddenly showing his true age. Her pen scratched at the page after flipping to a blank sheet, writing down the new first question.

"What- what is love to a vampire?" The words held a weight she didn't realize they would. Jake's confused look melted into one she couldn't read, his eyes finding one of the frames facing him. "Love to a vampire is... faulty." It was Chloe's turn to look at the man with confusion, her hand moving as she jots down his words. "Vampires are immortal so we have to find someone or something that will be with us for that immortal lifespan, or at least a majority of it. It creates a lot of faults and flaws that arise as time passes and as the mind ages."

She nodded, creating new questions as she listens. "No being has an unlimited memory, so is there a possibility you would forget that love?"

"If the person or thing isn't with you, yes." Jake's smile diminished, eyes moving as if searching for something on the desk and in the pictures. "I find my own memories of love fading as time goes. I couldn't even tell you what year it was when I met my wife."

Her head snapped up, "You're married?"

"Yeah, have been for the last 112 years." His smile returned, sadder than before, but still a smile. He moved the silvery chain around his neck to lay over his shirt, two gold rings resting at the bottom. "For her its about the human equivalent of 15 years, but that's more a guess than anything."

"So you're married to an elf? I thought they had hierarchies and systems that other creatures weren't allowed to view? They have basically a separate city and world from the rest of us because of their beliefs and actions." Chloe's hand moved near as fast as her mind in scratching down new questions along with Jake's answer. "Have you not paid attention in history? It wasn't always like this." She stopped once more, trying to think about a time she was taught that elves and all the other creatures lived amongst each other.

"I was human when everyone lived together." Jake leaned back in his chair, fiddling with his necklace as he spoke fondly. "I don't remember the year. But I was 24, walking to the market with my friend. Elves had stalls with the gnomes and the fae. It was so quiet then..." His voice trailed off in order to give Chloe a moment to catch up and ask more. "Did you meet her as a human or were you already turned?"

"It was the night I was turned, actually." He stopped fiddling, eyes fixed on the ceiling as the faint bite scar on his shoulder began to itch from remembering. "My friend had gone home early and I stayed for a small show the dragons wanted to put on after the market closed. Before the show a vampire grabbed me and dragged me to the woods, he wanted to kill me I think." Jake's voice got tight, hands resuming their movement to prevent the tears in his eyes. "It was too late for me to stay human by the time her arrow hit the vampire. I was already mostly turned, so she stayed by my side until it stopped hurting."

"What's her name?"

"Y/N," Chloe could hear the pain behind saying the woman's name. The girl wondered if she should stop, if she had enough for her essay. She went silent as her next question died in her throat. "Her name is- was -Y/N."

"Was?" Her voice was quiet, eyes focused on the two rings in her professor's hands as he sat back to look at the pictures on his desk. "Yeah..."

It was the only word he could muster in the moment, tears threatening to fall as he traced the engravings on the smaller of the two rings. Jake's eyes stayed on the picture closest to his computer, Y/N's voice echoing in his memory. The girl across from him couldn't find the words to continue, her professor's grief seeming so recent. To her it wasn't recent, but to Jake it was as if yesterday it had happened.

An eternity could pass and it would still be fresh wound in his heart.

Jake swallowed, taking a breath to regain composure as his eyes stayed locked to the picture. "'Till i ilúve ends'," The words sounded so foreign coming from a vampire. "'Till the universe ends', it was the first thing she taught me in quenya. It's what we got engraved on our rings when we finally got married." Chloe stopped writing, sympathy drawn deep within her features as she listened. Jake's tears began to fall without his expression altering, the sadness etched so deep in his psyche he could fight them even if he tried. "When a vampire loves someone, they love that person with every fiber of themselves. Our hearts and minds crave that person more than blood or power. That's why we have to find someone without life span or at least similar."

"We aren't swans, we don't mate for life." HIs voice broke, hands clasping around the gold in a silent prayer. "We just love with all we are and all we ever will be because what is an eternal existence without someone who you can bare your soul and mind to without fear of hatred or- or prejudice." Chloe's own tears began to form, finally mustering her voice loud enough to ask another question.

"How did she die?" She knew it was too far, the question was too deep of a cut for the man reliving his grief all over again from simple questions about a topic she had never imagined would carry so much pain. But she wanted to know why the man she had always seen smile was so broken.

"We were walking to a movie she wanted to see." It was like yesterday, his body suddenly feeling back in that night. He could feel her hand against his own; warm and steady. Y/N's voice rambled with excitement for their weekly date night and finally getting to see the movie she had heard her coworker rave about. "It was date night for us, she was so excited. I had gotten my certification to be a teacher the day before and she had gotten promoted." Jake could feel the summer night against his arms again. His jacket loose over her shoulders because she got cold easier, the same jacket he used to try and stop the bleeding after they were attacked. "I needed to be faster, but I thought she would be able to hold her own. She could always hold her own."

Jake's hands fell from their prayer like position, the rings falling against his chest once more as he stared at his own hands with a hatred only shown in stories from Chloe's childhood. "We were grabbed by some people that knew she was an elf. It was right around the time that elves isolated themselves to stop their people getting taken for their blood and it being sold on the black market." Jake could feel Y/N's blood dripping through his fingers, the jacket soaked through as her breathing rattled through her chest. Every second was precious and Jake wasn't fast enough that night. He could hear her final words in his ears for the first time in years; a promise that she made with they first began courting one another. "Elven blood shimmers, it has the ability to slow aging and when the elves closed themselves in- whoever was left in the streets were basically left for dead."

"They left my Y/N for dead..." Resentment dripped from Jake's lips, his tears falling without resistance. His voice shook, but never broke. Chloe's tears fell after she withheld them, her very core stricken with sympathy for Jake. She understood what Sunghoon wanted her to write.

She understood how love wasn't clinical and easily boiled down to a misfire of neurons creating chemicals. Love was everything and nothing. It was the very thing that kept Jake there after Y/N's death, it was the reason her few friends stayed with her, it was the reason for her drive to do better in school.

"Would you change anything if it meant she would still be here?"

Jake smiled as he remembered every moment he could conjure in his mind. Every second with Y/N that he cherished flooding the sight of her dying against him. "No, Chloe. I wouldn't change a single thing I did because if I changed even one decision I wouldn't have had the moments I cherish. Even if it meant reliving that night, I would still do it all over again because I would never want to love her any other way than I had."

"Thank you, professor. I- I think this is the most I've ever learned." She swallowed, wiping her eyes as she stood from the chair, deciding she needed to leave the vampire alone. Her footsteps echoed in Jake's ears as Chloe walked to the door, pausing and turning back. One question echoed in her mind, one she had seen online when she began researching for the paper that brought her to this office. "What would you give up to hear Y/N again?"

"As you boys have grown as artists and people, do you look back at before you debuted and wonder what you could've done differently?" The interviewer's eyes swept the four sitting in front of her, expecting answers she heard a million times before from artists that didn't seem to know how to be human. "Well," Louis started his words less sure than he had hoped he sounded, "We all made mistakes before being in the public eye and I personally look back and wonder if I could've done more to grow as a dancer and in my production skills."

Ohyul nodded, sharing a similar sentiment about his vocal skills still having felt rudimentary at their debut. "Looking back, my voice didn't match the ability I think I needed to show at the time in order to also compete with such an intense and demanding industry. I wonder a lot what would've happened if I had shown what I can truly do back then." Woojin and Ryul stayed quiet for a moment, the interviewer nodding at Ohyul and Louis's answers. "So everyone in the group seems to just have wanted to be at a higher skill level when you had initially debuted? That's great and shows your dedication to your craft and what you want to show your fans on a consistent basis."

The question lingered in Ryul's mind, every mistake he wished he could take back during his training days flooding his cognition. He minorly participated in the rest of the interview, mind too filled to try and participate properly. Even as the cameras shut off he couldn't seem to focus.

Ohyul stopped Ryul as the younger two walked to the car and the room cleared out after filming was done; the hand on Ryul's shoulder matching the gaze of knowing Ohyul held. "You need to stop thinking about it."

"I'm not- I'm not thinking about anything. Just- I'm just tired."

"'Tired' my ass." Ohyul lightly shook his friend, forcing Ryul to look at him. "You're thinking about her. You're thinking about what could've been done differently to not watch her walk away. You've been thinking about it since she asked what we could've done differently." Ryul's eyes seemed to age in the moments Ohyul spoke; his mind racing a million miles a second with what he could've done to keep you in his life outside of memories and silent hopes that you would forgive him for pushing you away.

"You know you pushed her away. You know how badly you fucked up." Ryul nodded, stepping away from Ohyul as if to avoid the scolding. He couldn't speak to defend himself; the pain from the day he realized how far he pushed you fresh in his chest. "You know what you should've done, Ryul. You can't go back and fix it just cause you're in the spotlight now. Too much is riding on your shoulders to also maintain her safety from this even if you can fix it."

"I know!" Ryul snapped, glaring at his friend as he shoves him away. "I know..." Tears pricked his eyes, voice shaking just barely. "I can't fix it. I can't fix any of it but I wanna try because I miss the weird phone calls and the- the stupid memories. I miss the fights and the anger and the love and care - I miss every part of what we had." Ohyul hadn't seen this side of Ryul.

No one had seen that side; except you.

And even now, Ryul missed the fights that would bring you both to this point. "I can't do this without her." Ohyul watched as his friend's tears fell, ruining the makeup from the shoot and staff steered away from the room with every word from Ryul's heart break.

Eventually, their time in the dressing room is cut, staff from the interviewer's company shooing the boys out. "Come on, we'll finish talking about this at home." Ohyul's hand meets Ryul's shoulder once more, guiding him to the car.

As Ryul sits in the car and they begin to move, his hand found his phone. No one spoke on the drive home; Louis napped, Ohyul stared at the passing city, Woojin played on his phone, and Ryul finally hit send on a message he had written out the night you left. His eyes lingered on the screen before locking the phone and leaning his head back to stare at the ceiling of the vehicle. His mind wandered to the nights you helped him sneak out of the dorm, you both running as fast as you could to reach the last bus towards the countryside so you could gaze at the sky without the lights.

The ride home seemed to last forever, Ryul not fully knowing if the message even reached your phone. That was until the car stopped and he and the others began to climb out that his phone buzzed in his back pocket.

"N- no..." Your voice small and muffled against Jay's hoodie, sobs reducing with every moment passing in his arms. "Just- Just assholes who can't keep to themselves." Swallowing was a chore as the words tumbled out between sniffles. It wasn't hard to piece together that your coworkers figured out who you were with – not like you two hid it, you just kept to yourselves. You could feel your husband place his lips against your head, his hand smoothing out your hair as he does so. "'s alright baby. Doesn't matter now." His voice was muffled, rocking slowly in order to soothe your tears.

It didn't take more than a few minutes for Jay to lift you into his arms, moving the both of you to the couch so you were still in his lap. The movement and tight grip helping to reduce your sobbing near entirely, tears slowing with the help of a few more kisses pressed to your hairline. "What happened to make you cry my love?" Jay didn't dare raise his voice, knowing your mental state was still fragile.

You swallowed, shifting to straddle Jay in order to slip your hands under his hoodie as you bury your head into the crook of his neck once more. "The last few days have sucked and today when you called I stepped away to answer, I didn't think anyone would follow me cause no one cares when literally anyone else in the office answers a phone call after saying 'My partner is calling, I'll be right back.'" Your hands trace to Jay's back, gently running your nails over his skin as you regal what had caused the break down. Jay's hands found home under your shirt, resting on your waist in a tight hold. "Apparently someone followed me or eavesdropped or something and heard me ask for the money to take the boys dinner, but they completely missed when I told you it was for them. I went back after the call and ordering the delivery for them and every one of my coworkers was looking at me like I was insane."

Jay made quiet noises of understanding as you spoke, his fingers slowly mimicking the shapes you traced on his back. Your tears began to fall again, pressing kisses against Jay's shoulder as a way to assure yourself that he was with you.

"Before my last meeting, one of them cornered me." Your voice broke and Jay's slow tracing halted, opting for one hand to leave your skin and cradle your head once more. "She said I was lying about being married and- and was selling myself to you for money. She pulled my ring off and stole it and called me a- a 'good for nothing whore'." Your chest was tight, tears falling rapidly against Jay as you pulled your left hand away from his waist to show your lightly bruised ring finger and wrist. His hand left the back of your head, meeting your wrist in a soft hold. His eyes traced the bruising as well as the slight tan line you acquired on your finger from the wedding band.

"You know, maybe its a good thing we waited to get your engagement ring attached so they're just one." Jay's mouth moved before his mind could stop the words, his voice pulling you to loom at him fully. "Our procrastination of not wanting to deal with the jeweler's just saved one of your rings." He looked at you with an expression that drew a giggle from your throat.

"She still stole the ring you had made and called me stupid shit." Your tears began to dry once again, a smile fighting to paint your lips. "She's a dumbass who probably hasn't had good dick ever," You laugh at Jay's remark; the smile finally winning as you do so. "And as for the ring? I can get a new one made. I still have the original design and we can finally get the two connected like you wanted." His smile never faded as Jay kissed the tan line on your finger, intertwining your hand with his as he does so.

"It's just a ring baby, I care more about you being here with me than I ever could about the ring or not." You leaned forward, capturing Jay's lips against your own, your hand escaping from under his hoodie to his hair. Your finger thread through his locks, your intertwined hands tightening with every quiet giggle you exchange.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You didn't have an actual conversation with your girlfriend for 6 months?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Yudai paced the living room of you and Maki's apartment, the rest of the group standing around their friend who sat on the couch. In Maki's grasp was the hoodie you would steal; it still had your perfume lingering within the fibers. "She called me to make sure you weren't cheating and you repay that fear with not talking to her for 6 fucking months?!"

Tears streaked from Maki's eyes, unable to speak as he tries to find his mind's rationalization for his actions. Yudai never looked away from him, the rest of the group never meeting Maki's eyes but never joining in Yudai's aggression. "I- I wasn't-" The words wouldn't form, lodged next to a sob in Maki's throat as a small part of his brain begged for you to be kidding and be hiding at a friend's house for a few days till he learned his lesson. "You weren't what?! Paying attention? Cause that's clear as fucking day! How do you even go 6 months without talking to the girl you claim you love?! You didn't text her or call her? Not once in that whole time frame did you think 'Huh, I haven't heard Y/N's voice in a while, I should call her and make sure she's okay.'?!"

Yudai stopped pacing, glaring at Maki with all he could muster through the rage. Nicholas had gotten ahold of Maki's phone in the time since finding the note, it wasn't hard to open it, the password was your birthday. He was scrolling through messages from the last 6 months, seeing a pattern with each message. "Dude, you shut her down every time she tried to talk about what was happening." Fuma stepped closer, reading what he could from the screen as Nicholas read the texts for the group. "She asked back when you started staying at the dorms more 'Can we talk over dinner? I feel like you're pulling away'. You responded 3 hours later 'Sorry can't, I'm going out with Jo and some staff'. Month later you sent 'Why were you asking K if I was cheating? Do you think I'm really that much of an asshole?', she texted back basically immediately 'No I don't, you wont talk to me and it's hard to not be worried. Can you please come home so we can talk?'"

"That was the night we argued." Maki's eyes locked to the hoodie, remembering every second of that night. "I came home late, she was sitting at the table. I- I didn't even let her say anything- fuck, I'm such an idiot." Yudai stepped forward, voice no longer holding anger, but a deadly calm instead. "What did you say to Y/N?"

"I yelled. I just started yelling." Sobs broke from Maki's chest, pouring the memory out through his words. "I said she was being insane and controlling and- and that she needed to get a life outside of me. I wasn't thinking and I- I was angry that she even thought for a second that I wasn't loyal. She yelled back, saying I was overreacting and I wasn't being reasonable and she was right." The hoodie was clutched to his chest, practically pleading for this to be fake in his head. He wanted the cameras to show themselves, for you to see just how broken his heart was and come back so he could fix everything. "Fuck she was right."

Against his mind screaming to pack up every last item of yours in the apartment, Yudai walked closer to Maki and wrapped his arms around him. A deep sigh, coated with annoyance, blows from Yudai's nose. "The moment she is back in this apartment, you better grovel like your life depends on it because right now your relationship and any respect I have for you does."

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One month.

You were gone for one month. YX put out a statement, placing Maki on a temporary hiatus after seeing the tension that showed on camera. Everyday your parents watched you slowly spiral, hiding away as best you could as you quietly wanted Riki's hoodie and for everything to just go back to normal- to a time before he pulled away. Nicholas texted and called whenever he could, trying his hardest to convince you to unblock Riki or to just listen to his apology.

You thought you would be alright when you left. Riki hadn't seemed to care about you so why would it hurt to leave?

You weren't alright. Every day you stared at Riki's contact in your blocked list every single day, the picture of him laughing with ice cream on his face mocking you. Every reminder on your phone and the TV brought an ache to your heart.

Even now, standing in front of the apartment door you once knew as a sanctuary of love and adoration, your soul felt heavy. Your heart yearned for Riki to be home; waiting for you with the soft smile you fell in love with in the first place, a promise for that love to never fade waiting on his tongue.

Pushing the door open felt as though you were pushing a boulder, fear building as you saw the light on. Your breath hitched, the door fully opening to see what could only be hundreds of your favorite flowers. The living room walls almost covered in colors you adored, those same colors seen down the hall and slightly into the kitchen as well. "Holy shit..." Your disbelief was heard through the quiet apartment.

Your eyes were so focused on the flowers and various polaroid photos Riki had taken of your dates and other activities you two had done in the time together. You didn't see the man until your eyes reached the dining room. Riki stood by the table, eyes bloodshot as he stared in that same disbelief. "You're home." It was a statement near whispered, Riki's voice hoarse from cries and begging to any god he could think of for you to return. His hair was stuck up at odd angles, dark circles under his tired eyes, frame unnoticeably smaller, but you could tell.

You could always tell.

"Riki-" You tried to speak, your own eyes reddening as you opened your mouth. The words you mentally prepared on the flight failed you as Riki's arms encircled your body, pulling you tight against his own. "I'm so sorry. Fuck, I'm sorry Y/N." His voice was tighter than his grip, tears hitting your shoulder within seconds, "I was an idiot and you suffered cause I can't keep my actions in check. I love you and I- I can't even believe I did this."

You couldn't stop yourself from leaning into his hold, wrapping your arms around Riki's waist. The movement stopped his near frantic apologies; you knew you could make him quiet with something small.

"Who am I to you?" Your question stopped Riki's breath, his hand coming to rest against your cheek so he could look you in the eyes. His gaze held pain and fear, but still had the same love and adoration you craved.

"You're my everything." Riki said it as a fact, one he decided would be true throughout anything life could throw at your relationship. "I swear on everything possible that I will never let you feel like you did." Your eyes watered once more, months of built up worry dissolving in moments. "Never again?" A gentle waver reached Riki's ears as a tear fell from your eye.

"Ah shit," Clattering from Keeho's phone sounded out as you cussed and the picture flipped around till your phone smacked onto the ground.

"If you drop me one more time I'm hanging up woman."

"Then do it, you always threaten to but never do." You laughed slightly, grabbing your phone and bringing it back up to show your face. The sight was everything Keeho adored every time he answered the facetime without proper hesitation. He loved answering and seeing whatever odd thing you wanted to show him, it always made the distance between you two seem less daunting.

"Bet." Keeho hit end on the call, knowing you would call right back. Although it took longer than he expected. It took 20 minutes for you to call back, your boyfriend nodding off as he answers, but that didn't last long. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Existing." You stated with a matter of fact tone. You sat typing away on your computer, not bringing attention to the bizarre attire you now adorned. Your hair was covered in foam, sticking up in 3 large spikes like a mohawk. You weren't wearing a proper shirt, instead opting for a backwards dress shirt with a bowtie while also wearing pajama pants he recognized from when you stole them on his last visit. "That is not existing, that's a whole bunch of what the fuck."

"How so darling?" You were fighting a smile as you felt one of the spikes fall, the bowtie slowly coming unclipped as it fell and hit your back. "'Darling'? That's a new pet name. Is it specifically for this look or will it be staying?" Keeho could see you breaking character slowly, quickly contorting his position in bed to mimic a male bird attempting to get a female's attention. "Might stay. Depends if I decide to stay like this." Your voice cracked as you finally looked back to your phone. A laugh tore from your chest as Keeho waved his arms like an idiot, his own giggles matching your laughs almost immediately.

The two of you laughed till Keeho flopped back down onto his bed and your hair fell down fully. Your laughs turned to coughing as your boyfriend hit his pillow like a rock; his own laughs dying down as a pillow is thrown from his roommate. "Sorry, sorry, I'll be quiet." His breathing was heavy, a large smile plastered over his lips.

"Okay, next time you facetime me I need you to not be doing something stupid." You shake your head panting as you're smile matches Keeho's. "Nope, you love my stupidity too much."

Droplets raced down the window, reflecting in the street lights as you watched the rain. Your heart was heavy, the suitcase you packed days ago mocking you from the hall closet. It called out for you, urging you to get on the next flight to your parents home and leave Riki in the dark about everything. It called as a siren's song to force Riki to see how little he seemed to care. You hadn't been able to bring yourself to leave—not yet at least.

Every day passed and he seemed to become more and more distant, pulling away any time he had the day off so he could be alone and the moment he would get home he would be in his own little world.

A world seeming to be devoid of you.

Your eyes tear away from the window, looking around the apartment you once knew as a sanctuary for you and Riki. It was a place he didn't have to be anything but yours, but months of him brushing your attempts at communication away had made it seem like he wasn't even that. You initially feared he was cheating, but confirmation from Yudai of where Riki had been held that theory. After the confirmation he picked a fight, claiming you didn't trust him or his friends. It had been the first time he actually spoke you in a month by that point.

After that night, he wasn't home. Riki would stay at the dorm or be out until he had practice the next day. Your only solace was seeing him on variety shows and interviews, smiling more than he had at home since before the argument.

Four months had passed without properly talking to your boyfriend. As you looked around that time finally weighed on your soul, tears finally falling from where they gathered in your eyes. You slowly pulled your phone from the pocket of Riki's hoodie you stole to sleep in when you first moved, he used to love seeing you walk around in it after you got home from work. You didn't think about the price as you booked a ticket for the first flight back to your parents, pulling the suitcase from the closet as you do so.

You looked down at the hoodie, opting to pull it off and fold it on the dining table. "I can't do this anymore." Your voice hoarse as you mumble to yourself, placing a note you wrote when you packed the suitcase, onto the hoodie as a guarantee Riki would see it. You sigh, walking to the door with the bag and your heart broken.

"Maybe he'll wake up from whatever this is..."

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"Are you sure Y/N is okay with you being gone so much? She hasn't said anything about it in a few months." Nicholas tagged along with Maki to get some clothes from the apartment, worried because you hadn't been following Maki to hang outs with the rest of the group. You hadn't seemed to exist for the last 6 months and he was worried.

"She hasn't yelled at me about it so it's gotta be fine." Maki didn't seem worried, not having even seen how far away you had drifted. "Plus even if she wasn't okay with it, I doubt she would say anything. She told me few weeks ago she wanted more alone time."

The door clicked open, revealing a near staged apartment. Nothing out of place and dark. Maki flipped the light switch, his eyes finding the hoodie without hesitation. "Y/N? Baby?" For the first time in months Maki called out your name, a deep fear pooling in his stomach when met with silence. "Where is she?" Nicholas's eyes were centered on the note as his friend began looking around the apartment for you. "Y/N? C'mon this isn't funny. I know I haven't been home but this is fucked up."

"Dude." Maki followed Nicholas' voice, snatching the now open note as he saw his friend holding the paper. Maki's eyes frantically read through the words, his throat tightening as tears gather.

"Riki, I can't do this anymore. I love you and I won't stop, but it hurts me to stay here when all I have anymore is silence." Maki's voice held the tone of a whisper, as if saying the note any louder would make it too real. "I'll be somewhere safe and I'll be back in a few weeks to get the rest of my stuff. Until then don't worry about the apartment, I'll break the lease after I get everything I need. I'll tell the guys everything when I come back." Nicholas took the paper back as Maki stubbled over his words, disbelief fogging his vision.

Nicholas finishes reading the note, reading the last lines with anger in his voice. "Just think about how you've acted and decide where I fit in your life. I'm supposed to be your partner, never thought I would have to ask who I was to the one person I could lean on. Goodbye Riki."

"I- I didn't-" Maki couldn't form a coherent thought, sinking to his knees on the dining room floor. His stomach in knots and his body like lead as your words echo in his mind.

"Maki, what did you do?" Nicholas stepped slightly away from Riki, glaring unintentionally at the younger man on the ground.

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