Marrr

Rascvjetalost života Talasa okvire moga bićaA jedna tanana duša Spava u kolevci oka mogVolje i nevolje vezu Po stranicama svega Što sam govorila, govorim i govorit ćuSmijemo li se junačitiReci mi vjetre novog dana

If I took you through my heartOn tour dear strangerIt would still be full of loveCarefully decorated for agesAnd still happy, hopefully healthy Still beating, keeping me alive and wellBut it would be a lie And i would not try to hide itThat all these four rooms Have known for agesIt’s own epistemeThat this was a home of someoneWho was very dear to me

Feels like the end of me cameAnd all the rivers in the worldWould not be able to wash meAnd I would so love it if they wouldWash me away, carry me to depthsTo the oceans, far, far awaySome hidden and unknown depthsWhere sea beasts can eat me alive

Even if never understoodAll the misteries of the UniverseWe would still knowThat the only mistery we truly understandYet never can explain wordsIs the mistery of ourselvesAnd those we connect withMagicallyAnd saying good byeMeans saying goodbyeTo the part of our beingBut staying lovingInfinitely loving.

I was never the one to write the love songAnd nothing i ever say, no matter longWould ever be able to describe All the feelings inside And the core that hurtsLoves and hurts and existsWith wishes pureYet constrained and undignifiedWhen it would cross the line It would forever stay on the other side

The leaves grew green againChange their cycles Vivid picteresque of a new life Birds would sing their songAnd i have none Because I dedicated them all to you

And then…I couldn’t go on. My own strength betrayed me,I finally couldn’t unsee What I could not seeBeforeAnd the world was silent that dayMy mind was emptyFor where I stood onceI couldn’t stand anymoreMy place was gone.

And you will never know The way my soul screamed That day I leftYou will never hear The howl of my beingEating it’s core For having to go…Having to go Next step without you And betraying my own selfLaying togetherCheek to cheekBut unawareThe pain, the horrorThe unavoidable pitDeep, deep withinNot being able to go back To the way everything wasAnd it was beautifulIt will always be beautiful.

Uzmi i ovo malo duše Što mi je preostalo I pojedi je cijelu! Ni tada ti biti dosta neće, Neutoljivo je i nepreglednoDno trbuha tvog. Slijepo i opijeno, Previše željno, Pohlepno, Gutaš sve pred sobom, U mraku sopstvene grozoteBez kontrole, Bez straha, Jedino važno je Više, svega što više, više… Mene nema beskonačno.Krhke su i slabe kosti mojeI nemam kuda pobjeći. U kom god smjeru krenula,Stići ćeš…

I’m justSitting down my friendAll alone, with myselfRemembering all the times I was evil,Disasterous, disgraceful, deceitfulDumb, and dead inside.There is no payment for playing this partHardly doubt it we could call it artAnd no one can go backwards reallyIt is what it is for nowWho’s to blameIrrelevant at this pointThis child is already in my handsStill formative, developing, growingAnd there…

End is what haunts me…Glory of every day Hidden behind the shadow Of what we know must happen,What will inevitably happen…The time will come,Dawn is but a mere illusion,Freshness comes, but goes fast.Carpe diem, carpe diem, carpe diem…To what result I ask youWhoever you areTo what result to seize the dayOccupy, capture, gainTo what result can you takeSomething that can never be yoursTo what…

Useljeni nemir i rasejanost dugo su stanariU bivstvu momeI ne prestaju se kotiti kao stotine kurua.Težina tog tereta, slama moja leđa I misli koje ne slute niti jednu lekciju iza,Slepo čekaju kakvu kišu koja bi spralaSve ove izgubljene trenutke i snoveZakon kruženja u prirodi diktira svoje,Tuga menja oblik i nalazi večni dom u biću momPomera klatno ka novom poglavlju.A onda je prelazak ulice…

Sati dolaze i prolazeKao i ljudi na cestiUvjeti njihovi nisu mi poznatiCjenik njihovih uslugaOdveć je preskupZa sve nas sa pogreškamaZa sve nas sa slomljenim svjetovima… Svjetlucave kapi kiše Uljepšavaju puknute cesteI nikada nećemo znatiKo sve hodi njimaNi što se u tim ljudima nalazi Nudi li njihova nutrina nešto Ili smo ipak svi prazni.

Sudden intensification of drops woke me up. It was raining and I slept really well. There was not a single sign that they will stopAnd i just watched them in awe as they fell. There were no feelings, no thoughts for a moment,Just a silent watch, mute enjoyment and being,Puryfing my deep and unresolved wish for atonementAs if it was the world’s most important thing. I realized, I don’t want to…

U kojem sam času uvidela Da jedna ja drema dubokim snom, Prepušta se prostranstvu sveta I buši opne svoga bića Sada već razlivene Po dalekim prostranstvima U biće ulaze bitke, snovi, nadanja, proviđenja, Poneka topla reč, ali premalo deljenja, previše htenja. Pokušaj buđenja i smiraja uzaludan je, jalov, bedan, Dok borim se za udah smisla, makar jedan. E moja čovječice mala Nisi rođena…

there comes a time in life when everything that seemed clear becomes a memory from a past life suddenly, everything you know has been destroyed  and you don’t even know yourself who you really are or what’s real anyway not sure if you have a will to forge a new path  or whatever should be a good replacement or whatever should be there  where once strong convictions stood it is unclear…

I am tired of all the thingsI thought I had to do,That they had to be done. Started to resent themOne by oneIn their meaningless urgencyOnly to discoverThere was nothing to themAt all.