what's the password?

it took me awhile to find the words to summarize perverts, not because it’s lyrically or sonically complex, but because it’s an album that holds up a mirror to the listener and offers no distraction from the reflected image, however painful, however discomforting. it’s drenched in “perversions” of sound: the echoing reverb, crunchy distortions, down-pitched samples - and the slow pace & long track lengths make it as excruciating as it is exquisite. 

on the surface, perverts is a dark, ambient exploration of themes of shame, suffering, fear, and isolation, seemingly in direct contrast with how hayden herself describes this project: erotic, meditative, and deeply euphoric. if we suspend our own shame, fear & disbelief to acknowledge that some part of us finds suffering highly erotic and enjoyable, experiencing pain is not always a choice but suffering is, and that it’s possible to transmute all kinds of unwanted suffering into pleasure, it’s not such a stretch to understanding hayden’s experience of the album. 

track: amber waves

time: 11:32

recording of prescription instructions, couldn't figure out which movie they're quoted from

soft guitar, soft vocals

"the devil i know is the devil i want"

"i still kick rocks when the walking is good"

track: etienne + thatorchia

time: 8:43, 7:24

these two tracks demanded to be felt rather than dissected or explained

track: pulldrone

time: 15:14

12 stages of simulacrum

sound bowl

10 minutes alone with your thoughts

track: onanist

time: 6:24

the memory of a piano melody

echoing vocals

roaring guitar distortion

a supplication, after being lost for so long we long to be found

"it feels good" sounds both ecstatic and weak, like after you've been wrung out by an experience of pleasure so strong it might kill you

track: vacillator

time: 7:44

soothing vocals, slow, steady drumbeat

a reassurance with a caveat, a hungry lover, a promise

the melody stops, the drums decay, the wind blows, where did you go during the interlude?

"if you love me keep it to yourself", the words bear repeating

track: housofpsychoticwomn

time: 13:35

pulldrone + guitar

i can't tell you what the sound actually is but it sounds like the blood beating in your eardrums when you're in pain

death rattle

evil bass

track: punish

time: 6:47

the creaking of your backyard swingset pitched down, maybe you were innocent once, but that's not how they'll picture you now

"i am punished by love"

reference to Gary Plauché - i'll let you google him yourself with a TW for CSA

track: perverts

time: 12:04

opens with distorted gramophone-esque recording of "nearer my god to thee"

i can hear the emf noises

oppressive rumble building up, panning

someone(thing) breathing in the room with you

"heaven has forsaken the masturbator"

alarm tone, distant tornado siren

"no one you know is a good person"

"it's happening to everybody"

bare mans

i wasn’t feeling a full song-by-song breakdown for this one but as a lover of future noir, layered jazz compositions, soulful vocals, and dubstep, Finest Hour does have pretty much everything i could want.

i think i can probably credit this album for getting me into breakbeat, but the journey through bebop, neo soul, grime, reggae, trip hop, and electronic influences makes you feel like you’re taking an insomniac wander into the underbelly of a beast of a city. from alley to alley no one pays you any mind, you don’t speak to anyone, but eventually you find a rooftop to watch the sunrise from at the end of the night. 

there’s an undercurrent of longing that rises to the surface on the more melodic tracks like Angel Eyes, Hymn for Him, and All Yours, but the grimier Back Chat and Pop and Lock keep you from letting your guard down completely (not every neighbourhood is a “good” neighbourhood). i would kill to smoke a cigarette and listen to Pop and Lock while driving on a dark highway in August.

i feel like Finest Hour could have been perfectly at home in the soundtrack of Cowboy Bebop if the timing had worked out. i found it the year i moved back to the city and then almost forgot about it until i heard the All Yours sample on Bryson Tiller's Right My Wrongs back in 2021 (i know, i know i was VERY late to the game considering FH came out in 2011 and TRAPSOUL in 2015).

Also check out:

Love Spirals Downwards

Lone

on the advice of someone who told me to take notes about the music i listen to, in the hopes of figuring out my sound as a dj. i'm trying to pay closer attention to the types of production i'm drawn to, the lyrical content, the mood, the influences on their music etc.

i'm (obviously) white as all hell, 2 generations removed from my cultural heritage, i don't have strong ties to any specific genres like so many great djs do. my musical influences have often come through my relationships with other people - changing the score of my life as they've come and gone.

tbh i may not have anything fresh to supply in terms of sonic analysis of kiss land. any XO can trace the synth-heavy 80s/90s pop lineage, the menacing strings of slasher horror soundtracks, and spacey echoes and distortions in the cyberpunk influences of the album. the hypnotic drum beats & angelic vocals sound like you’re being called to lucifer’s army & the kingdom of heaven all at once and not only are you not sure which one is which - you don’t care.

what is your soul worth anyways?

thematically kiss land deals with escapism & dissociation from different kinds of loss, the loss of innocence, of a lover, of the sense of self. for the weeknd & the women he references, this mainly takes the form of sex and drugs. both are easily accessible as a result of his growing fame and they’re usually if not always employed together to erase the possibility of feeling the ache of those losses by drowning in pleasure (or numbness). 

the attitude of resigned, nonchalant self-destruction fueling this hedonistic nightmare makes the glimpses of genuine pain & vulnerability throughout the album all the more seductive - they feel like finally earning the chance to connect with someone after you’ve given up on feeling anything at all. 

like most r&b, kiss land is written for a female audience - specifically one that has experienced mental illness, addiction, trauma and/or toxic relationship or family dynamics, or all of the above. the people who can relate to the weeknd are the people who have experienced the same losses that he alludes to in his music and use the same coping mechanisms, but that's not what makes us obsessed.

kiss land is devastating in its ability to validate the shadow self of the listener.

for an hour & 5 minutes, all our lowest impulses, all the parts of us that we feel shame for are held up to the light and worshipped (a feeling which can be easily mistaken for love if you've never had real love to begin with). the awareness and intentionality with which the weeknd uses this tactic to seduce the women he encounters feels ...manipulative? ...evil? ...human?

i think it's important to point out the mutuality of the arrangement, and the way fame & status can create a transactional relationship for each person involved - but the power imbalance is undeniable.

track: tears in the rain

time: 7:24

echoey percussion & vocals really giving that sense of being lost in the void

bassy synths

glitch noises